


Rowena's Study

by Kousa



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Harry Potter - Freeform, Head Boy Theodore Nott, Head Girl Hermione Granger, Hogwarts Eighth Year, My First Fanfic, Original Character(s), Romance, Slow Burn, Wing Man Draco Malfoy, best friend - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:48:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 47
Words: 127,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23744080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kousa/pseuds/Kousa
Summary: Hermione found a secret room in her third year of Hogwarts. What she didn't realize was that she wasn't the only one regularly using it. What happens when Hermione finds out who else has access to the room, and how will these unlikely friendships unfold and flourish? What will happen when Hermione starts to trust serpents...will they end up biting her instead?
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Theodore Nott
Comments: 178
Kudos: 491





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione was in her third year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry when the room first presented itself to her. She was in the library late one night, surrounding herself with the comforting scents of musty pages and burning oil from the flickering lamps. Harry had been staying up in his room obsessing over the marauders map, and Ron was so busy being mad at her because he thought Crookshanks had devoured Scabbers that she had no one to talk to anymore. She was tired of feeling alone even while being surrounded by people in the Gryffindor common room. It was strange that even though she was friends with everyone in her house, that without her boys she felt so utterly and completely isolated. So, she decided to be lonely in the library instead. And lonely she was. 

She sat at her favorite table in the back of the library near the history section. Most people didn't come to this section of the library, its books were generally covered in a fine layer of dust. It was easy to figure out what Professor Binns was going to assign in each history class, given that his lesson plan hasn't changed since he dropped dead, so the books most students needed were at the end of the first row and stayed there. Even Madam Pince refused to move them. History was one of her favorite subjects and she was thoroughly convinced that wizarding school did not place enough importance on it, especially considering that history was once again repeating itself. 

She sat there pouring over books containing various laws about magical creatures and their rights. Trying to find some obscure law that would guarantee Buckbeak's right to defend himself against an ignorant  _ prat _ with silver-blond hair. She scoffed to herself thinking about him whining over the constant pain he was in. Constant her arse, he didn't have to hear himself. Listening to him gripe was the definition of true agony.

She was certain that she was on to something because she found a section in a book that guaranteed the life of a dragon if it defended its nest against poachers just as a couple of rowdy Gryffindors entered the library and decided to have a full snogging session in the next aisle over. Rolling her eyes she tried to stay focused as the sixth year girl let out little giggles and tried to encourage her partner on. She just needed  _ somewhere  _ quiet to research damn it. 

Just as the thought entered her mind there was a slight grinding of stones coming from somewhere behind her. It reminded her of the way the bricks moved out of the way to allow her into Diagon Alley. Curiosity getting the better of her, she grabbed her vinewood wand, and walked slowly in the direction of the noise. There right at the end of the aisle containing the bibliographies of witches through the ages was a small oaken door. A door that Hermione was certain was not there before. 

Gathering up her courage, she approached the door, and found that it opened on its own as she made her way towards it. Inside she found the most curious little room. It had a large fireplace just across the door, which leapt to life as she entered. There were two blue overstuffed chairs in front of it with a small table in between them, and a warm looking rug. To the right of the fireplace was a comfy looking black couch that was positioned just under a window, and to her left was a desk that had a stack of parchment and several quills lined up and waiting. Just above the fireplace was a painting of a beautiful woman with long black locks, in a 3rd century dress that was a deep blue with silver trim. As Hermione stood there the women in the painting motioned for her to come closer. 

“I see another has found their way to my study,” The voice was deep for a womens and she spoke slowly and clearly. “Who are you young one?”

“Uhh- I am Hermione Granger Madame Ravenclaw,” Hermione said, because it was clear as day that this woman was a former founder of the house. As Hermione spoke, the woman's face broke into a small smile. 

“You are not of House Ravenclaw I see,” Rowena said as she knelt down on her dress to look closer to Hermione. “But you could have been. I see a great intellect and not a small amount of cleverness. But that is overshadowed by your need to prove yourself, and your inability to accept who you are. You are bold, and you are courageous in the face of adversity. Yes you belong to Godric, not me.” She said this last part a little sadly before standing back up and motioning to the room. 

“This is my study. It will only present itself to those who are in the most need-”

“Like the Room of Requirement?” Hermione blurted, before realising she was speaking to a founder of the school. “I’m-I’m so sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. That was- I'm sorry.” The small smile returned to Rowena’s face. 

“Never apologize to me for having questions; for without questions, how do we learn? But yes, it is exactly like the Room of Requirement in that it only appears for those who have real need. The need here is specific to those who need a place to study and are the brightest witches or wizards of the age. Once you find it, it will present itself to you if you need and will only allow those who are chosen inside.” Hermione took several steps into the room, and looked around as the door closed quietly behind her. It was warm and there were torches on the wall that slowly lit to provide just the right amount of light to read comfortably, allowing a small dance of shadows to begin on the walls.

“Has anyone else been chosen?” Hermione asked as she came to stand before the portrait of Rowena. 

“Of course others have been chosen. But I will admit it has been awhile since I’ve had more than one chosen at a time. As of now there is one other boy who has gained the room's favor. A young boy of Salazars with a clever mind and a clear wit who is clouded by choices made for him by his family.” 

Rowena looked around her room and gave Hermione an encouraging grin. “You can come and go as you please, and the door behind you will drop you off exactly where you want to be left. Study as long as you want into the night and the door will open to your dormitory if you wish. But you can only access the room from the library and only when it allows you too. But I have no doubt that you will be able to access it whenever you choose. The room seems to favor the two of you over any other students I have hosted.” She turned to walk into the portrait clearly leaving the conversation. Before she got too far into the magically painted land she turned and looked over her shoulder back at Hermione. “One more thing, I will not come back to rest here unless you have a question I feel you cannot answer on your own. In that case you need only knock three times on my portrait edge with your wand and I will come. Good luck Miss Hermione Granger of House Gryffindor. “

With that Hermione took one more look around the room before dashing back to her table to gather her books and rush into the newly found study haven to use. She decided she would only use it when she had a particularly hard day or particularly difficult homework that way she could still study with the boys if necessary. But, as she opened the door to the room and felt the warm air she let her face spread into the biggest grin she had ever had and let her loneliness get swept into the fireplace and launched into the waiting night time air. At least Hogwarts was listening to her. 


	2. Of Thestrals and Carriages

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot.Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

**_5 years later_ **

Hogwarts castle was lit against the black backdrop of the sky like a Christmas tree. Hermione sat in the back of a carriage as she waited for the thestrals to begin to move forward. As she gazed at the castle out beyond the trees she let out a long sigh as she saw the small window of the Gryffindor Common Room. No one was sitting with her currently, so she had a few moments to herself before the school year officially began. She had stayed behind on the train to make sure no first years had gotten lost, or no upperclassmen were too busy with each other to notice the train stopped. Now she sat on the carriage, relishing in the peace and quiet of the muggy night time air. As the humidity caused her hair to bush up and a small bead of sweat to make its way onto the back of her neck she took a deep breath and prepared herself for her final year at Hogwarts.

Once the war was over the teachers at Hogwarts created a council to make a decision based on what to do with the students whose school year was interrupted; and those who had been pulled from school because of the ongoing conflict. It was decided that any student who wanted to return would proceed to the next year's classes, but there would be study sessions designed to help any students that needed aid in subjects that were interrupted during the previous school year. Hermione's class needed to retake the entire year in order to take their N.E.W.T.’s; which meant that she would be taking several courses with Ginny and the other students from her year. This had added an extra course to everyone's schedules that was a designated study period which would be shared with a small group of students from varying houses and years in order to promote house unity and encourage students to ask for help. 

Hermione had sent Luna Lovegood ahead with Calvin Crowley in their own carriage so they wouldn't miss the sorting as she waited for the Head Boy for her year to come to the carriage. She personally agreed with McGonagall's decision that they should have four Heads this year. They did this, so that Ginny and Luna’s year did not have to skip their chances at becoming Head boy and girl just because of the returning ‘eighth’ years. It was an ingenious way to get Hogwarts back on track. Luna of course was a perfect choice for Head Girl, even if she did sometimes have her head in the clouds she would never stray from helping anyone, and no one could deny that her odd advice always seemed to be important sooner or later. Calvin Crowley was a mystery to Hermione. She didn't know much about him other than he was a Hufflepuff and had a knack for being in the right place to prevent bullying. He reminded her a tad of Cedric Diggory in his friendly disposition and had a bravery that could have rivaled Harry Potter. 

She had yet to meet the Head Boy for her year yet, but she knew from the chat on the train that it was a Slytherin, and the son of a Death Eater. In her mind that left one person, and she was not looking forward to seeing pale blond hair in her common room for the rest of the year. So she kept her head forward looking at the thestrals. Eventually the carriage dipped with the weight of the boy as he stepped up making it release a loud _creak_ into the night. She was so immersed in her analysis of the beasts that she nearly jumped off her seat as a strange voice finally spoke behind her. 

“So, you can see them now, Granger?” The voice was deep in timber, and so quiet it was almost lost among the echoes of crickets and the occasional groan of the trees as they bent in the wind. It was not a voice that she remembered ever hearing in her time at Hogwarts. It wasn't the voice of the boy she thought was supposed to be head boy, and out of shock and plain curiosity she turned towards her new companion.

“Nott?” She nearly choked out. He gave her a small sad smile and a quick nod. His dark black hair was a little longer than the last time she remembered seeing him, and fell in small waves in front of his deep rich blue eyes which were now searching her face as if trying to decide something. Seeming to have come to a conclusion he reached out a hand to her in greeting. 

“In the flesh, nice to meet you officially.” Hermione stared at his hand for several moments before taking it and giving it a small shake. His hands were warm compared to hers, and as his fingers closed over the top she realized it was big enough to completely engulf her smaller one. She pulled her hand away first as the carriage started their journey, and leaned back into her seat to try and appear relaxed. He was sitting exactly opposite of her at the very end of the bench seat in the carriage. She was certain if a strong wind picked up, he was going to be blown right off the back. As if the universe was trying to prove her right, at that moment they hit an exceptionally large bump and he had to grab onto the seat in order to keep from taking a tumble. 

“Can you scoot this way just a tad? You are making me nervous.” He raised an eyebrow at her before sliding down the way a couple of feet. He was still spaced from her, but no longer had a risk of road rash. She nodded in appreciation and looked back at the thestrals. “You see them too right?” She turned back towards him in time to see the very end of his nod. 

“I expect there are not a lot of students this year who won't be able to,” He said. His voice back to that low timber that he started with. Theodore Nott was a strange Slytherin, it didn't take her long to realize that. She racked her mind from first year to now and she couldn't come up with a single time that he had called her a foul name, or even jinxed her in school. But he was still a Slytherin, and she was a little wary of sharing a dorm with him for the next several months, not to mention his father was a Death Eater. A prolific one at that; research told her that while Snape was Voldemort's right hand, William Nott -Theodore's father- was his left, and his second most prolific coin purse right behind the Malfoys. 

Hermione sat there for a couple more minutes before deciding that she was going to try and put that behind them. At least as much as they could. He did just try to shake her hand and wasn't trying to antagonize her as of right now. And if he did? She could just hex him or ask to be placed in the Gryffindor Tower until the end of the year. She didn't want to have special treatment, but she did help Harry Potter kill the most powerful dark wizard in history last year, and if having special treatment would allow her to have a good quiet school year then she would use it. _But_ that was only if she _needed_ too. 

“So, I am not going to lie, I thought Malfoy was going to be Head Boy.” She said. While looking out over the now visible lake. 

“Disappointed it's me?” He asked. He was leaned back against the seat, his arms balancing along the back of the carriage. 

“No, I am kind of relieved. I didn't want to be called foul names all year.” She said playing with her hands in her lap. 

“I could call you foul names.” He said. He was looking at her seriously now, he moved his arms so they were now crossed over his chest. 

“I think I'm prepared to take that risk with you Nott.” She replied with a shrug. The carriage had stopped outside the front doors to the castle and she stood, gathering her small beaded bag before waiting for him to get down. To her surprise he offered his hand and she gratefully took it as she jumped off the back of the carriage, gravel crunching beneath her sneakers. “Before we go in.” She started as he turned to leave, stopping he slowly turned back to look at her fully. 

“I want to create a united front this year.” She said a plan slowly forming in her brain as she stood in the light of the castle. “Who better to show that prejudices should be squashed than a Muggleborn Gryffindor and a Pureblood Slytherin. I think that if we can show that we are at least civil to each other the younger students might follow example.” He was nodding slowly by the time she was done. 

“A united front.” His lips pulled into a small smirk as he gestured for her to stand next to him. She came up beside him and they entered the Great Hall. Head Boy and Head Girl a united front against a sea of stares and old prejudices. 


	3. Trauma Doesn't Die Easily

They had indeed missed the sorting ceremony. The Great Hall was decorated with floating candles that flickered against the enchanted ceiling which currently looked like the night sky. She couldn't help but find the constellation Draco, and smirked as she remembered she wouldn't have to room with the blond git. The feast itself was well underway, the cacophonous voices drowning out any conversation besides those with students that were sitting directly next to you. She gave a polite nod to Nott, and he gave her a small wave as a farewell before they parted to go to their house tables. 

It took her a couple of moments to find a spot big enough to squeeze into, but she was able to find one between Ginny Weasly and Neville Longbottom. She was facing the Slytherin table and noticed that Nott had found a spot by Malfoy at the end of the table. As he squeezed into his spot, Hermione noticed the intense looks the two boys were shooting at each other and what looked like a rather heated discussion. Before she could think further on it, a familiar Irish lilt drew her attention.

“Hiya Hermione,” Hermione broke her gaze and gave Seamus Finnigan a big grin.

“Hi Seamus, how was your holiday.” 

“Other than fighting against absolute tyranny? It wasn't half bad, my Da bought me season tickets to the Leprechauns for being a war hero.” He beamed with pride as he shoveled food into his mouth. 

“Sounds...fun.” Hermione replied trying not to let the way he was eating remind her of her favorite redhead. 

“I'm sure it will be. I just hope I can get out of class a couple of times to attend a game. Where's Harry and Ron?”

“Oh, they had to attend a meeting with the Aurors office. They should be here tomorrow for class though, McGonagall is letting them floo into her office after they are done.”After that the conversation was slowly dominated by the Irish teams chance of entering the Quidditch world cup, and whether or not the tickets were wasted with Seamus being in school. Hermione tuned it out and just ate a couple pieces of bread. She had always hated not being able to participate more in the discussion of quidditch. It was true that she knew the sport well enough, but the way people could drone on and on about a single game made her brain fuzzy. But, she could also drone on and on about the proper and improper applications of Dittany in any circumstance, so she just rolled her eyes and glanced around the Great Hall taking in the sights around her.

Before long Hermione's thoughts slowly dragged her back to the last time she was in Hogwarts. She remembered the smell of smoke and ash as she gazed across white blankets covering the dead. She could still feel the tingle of magic in the air as spell after spell were fired at her with the intention of ending her short life. She couldn't help but find it more difficult to breathe, it was like she had been pulled back in time. Before she knew it she heard a familiar and horrifying whisper in her ears “ _ bring me Harry Potter.”  _ Her breath came in shallower and shallower gasps. Her throat was burning with the effort to get the air in. She was starting to see black dots, and before she knew what was happening she felt gravity pulling her down and her head hit the stone floor with a deafening  _ crack _ . 

* * *

Hermione woke up to the sound of rustling around her. She heard several voices quietly murmuring but couldn't make out any words that were being said. Her eyes felt like they were glued shut, and she had to use more effort than normal to blink them open. As she did the light flared through her head causing pain to rack through her brain, and she immediately sealed her eyes again. She let out a stifled groan, and tried to sit up. 

“Stay down Miss Granger, Poppy just left to get you some potion to help your head. She should be back soon.” She knew that voice. She loved that voice. 

“Professor McGonagall, what happened?” She choked out as she opened her eyes again. The kindly professor was standing over her, her usually pristine appearance ruffled as her hair fell out of her tight bun in small fly-aways. Her dark eyes pierced Hermione as she studied her face taking in each small expression as she hovered over her student. As Hermione began to focus her eyes and look around she saw at least two other familiar faces. Ginny and Neville were standing there and looking on with concern stretched across their faces. 

“Well, Miss Granger, I'm afraid you fainted.” 

“Oh,” Hermione could hear the shock in her voice so she took a moment to take a breath before she continued. “Well that's better than having a troll smack me upside the head, which is what it feels like.”

She heard Neville let out a small chuckle, “You hit your head pretty good, I tried to catch you but I could only grab one arm. Sorry.” She glanced up at him and gave a small smile. 

“That's Ok, at least it wasn't a full force fall.” At that moment Madam Pomfry walked up into the now empty Great Hall and handed Hermione the potion. She drank it down giving the Healer a small smile in thanks. The liquid was thick and felt a little like sludge and as it hit her tongue she noticed it tasted like rancid oak leaves. As it went down her throat the relief was almost immediate. 

“Do you need to keep her for observation?” Ginny asked kneeling down by Hermione and grabbing her arm to help her up. 

“For a small bump on the head? Absolutely not. She just needs some rest.” Madame Pomfry said. “Make sure she gets to the eighth year Head Dormitory please Miss Weasley.” With that Madam Pomfry turned on her heel and left the stunned students to stare at her as she exited the Great Hall. 

“Well, that was different.” Neville said. 

“Yea she usually fusses over someone who was hurt. What gives?”

“The war changed us all in different ways Miss Weasley. Please take Hermione to the seventh floor. The eighth year Head Dormitory is behind the painting of Merlin's Tower. Mr. Nott should already be in there and should inform Miss Granger of the password after you knock. If he is not, just send me a patronus and I will come and unlock the door. Until then I'm going to have a word with Madame Pomfrey.”

After receiving the affirmative nods from her pupils the Head Mistress left them standing there and followed the Healer out the door. Hermione leaned on Ginny and Neville as they made their way up the ever changing staircases to the seventh floor. They walked past the entrance to the Gryffindor tower, and continued down the hallway that held the Room of Requirement to the large portrait of Merlin's Tower. 

Neville then handed Hermione over to Ginny to lean more on the redhead and knocked on the door, putting himself in between the two girls. Hermione looked down and noticed that Neville had his wand in his hand, with a  _ lumos _ charm lit. It would have convinced Hermione that he needed the light if not for the torches all around them; Hermione was smart enough to realize the reason the wand was out was because of who was on the other side of the door and not because Neville needed to see. 

They didn't have to wait long before the portrait swung inward and Theodore Nott stood before them. He blocked the door for a moment before his eyes flicked from Neville's face to Ginny’s before landing on Hermione’s. He then stepped sideways and made a sweeping gesture with his arm offering them entrance. 

“Which room is hers,” Neville asked. He glanced around the small common room trying to get his bearings. There were several plush chairs and a small loveseat placed in front of a roaring fire to the right. Next to the fireplace was a single doorway that led to one of the bedrooms. Across from it were two doors. One of which led to a bedroom and the other to a shared bathroom. Directly across from the portrait doorway was a small kitchenette with a stove and a small island with bar stools. The room was decorated with hues matching Slytherin and Gryffindor. 

“The right one, next to the fireplace, but she will have to set up a password before she enters. Is she alright, she looks ready to pass out.” Hermione could hear Nott talking, but darkness was slowly encompassing her vision so she was unable to see if the concern in his voice matched his face.

“Pomfrey gave her a potion, it was supposed to help her but…” Ginny managed to grunt while half dragging Hermione into the room. Neville realised Hermione was no longer walking but was stumbling into the room and so he made his way quickly back to Ginny and gingerly picked Hermione up carrying her bridal style to her room's door. 

“Hermione, I need you to say wrackspurts.” He said, giving her a little shake. 

“Wra-wra...wrackspurts.” Hermione managed through the haze. It was enough and the door opened. 

“I guess that potion was also a sleeping draught. Would have been nice to know as we carried her up seven flights of stairs.” Nevilles chest rumbled with his frustration and once again he was moving. He looked back and noticed that Nott had followed them into Hermione's room and had probably heard her password too. He gave Ginny a meaningful look, she was better at the intimidation thing. 

“Don't get any ideas, Nott,” Hermione could feel herself being sat down on a comfy bed, and the covers getting pulled up over her clothes. 

“Wouldn't dream of it Red.” 

“We will tell her to change the password tomorrow. And If I hear even a whisper of you doing anything to her tonight...you will wish I had only Bat Bogeyed you!” Hermione could hear more shuffling as Ginny's threat of her famous hex died on the air. Eventually the door was closed behind them, and Hermione surrendered to the darkness for the second time in less than two hours. 


	4. Happiness is Hard to Find

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot.Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione woke the next morning feeling considerably better than she had the night before. Granted the night before she had a mild concussion due to her inability to control her emotions and her pension for unimaginable bad luck, but she felt better nonetheless. She tried to climb out of bed but got tangled in her sheets due to the fact no one had taken off her shoes the night before and hit the stone floor with a _Ka-thunk_ and a groan. She found herself hoping that her dorm mate was still asleep or had happened to go down to breakfast early (even though the kitchens didn't open for another half hour) or had simply disappeared into a black void where he couldn't have heard her fall but a slight knock at the door proved her still unlucky. 

“Alright in there Granger?” She heard Notts' voice muffled from the other side of the door.

“Fine! Just being my usual clumsy self.” 

“Well, that's good then. Uhh...when you get the chance our schedules have been sent to us. They are out here.” 

“Oh, fantastic. I'll be out soon I just have to get ready.” She slowly began to untangle her feet from the constricting holds of her bed sheets. After a couple of frustrating tries, and feeling as though it would probably be easier to untangle herself from devil's snare, the sheets finally released her. 

Freed from her polyester prison, Hermione hopped up and began to rummage through her clothes. She grabbed a uniform and her hygiene products and rushed from the bedroom towards the shared bathroom. The bathroom was simple and efficient, a tub/shower, a toilet, and sink. There was only one door so she didn't have to worry about it connecting to Nott’s room and him getting a glimpse of what she hid under her uniform. After muttering a quick locking charm, she jumped into the shower and cleaned herself. After taking extra time to let the new conditioner she bought soak into her curls and rinsing it, she brushed her teeth and was dressed to start the day. 

Hermione Granger always thought she was an early riser. She would be up before Harry and Ron every day, and was usually the first to be down for breakfast. When she walked out of the bathroom that morning she learned the true definition of a morning person. Theodore Nott had not only already showered and dressed for the day, but it looked like he had also made himself several cups of tea, and had already started studying his new potions book. As Hermione approached she noticed that he was a good quarter of the way through. 

“Have you read the section on reversing the effects of unwanted sleeping draught? I found Kalvins theory about implementing Merlap with Tungston root fascinating.” She sat down on one of the plush chairs, savoring in the feeling of fabric against her skin as she pulled her legs up and dropped them over the armrest. Making sure her robe was covering her in case her skirt rode up. 

“Hmmm? Oh yeah, I've actually read this book already, I'm just refreshing myself before class this morning.” Nott said as he pulled himself from the text in front of him and faced her. “Speaking of which,” He grabbed a piece of parchment from the small coffee table and handed it to her. She nodded in thanks and began reading. 

**_Ms. Granger,_ **

**_Due to your requests at the end of your sixth year, and your exceptional scores on your O.W.L.’s you have been placed in the following courses._ **

**_MWF_ **

**_Potions-Dungeon Room 205-Slughorn_ **

**_Charms-Room 2e-Flitwick_ **

**_Herbology-Greenhouse 4-Sprout_ **

**_Transfiguration- Room 1B-McGregor_ **

**_T/TR_ **

**_Advanced Arithmancy Studies-Room 7a-Vector_ **

**_Ancient Runes-Room 6a-Babling_ **

**_Inter-House Study Hall-Library-Pince_ **

**_Defense against the Dark Arts-Room 3c-Jacobson_ **

**_If you have any questions or plan on changing your subjects due to unforeseen circumstances please come see Headmistress McGonagall before the 30th of September, after which point this class schedule will be considered permanent and you will be expected to take your N.E.W.T.’s in these chosen subjects. N.E.W.T.’s will be scheduled to be taken by all seventh and returning eighth year students between May 20th and June 5th of 1999. Please be aware that these scores will affect future opportunities for students and to help guide them to successful careers. Have a great school year._ **

**_Professor Daniel Jacobson Gryffindor Head of House._ ** _  
  
_

“Well, that looks easy enough.” She muttered to herself while grabbing her wand and summoning her book bag and necessary texts for the day. Excited to start the year with breakfast and seeing her friends again she started dashing to the door, “I’ll see you around Nott,” She called as she slipped out the portrait.

“Granger-” she heard him call from within, but she was already half way down the hall. As she made her way down the staircases and closer to the Great Hall she began to feel like there was a small weight sitting on her chest. Realizing that returning to the Great Hall, and having another fainting episode might not be the best way to start her day, she decided to skip breakfast and went instead to sit outside the potions classroom and wait for class to begin. 

She didn't have to wait long, and eventually Professor Slughorn came puffing down the stairs from breakfast with bright round cheeks and a quiet, “Good Morning.” He unlocked the door to the room, and she took a spot near the back of the class, a spot unusual for her but all part of her new year new me attitude. She wanted to let her peers answer the questions this year, and she wanted to focus on learning, and enjoying herself. Professor Slughorn raced around the room getting his supplies set up as more students filed into the room. Harry and Ron waved as they came into class and took a table ahead of her, having chosen to partner together this year. Ginny came in and partnered with a girl from her year, and Nott and Malfoy joined the table across from her partnered together. 

After waiting an extra few minutes for any stragglers the class began. Hermione, for the first time in her Hogwarts career, was left without a partner for potions class. As she stared around at the students she began to notice the all too familiar feeling of loneliness begin to creep in. Shoving her focus onto her parchment and letting her hair block out the world from her face, she concentrated on taking diligent notes for the lecture on the many uses of expired lima beans and tried to ignore the dark feeling as it slithered into her soul. 

* * *

“OK class, after what we experienced this past year I thought we would start off our academic adventures with a bit of light! How many in here can cast a patronus charm?” Professor Flitwick was standing on a large stack of tomes next to a small podium, practically bouncing with glee as he called the class into session. After her long potions class Hermione was glad to come back to the surface of Hogwarts, she felt like the gloomy dungeons had done nothing to improve her mood and was convinced being in the charms classroom with the sunlight streaming in would improve that. 

As Flitwick took into account all the hands in the air he seemed surprised by the number, and nearly jumped off of his precarious stack, his gray hair flying up and down in his excitement. All of Dumbledor’s Army had raised their hand leaving only the Slytherins with their hands down. “Wonderful,” he said, clapping his hands, “who would like to explain how best to cast and utilize this charm.” Hermione had been busy drawing on a spare bit of parchment so it had taken her a few moments to notice the room had gone silent. When she had glanced up she was met with at least twenty pairs of eyes as the entire room had been looking at her expectantly, waiting for her to answer the question.

Harry waited a couple of heart beats before raising an eyebrow at her in question. When she refused to meet his eye and looked back down at her paper the room remained silent. Eventually he got the message and began talking, “Right...uhh the charm is basically light magic personified. Take for example any dark curse, in order to cast it you have to have hatred or anger or other negative emotions in your heart. You have to want to hurt something, or someone. With a patronus you have to focus on all the good in yourself, usually this can be done by focusing on an extremely happy memory. Then using the incantation _Expecto Patronum_. It is used to ward off dark magic and dark beings, most notably, but not only, dementors.” By the time Harry had finished he was running his hands through his black hair nervously, making it stick up even more, not used to being the center of attention in class. 

“Excellent Mr. Potter, fifteen points to Gryffindor. So, those of you who can cast a patronus, how many can cast a full corporeal-oh that many!” Flitwick barely held back his astonishment as almost all the hands from Dumbledors Army again shot up, all except Neville and Dean Thomas who could only cast an incorporeal version of the spell. “Well let's have everyone move the desks to the back of the room for some demonstrations please.” 

There was a scuffling from around the room until the desks were levitated out of the way and the students lined up on either side of each other, facing students from the opposite house. “Alright Mr. Potter, you first.” Flitwick waited as Harry said the incantation and his stag erupted from his wand standing gracefully before him. “Mr. Weasley, you next.” Ron cast his and his dog ran around Harry's stag trying to get the regal beast to play, the pale light dancing across the space of the room. This was met with quite a few laughs as the stag stared down at the mangy dog with an almost exasperated look. “Very good- Next,” They went down the line until the room was full. Ginny's Horse, and Seamus’ Fox joined the fray, finally giving Rons dog someone to play with. Neville and Dean cast their incorporeal form which took the shape as two large balls of white light. They both held theirs just long enough to prove they could cast it before letting them dim and eventually fade. 

Finally, it was Hermione's turn. She was facing Theodore Nott for the second class in a row. As he stood across from her, looking more relaxed than she had ever seen him with his white oxford rolled up to his elbows, he gave her a small smile causing a dimple to form on the side of his cheek. She gave a nod and raised her new wand. Unsurprisingly after her original vinewood wand was confiscated by Bellatrix during her ‘stay’ in Malfoy Manor, the malicious witch had snapped it. Her new wand was made from Rowan wood, with a dragon-heartstring core, and she was still getting used to it. 

She tried to think of the memory she usually used, her mother and father holding her during a Christmas Movie marathon when she was eleven, the first time she had returned from Hogwarts, when everything in her life finally made sense. As she raised her wand to cast the spell a familiar dark feeling crested her chest and the incantation left her mouth as she remembered she would never have a moment like that with her parents again, because they were in Australia having had their memories wiped...by her, their only daughter. For the first time since Harry had taught her the spell; it failed. 

Shaking her head she gave the professor a sheepish look before finding another memory. It was her, Ron, and Harry. They were sitting in front of a fire fifth year just after she told Ron he had the emotional range of a teaspoon. Smiling to herself as she raised her wand and began to say the incantation a second time, but just as the last syllable slipped past her lips she remembered that after that day, Arthur Weasly was attacked, and then Sirius had died and the war had unofficially started. A few wisps of white energy left her wand, but nothing else happened. “It's ok Miss Granger, not everyone can cast a patronus, it is a rather delicate charm.” Professor Flitwick's considerate voice filtered across the low murmurings of the rest of the DA. 

“Don't you think I know that!” Hermione snapped. She had never in her life raised her voice to a teacher, and yet once the first word left her mouth she couldn't stop, even though she was appalled at herself. “I know this is a difficult charm to work, I've done several difficult charms in the past 7 years of my life that would make even Merlin himself congratulate me. I did not raise my hand when you asked so I could feel included in this _demonstration_ , I can cast this freaking spell!” the Professor stared at her wide eyed as he began to twist his wand in his hand, clearly unnerved by Hermione's outburst. 

“ ‘Mioine, Calm down its-” 

“Don’t tell me to calm down Ronald. You’ve seen me do it.” She let the incantation roll of her lips a third time and still nothing happened. Feeling hot frustrated tears roll down her cheeks, she felt the stares of the Slytherins in front of her.

“Look, we finally found something the Mudblood can't do!” a voice sneered from somewhere down the line. 

“Miss Parkison! That is 20 points from Slytherin and you will be serving two weeks detention with the Head Mistress so she can know about your lack of respect for fellow students.” The damage was done though, and as Hermione looked up at the other students across the room she saw several snickering faces and heard more than one whispering voice coming from both sides of the room. Refusing to meet anyone's stare straight on she stormed out of the room leaving her bag and her parchment behind as she made her way as quickly as she could to her dorm. She didn't notice the concerned blue eyes as they watched her exit the charms classroom. 

It wasn't until she got to the door that she remembered she forgot to get the password from Nott. Letting out another cry of frustration she rubbed her hands over her face feeling it hot and flushed, swiping wet tears away in anger. Utterly exhausted and mentally drained she sat underneath the portrait of Merlin's tower and cried. As she gave in to the emotions that assaulted her, thunderclouds and lightning bounced across the painted canvas, perfectly matching the inner storm she felt just below the surface. 


	5. Years Overdue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot.Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione stayed next to the portrait all through lunch; ignoring the painful gurgles from her stomach in favor of avoiding the confused looks from her peers and the sneers from the other table. Her mind raced back to the war, and how much easier it was to ignore being called a Mudblood when she knew there was a reason, some greater force that was driving the view of her being lesser than others into the minds of her peers. 

She snorted to herself as she leaned her head back against the cool stone and closed her eyes. She had been foolish to believe that when Voldemort was defeated that the outright bullying of her blood would at least slow down. One defeated enemy could not change years of prejudice. That being said she couldn't help but feel disappointed in herself. Disappointed for not being able to conjure her otter (the form her Patronus takes), but also because after almost 8 years of being called a Mudblood she still let it affect her so much. 

Why did she care if Pansy freaking Parkinson called her by a foul name? What did it matter if that prissy pureblooded witch thought Hermione was lesser than her? She had helped defeat the Dark Lord himself, and had saved the Chosen One on more than one occasion. Without her Harry would have died his first year; fallen off his broom, or strangled by devils snare. Yet here she sat, slow tears still rolling down her splotchy cheeks because a teenage girl thought it was ok to make fun of her for having ‘muddy blood’. It was stupid really. Ridiculous. Unheard of. Impossible. She could beat Pansy at any subject on any day; so why did she feel the need to prove herself? But she did, and it sucked. Unconsciously she reached up her sleeve and rubbed along the raised flesh that still bared the stain of prejudice.

“The password is Kingsfoil, Granger.” Pulling her hand quickly from her sleeve Hermione looked up, taking in Notts haggard appearance. Starting from the bottom her eyes were first drawn to his fists. Both hands were caked in blood, and his knuckles were ripped open. His shirt was slightly torn and untucked as if it had been yanked on, and he had a small cut over his left eye, which was currently bruising. His bottom lip was split at the edge and he kept licking it over and over as if trying to prevent the blood from spilling down his face. When she noticed she was staring she stood quickly and began wiping her tears waiting for him to open the portrait; after he did he allowed her to go in first, quickly shutting it behind him. 

“What happened to you?” Hermione asked as he came into the light of their common room. Fears for herself were quickly trumped as she saw a fellow classmate hurt. He shrugged at her, averting his royal blue eyes and turned to head to the bathroom. He didn't shut the door behind him so she followed him, propping herself up against the frame watching as he grabbed a washcloth and wetted it with a simple _Aguamenti_. He then began wiping at the injuries on his face trying not to wince as the cold cloth met the cut on his lip. 

“A simple healing spell would probably take care of those,” Hermione said as she watched fascinated as he tried to take care of the injuries a muggle way. 

“Yeah, you're probably right. Too bad I’'m not good at those,” He chuckled as he rewet the towel and began on his eye. 

“You’re good at practically everything you do. Third in the class if my memory serves right. Third to me and Malfoy.” She gave him a small smirk, trying to make him smile as she teased him a little. It kind of worked, as half of his perfect mouth turned up into a small grin. _Wait...perfect?_ _Why did she think it was perfect?_ Shaking her bushy head to try and remove the strange intrusive thoughts she brought her attention back to him as he spoke. 

“Granger...I think you are mistaken.” He said with a sigh, turning his eyes to her. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Nevermind, it's not that important anyway.” He moved past her into the common room before slumping down on the love seat and covering his eyes with his arm. 

“Either way, I could heal you if you want.” She moved to the chair closest to his head, sitting at the very edge waiting for him to request the healing spells just like Harry or Ron would have.

“Just drop it Granger. I'll be fine. No life threatening injuries here.” He let out an exasperated huff of breath.

“Why? When a couple of incantations and then poof you’re all better.”

“It's not something you would understand.” 

Of all the things Nott could have said to Hermione at that exact moment, he happened to pick one of the things that she was sure she could kill him over. “I wouldnt understand?” She started with a hiss which eventually led into her yelling, “Why? Because im just too stupid too grasp the complexities of a pure-blooded male as he licks his wounds from whatever tussel he got into? Because I can't understand how to heal you properly? Because _my_ magic might taint your already _flawless_ magical core?” She wasn't sure at what point she had stood, but now she was leaning over the top of him as he looked on with almost a pained expression. His eyes were wide and his dark brows were scrunched up in confusion. He was still laying on the couch, giving her the rare advantage of height and she was taking it for everything it was worth.

“You know what, Nott? I am so sick of Slytherin Pure-Blooded ignorant, inbred, slack-jawed morons telling me what I can and cannot do. What I can or cannot understand. I am so sick of every single thing I've ever accomplished being thrown back in my face like I'm some sort of neanderthal incapable of success. That I was just lucky, or was just blessed to have the Chosen One by my side.” She scoffed at this, if only they knew how much she had actually done. How many times she had kept her mouth shut while he stood there and took all the praise, with only a ‘Yeah, Hermione helped some’ for her efforts. Usually that would have been enough, but for some reason she felt like it wasn’t anymore, that at some point people had forgotten that she wasn't just Harry Potter's swotty side-kick. She was **Hermione Freaking Granger** , brightest witch of her age, and top of her class. 

“I’ll have you know that I outsmarted a riddle designed by Snape my first year, and saved Harry’s life as he was nearly strangled by a plant. A _PLANT_ . Good luck having a savior when he's compost. Second year I found out it was a basilisk that was targeting muggleborns and survived a run in with that... _creature_. Not only did I save myself but I also saved Penelope Clearwater, but did I get thanks for that...NO. It was ‘great job finding the chamber Harry’; he didn't even know where to look until I figured out where the dang thing was hiding. Third year….well third year...I saved a lot of people that year, through means which I don't have to explain to you.” She paused for a second and took another deep breath, her hair crackling with energy as it started to stand up on end with residual magic. Nott just stared up at her as she continued her rant.

“Fourth year I prepared Harry for the tournament, and was good enough for Pure-Blooded heart throb Viktor Krum, while also creating an organization to help underprivaged creatures that you purebloods just love to torture. Fifth year I fought in the department of Mysteries and was able to survive a curse from Dolohov while also navigating the Inquisitorial Squad and **CREATED** Dumbledore's Army. Oh, and I also mastered the Protean Charm which is N.E.W.T. level magic! Sixth year I fought more Death Eaters outside the Astronomy Tower, and Seventh year I helped defeat one of the darkest wizards of all time! So, I think I would understand. But at this point I don't think I care to try anymore.” She stood there for a couple more moments chest heaving and face flushed with her outburst. 

Nott had propped himself up on his arms at some point during the outburst and was currently laying wide eyed as she finally came down from her fury. His dark hair was falling on his face, and he kept sweeping his gaze over her face as if scared she might literally explode. After she took a few calming breaths and her face returned to a near normal color he spoke. So softly she almost couldn't hear him over the rushing of blood in her ears and the crackling of the fire behind her. “Better?” 

“Not really, no.” she said as she stared down at him.

“Well, I think that was long overdue. Sounds like it might have been years overdue.” He reached a hand up and pulled it down his face a couple of times before continuing, “I am not keeping this from you because it’s some secret pure-blood thing. I am keeping it from you because it is not something that will benefit you to know. I am one person whose problems you will never have to solve.” He said softly, finally pulling himself up into a seated position and resting his arms on his knees, holding his hands together. His mood took a sudden shift then and he dropped his gaze from her face and to the fire. 

He stared at it for several moments before speaking again, this time with a deep and slightly somber timber “But, since I know you really want to know I’ll tell you. The healing thing...my father told me long ago that we wear the wounds of the flesh as a reminder that we fucked up. That we made a mistake...that someone got the upper hand on us at one point and that we have to strive to be better. If it's not life threatening, I wont heal it.” He gave a very weak smile and a humorless chuckle, “Granted each time he said that it wasn't my face that was fucked up.” 

He shook his head then and ran his fingers through his dark hair before standing in one swift motion. As if a switch had been turned off he gazed at her with careful nonchalance and a crooked grin.“Afternoon classes start in twenty minutes, and since yours is in the greenhouse,” He leaned in close to her, so close she could smell the spearmint from his toothpaste, “that means you are already late.” He gave her a small wink as the words slowly sank in. With a start she took off towards the portrait, racing to the greenhouses that were on the other side of the castle. As she left, Nott slowly shook his head before allowing his gaze to flick to the fire. Chuckling to himself he headed towards the portrait, his bag hanging loosely on his side as he made his way to Transfiguration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shout out to those who enjoy Lord of The Rings--The password to get into the head dorms is a nod to the Athelas plant: all rights to that go to Mr. Tolkien.


	6. A Hero's Welcome

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot.Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione spent the rest of her day ignoring the concerned glances the other Gryffindors kept shooting her. Harry met her outside of the greenhouse with the bag she had left in Charms and a small concerned smile. She was quiet in Herbology where she learned that Professor Sprout and Professor Slughorn had decided to create a long term project in which each partnered group in Slughorn's class would have to develop a new potion based on plants that they would grow and care for in Sprouts. This was supposed to last until the end of term and to help them with the written portions of their exams. The problem was that Hermione didn't have a partner.

As she walked to Transfiguration she tried to figure out a study schedule that would allow her the time to develop this potion. She was muttering to herself with her head down at the floor so she didn't see the shine of shoes in front of her until it was too late and she was sprawled on the floor on her bum. “Sorry there, Granger!” 

The slow drawl came from above her as a pale hand extended in front to help her up. Her gaze followed the hand up to the arm and eventually the pale pointed face of Draco Malfoy. He was giving her a small smirk, but it didn't seem to have any malicious intent behind it. After a couple of seconds just staring at him he rolled his eyes and shook the extended hand in order to get her attention. She eventually grabbed it and he hauled her effortlessly to her feet. 

“You alright? It didn't seem like you hit your head but if you did I'm sure your bushy hair would have cushioned the fall.” He said. It was something that he would have said when they were younger, but it lacked the venom that his voice usually held. That coupled with the ever present smirk led her to believe that he was actually teasing her...playfully. 

“Uhh-Yeah im fi-”

“Malfoy!” They both flicked their heads in the direction of the voice and saw Harry and Ron rushing towards them. The latter was more red faced then Hermione had seen him since the war. 

“Potter, Weasel.” Malfoy nodded to them as they got closer. The boys moved to either side of Hermione and she felt Ron's hand as he tried to pull her behind him in some sort of show of chivalry. She shook him off of her and glared up at him. 

“What were you doing with your hands all over ‘Mione!” Ron demanded, having not seen or ignored Hermione's glare. 

“I was helping her up. Next time I will make sure to leave her on the floor.” Malfoy said rolling his eyes as he leaned back on his heels and crossed his arms, a bored look crossing his face. 

“Thank you by the way,” Hermione added as she tried to elbow past Ron to look at Malfoy. He gave her a nod, and then turned back to the two boys in front of her. 

“Yeah, thanks for helping her up-” Harry, who was now looking uncomfortable started to run his hands through his hair, “It's just...old habits and all that.” He shrugged letting his face blush a little in embarrassment. 

“I get it. S’Not a big deal,” Malfoy said before walking past them at a brisk pace, his hands jammed in his pockets, as he stared at the floor. Hermione watched him leave as he exited the building and began to make his way across the grounds towards the greenhouses. Finally, she turned her attention back towards her best friends. 

“Well, that was kind of rude of you two.” 

“Rude of us! Hermione, we turned the corner and saw you alone with Malfoy. What were we supposed to do?” Ron asked. His face was maintaining its red hue as he turned to face her.

“You could have trusted me to handle someone like Malfoy  _ if _ I was in trouble.” She stated factually, refusing to encourage any behavior that fueled this age old house rivalry. 

“‘Mione, it's not that we don't trust you...we just don't want to see you hurt.” Harry tried. His voice was soft and there was a concerned look that glossed over his mossy eyes. He laid a hand on her shoulder and gave it an encouraging squeeze. 

“I know Harry, really I do. But...I am more than capable of handling myself. Come on, let's get to class before all the seats are taken. You can sit with me since you sat next to Ronald in potions,” She said giving him a playful grin. He smiled back and wrapped his arm around her shoulders as they continued towards their class. 

When they got to the class that they shared with fellow seventh and eighth year students in Ravenclaw and Gryffindor they took seats in the middle because they were the only ones left. The front had been claimed by the Ravenclaws and the back was full of the other Gryffindors. Ron sat next to Ginny and immediately leaned his head forward and rested it on his hands, looking like he was going to use this class to catch up on some lost sleep. Hermione rolled her eyes and grabbed her ink and quill out and laid a small stack of parchment on the desk. She watched as Harry just grabbed a quill and motioned to her pot of ink, she smiled and pushed it in between them to share thinking to herself that somethings would never change. 

The teacher entered through the back of the classroom with a flourish. His long blond hair hung down to his shoulders in smooth waves, and his eyes were a brilliant green. He was relatively muscular with a tall build, though Hermione guessed he was shorter than Ron. “Good afternoon class,” he called in a thick Irish accent that made Hermione focus on his lips in order to understand what he was saying. “I am your new Transfiguration instructor and you can feel free to call me Professor McGregor.” He had made it to the front of the classroom and gave a wide grin that sent a couple of Ravenclaw girls sighing. Hermione heard Harry scoff as he leaned over to her. 

“You would think these girls would have gotten better since second year. They are acting like it’s Lockhart back with his memories,” He rolled his eyes as the last sentence caused Hermione to giggle. 

“You two…” Hermione looked up and saw the Professor had moved closer to them and was now staring at them both. “Ahh Mr. Potter. Savior of the Wizarding world. First, let me thank you for saving my family from You-Know-Who. My mother was muggle-born and was a person who was going to be ‘questioned’ by the Ministry. For saving her you have my gratitude. That being said, your fame will not be an excuse for you to talk during my class, is that clear?” He wasn't rude when he spoke, but his eyes left no real room for debate. Hermione was impressed that he was able to take control of the entire room, who were now all watching the exchange with rapt attention. 

“Of course Professor, won't happen again.” Harry replied as he stole a sheet of Hermione's parchment earning him a playful glare from his friend. 

“You must be Miss Granger. Professor McGonagall has told me that I should expect great things from you as you are one of the top students in your year. The same, however, goes for you, please don't interrupt my class.” She nodded her head and lowered her gaze. The professor moved to the front of the classroom and raised his wand, causing several pieces of chalk to glide through the air to the black board and begin writing. 

“Now that that nastiness is out of the way a little bit about me. I attended here at Hogwarts and was sorted into the best house here at this prestigious school, any guesses?” He waited patiently as the shouts of Gryffindor! and Ravenclaw! erupted from the students. He gave a small smile, “Close, but no. I was sorted into Hufflepuff which is the BEST house, no denying it. Spent seven wonderful years here and graduated in 1989. That means I am barely older than you folks, but I am very skilled in the art of Transfiguration and I am very excited to teach you. These first few weeks we will focus mainly on theory and then go into practicality around mid-October. Please copy what is on the board and then we will spend the remainder of class in discussion.” He gave them a smile and went to his desk where he picked up a book and read while they quietly transcribed the board’s information. 

The rest of the class was spent in heated discussions between the Gryffindors and the Ravenclaws. The Gryffindors had trouble keeping up with the Ravenclaws, especially since Hermione was still refusing to participate in class. By the end of the class Hermione was ready to go to the library to spend the rest of her day studying. Giving an excuse to Harry and Ron as they left class she waved to them as they went to the Great Hall and she rushed to the library. 

When she entered the room she let out a sigh of relief as the scent of books and lantern oil filtered through the air. She was having a rough day, and she hadn't seen it in over a year, so she wasn't surprised when her feet slowly led her to the aisle that held bibliographies of famous witches. She was surprised to see that the old wooden door was already there. It usually took a couple seconds to appear, but she figured Hogwarts was just aware of how bad she needed the room. She walked forward and the door opened as it always did, so she barely looked around as she trudged to the already lit fire beneath the empty portrait and sunk down into one of the perfectly stuffed chairs.

“Well, hello there Granger,” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should have a regular posting schedule on Wednesdays and Sundays until this story is finished. I just wanted to give you guys extra chapters so you could hopefully become engrossed/addicted to my story. Good luck on your adventures!


	7. Making Peace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot.Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione jumped out of her chair wand raised as she stared in shock at Draco Malfoy, who was currently sitting at the desk in the Ravenclaw’s Study quill in hand, and a smirk covering his pale face. She didn't lower her wand until his grey eyes flicked down to her hand and back up to her eyes. Once she realized that she was essentially holding him at wand point she slowly lowered her arm. “So, you’re the Slytherin Rowena told me about? The one who has used the room since before third year? She said that-” 

“Actually,” a voice from behind her interrupted, “that’s me,” Hermione's wand was raised again as she turned on point to stare at the figure currently sitting on the couch under the window. Nott gave her an amused grin as she stared at him, and then back at Malfoy. 

“But-But she said only one other student had access.” Hermione's mind was whirling as she tried to figure out how both Nott and Malfoy were in her sacred place. Nott glanced at her wand and raised a single eye brow as he held up his hands in a placating gesture. 

“Twitchy wand arm, Granger?” he slowly slid the book he was reading off of his knee, while uncrossing his legs. 

“Sorry,” She glanced over at Malfoy and gave him a small smile, “old habits and all that.” repeating Harry’s earlier sentiment earned her a small chuckle from Malfoy as he moved to the front of the desk and leaned against it while crossing his ankles. 

“When did you find the room?” Nott asked from the couch as she lowered her wand. His bruised face looked worse than when she had seen him earlier, but the cuts seemed relatively healed, with only small red lines indicating where his flesh was beginning to scab. 

“Oh, uhh 3rd year. I needed a place to research a way to save Buckbeak,” She glanced at Malfoy out of the corner of her eye, but he had seemed to find a spot on the wall next to the desk extremely fascinating. 

“I found it second year, I needed to get away from some...toxicity taking place in the Slytherin common room.” His gaze flicked behind her and landed on Malfoy, and she knew what he meant. That was the first year that Malfoy had called her a Mudblood. She figured that it was then that the prejudice really took off in their year, and it only made sense it would be pretty bad in the Slytherin common rooms too. 

“You?” She glanced over at Malfoy, her back was now facing the fire and it was starting to get uncomfortably hot so she moved to one of the chairs levitating it back away from the fire so they could form a triangle to talk. 

“Sixth year.” That was all that needed said, and she nodded as she sat down. It was no secret that Malfoy was researching ways to rebuild the vanishing cabinet all through sixth year. It made sense that the room would present itself when he was going through so much turmoil. Trying to rebuild something that was near impossible while having the stress of his mother being tortured by Voldemort everyday that he failed had taken its toll on him. 

“I had wondered who the Gryffindor was. Rowena told me about you when I found the room, but she refused to say names.” Malfoy said as he slowly sat up on the desk, letting his feet dangle. “I found Theo in here seventh year before Halloween. He was shocked, turns out no one had been chosen in like 50 years,” He looked over at Nott for confirmation and when it was given the form of a nod he continued, “until he came along. Since Ravenclaw never comes back to her portrait he wasn't informed we were chosen. When I told him there was another student, and a Gryffindor at that, we took bets as to who it was. Speaking of which-” He jumped off the desk and walked over to Nott, reached into his pocket and handed him a pouch full of galleons. “Thought it was Potter,” he explained as he turned the other chair so it faced the couch and slumped into it. 

“How much did you bet?” She asked. 

“Well,” Nott began as he counted the galleons, “100 galleons if we got it right.” he looked up and gave her a cheshire grin, his blue eyes sparked with mischief in the torch light, “I was right.” He winked and then went back to counting. Hermione sputtered. 100 galleons? That was nearly 500 pounds, and a ridiculous amount to bet! 

“That’s a bit excessive, don't you think?” She asked as she pulled her feet up and sat cross-legged in the chair. 

“I mean, not for us.” Malfoy shrugged. They sat there for a few more minutes in silence. 

“So...feeling any better?” Nott asked, his eyebrows raised in question as he looked over her appearance. 

“I would be if I didn't get in trouble during Transfiguration. Today has just not been my day.” She sighed as she leaned back in her chair. 

“Granger? In trouble? Blasphemy!” Malfoy held up his hands in mock outrage. Hermione just stared at him for a few seconds before bursting out into hysterical laughter. She was laughing for so long and so hard that she actually had tears coming out of her eyes. Once she finally calmed down she found both boys staring at her like she had a second head. 

“Sorry, it was just the audacity of the situation. I mean Malfoy making a joke and for my benefit instead of my expense.” She started laughing again, but sobered more quickly this time, “Speaking of which, that is the second time you’ve been nice to me today. I think that is a new record. Thank you,” She gave him a small nod. 

“Well, I’m almost out of nice points so don't get used to it.” He said as he raised his wand and summoned a bright green apple from his bag into his hand. As soon as she saw the piece of fruit her stomach released the loudest growl that she had ever heard causing her face to blush a bright magenta as she tried to avoid eye contact with both boys. 

“This is the third meal you’ve skipped in a row. Isn't it Granger?” Notts voice called out, and she could tell from the swishing noise that filled the room that he had gotten to his feet. She nodded, “Plus you passed out at dinner last night?” She nodded again. She looked up towards him, and he was currently bent down digging into his bag. _How did he know she was skipping meals?_ When he came back up he had a couple of different things in his hand. A small pack of sugar quills, a banana, and a small pouch of chocolate galleons. He brought them over and handed them to her. As she was staring at the offerings she didn't notice that Malfoy had brought over his apple, she looked up with eyes wide in shock as he handed it to her as well. 

“Eat,” Malfoy retreated back to his seat and leaned his head back, eyes closed. 

“Thank you,” she tried to blink back the tears that had filled her eyes .

“No worries,” Nott said as he laid back on the couch. “Just don't yell at me again for at least a week and we will call it even.” She let out a small laugh and hummed her agreement as she began to eat the banana. 

“So, you can cast a Patronus Charm?” Malfoy asked, his eyes still closed. 

Hermione let out a frustrated huff, “Yes.” She said through clenched teeth. After taking a couple of calming deep breaths she took another bite of the banana and then banished the peal with a flourish of her wand. She then grabbed one of the chocolate galleons and popped it into her mouth. She wondered if this was what he meant about his nice points being used up. If he was going back to the ways she remembered him, foul name calling and all. But, nothing more was said for several minutes. She spent that time slowly eating the galleons and enjoying the rich flavor as they melted in her mouth.

“Good!” Malfoy said, so suddenly she jumped slightly in her chair as he slapped his hands on his legs and then stood up, “Think you could teach me?” She finally looked him in the face. Grey eyes stared back at her. She looked into them expecting to see some kind of hint at his malicious intentions but was instead greeted with hope. He stood patiently as he twirled his wand between his fingers similar to the way one might twirl a drumstick during a rock concert. He had the chance to earn his wands loyalties back from Harry at the end of the war, and was happily moving the hawthorn wood in between his fingers gracefully. 

“I mean, that’s what Flitwick is doing right now,” She said, as she stood and rubbed her hands on her robes. If he was willing to ask for help from her of all people, she would be damned if she would deny him it.

“He’s worried he won't be able to cast one.” Nott said as he too stood, stretching his hands over his head. Hermione tried not to stare at his stomach as his shirt rode up, but her eyes lingered on the skin that had otherwise remained hidden from her eyes. Stretched and taught against his stomach, it was a pretty pale with a slight pink just below the surface. She thought for a moment she might have seen the edge of a scar, and wondered just how far it wound up under that shirt...She quickly looked away blushing when she realized what she was doing, only to receive a knowing smirk from Malfoy. 

“Why wouldn't you be able to cast it? You are a perfectly capable wizard. You both are.” 

“Thanks for that sentiment Granger, but unfortunately I happen to have a really fucked up piece of darkness permanently etched into my skin, and seeing as this magic is supposed to be the epitome of pure light, my magic might be too corrupted to produce one.” Hermione was shaking her head before Malfoy had finished speaking. 

“You should be able too. Snape could.” She said grabbing her wand. 

“He could?” Nott asked as he pulled his wand out of the back pocket of his trousers. 

“Yea, it matched Harry’s mum’s.” With a wave of her wand she pushed the chairs up and against the wall as Nott did the same with the end table giving them a small space to work in. She walked up next to Malfoy so they were standing shoulder to shoulder. She raised her wand and he raised his. “Don't be over flourishing with the wand movements. This is not a spell that is about being fancy like levitation. It's about being precise, and like most protection it is simplistic and about intentions. You need to believe that this spell will save you, or more importantly someone you love.” She looked up at Nott who was watching them, and he slowly stepped to her other side and raised his wand too. His arm brushed slightly against hers. She felt her cheeks heat slightly at the contact and cleared her throat before continuing. 

“A strong happy memory is usually good enough to fill you with the joy that is needed to cast the spell. Any happy memory should work as long as it is a powerful one, but I’ve found that if it has someone you love in it, it makes it slightly easier. Malfoy, this is not me trying to get personal, but I know you love your mum. Try to pick one with her. Before the war. Maybe when you were a child...I really don't know, but something along those lines.” She glanced at Nott and shrugged. He nodded, indicating that she was on the right track with Malfoy. 

“The incantation needs to be said with emotion in the voice. It's not just words, it's you protecting what you love from a dark force. Like how _Expelliarmus_ works better when you are mad at the person.” Malfoy nodded, a determined look on his face. He said the incantation, but nothing happened. He twisted his wand in his hand adjusting his grip, saying the spell a second time, but yet again nothing happened. “It took Harry a long time to get it too. It took me days. We can work on it here if you want.” She offered after a fifth time of the incantation not working. He looked a little defeated but nodded his head. 

“Speaking of Charms,” Nott said as he moved away, “You missed the end of class, we have an essay due next week. 10 inches on the uses of the Patronus Charm. We will be working on it again on Friday.” She let out an audible groan. 

“Pansy is such a...such a-” She tried to find a word, but all the ones that seemed to fit into what she was trying to say were not part of her normal vocabulary. 

“Bint?” 

“Bitch?” 

Hermione smiled at the boy's helpful suggestions and chuckled as she threw herself down onto the couch. “Is it weird that we are sitting here...together?” She asked. 

“A little,” Nott said as he sat down next to her, “but to be fair, I was never a prat to you.” She smiled up at him as she tucked her feet under her. He gave Malfoy a stern look, and Malfoy rubbed his hand over the back of his neck and through his hair, ruffling it a little. 

“Yeah, about that Granger,” He made eye contact with her again, before wandlessly summoning a chair and sitting down directly in front of her, his elbows resting on his knees. “I am actually really sorry for the way I behaved. I was in a bad way, and I just couldn't get out from under my parents idiotic ideals. Though, I will say that you proved their teachings wrong at every turn.” She nodded and stared at him for a few minutes with questions racing through her mind. Should she really be doing this? She thought back to every time Malfoy had called her something cruel or made fun of the way she looked. It was several times, too many to actually count. Yet, here she was sitting with him and feeling better than she had all day, because these boys respected her and had given her food for no other reason other than to be nice and make her feel better.

Whoever Malfoy was in the past it wasn't who he was at this moment with her, and she had a feeling that the Malfoy staring at her with remorse in his pale grey eyes was the real Malfoy. Not who his parents wanted him to be. So, summoning the courage that Gryffindors clung too when they were faced with something that scared them she took a deep breath and stuck her hand out. “Hi, I am Hermione Granger,” She smiled and waited. 

He stared out at her hand for a couple seconds before taking it tentatively and giving it a small shake, “Hello Hermione Granger, I am Draco Malfoy.” He offered her a small grin. 

“I am a Muggleborn, do you have a problem with that?” 

“No.”

“Well then, it is a pleasure to officially meet you, Malfoy.” He broke out into a genuine smile which lit up his face making him seem young. Which when she thought about it they all were. It was strange to think that in less than two decades of life, the three people currently in this room had fought a war. They had fought a war and had _survived_. She just hoped, as she flicked her gaze back to the fire, that the rest of the school would be able to move forward and find peace with who they once called enemies like she could.


	8. Walks and Thimbletons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating)

They stayed in the room for most of the night studying together in a companable silence, the only noise being the crackle of the flames as the sun slowly sank below the horizon outside. Occasionally, one of them would make a joke which would cause the other two to laugh, or would ask a question that would be promptly and easily answered by the others. It was refreshing to Hermione to have study partners that were just as invested in doing well as she was. If this continued she could see this being one of the best years yet, and could see herself doing exceptionally well in each course. 

Eventually, Malfoy stood from his chair and stretched running hands down his rib cage. “Well, as strange as this has been I need to go to bed. I'm pretty sure Blaise will freak out if im any later than I already am.” 

Shocked from her potions text Hermione grabbed her wand and cast a quick _Tempus_ charm. When the numbers appeared before them she let out a shocked gasp. 2:45. “Tell me I miscast that spell,” She groaned. 

“Afraid not, Granger.” Nott mumbled as he ran his hands down his face and rubbed the back of his neck. “Time flies when you are having fun, isn't that the muggle saying?” He stood and shoved his Defense Against the Dark Arts text into his bag, slinging it over his shoulder. Hermione nodded in agreement stifling a yawn. “Alright Draco you first,” Nott motioned to the door before looking back at Hermione who was staring at him with a bemused expression on her face. “What?”

“I’ve just never heard someone call him Draco like that,” she said holding back a small grin.

“Believe it or not Granger that is my name.” Malfoy said as he gathered up the papers he had left on the desk, his ruffled blond hair reflecting the fire light causing his head to be ringed in gold light. 

“True, but you call me Granger.”

“Yeah, well you haven't known me since I was young enough to cry every time I scraped my knee. Besides, Theo only calls me that when he's tired _or_ emotionally distressed. But seeing as it's almost three in the morning, I'm going to put my galleons on tired.” Malfoy moved towards the door. Before he opened it he glanced back over his shoulder, “Tomorrow Granger?”

“Yeah, I’ll be here. Think about more memories to try,” she yawned again shoving her gifted sugar quills into her bag. With a nod he left through the door leaving the two heads of houses standing alone in the room. 

“Ok, lets go to bed.” Theo said as he opened the door to their common room. They gave each other small smiles as they parted ways, each heading to their own beds. 

* * *

The next morning Hermione woke up running late. Before she left she had enough of a sound mind to grab a calming draught, just in case she needed it during the day. She wanted to be prepared if she had another incident like the first night. She was happy to notice that it seemed to be a good day and her emotions remained in check as she plopped herself down unceremoniously next to Harry and Ron at the Gryffindor table.

“‘Mione, where were you last night? We waited outside your common room for like an hour and you never showed up. So we checked the library and Madam Pince said she hadn’t seen you in hours.” Ron complained through a brief moment when he didn't have food hanging out of his mouth. 

“I was helping someone with some homework,” trying to deflect, she grabbed a plate and put some fresh fruit on it, grinning as she grabbed a banana and a green apple and put them in her bag to give to the Slytherins later that night. 

“Who?” Ginny innocently asked as she ran her hand through Harry’s messy hair. 

“Malfoy,” Hermione said simply. She put some sausages on her plate and started buttering dry toast. She noticed that all conversation in her vicinity stopped and glanced up to see everyone staring at her. “What!?!” She asked loudly enough that even conversation from nearby tables halted. She quickly glanced around, and saw two sets of eyes looking at her curiously from the Slytherin table. She blushed slightly and moved her gaze back to the Gryffindor eighth years who were currently looking at her with concern on their faces. 

“Um...did you just say Malfoy?” Ron asked, his face turning a violent shade of puce. 

“Yeah, what about it?”

“Oh nothing, other than the fact that means you were alone with a known Death Eater!” His voice was starting to raise, and the hall around them was getting quiet. 

“He was acquitted, we all spoke at his trial,” She said, matching his tone, “And I wasn't alone with him Nott was there.” Ron scoffed as she finished. He then stood up and leaned forward on the table. 

“So you were with another snake. That doesn't make it any better. You know they were probably thinking of ways to make you miserable this whole time. How could you be so **STUPID** ‘Mione?” The last sentence dripped with more venom than he had used since the war. 

“Calm down, mate.” Harry who had remained quiet up until this point looked over at his red headed friend with warning flashing in his eyes. While Ron and Harry were best friends, everyone knew that Harry had become like a brother to Hermione. Ever since Ron had left them alone in the Forest of Dean during the Horcrux hunt, Hermione and Harry had grown closer to the point of being their own family. They had relied on each other and had bonded in a way that most people didn’t understand. Harry was still a little oblivious to obvious signals of distress, but it was kind of hard to ignore someone screaming at Hermione over breakfast. 

“Calm down!?! She keeps putting herself in harm's way. Do I need to remind you what happened to her at his house?” Hermione was shaking now, her breathing starting to weaken as flashes of a dagger piercing her skin filled her vision, and the cackling of an evil witch echoed through her mind. She quickly dug through her bag and grabbed the calming draught and downed the small vial in one gulp. 

Before it took effect she glared at the red head, but he didn't seem deterred. “And Nott!?! Are you seriously that daft? He was probably right behind his daddy as that man tortured muggleborns for fun. That's what you are to them Hermione, a piece of muggleborn rubbish.”

“They don't need to be reminded of what happened there and neither do I. Believe it or not Malfoy apologized to me, and I accepted. I don't blame him and neither should you! If he hadn't been at the Manor Harry and I would have been dead or worse. And Nott has never said a single mean thing to me which is more than I can say about you!”

He flinched a little at her words but didn't back down, so she stood up and leaned across the table so there was no more than an inch between their faces. His hot breath hit her face in quick succession leaving behind a sticky feeling. “Listen closely Ronald Weasley because I'm not going to say this again. I can take care of myself, I don't need _you_ to be my protector.” She turned on her heel and chanced a glance back at the Slytherin table just in time to see a flash of blond hair pushing through the crowds of the Great Hall, black hair flowing closely as they left through the doors. She quickly gathered her bag and hurried after the figures. 

Unfortunately, she wasn't able to find them before her first class of the day was called into session. After ten minutes of rushing through the corridors calling their names she decided that she would at least see them in DADA, and talk to them there. Her stomach growled because she had once again skipped a meal and now that the draught was working she didn't have the twisting in her stomach that usually prevented her from wanting food. 

Deciding that she would just have to eat lunch in her common room after class she turned on her heel and started heading down the halls quickly, unruly hair flowing behind her as she rushed towards Arithmancy. She worked her way through the castle, her head buried into her schedule again trying to find time to work on her potions and herbology project. Her luck seemed to be getting better because as she rounded the final corner into the classroom she saw two familiar heads of hair sitting at a table towards the back of the room. 

Feeling a little better since the fight less than twenty minutes prior she grabbed her pilfered fruits and laid them on the table causing the boys to look up. “I noticed your breakfast was cut short,” She said before sitting next to Nott and pulling out her parchment and ink as more students started to make their way into the classroom. 

“Granger-” Malfoy started but was cut off.

“I just don't know how I'm going to find time to raise a plant from seedling to adult _and_ develop a potion using its properties,” She gave him a meaningful look and his mouth twitched as his grey eyes flicked to his apple. 

He took a quick bite chewing it thoughtfully, “You know, we could probably get Slughorn to let our duo become a trio,” he said after he swallowed his bite. 

Hermione stared at Malfoy for several seconds. Why didn't she think of that? Why didn't Harry or Ron suggest that when she was sitting alone? “Are you ok with that, Nott?” Nott’s eyes which hadn't left the table flicked up to her quickly before nodding slightly and grabbing a dark blue feathered quill with a metal nib from his bag. She pushed her ink towards him, but he just shook his head and grabbed parchment to begin taking notes. She watched in amazement as the ink flowed from the quill.

“That's amazing, is it self inking!” She asked as he wrote the date and class number at the top of his parchment. 

“Yeah,” said Malfoy as he pulled a similar quill, except his feather was green, from his robe pocket and began writing as well.

“You have no idea how many shirts that would have saved me,” She mumbled as she dipped her quill into her inkwell, and began to furiously scribble notes. Professor Vector had made her entrance and was currently going over a formula to help determine if a curse on an object was immediately harmful or had a prolonged effect. She was shocked to see that Notts notes were much more meticulous than hers, and Malfoys script was some of the most elegant she had ever seen. It was refreshing to see that she wouldn't have to help a new set of boys take notes. They stayed quiet the rest of class, all three of them furiously writing, no sound between them but the scratching of quills.

“We have Ancient Runes together Granger, want to walk with me?” Nott asked as he stood. She nodded and they began down the hall, waving to Malfoy as he left them and made his way towards his Alchemy course. Nott’s face was still bruised, but where purple puffy marks were last night, there now seemed to be more sickly green patches. 

“Your face looks awful,” She said before she could stop herself. She saw him make an amused face before turning towards her as they kept moving down the hall. His hands were jammed in his pockets as he walked gracefully next to her. 

“Thanks, Granger,” he said letting out a small laugh, “and here I thought you Gryffindors were supposed to be nice.” 

“I think you have us confused for Hufflepuffs,” she said raising her head in mock indignation, “us Gryffindors are brutally honest.” 

“Yeah, I figured that out today at breakfast,” he said his face slightly more somber. 

“Don’t let Ron get to you. He is still trying to get over everything that happened.” she said, her voice small. She felt, more than saw, him nod. They walked through the halls in silence for a couple more corridors. Their shoes made small repetitive clicking sounds on the stone floors as they made their way through the rounding passages towards Ancient Runes. It seemed like the other classes were still in session because as of that moment they were alone; but they both knew that any minute the halls would be filled with hundreds of students making their way to the second class of the day. 

“I wasn’t,” he said, when it was clear she was waiting for him to elaborate he let out a long sigh, “I wasn’t in the room when my father...when my father did what he did.” His head was still staring at the floor. Hermione nodded and gave his arm an affectionate squeeze as the bell finally sounded and they were assaulted with the thunderous boom of hundreds of voices. They slowly made their way through the crowd and into Ancient Runes where they sat quietly next to each other and took notes until the end of class. 

“So, are you heading to lunch now?” Nott asked as he started to pack up his bag. 

“Yeah, but I think I might just eat in the common room.” 

“Well, in that case I’ll see you in Defense Against the Dark Arts, yeah?” 

She nodded to him with a small smile taking over her face. She watched him walk down the hall, his dark figure disappearing amongst the crowd of other students all making their way towards the Great Hall. She couldn't explain the strange twinge she felt in her gut as he left her standing there. She rolled her eyes and started to make her way against the stream of people towards her dorm. If she was honest with herself she had actually hoped he would join her for lunch. Nott had always been a quiet person, but she noticed that he was relatively pleasant to be around, and made jokes that were sometimes immature and sometimes kind of geeky. She caught herself smiling when her mind drifted to him stretching the night before, when his shirt rode up. Feeling stupid she shook her head, and focused on moving her way through the crowd.

She was so busy trying to politely push through that she didn't notice the dark haired witch until it was too late. Two pale hands reached out and shoved her hard enough that she was now sitting on her arse in the middle of the hallway. “Watch it, Mudblood.” Pansy sneered as she stepped over her and kept walking down the hall, flanked on either side by the Greengrass sisters who were both laughing. 

“Hermione are you ok?” A soft voice floated down to her as small strong hands grabbed her arm and helped her stand.

“Yeah, thanks Luna.” 

“No problem. I think Pansy got bit by a Thimbleton last night.” Luna’s pale blue eyes stared at Hermione as Hermione started to guide her towards the window so they weren't standing in the middle of the still crowded hall. 

“A Thimbleton?”

“Yeah, they are small beetle-like creatures that crawl in your bed at night, and put you in a foul mood the next day.” Luna explained as she sat on the ledge of the open window letting the breeze blow her long pale tresses back from her face. Hermione stared at her for a moment before wondering if Thimbletons had anything to do with a muggle saying about bed bugs, but quickly dismissed the thought and perched herself next to the dreamy Ravenclaw. 

“Oh, well that’s probably what it was. Did you have a chance to make the first schedule for rounds?” Hermione pulled her hair into a small ribbon so the wind wouldn't make too many knots in her already unmanageable mane. 

“Oh yes. I gave it to the other prefects as well. Calvin helped me yesterday in the library,” Luna began digging in her bag and handed Hermione a small piece of parchment, “you have rounds tonight, you have to do rounds alone though, that was the only way I could work it out. I was going to give you the schedule today at lunch, but since we bumped into each other…” Luna trailed off as she stared outside. 

“Yeah, lucky that.” Hermione said. They sat there for a couple of more minutes before Hermione noticed a familiar head of dark hair moving across the grounds and towards the Forbidden Forest. 

“Luna, is that Nott?”

“Theo? Oh yes, he always goes into the forest after lunch.” Trying to hide her astonishment at Luna for using his first name, Hermione looked at the blond witch again. 

“Why?”

“That's really not for me to say, anyway see you later Hermione.” With that the Ravenclaw bounced up from her spot and skipped towards the Great Hall, rainbow socks peeking out from beneath her robes. 

Hermione stayed where she was and waited. Almost a full hour later she saw his figure emerge from the Forbidden Forest and walk up towards the castle, his body pushed forward so he could fight the wind, robe billowing out behind him and hands shoved deep in his pockets. Without looking up, he made his way through the doors and out of Hermione's site. This new discovery fueled her curiosity towards the Slytherin who had taken up residence in her mind.


	9. DADA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> Hope you enjoy this Bonus chapter. It is in thanks of all the wonderful comments I have received. I hope this continues and I am so happy so many folks have enjoyed my story

Hermione’s study session went by relatively quickly, which she found she shared with Neville and Ginny. She helped a couple of second year Hufflepuffs that were part of her group find a few books to help them write a potions essay. She also found that as long as the Slytherins were separated and alone they all tended to be relatively nice to her. This was especially true for a seventh year named David Travers. He was relatively goofy and made a couple of jokes that made everyone at their tables laugh, earning them more than one scathing look from Madam Pince. 

By the end of the study session Hermione was in much better spirits. She made her way down to the Defense against the Dark Arts class with a smile on her face. As she approached the group who were waiting outside the classroom she spotted Harry and Ron. She hesitated briefly in the hall, but when Harry gave her a smile she approached them confidently. 

“Hermione! We missed you at lunch,” Harry said, giving her an unexpected and quick hug. She returned it easily, happy that he seemed to have decided to ignore the situation at breakfast. 

“Yeah, I got distracted by something. Is that Justin?” Hermione asked as she watched a group of Hufflepuffs approach and stand with the other eighth years. 

“Yeah, it turns out that DADA is going to be completely inter house for the eighth years since so many....well since we lost so many.” Hermione watched as a guilty look crossed Harry's face and wrapped her arm around him, giving it a reassuring squeeze. 

“I knew that's why we were sharing classes with the seventh years, I just figured that DADA would be the same.”

“I think since DADA was used more than any other type of magic during the war they didn't want accomplished eighth years competing with the younger students.” Ron said, a frown plastered to his face as he stared at the Slytherins who were standing away from everyone else. Hermione noticed Nott and Malfoy standing in the back of the group having a hushed conversation, when they glanced up at her they both gave her a small nod in recognition which she returned. 

Eventually, everyone filed into the classroom and found their seats. Harry and Ron convinced her to sit in the middle of the room as they waited for their professor to make his way into the class. They didn't have to wait long, as they all settled into their seats, the door that led to the professor's office flung open and their professor stood at the top of the balcony, reminiscent of the way Professor Lockheart used too. This professor seemed younger than McGregor, his dark brown hair was messy and he had a pair of glasses that seemed to make his brown eyes slightly larger than would be normal. He was tall and lanky, but there was clear defined muscle beneath his robes. 

“Good afternoon witches and wizards! Welcome to Defense Against the Dark Arts. My name is Daniel Jacobson, and I am here to broaden your minds and prepare you for the possible future in which you need to need to do battle against a dark wizard...wait no….you’ve already done that!” A couple of students let out weak chuckles. The Professor jumped over the top of the balcony and landed heavily on his desk which was positioned just below it. 

“I see we have students here from every house which means we are finally at the end of the day. Thank Merlin.” A couple more students laughed. “I don't know about you, but I am ready for dinner.”

“Damn right,” Ronald called out from his seat in the middle of the room. 

“Exactly Mr. Weasley. Damn right,” A couple of students stared at the professor with wide eyes, wondering if their ears had failed them or if this professor had indeed just swore in front of them. 

“You know me?”

“Not at all,” Professor Jacobson's face spread into a lopsided grin, “but your brother Charlie, now there's a fellow I know. I’ve worked in Romania for the past 8 years studying dragons, which was my dream right out of Hogwarts. I was their resident Magi-Zoologist. Who can tell me why a Magi-Zoologist is qualified to teach you young folks about Defense?” They all stayed quiet. After what felt like forever Hermione rolled her eyes and raised her hand. While she was still trying to ignore answering questions overall, she was getting tired of the lingering silence. 

“Yes, Miss…”

“Granger, Sir, and a Magi-Zoologist is not qualified to teach us about Defense.” She stated factually. The professor's eyes glittered as he sat on the desk, his legs dangling. The entire class stared shocked at Hermione. Many wondered if she was going to have yet _another_ screaming match with a professor. 

“Miss Granger, you wound me.” he placed a hand over his heart as if she had shot him. “Care to elaborate on why someone as unqualified as myself would be hired here then?” He asked. 

“Of course Professor Jacobson-”

“Dan please. That goes for the rest of you lot as well. None of that professor nonsense.” 

“ _Dan_ …” Hermione began again, slightly uncomfortable with speaking a professor's given name, “You are qualified not _because_ of being a Magi-Zoologist, but because of _where_ you were a Magi-Zoologist.”

“Correct! Ten points to Gryffindor.” He said excitedly as he clapped his hands together. “Let's hear from someone else, another house all together. Why does it matter where I was a Magi-Zoologist.” He stalked around. Eventually he settled next to the Slytherins. “Alright vipers let's hear it. Why does it matter?” He didn't say this rudely, there was a playful manner to his tone, almost like he genuinely wanted the Slytherins to participate. Hermione could respect that he was making an effort to include the students, as most teachers had been ignoring them so far. 

“Dragons are inherently magical creatures,” Nott began. This was one of the first times she had heard him speak in class. There was an air of confidence to his voice, like he knew that he was correct which was slightly overlaid with boredom. She looked back at him, and saw he was leaned back in his chair, balancing on the back legs of it. 

“Go on Lord Nott.” Dan said as he waited excitedly next to him. 

“Just Nott please, don't want to hear any of that Lord nonsense,” Nott said returning the professors earlier lopsided grin, “Dragons have a magic inside them, that's why we can use their heartstrings in wands,” he waved his wand for emphasis, “beings with that much power tend to attract dark nasties, so you would have had to catalogue and deal with a number of them pretty regularly, I suspect.” 

“Definitely, vampires were a right nasty problem! Ten points to Slytherin.” At this point students' eyes were glued to their new professor. With a wave of his wand all the desks they were sitting at disappeared, and any parchment or ink that was on the table hovered waiting for its owners to collect them. 

“Now that my qualifications have been verified, we are going to be doing a warm up class period. We are going to do some basic dueling so I can see where everyone is at skill level wise. Everyone pair up-” When voices erupted from around him as everyone tried to get their friends to pair with them; a small smile spread across the professor's face and he held up his hand, “And not with someone from your own house! Let's mix and match.” The room went dead silent. 

“Oh come now, it's not so bad. You do realize that you can be friends with someone from another house don't you!” Slowly the students started getting up, trying to find someone from a different house that they felt comfortable enough to duel. 

“Potter, want to duel?” A familiar drawl sounded, and Hermione turned to see a small playful smirk on Malfoy's face. 

“You’re on,” Harry said standing and walking over to him. 

“Ron, want to partner up?” Justin Finch-Fletchy came around the corner to ask. Ron nodded and went to stand with him. Hermione glanced around and saw Cho Chang standing alone. They made eye contact and both gave a small smile, a silent understanding that they would partner. Once everyone was partnered the students lined up opposite to their other halves. Hermione noticed that Nott was partnered with Seamus, and Seamus had a smug look on his face as he raised his wand and took aim.

“Ok, first things first, I know typical duels would be anything goes but here we will not be allowing any dark curses. If someone does feel like a dark curse was thrown I will be reviewing the offenders wand to guarantee they were or were not. If one was cast the offender will be serving detention from now until the end of the school year. Next, keep it civil. There will be no name calling, or rude gestures allowed here in my class. A duel will be decided when the first person is knocked to the ground or stunned. If any spells are thrown after a person is incapacitated or disarmed, you will lose house points, have to write a 12 inch essay, and will be required to serve 2 weeks detention. Sound good? Alright, three...two...one begin.” All students bowed to their opponents as he set up small shields in between each couple to prevent a rogue spell from hitting anyone else, and the students began their duel.

Hermione remembered Cho from Dumbledore's Army. and did her best to counter the young Ravenclaws typical style. It was clear that Cho was out matched long before the fight was over, but Hermione gave her ample chance to get back into the swing of throwing offensive spells keeping her _Protego_ shield up. This was a lot easier with her new wand then with her old vinewood, as she had learned that Rowan wands favored protective spells. After a few minutes of counters and shielding Hermione decided to go on the offensive. 

She threw a body-bind curse, followed by a couple of minor hexes that would down Cho, but she blocked them before ducking under and releasing a strong _Stupefy_ . Hermione easily countered the stun, and watched as the bright red light was reabsorbed into the shield. Hermione followed that up with two nonverbal stupefies. Cho blocked the first, but the second caught her off guard, and she fell to the floor unconscious. Hermione then went over to Cho, and cast a quick _Revivify._ Cho gasped back to life and accepted Hermione's offered hand to stand. The pair then stood in their bubble of shields watching the rest of the pairs. 

Ron had easily defeated Justin, and helped him stand. Dean was able to beat Pansy, but did not revive her and just left her on the floor unconscious. When Dean noticed Hermione looking at him, he shrugged his shoulders and gave a smirk which made his dark eyes sparkle. Hermione rolled her eyes at him and mouthed a silent ‘thank you’. Seamus was currently being helped up off the floor by Nott and it looked like they were both smiling, while Nott gave the Irishman a strong pat on the shoulder. Soon the only two left dueling were Malfoy and Harry. The professor eventually released the shield bubbles around the finished students and extended the shields around Harry and Malfoy to allow them more movement. 

It was really quite the spectacle, Harry's dueling style was like that of a cat. Quick fast movements that aimed to weaken the opponent and end the fight as early as possible. This aggressive style had won Harry a lot of duels, including the one against the Dark Lord. Malfoy was a lot more subdued. Waiting defensively until his opponent weakened from the spells they were casting before throwing out a few well timed curses to try and disarm or disable his opponent. What Malfoy couldn’t account for was the stamina that years of fighting had granted Harry. Harry was very difficult to tire out during a duel and it was becoming more evident the longer the match lasted. 

Eventually, Harry was able to get past Malfoys shield and the last duel ended as a stunning spell burst forth from Harry's wand, clipping Malfoy on the shoulder. Everyone waited as they stared at blond laying on the ground. The savior of the wizarding world went up to his opponent and long time rival offering his hand. Malfoy accepted it and was pulled up to face a laughing and smiling Harry who looked like he had just had more fun than he had in ages.

“Very good class. That will be all for today, but next Tuesday we will officially begin our lessons. Enjoy your weekend, and will someone please revive that poor girl on the floor before she catches a cold.” With those final words from their professor the class left for dinner, having felt like they released some much needed tension and energy between each other and the other houses. 


	10. Happiness and Observations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ITS WEDNESDAY MY DUDES!
> 
> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> A/N2: It was brought to my attention that Cho Chang is technically a year older than the Golden Trio. Unfortunately I am human and I did make a mistake...but seeing as this is already a AU I am going to just say that she is in the same year as them instead of rewriting that scene. Sound good to everyone? Yes? Great!
> 
> Hope everyone enjoys this next chapter and see you on Sunday!

Hermione walked with Harry and Ron to the dining hall, all giving each other play-by-plays of their duels. Hermione was enjoying the walk because Harry was the most happy she had seen him without Ginny attached to his arm in months. He wasn’t even insulting Malfoy, and if one listened to the conversation they would actually hear compliments thrown at the Slytherin Prince.

“He has definitely improved since we last went at it,” Harry continued as they sat at the table and began to grab some food. Hermione grinned slightly as she pulled some roasted vegetables onto her plate and began poking them with her fork. 

“Who?” Ginny asked after kissing Harry lightly on the cheek. 

“Malfoy, I dueled him in DADA. It was-just wow you know? To be able to show my skills without fearing for my life.” He trailed off as he grabbed a chicken wing from the center and began to eat. 

“I know what you mean,” Seamus joined in after piling on food to his plate. “Nott was really skilled too, and after he won the duel he actually helped me up. Told me I did a good job,” Seamus shifted forward slightly so he could look down the table at Hermione, “Maybe you were right Hermione.” Ron scoffed from where he was sitting on Hermione’s right hand side.

“You are all being tempted by the snakes. They haven't changed.” He huffed as he started shoveling food down his throat like a starving man. 

“We could always... _ persuade  _ them to tell us if they have or not.” Ginny said as she took a drink of her pumpkin juice. 

“What do you mean Gin?” The red head was currently wearing a smirk that reminded Hermione a little too much of her twin brothers. 

“Well….we could invite them for a game of Wizards Truth or Dare. I happen to have the latest serum from George's shop. Says that it's almost as strong as veritaserum but without the pain.” She suggested raising her eyebrows at the Gryffindors. 

“No.” 

“No ‘Mione? Scared to learn the truth?” Ron’s face burst out into a smug grin.

“Not at all, I just don’t think it is right to ask them to play if we only want to use it as an excuse to reveal foul deeds.” She replied as she poked more at the vegetables on her plate, her hair falling in front of her. She couldn’t help the tight feeling that erupted into her chest. She felt like she needed to defend Malfoy and Nott against her housemates. 

“Don’t think of it like that,” Ginny said, pulling out a piece of parchment. “Think of it as if we are proving innocence. If anything it will get them off of Ron's radar.” She quickly scribbled a note and began to quickly fold the parchment.

“Gin. Don't you dare,” Hermione tried to grab the page, but before her slender fingers closed over the yellowed parchment, Ginny pulled out her wand and cast a quick  _ Destina.  _ The small paper airplane took to the sky and flew over to the Slytherin table where Hermione watched it hover right in front of Malfoy. He looked up from his conversation with Blaise Zabini and locked eyes with the Gryffindors who were all watching him expectantly. Grabbing the plane from the air, he unfolded the note and read the page. Once finished one pale eyebrow raised in amusement as he showed it to Nott and Blaise. They both read over the parchment, had a quick discussion, and then all nodded in agreement towards the still staring Gryffindors.

“What did your note say?” Asked Neville who had been quiet up until this point. 

“Well, I just suggested we all meet up to play and drink Saturday night after Quidditch tryouts. I told them they could invite whoever they wanted.” Gin said as she dug into her plate with enough gusto to match her brother. 

“And where exactly are we supposed to play?” Hermione asked irritatedly. 

Ginny’s eyes lit up with mischief, as her smile got so big it nearly showed all of her teeth.“Your common room of course.” 

* * *

“What exactly are the Gryffindorks up to Granger?” Asked Malfoy in Rowena’s Study later that night. 

“Oh you know, just trying to prove the dastardly plans of you scary Slytherins.” She said as she tried to cast her Patronus. After two attempts she eventually shook her head and threw her wand down onto one of the chairs. 

“Dastardly indeed. I’m busy trying to corrupt their princess,” Nott said as he watched them both from the desk, currently working on their potions assignment. Malfoy and Hermione were faced away from him trying to conjure their spells. 

“Right, corrupt me how? Keeping me out late to study,” Hermione grinned at him over her shoulder. He looked up from his parchment before giving her a small wink.

“Out late _with_ two sneaky Slytherins. You are already more corrupt than you think.” He said. The way he said the words, and the low tone of his voice caused a shiver to race down her spine and a flush to creep up her cheeks. She quickly looked away from him and back towards Malfoy.

“ _ Expecto Patronum _ .” Malfoy tried again. “I’m telling you I can't cast this bloody spell.” he let out a frustrated noise before conjuring a small bouncy ball and bouncing it against the wall; catching it before repeating the process. He had been trying to cast the spell for over an hour with only an occasional smokey wisp to show for it. Hermione could tell he was losing hope. 

“Ok, new plan.” She declared before running out of the room. The door opened directly into the head common room, and Hermione hurried to her bedroom before rummaging through her trunk. Having found what she was looking for she let out a triumphant squeal and then ran back to the library. 

Throwing open the door to the study room she noticed that Nott and Malfoy were currently both standing at the desk talking in hushed voices. Once she entered the room their discussion stopped and they eyed her curiously. “What the bloody hell is that, Granger?” Malfoy asked, eyebrows raised as a worried look covered his face.

“This is my stereo. I can only get a few hours of music each year before it shorts out from the magic here at Hogwarts and I have to buy a new one, but it's worth it.” When they both still looked at her confused, she sighed and clarified, “It's a muggle device.” She shoved the batteries inside it before selecting a CD. The chairs had already been moved when they started casting spells again, so she picked one of her favorite guilty pleasure songs ‘The one and only’ by Chesney Hawkes. 

Once the opening beats sounded she started swaying her hips and dancing in her most ridiculous fashion. Both boys were looking at her wide eyed as she danced around the room, until she eventually walked over and grabbed each of them by the hand and started dancing more feverishly until they both started laughing at her. Emboldened, she grabbed Malfoys hands and started pulling both from side to side forcing his chest to move from side to side until he started wiggling on his own with the beat. Once he was dancing, she moved and did the same to Nott until he was as well. She didn't let go of Nott’s hand as they kept going with the beat of the song. 

They were all laughing at each other dancing and eventually the stuck up pure bloods started creating new goofy dance moves to compete with Hermione for most outlandish. They danced through the first song and onto the next, and then onto the next. She looked up occasionally and saw large smiles gracing both their faces. A fleeting thought crossed her mind as she wondered how often these boys got the chance to act silly and just have fun. How many times were they allowed to be foolish or crazy at home? But the thought eventually disappeared into the chords of the song as she tried to keep up with two boys who were dancing as if they had no cares at all.

Eventually, Nott sent her spinning out from his body and let go of her hand where Malfoy grabbed her up. Malfoy started dancing with her at a fast pace bouncing on the balls of his feet, occasionally dipping them both towards the ground side-ways so they had to balance on one foot before bringing them back up to stand. The pure bloods were definitely better dancers than Ron and Harry and they kept her from tripping over her feet. She never thought graceful and goofy would go so well together, but both Slytherins exhibited it with ease. 

Once the CD ended, Hermione grabbed hold of Malfoy by placing a hand on each side of his face, “Now Draco, cast it now!” 

Staring at her with confused wide eyes he grabbed his wand and said the incantation slightly breathlessly. “ _ Expecto Patronum, _ ” Hermione held her breath as a silvery magic erupted from the end of his wand, and began to take form. The room was bathed in the bright white light of a spectral snow leopard, who stood proud and stared at the students all trying to gather their breath from their impromptu dance. “I...I-did it.” Draco stuttered out as he held the magic. 

Hermione laughed in celebration and was about to congratulate him when her vision filled with black spots and she felt overcome with a dizzy spell. Placing her hand on her forehead she reached out to try and find something to grab as her knees gave out. The last she heard was a concerned, “Granger,” from Nott before she collapsed to the floor. 

She awoke not two minutes later to both Slytherins staring down at her, “You alright there, Granger?” asked Nott as he stood above her. She could vaguely feel that they had moved her to the couch, and gave him a small nod before sitting up and holding her head in her hands. 

“What happened?” she asked weakly. 

“Well, I ran a diagnostic spell on you and it told me you haven't eaten anything since the fruit we gave you yesterday. Tell me that my wand malfunctioned and I need to buy a new one,” Nott said as he stared down at her. His face was an emotionless mask as he waited for her to answer. When her silence seemed like enough of an answer he threw his hands in the air. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. I thought you were going to eat lunch in the dorm.”

“You were at dinner, how did Potter not notice you not eating?” Malfoy asked softly. Hermione dropped her eyes to her lap before giving a small shrug. She hated to admit that she had been wondering the same thing for months. Neither of her best friends had noticed how little she ate at meals recently. Neither seemed to notice that her anxiety caused her to go through periods and days when food lost all appeal, or that in the months that she had been back from being on the run she had barely gained any weight back. 

“I dont- They have more important things to worry about right now. Harry has his auror partnership and Ginny. I don't want to burden him with this, not after he has been through so much. Ron...he has lost Fre-” Her voice hitched and she shook her head trying to clear the flashes of the ever-smirking red-headed twin that tried to invade her mind, “they don’t need to worry about me. They have more important things going on.” She finished, but the defense felt weak even to her ears. It didn't matter though, it was the same thing she had been telling herself for months. They had lost and sacrificed so much more than she had, and she had no room to complain or ask for help. They needed her to be strong for them. So, she would. She would be strong and hide her anxiety attacks, and loss of appetite. Even if she didn’t have to try to hide it very hard because her friends were already so distracted.

Nott released a growl and started digging through his bag again. When he couldn't find what he was looking for fast enough he dumped all the contents on the floor, causing Hermione to grimace as several textbooks fell on their bindings. “Mate, calm down, she's fine.” Draco tried, but Nott shot him a glare that caused Draco to raise his hands in defeat and back away so he was standing next to the fireplace. 

Nott grabbed a box of chocolates from where it had fallen amongst the assorted items of his bag and shoved it at Hermione. “Eat this.” He said through clenched teeth as he grabbed his wand, and cast a spell to clean up his bag. Hermione briefly wondered why he didn't  _ accio  _ the chocolates, but she also knew that sometimes when you were upset you didn't think clearly so she let it go. What she couldn't understand was why Nott was so upset about her not eating. It's not like he had any stock in her, and honestly what was it to him if she starved herself? Not wanting to incur the wrath of the blue-eyed boy she opened the package and popped a chocolate in her mouth. They were soft and chewy, and delicious. But what else could you expect from Honeydukes Premium Chocolates?

“Has anyone seen my wand?” She asked passively. Both boys did a quick scan of the room before Draco found it hiding behind one of the chairs. He took a couple of seconds and looked at it strangely, turning it over in his hands before raising an eyebrow at her in question. “I had to get a new one…my other one…” she trailed off trying to give him a meaningful look. He seemed to understand because his eyes dropped to the floor as he handed it to her. 

Casting a quick  _ Tempus _ , and groaned aloud when she saw it was 9:55. “I have to go on rounds,” she said as she stood up. Before she got very far Nott put a strong hand on her shoulder and pushed her back down. 

“Forget it, you are not going anywhere until you eat at least three more of those sweets; and then I am going to take you to get food from the kitchens. Malfoy, go to the Slytherin common room and tell Avery to take Granger's rounds. If he has anything negative to say about it tell him I’ll deal with him like I did Goyle.” Draco nodded stiffly turning towards the door. Before he walked through it he hesitated before turning back around and crossing the room to where Hermione was sitting, currently chewing on salty caramel chocolates.

“Thanks Granger,” He said stiffly before giving her shoulder a squeeze. With that he walked out of the room. 

It was quiet after the door shut behind Draco. The only sound was the occasional crinkle of the chocolate wrappings as she popped another of the candies into her mouth. Nott had taken to staring at the fire, his brow occasionally furrowing in thought. Desperate to break the silence Hermione spoke.

“So,  _ Lord  _ Nott huh?” Hermione tried. He turned his head slightly towards her but did not face her completely. He closed his eyes and let out a tired sigh. 

“Technically, yes. I asked Professor McGonagall to tell them not to call me that, but apparently  _ Dan  _ didn't get the memo,” Hermione let out a small giggle at the emphasis he put on their new professor's insistence to call them by his first name. 

“In other words you just want me to call you Nott,” She said as she tucked her feet under her. 

“If that’s what you want,” He looked over at her then. An emotion that Hermione couldn't recognize was reflected for a second in his sapphire eyes before he blinked and it disappeared. 

“Is Draco Lord Malfoy then?” She asked. Trying to keep the conversation going. 

“No. Draco won't be Lord Malfoy until he marries.”

“Then how are you Lord Nott?”

“My fathers in Azkaban.” 

“So is his-”

“My mother is dead.” His voice was low, “There is no one to keep the Manor while father is away.” The silence that filled the room was thick. She watched him carefully as he stared at the fire taking several deep breaths. When he turned back towards her he was back to his confident self. “Do you think we can make the exceptionally long trip to the kitchens,” He joked as he motioned to the door. She nodded before grabbing her bag. Before she could sling it over her shoulders Nott took it from her and placed it on the same shoulder that his bag was currently resting. 

“I can carry that,” she said impatiently. 

“I know you can, but I'm going too.” His voice left no room for argument. Hermione rolled her eyes before placing her hand on the door knob. Thinking of her intention of the Hogwarts kitchens she closed her eyes and opened the door. 


	11. Unintentional Insults

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> HAPPY SUNDAY!

Nott and Hermione ate a small meal prepared by the house elves of turkey sandwiches and crips. Once Nott was satisfied that Hermione ate enough food, and she was starving so she did eat quite a bit, he walked her back to their common room before saying goodnight and going to bed. 

The next day flew by as everyone was finally back in the regular class schedule. During charms class everyone was shocked to see Draco actually conjure his Patronus; even though it did take him a couple of tries. During class Hermione noticed that Nott actually refused to try and cast his at all. As she watched him curiously his blue eyes locked on hers, and there was an almost imperceptible shake of his head, but that was all it took for her to know he didn't want to discuss it. Hermione tried and failed to cast her Patronus, much to the satisfaction of most of the Slytherins. Because of the frustration of her failure to conjure her patronus it would have been another day of skipping meals for Hermione if it hadn't been for Nott escorting her to both of them. 

At lunch she noticed he refused to look away from her until she took a bite of her soup, once he saw this he gave her a small smile and then ate his food quickly before leaving the Great Hall. Hermione was tempted to follow him, but soon got caught up in conversation with Harry about transfiguration and her curiosity about where Nott left after lunch was pushed to the back of her mind. She noticed that his departure was not met with any questioning glances from the other Slytherins so it must have been something he had done for a while. 

It wasn’t until they were preparing for guests Saturday evening that she remembered to ask. Nott had been at quidditch try-outs all day long, and had returned to help her conjure more furniture and transfigure the ones they had in order to accommodate the guests they were going to be having. Once the work was done she threw herself down onto one of the chairs, while he laid down on the couch. Both breathing heavily from the magical exertion. 

“Nott?”

“Mmmm?”

"Where do you go after lunch.” She waited several heartbeats for him to answer. When she was convinced he wasn't going to respond, he spoke though it was so low that she almost didn't hear him. 

“I go to the place where I can think.” He said. She was going to ask him more about it but they were interrupted with a knock at the portrait. 

Word had spread about the impromptu Wizard Truth or Dare being played at the eighth year head of house dormitory. Several students decided to show up and join in the game. Blaise, Luna, Ginny, Harry, Ron, Draco, Neville, Seamus,Cho, Hannah Abbott, and Justin Finch-Fletchy. Greetings were exchanged along with several wary glances until eventually they all gathered in chairs around the small coffee table and Ginny began explaining the rules.

“Ok it's pretty simple, I have here Wizards Don't Lie, it's a truth serum my brothers invented. It will compel you to tell the truth, but it only works for the first question asked after the sip of the spiked drink. As far as dares go, when you are asked to do a dare you can either do it or you can be a coward and back out. I know us Gryffindors won't be called cowards so easily,” Smirking the redhead flipped her hair over her shoulder, “If you do back out, you are out of the game. Easy enough right?” Everyone nodded their agreement and presented their drinks of choice for the game which Ginny then promptly spiked with a couple drops of the truth serum. She then took her wand and shot a red and gold ribbon out of it. The ribbon floated around the room a couple of times in an intricate pattern before landing on Luna. “Ok Luna, you get to ask someone first, and you can't ask someone who has already gone this round unless the only other choice is yourself.” 

“Ok,” the Ravenclaw said, her voice floating across the room as she looked around in a daze. “Hannah, truth or dare.” 

The red headed Hufflepuff looked shocked to be the first person asked as she looked down at her cup shyly and said, “Truth,” before taking a sip. 

“Do you like Neville; like more than a friend?” 

Hannah choked on air as she tried to fight the answer, but eventually she ground out through clenched teeth, “Yes, that's why I came, I wanted him to be dared to kiss me.” Everyone turned to the Gryffindor in question whose ears were as red as a tomato. 

They went around the circle counterclockwise which meant that it was Ginny's turn, “Neville truth or dare?” 

“Uhh...I uhh...truth I guess,” He said, still recovering from the blush. He took a small sip of his drink and waited.

“It's kind of the obvious question right now, but do you like Hannah as more than a friend?” Ginny asked, rolling her eyes. 

“Yeah, I think she's great,” He said with a small grin. 

“I'm so glad that we are all children about this,” Draco sneered as he turned to look at the group, “Potter Truth or Dare?” 

“Dare,” Harry said with a cocky smile of his own. 

“I dare you to kiss Weasley.” Draco said with a smile. 

“Certainly,” Harry said. Reaching over he grabbed Ginny by the back of the head and gave her a hot open mouthed kiss right in front of everyone. Only after Ron cleared his throat _twice_ did the pair separate. “Should have specified which one, mate,” Harry said with another grin as he pulled back. 

“Alas, you are probably right.” Draco said with a sigh and a shrug. Before popping a crisp that Hermione and Nott had laid out into his mouth. 

“Alright, my turn.” Blaise Zabini rubbed his hands together as he looked around the group. When his eyes landed on Hermione and got a large grin on his dark face, “Granger, Truth or Dare?”

“Truth.” She said almost immediately, taking a small sip. 

“Which house has the more attractive men?” He asked leaning back on the couch he was sitting on, crossing his arms behind his head. 

Hermione tried to fight the words that were threatening to erupt from her mouth, but as her eyes flicked around the group and landed on Nott for a split second she knew she was doomed. “Gry...Gry...Gry” She tried her hardest, but damn she couldn't lie. She kept going through her head of all the Gryffindors past and future to try and weasel her way out of claiming the snakes. But everytime she thought of a man who might be comparable she was instantly reminded of a small dimple on the side of Notts cheek, or the way his blue eyes glowed in triumph when he found an answer to a particularly hard question. As she fought the answer she cursed the Weasley twins and the evil genius tendencies. “SLYTHERIN!” She yelled after several seconds, sounding a bit like the sorting hat. 

Malfoy let a smug grin fall across his face, while Blaise shot her a radiant smile. Theo quirked one side of his mouth giving her a perfectly crooked grin that exhibited the dimple in question. Most of the Gryffindor boys were shuffling uncomfortably in their chairs...then there was Ron. His face was flushed a terrible red color, and he mumbled something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like ‘bunch of tossers,’. Hermione looked down at her hands shyly and shook her head. The game continued on for a couple more rounds before a name was called that pulled Hermione from her daze of embarrassment. 

“Nott,” Ron called out, “Truth or Dare.” 

“Truth,” Nott said, simply matching Rons stare intently over the goblet he was drinking from as he took his sip. It was like a battle of wills, and from what Hermione had seen of the Slytherin, her galleons would go on him. 

“What’s the worst thing you have ever done?” Ron continued his stare as Nott let the potion take effect. 

“I failed to save my mum,” Nott replied evenly. Had Hermione not been spending that past few days with him, she might not have noticed the way his jaw tightened a little when he was done speaking. Had she not been spending so much time with Slytherins in general she might not have noticed the almost imperceptible way Draco and Zabini both stiffened at his answer. The fact was she _had_ noticed and she was now curious for the rest of the story. What did he mean failed to save his mom? What had happened to Lady Nott? She filed the questions away in the back of her mind where a small box was being filled with the wonderful mystery that was Theodore Nott. 

“Malfoy,” Harry asked.

“Truth,” Draco replied evenly.

“Are you planning on hurting anyone,”

“No, I don't want to hurt anyone ever again.” Draco gazed evenly at the boy-who-lived. The answer was phrased in a way to make sure the boy-who-lived could not doubt it, and Hermione was thankful that Draco had worded it this way to prevent further questioning of their motives. 

The two boys had a silent battle with their eyes before Harry nodded his head. “That’s good enough for me.” 

The game continued on for a couple more rounds. Hermione watched Luna snog Hannah, after which most boys had started to shift in their seats uncomfortably. Seamus had to strip down to his boxers for the remaining time he played, and Blaise admitted that he found both men and women attractive. Nott had repeatedly picked truth, but luckily the only other questions he had gotten asked were his favorite color (A deep rich brown) and his favorite subject (Ancient Runes) both of which were asked by Luna. Hermione’s truths were that she actually liked breaking the rules, and that she had kissed a girl one summer camp after she started Hogwarts. Draco was currently sitting shirtless (Part of a dare), and had admitted to once walking in on his parents during an ‘intimate’ moment, after he admitted that there was a universal shudder through the group of teenagers. 

They were going through another round when it was Blaise’s turn. His dark skin soon stretched into a face splitting grin as he turned towards Nott, “Nott,” he said slowly,“Truth or Dare.” 

Everyone waited expectantly for him to take a sip of his drink, but deciding to shake things up Nott instead turned to Blaise, and tilted his chin up a little before declaring, “Dare.” 

“I dare you to snog, Granger.” Hermione's eyes shot up from where they were currently folding an origami swan. Nott was looking at her, his sapphire eyes intense. They stared at each other for what felt like both forever and no time at all. She thought for a moment that she saw his tongue dart out between his lips, wetting them in preparation as his eyes continually searched hers. Finally, Nott let out a low chuckle, crossed his arms, and shook his head. 

“No, Zabini. Call me a coward, I’m done. I am not going to snog her.” With that he stood up and walked away from the group and went to bed, closing his door behind him. 

Everyone slowly turned from the closed door to Hermione who was trying to not feel slightly put-out. She wasn’t going to lie to herself...she did find Nott attractive, and to hear someone who you found attractive blatantly tell a room full of your peers that they would rather be called a coward than kiss you. Well, for Gryffindor’s Princess that was one of the worst things that could have been said to her. She felt insulted, rejected, and utterly undesirable. Blinking back the tell-tale pressure behind her eyes, she forced a small smile to her face as she looked to the rest of the group, “It's getting late guys. We can make this a regular thing, game night, but for now why don't you guys head back to your dorms?” 

“Alright ‘Mione, let us know if you need anything.” Harry stood and gave her a one armed hug goodnight, the rest of the Gryffindors said their goodbyes and they all filed out of the portrait. She was left sitting on a couch staring at the fire as it slowly crackled into the night. She waved her wand and sent all the dishes into the kitchen to wash and grabbed the left over Wizards Don't Lie before placing it on the counter. Letting out a frustrated sigh she put her head into her hands and released several shaky breaths.

“Granger?”

“Godric, Malfoy you scared me!” Hermione said as she held a hand over her chest, willing her voice to remain strong and her breath to even out. 

“I’m sorry,” he said holding up his hands in a calming gesture, “I just wanted to tell you that he didn't mean to hurt your feelings.”

“It’s fine, Malfoy.” 

“I’m sure it is,” he said quietly as he took a seat next to her on the couch, propping his feet up on the coffee table. After several minutes of silence he spoke again, his voice more quiet and subdued, “How did you know? To use the music to help me cast the Patronus?” 

“You needed a memory that isn't clouded by darkness.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, when I try to think about my parents, I'm reminded of what I had to do to protect them. It's why I struggle to cast my Patronus now. I figured yours might be clouded by what you had to do as well. You needed a fresh memory. A memory without war.” She said sadly, as she had spoken her voice had gotten quiet until it was just above a whisper. 

“Can’t you use the new memory as well? Dancing with a couple of idiots in a safe place?” He prompted as he leaned back against the couch and turned his head to face her. 

She stared at him for a couple of seconds, not sure if she should reveal the real reason why she would never be able to use memories of him. Finally, she took a deep breath and looked him in the eyes,“Promise you won't get mad at me,” 

“I...I mean I'll try not too,” He said sincerely, his face now filled with concern as his grey eyes began searching hers, almost begging her not to confirm his fears. 

“When I see you, I get transported back to when you use to all but torture me in school...to the manor. I know you wont hurt me, and maybe someday it won't happen anymore, but until then any memory with you has the same darkness surrounding it. Even the really happy ones, like watching you dance like a fool with your best friend to a muggle song,” As she finished the last sentence a smile spread across her features. He nudged her shoulder with his and they started laughing then. 

“I promise I’ll try my best to create more happy memories with you so the darkness is chased away.” He said seriously, his eyes closing. Around the same time she felt her eyes starting to get heavy too, and before she lost consciousness she remembered thinking that this was not the way her eighth year was supposed to go at all.


	12. Alcove Feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).  
> P.S. Wednesdays are my fav day of the week...I LOVE WEDNESDAYS

Hermione was snuggled up against something hard and warm. It smelled of old spices and some very expensive cologne, but she wasn't able to fight through her exhaustion to wake up. In the back of her mind she knew that this was a person, but through the cloud of sleep she was transported back to being on the run. She had thoroughly convinced herself that this person was Harry Potter and they were in their tent. _Their_ tent which guarded them from the cold harsh world around them. Where canvas acted as an impenetrable barrier between not only the weather, but the future which was unknown and full of dangers, even to the ever prepared Hermione Granger. She often had snuggled up against Harry in the night when the nightmares and terror became too much, so it wasn’t strange that she was holding him now. Though she was slightly confused as to why he smelled good, as he usually smelled like sweat with the underlying tang of fear. She was almost fully back to sleep when there was the loud **_BANG!_ ** of a door being slammed shut, and she was jolted awake. 

Blinking away the blurriness of sleep, her eyes moved up the dark shirt until they landed on the face of her companion. Not Harry Potter, who she was expecting, but the pointy visage of Draco Malfoy. His grey eyes were clouded in exhaustion and he looked over her several times blinking as if he was confused. Then, he looked past her face taking in their position. At some time during the night they had moved in their sleep. She was now wedged in between the couch and him, one of her legs sprawled a top his with her arm wrapped around his stomach, and his arm wrapped tightly around her waist. 

Finally, he brought his hand away from her waist as if he was burned and rubbed his hand down his face before letting out a low groan, “Fuck!” he ground out in frustration before quickly standing up, and marching over to Notts room before pounding on the door. “Theo? Theo, are you in there?” After another couple seconds of silence Malfoy grabbed his wand, “ _Homio Revelio_ ….FUCK!” 

“What's wrong?” Hermione asked through a yawn, wiping her eyes to try and clear some of the blur. 

“He saw us,” Malfoy said before walking to one of the chairs and grabbing his cloak which was draped down the back. 

“Ooookaaay?” Hermione drew out the word so that it ended in a question as Draco donned his cloak in a hurry before walking to the portrait. 

“I can’t talk about it now, Granger. I have to find him before he disappears or does something stupid.” With that Malfoy exited out of the portrait, leaving behind a suffocating silence and a very confused Hermione. 

* * *

Hermione didn’t see either of the Slytherins the rest of the day until it was time for supper. Harry and Ron had met her at her portrait and had decided to walk down to the Great Hall together. They were discussing classes, homework, and which of the new professors they preferred but Hermione found it hard to stay engaged in the discussion. Her lack of concentration was rare as the discussion was about school. Her thoughts, however, kept going back to the way that Malfoy had behaved this morning. The way he had rushed out of the room after realizing that Nott had seen them. Maybe Nott had a thing about seeing or partaking in public displays of affection. Whatever was going on, Hermione had decided to drop the whole ‘lack of kiss’ situation from last night. Nott had his reason, whatever it was, for not kissing her and it wasn’t her job to question it. Just like it wasn’t his job to kiss her...no matter how much she had wanted it…craved it.

She continued on a similar train of thought as they entered the Great Hall. She immediately started scanning the Slytherin table and relaxed a little when she saw both boys sitting next to each other. Her brow furrowed a little, though, when she noticed that both were not talking to each other, and that Nott was currently picking at his plate while Malfoy discussed something with Zabini. 

“First match is this coming Wednesday, so that does not give us a lot of time to prepare,” Her thoughts were dragged away from the Slytherins as they approached the Gryffindor table. Shaking her head she turned away from the serpents to face the lion's den. 

“Who is your first match against? Slytherin again?” Hermione asked, trying to engage the conversation instead of thinking about whatever was going on at the table behind her.

“Yeah. You would think for once they schedule us against Hufflepuff or something,” Ron said through a mouthful of food. Hermione rolled her eyes before placing some roast and potatoes on her plate. 

“Doesn’t matter.” Harry said with a shake of his unruly hair, “They have a new seeker. I talked to Malfoy about it before we started dueling in class yesterday. He told me he was going to be a keeper this year. That means I have to try and figure out how to best prepare the team for a brand new keeper and seeker, _and_ I have no idea how to transfer Malfoys flying style to that position. It’s barmy really, why would he switch his final year?” Everyone at the table shrugged and nodded their agreement at their captain's confusion. 

“Is he still staying captain?” Ginny asked.

“Yeah,” 

“Weird. No matter, we will smoke them like we always do.” Ron announced with a smug grin as he grabbed some pie and filled his plate. 

“Why don't you just ask him?” Hermione said rolling her eyes as she started picking at her food, taking the occasional small bite.

“Ask who what?” Harry leaned forward so he could get a better look at his friend. 

“Ask Malfoy why he decided to switch positions. It’s not like we are enemies anymore. I thought that was the whole point of game night last night. So we could put this- well everything behind us.” Hermione looked at each of her fellow Gryffindors in turn, before settling on Harry and raising an eyebrow in challenge. 

“You’re right, I’ll ask him in Potions tomorrow, good idea Mione,” Harry said with a grin. Ron's face contorted into a grimace as he stabbed his pie and shoved a large piece into his mouth.

“Hermione, want some?” Ginny asked as she grabbed a slice too, Hermione shook her head as she finished her plate. This was the most she had eaten in weeks, and she had to silently thank Nott for his constant vigil in her food the last two days because it had really helped her appetite return. 

The mail had arrived at that point bringing the Weasleys and Harry letters from the burrow, and everyone else small keepsakes from home. She smiled as the Weasleys conveyed their moms warm wishes and demands that they do well in school, each of them rolling their eyes and huffing. She couldn’t help but think of how lucky they were that both their parents had survived the war while also feeling sad that their family hadn’t been able to escape unscathed. 

She thought of Fred. She thought of his pretty blue eyes and the cocky grin he used to shoot her across the common room. She smiled slightly at the stream of memories as they flooded her mind. It had started out pleasant enough, flashes of him flying at the burrow, flashes of him and George wrapping her in a hug at the same time, flashes of him throwing snowballs at his brothers while giving her a smile. But before she could stop herself she was brought in her mind back to that moment. The memories warped until she was standing above his body, as the Weasleys fell on top of him crying. She smelled the burnt stone, and the sweat and dirt that still caked her hair from days on the run. Worst of all, she could still perfectly hear the uncontrollable wails of a mother whose child left the world before her, as Mrs. Weasley clung to the blood stained shirt of her son. 

Before Hermione could stop herself she was standing from the table, air coming into her lungs in quick painful gasps as she ran from the Great Hall seemingly unnoticed. She couldn't go very far, her lungs not taking in enough oxygen. Her legs felt like jelly so as soon as she found a small alcove she ducked in and sank to the ground, placing her head in between her knees, trying to steady her breathing. After a couple of hot breaths she felt a hand on her back rubbing slow circles, and a pleasant deep voice murmuring to her. The rich voice never stopped, even though she couldn’t quite make out what it was saying. It stayed low and smooth next to her ear until she was calmed down enough to notice the hot puffs of breath as the voice grazed her ear. 

Once her breathing calmed down she looked up, “Nott?” 

“Alright there Granger?” He asked, his voice still a low murmur. He was standing on his feet, knees bent so that he was face to face with her. His blue eyes shined with concern, as his brows furrowed, just slightly obscured by his dark bangs which were hanging messily down over his forehead. He was worrying his bottom lip slightly in his teeth, as if biting down would prevent him from speaking things he didn't want to say. She glanced down at his lip before registering what he was asking. 

“Yeah,” She said, nodding quickly as she took another deep calming breath. 

“This happens a lot?” He asked as he moved to sit next to her on the cold stone ground. Pulling one of his legs close to his chest so he could rest one arm across it, the other hand still dutifully making small circles on her back. 

“Uhh...sometimes. It's getting worse since we’ve come back here.” Hermione looked away. No one had noticed her weaknesses until he came along. She wasn’t sure how she felt being so vulnerable around him. She was the one that was supposed to help everyone else, not the other way around. 

“You should go to a healer,” Nott said, as she glanced back at him. His blue eyes sparked in the light of his _Lumos_ spell that she didn't even notice he cast. The small spell illuminated their little cubby in the wall and allowed them each to see each other rather well, though some of his face was still bathed in shadow. 

“Maybe,” She agreed, “It doesn't really hurt me, so I really don't see a need.” She stretched out her legs so her feet were planted on the opposite wall. This alcove was rather small, she mused as she slowly walked her right foot over her left so that her legs were angled. She put pressure against the wall with her feet. She took pleasure in being a tripping hazard for a moment, her legs up in the air slightly stretching the entire length of the cubby. Feet on one end, back against the other, and Nott by her side. 

“Want me to go grab Malfoy? He went to bed earlier, and didn't see you run out, but I could go find him in the dungeons...” Nott’s voice sounded slightly uncomfortable as he dropped his hand from where it had been on her back, leaving behind a whisper of heat that had transferred from his hand. Hermione shivered involuntarily at the loss. She could tell something was bothering him because the concern that was across his face disappeared slowly and was replaced with the mask he wore during class. Cool, collected, and unfazeable. 

“No, why would I?” 

He shrugged his shoulders, and looked out to the hallway. Every once and a while students would pass deep in conversation with friends and housemates. They sat like that for a while each taking pleasure in the company of the other. Not feeling the need to speak, with just the occasional deep breath punctuating the silence. She was about to reach for his hand to hold. To selfishly try and take a little more comfort than he was willing to give when they heard familiar voices with her name on their lips. 

“Where did Hermione go?” Ginny asked as they walked up the hallway. 

“Dunno, she left after the mail came. She was rushing off so she probably went to the library. Must have forgotten to read ahead,” Ron laughed as they passed the alcove.

“Oh, well I'm sure that’s what it was, I’ll catch up with her later then,” Ginny continued as they hurried down the hall and away from sight. Back towards Gryffindor Tower where they would be for the rest of the night. 

“Bloody idiots,” Nott scoffed as he sat by her. His calm demeanor was replaced with a quiet anger as he rolled his eyes. 

“They are not,” Hermione defended, her own anger rising in her chest even though she wasn’t sure why. 

“They are, Granger!” He said, he voice slightly raised as he ran his hand through his black hair, causing it to stick up at odd ends. “How can Malfoy and I see there is something wrong with you but they can’t. They were sitting right next to you!” 

“They have things on their mind! They don't need to worry about me,” She retorted, shoving herself up off the ground so she was standing above him. 

Nott followed her up advancing on her so that she took a step back deeper into the alcove her back braced on the inside wall. “Then who does? Dammit Granger you have spent the last how many years of your life worried about them? They can’t take one blasted minute out of their selfish world to notice you are not eating, or that you have fucking panic attacks?” His voice was raised and he ran his hand through his hair again before dragging them down his face in frustration. He turned as if he was trying to pace, but in such a small space he had to settle with jamming his hands deep into his pockets and breathing deeply through his nose. 

“Panic attacks?”

“Yeah, panic attacks.” He was leaning in closer to her, “Why is it that Malfoy and I, historically your worst enemies, have noticed what your best friends have not?” He asked again, not giving her time to dwell on the bomb he had just dropped in her lap.

“I don't know,” she said weakly. Starting to feel slightly trapped her breath began to come a little faster. She looked from side to side, trying to see away around his imposing form. He was blocking the exit. She knew Nott would never hurt her, but in that moment he was an enemy who was hindering her escape. Her breath began to come in sharp gasps and her vision blurred slightly as she reached for her wand. In a matter of seconds Notts face went from upset to concerned and he backed up to give her the space she so desperately needed. 

“You’re alright, Granger. You’re safe,” He said as he pushed himself up against the wall next to her, trying to give her space while keeping a hand on her back. That calming hand, the one that did wonders as he pressed it into her back and rubbed in small circles. The hand that transferred heat like a lifeline through the cotton of her jumper. Without thinking she grabbed hold of his sleeve and pulled him close, burying her face into the cotton of his shirt. He stood stock still for a couple of seconds, but eventually relaxed and wrapped both his arms around her, slowly rubbing his hands up and down her back, while continuing his murmurings. If one hand relaxed her, two protected her. Two created a world where nothing could get her, like the canvas of a tent deep in the woods. 

She breathed in deeply sucking in the smell of his cologne and his natural scent, both of which were woodsy with a familiar sweet scent underneath she couldn't quite identify. After taking a couple of breaths she noticed there was something else to his scent, something that she would know anywhere. Parchment. She began pulling in deep breaths trying with all her might to grab small wafts of the parchment underneath all the other scents. After what seemed like hours her breathing slowed again, and she rubbed her cheek across his shirt, relishing in the feel of his hard chest on her face and the beat of his heart which was pounding away in a steady rhythm. 

She stayed in his arms. Relishing the feel of the heat he unknowingly transferred. The heat that was slowly chasing away that lonely cold feeling that had permeated her soul ever since she had wiped all memory of herself from her parents. That heat, and the sweet scent that was Theodore Nott. The scent that grounded her in more than one way. The scent that she could have swore she dreamed about on more than one occasion ever since starting back her eighth year...and maybe even before then. 

“Thank you,” She whispered when she finally... _slowly_ pulled away. His arms tightened for a second hesitating to let her go, but eventually they fell away. When she looked up at him she noticed his pupils were slightly dilated, and his irises which were usually a royal color had lightened slightly to a pretty Forget-me-not. She gave a little smile at the irony of the color and his name. 

He cleared his throat and when he spoke his voice was a small husky whisper, “Anytime.” They stood apart awkwardly for a second, before Hermione turned around and started to walk away. She didn't like leaving him alone in the alcove, but as she started walking she began to admit to herself that there in that alcove, in a near strangers arms she had felt safer than she had at any other point in her life. That thought scared her more than the idea of facing Voldemort.


	13. Drunken Minds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> Happy Sunday to all my commenters, readers, and silent fans. Hope you have a great day and week!

Hermione grabbed her favorite Gryfindor scarlet jumper and pulled on a pair of muggle jeans before grabbing hold of her bedroom door and flinging it open. “NOTT!” she yelled as she ran across the shared room and to his door before playfully pounding on it. 

Ever since their shared time in the alcove they had started to become closer. She had begun spending each evening together with him and Draco in Rowena’s Study. They had talked to Professor Slughorn on Monday, who had agreed to let them work as a trio for the herbology/potion assignment as long as they used two plants, one from the controlled herbs list and one that wasn't. They all readily agreed, and began sitting next to each other in potions much to the annoyance of a certain red headed Gryffindor.

Draco and Nott still seemed to have some tension that she was unsure about, but they all talked and joked together most nights so she figured the friends had worked out most of what was bothering them. Harry and Ron had started to question where she was spending all of her time but she had given them excuses as to why they couldn't find her in the library, and told them that if they wanted to see her they would have to let her know at dinner. They had seemed put out by this, especially Ron who had ended the discussion telling her that the Slytherins were going to hurt her and she would have no one to blame but herself. This had earned him a slap from Harry to the back of the head.

“NOTT! We are going to be late,” She yelled pounding on the door again. She heard him mumble lowly in the room as there was a scuffling just on the other side of the door. 

“Salazar’s great beard, Granger,” Nott said as he pulled open the door. He was shirtless, and tried as she might she couldn't help but allow her eyes to drag across his naked chest and down to his toned stomach to the small line of dark hair that disappeared below his trousers. She quickly pulled her eyes back up to his amused face, but she couldn't tell if he had seen her checking out his near naked appearance or if he just found her excessive yelling funny. “I told you I can't go down with you, I'll see you at the pitch ok?” He told her he left her at his door and went to his closet grabbing a shirt. 

She glanced around his room and noticed that while there were some clothes thrown in piles around the space that it was relatively clean for a boys room. She saw a small bookshelf next to his bed, which was currently unmade with black sheets and a royal blue quilt on it. At the base of the bed was a well worn and folded blanket in Slytherin colors. She noticed the Nott family crest at the center of the quilt, and smiled to herself as she remembered he was ‘Lord’ of his family. 

“What’s so funny?” He asked as he began pulling on shoes. 

“Nothing,” She said shaking her bushy hair and looking back at him.

“It’s going to be pretty cold today,” He said casually as he crossed back over to his closet pulling out an old jumper in Slytherin colors, “You sure you don’t want to borrow my jumper? You could always wear it over top of yours,” He said as he held it in his hand. 

“Don’t you try to be a sneaky snake with me. I will not be tricked into supporting Slytherin with you when my own house is the one yours is playing against. We can support our own houses thank you very much,  _ unless  _ you want to wear my scarf.” He gave her a wry grin, his dimple forming on the side of his cheek before stuffing his sweater back in the closet.

“It was worth a shot,” He chuckled and shook his head, turning back to face her fully. Her heart sped up a little. His dark curls were spread across his forehead from the intensity of his head shake, and his blue eyes were staring at her intently as she stood in his doorway. What would he do if she decided to just kiss him? 

Remembering the ‘truth or dare incident’ she rolled her eyes and huffed a little playfully, “Are you sure you don't want to walk with me?”

“It’s not that I don't  _ want  _ to, it’s that I  _ can't _ ,” He said as he stood and stretched his arms out in front of him, “I’ll see you there, yeah?” She gave him a nod and started heading down to the quidditch pitch. 

An hour later Hermione was sitting in the stands alone, having saved a spot for Nott to which he never showed up to claim. She kept glancing around the Slytherin stands with her binoculars trying to see if he was there, but on her fourth pass gave up. She slumped in her seat a little disappointed that he had decided to sit somewhere else when Luna’s soft voice echoed around the pitch.

“Good Afternoon everyone, and welcome to the first game of the 1998 season. I’m your announcer Luna Lovegood, and here with me is Head Boy Calvin Crowely who is looking rather dashing in his gold and black jumper.”

“Uhhh- Thank you Luna. Today Gryffindor is going to be facing off against their long time rivals Slytherin in what is sure to be an outstanding match-”

“Ooohhh is that a Goberstack on the pitch? No, it's just a butterfly-”

“Thank you for that  _ interesting  _ observation Luna, anyway here come the teams now. Looks like Gryffindor is first to take to the sky.” As Calvins deep voice finished the air was filled with flashes of scarlet and gold as they all did a pass around the pitch. Hermione smiled and cheered loudly as they did a quick formation in the air that ended with Harry above the rest of the team. They all gave excited waves, Ginny and Ron doing tricks on their brooms to entertain the crowd. Red and Gold wizbangs fired from behind the team ending in a roaring lion as the horde of students cheered. 

“Looking good as always, though Harry Potter has needed to get his head checked for wrackspurts this year. I hope he took the time to get those out of his ears. Oh, he’s waving at me, hi Harry!”

“Yes, hi Harry,” laughter erupted from the stands at both the Ravenclaws' cluelessness, and the Hufflepuffs exasperation. “Here comes the Slytherin team.”

Green and silver flashed in front of Hermione as they flew up from their changing rooms. Wizbangs flew out from behind them as well, as a snake came through the front of the Gryffindors lion and caused it to explode in a mess of red and gold sparkles. The snake then did a pass around the crowd occasionally striking at the Gryffindors team before shattering in a shower of silver and green. 

“Looks like there was a change to their roster and line-up. Malfoy looks to have taken the position of Keeper this year, which is sure to add to a fantastic game. Looks like they also have a new player all together so let's give a good Hogwarts welcome to their new Seeker. THHHEEEOOODOOOREEE NOOOTTTT,” Calvin called from the announcer booth. 

Hermione’s breath caught and she instantly raised her binoculars to the Slytherin team. Sure enough, Nott was now flying up above the rest of the Slytherin team slowly circling with Harry. After hearing his name he looked over to the Gryffindor stands, and once he found Hermione and their eyes locked he gave her a cheeky wink and a crooked grin. He then turned his attention back to Harry as they flew to their starting positions. 

“Here’s Madam Hooch with the Quaffle, and they're off!” Calvin announced. 

“Ginny Weasley grabs the Quaffle, she is flying fast for the Slytherin Goal post, and...blocked by Malfoy. Good job Malfoy! Rotten luck Ginny!” 

“Yes Luna, rotten luck indeed. Quaffle has been passed to Zabini, who is flying at top speed to Gryffindor’s goal. WOAH... dodged a Bludger sent at him by Finnigan, that slowed him down a bit. Thomas comes up from underneath, but is too short to grab the Quaffle from where Zabini has launched it. TEN POINTS FOR SLYTHERIN!”

The crowd erupted in a variety of cheers and boos. Hermione kept quiet as she sat next to Neville who currently had his arm wrapped around a very happy Hannah. 

“Ginny has the Quaffle, her hair looks gorgeous, what product do you use!” 

“TEN POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR!” Calvin interrupted Luna's ramblings, but everyone could hear the smile in his voice. 

The announcers continued like that for another hour or so until the score was evenly tied at 90. Draco was doing amazingly, blocking over half of the Gryffindors' attempts at scoring. Eventually, the Beaters took to launching the Bludgers after him when the Chasers got close to the Slytherin’s post in order to throw him off. 

Almost immediately both Seekers took off for a nose dive towards the same place, “Looks like the Snitch as been spotted, Potter and Nott are currently going after it, they are almost at the ground...well executed pull out boys,” This earned a couple of laughs from the crowd around Hermione who would have rolled her eyes if she wasn't currently filled with anxiety and fear at her friends nose dive towards the ground. 

“It looks like both boys have lost site of the finicky Snitch, that's a funny word isn't it finicky-”

“Yes Luna it is, but it looks as though they are going again. Harry is in the lead, but Nott is gaining on him. They are neck and neck!” There was a sound from the Gryffindor side of the pitch as a few Gryffindors noticed the Quaffle sneak past Ron.“Looks like Amala Pucey has scored again that makes it 100-90.”

“Theo has the Snitch!”

“What was that Luna?”

“Theo has the Snitch,”

Every eye in the stadium looked up in shock as Nott was currently flying down towards the center of the pitch with a very dejected and surprised Harry following behind him. There was silence before finally Calvin spoke again, “Nott...Nott caught the Snitch, Gryf-I mean Slytherin wins!” Another second of silence before cheers erupted from the far side of the pitch. Hermione couldn't help herself as a large smile spread across her face. She started cheering as loudly as she could much to the confusion of the Gryffindors around her. Nott seemed to hear her because he flew over towards the group before stopping in front of the bushy haired witch. 

“Told you I would see you down here!” He yelled over the sound of boos that echoed as he got closer. Seeing he wasn’t exactly welcome on this side of the stands he began his victory lap as more cheers erupted from the other houses. At the end of his lap he went towards Draco, both boys exchanged a high five in the air before they flew back down and were lost in a sea of silver and green as the whole Slytherin house consumed them in cheers and hugs as they stampeded the pitch. 

* * *

Nott and Malfoy weren't at Rowena’s Study that night as there was a party tearing apart the dungeons in celebration of Slytherin’s victory over Gryffindor. Hermione smiled to herself as she thought about Harry sulking at dinner before begrudgingly admitting that he was actually impressed with both Nott and Malfoys skill in the positions that they held this year. Ron, however, was not impressed and was convinced that the team had somehow cheated. 

Once dinner was over Hermione found herself plopping down in one of her old study spots in the library. She was there for about five minutes when she realized that after a full week of studying in Ravenclaw’s room had spoiled her. She had a hard time focusing as other students chatted away between the stacks of books. Harry and Ron found her there after a while and brought with them full charms essays that they wanted her to look over. She did, and was pleasantly surprised that they had actually written the whole thing themselves. After spending a couple hours with them she yawned and decided to go back to her dorm. 

That's where Nott found her hours later, curled up in a chair in front of the fire with a novel and a cup of hot chocolate. She placed the book down when he stumbled in, clearly drunk off his arse from fire-whiskey. When he noticed her sitting in the chair, his face broke out into a large grin and he staggered over to the couch before slumping down into the cushions. 

“Gr-Granger,” he greeted after a slight hiccup. 

“Nott,” She responded, half her face turned up into a wry grin as she tried to keep the giggles contained inside. 

“How s’your night?” He asked, his eyes glossy and unfocused as he tried to maintain eye contact. 

“Not so bad, but I will admit that I missed the company of a certain wizard tonight,” She didn't know why she was being so blunt. Maybe it was the almost guarantee that he wouldn't remember anything she said tonight when he woke in the morning. Maybe it was because she was tired of the dance they were playing and wanted something more. Maybe it was because she had decided to admit she was attracted to him and wouldn’t be satisfied if she never got the chance to have him. It really didn't matter because once the words left her mouth she was not able to swallow them back. Instead she watched as the mirth that had covered his face slowly disappeared as he shoved his dark bangs out of his eyes and gave a small serious nod. 

“Sorry I kept Malfoy out,” 

“What does that have to-”

“Won't happen again,” He went to stand but lost his balance and fell onto the floor hard. 

“Merlin Nott, are you ok?” She asked as she launched herself from the chair and crouched down by him. He had rolled onto his back and was laughing. 

“That s’gonna hurt in t’morning,” He went to stand again but nearly toppled back over, “Granger, think y’can help m’stand?” His blue eyes looked at her seriously, as if he just asked her to give him a kidney. 

She barked out a humorous laugh, and nodded her head, “Of course Nott, anything for you.” She grabbed his arm, and helped him stand before he tottered over to the couch and fell down again this time taking her with him. She landed on the floor, her knees now stinging from the impact. She held back a grimace from the pain, as he sank down on the cushions. She was now positioned just in front of his knees. He looked up from his lap, to where she was sitting before looking at her face and quickly looking away. 

Seeing his flushed face at her predicament on the floor in front of him she started laughing again. She laughed hard for several seconds before he spoke, the seriousness in his voice caused her to pause, “You are so beautiful when you laugh,” He almost sounded sober. As she watched him curiously a hand came up to push her hair back behind her ears. His fingers lightly touched the skin there leaving behind fire as they traced her ear, causing her breathing to hitch. His hand stayed a moment longer on her cheek before sliding down her neck, his thumb lightly drawing patterns on the skin. Then, dropping his hand to his side he let out a small sigh and spoke again,“Leave m’here, I dont want y’to get hurt trying t’take me t’bed cause im stupid and drank t’much whiskey.” Shaken from her thoughts she stared at him a moment longer, his eyes never leaving her face. 

“Ok,” She said quietly. She was disappointed, and more than a little flushed as she pushed herself up from the ground, “But lay on your tummy.”

“Why?”

“I don't want you to asphyxiate,” 

“Ok, Granger, anything for you.” He echoed her words from earlier but there was more seriousness to his voice as he drunkenly rolled onto his stomach with an ungraceful oomph. 

She turned to leave, but before she made it back to her room she waved her wand at the fire and extinguished it, not wanting him to stumble into it at night and burn himself. Finally, she summoned a blanket from her room. Smirking to herself she made sure it was the one she had in Gryffindor colors, and went to wrap it around his sleeping figure. As she leaned down close to his face, his eyes already closed and his breathing almost even she heard something that made her heart drop into her stomach. 

His deep voice was so soft that had the fire still been lit and crackling the words would have been lost to the night. In the quiet of the common room, however, the words were all too clear and the implications of what he said left her spinning. Taking a deep breath through his nose, a small smile spread across his face as he whispered, “Mmmm...amortentia.” 


	14. It's a Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

The next morning when Hermione walked out of her bedroom she was secretly pleased to see that the blanket she had given to Nott last night was nowhere to be seen. She had actually had that blanket since her first year in Hogwarts. It had been a present from her parents for Christmas that year when she had been sorted into Gryffindor. She hoped that it brought him some of the warmth she had always felt when wrapped in its soft cotton embrace. Part of her thought she should want it back more than she did; it was a present from her parents and those were a valued commodity right now, but she also knew that Nott didn't have the same kind of childhood as her. She secretly hoped some of the love that her parents felt for her had soaked into the fibers, and that maybe it would bring him comfort. 

Breakfast went by quickly, Harry already discussing the next practice the Gryffindors would have. Hermione tuned out of the conversation while eating her eggs, and was about to leave for Arithmancy when Ginny’s low voice called to her from across the table. “Hermione, are we going to have another game night this weekend?”

“Uhhh, actually I don’t know. I haven't had a chance to talk to either of the boys since the game yesterday,” Hermione stood slowly gathering her bag and throwing it over her shoulder. 

“Ok, well let us know what they say!” Neville said excitedly before turning back to his eggs. 

Hermione gave him a smile and a nod before walking out of the Great Hall. She started making her way down the corridors when the sound of footsteps hurrying towards her reached her ears. Out of habit she grabbed hold of her wand and turned her face to see who it was, where she was graced with a flash of shocking red hair. 

“Hey, Ron.” Hermione gave him a small smile, and tried to keep the civility in her tone. His behavior concerning the Slytherins had started to grate her the wrong way. She had repeatedly told herself that he had every right to be suspicious with seven years of evidence and a war backing his claim, but she couldn't control her need to stand by her decisions, and at this point her friends. 

“‘Mione...I was wondering...if you would like to join me for lunch this coming weekend. In Hogsmeade,” He had run his hands through his fiery hair as he spoke, moving from foot to foot in an anxious dance. She was secretly proud of him for finally plucking some courage and directly asking. For a brief moment she entertained the idea of actually saying yes, but then there was a brief flash of dark hair and blue eyes in her mind that caused her heart to stutter. She actually felt guilty for considering saying yes when in reality she had begun to fancy someone else. 

“Actually Ron, I...uh... probably have to study this weekend...NEWTS and all.” She replied, her eyes looking anywhere but his face so she could ignore the rejection that was clearly painted there. 

“Right,” he said quietly, searching her face, “NEWTs. Well, if you change your mind,” He turned on his heel so quickly she could feel the breeze as he stalked away. 

She was left there feeling slightly guilty for several moments before she shook herself and continued to Arithmancy. It wasn't that Ron was unattractive. Yes she had kissed him right before the Final Battle, but that was because she was so happy he remembered the house elves. It wasn’t supposed to be super romantic, she had just been caught up in the moment and the adrenaline had her head spinning anyway. She had been willing to try a relationship with him following the battle, but weeks passed and Ron made no effort to change their status from friends to something more, and eventually she had decided to give up and move on. 

She took a deep breath and steeled her features to prevent her Slytherins from questioning her as she strolled into the classroom. In the back of her mind she started wondering when Malfoy and Nott had become **HER** Slytherins, but ignored the thought as it caused a small smile to cross her face.“So, congratulations on your win yesterday.” She said sinking down into her chair and grabbing some parchment. 

“Thank you, Granger.” Malfoy said with a smug smirk as he leaned forward to get a better look at her from his edge of the table. 

“If you don't mind me asking, why haven't you been on the team since the start? You are clearly the better Seeker,” she directed her question at Nott and rolled her eyes at Malfoy’s playful scoff at her statement. “Well, he is Draco. You can't deny it.”

“Not denying, just nursing this wicked stab to my ego you delivered.” He said while rubbing his chest with a mock grimace. Hermione waited patiently for Nott to look up at her. He was currently rubbing his head in his hands with his eyes locked tight to keep the light out. 

Finally, he opened his eyes just enough to lock eyes with her, and groaned as he spoke“If I tell you, will you let me enjoy the quiet for a little while?” She nodded, “First years were not supposed to try out, Harry got in on his name and fame...don't deny it,” He said as she was about to argue, she closed her mouth as he continued on, “I was going to try-out second year, but then some blond prat decided to use daddy's money and buy his way onto the team,” he gave Malfoy a playful elbow to his ribs. 

“They didn't have try-outs that year, and once I realized Malfoy was the Seeker, I didn't care anymore; just stuck to my studies. After I found Rowena’s Study it just made more sense to stay focused on school rather than sports.” He shrugged at the end of the explanation and started taking notes as Professor Vector entered the room. 

The rest of their class passed uneventfully. Nott walked Hermione again to Ancient Runes and she was surprised at how easily they both discussed the lecture from Arithmancy. Nott kept things casual and would occasionally crack a joke about the way Professor Vector would keep quills in her wild grey hair. At one point he suggested it was made completely of quills that had gotten lost or stuck in there at one point, causing Hermione to lean on his shoulder for support as she laughed so hard she was doubled over.

In Ancient Runes Hermione scribbled away furiously, taking extra detailed notes. They had recently started runes found in ancient Egyption tombs which were far more complicated than typical European symbols. As they were working on deciphering a riddle found in the palace of an ancient Egyptian witch, she was surprised as a small piece of parchment shaped like an origami swan landed in front of her. Unfolding it, Hermione chanced a glance at Nott, but he was excitedly taking notes, giving no indication that he was even aware of the parchment in her hands. 

**_-Thanks for the blanket last night, I mean i'm assuming it was yours and not some other unknown Gryffindor who broke into our common room. I can give it back once I wash it._ **

She smiled as a small blush began to work its way up her cheeks, before grabbing her quill and penning her response. 

_-Keep it, I have plenty. What do you remember from last night?_

**_-Just that I had a lot of fire whisky, and when I woke up on the couch my arse hurt like hell. Did I make a lot of noise last night?_ **

_-Not really, what's the plan tonight? Studying again?_

**_-I actually was thinking of taking a break from the study room tonight. Malfoy has to work with some kid from his Alchemy course, so I was going to work in our common room._ **

_-Mind if I joined you?_

**_-By all means Granger. I mean it_ ** **is** **_your common room too._ **

_-It's a date then._

For a brief moment after she sent the note back to Nott for him to read she thought there might have been a smile on his face, but as soon as she blinked it was gone. Before Hermione could think any more about it she was consumed with the daunting task of deciphering the riddle before her. After class he walked her to lunch, making sure she took a bite of her sandwich before tucking into his plate and exiting through the doors, leaving her to wonder with all her might where his ‘thinking spot’ actually was.

She was about to follow him when she was pulled into a conversation about a Gryffindor party that Friday night. She tried to deny going, but among the table were some of the biggest puppy dog eyes she had ever seen, and before she knew what she was doing she had agreed to attend for at least an hour. Rolling her eyes she went back to her food, and vowed she would figure out where Nott mysteriously disappeared too before the end of eighth year.


	15. In the Glow of the Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

“No, Nott you have to check Godfreys Syllabus and then cross reference that with Dolfields Advanced Rune Transitory before you decide to automatically write down your answer.” she scolded the dark haired wizard who was currently smirking at her. They had been on their ‘study date’ for about three hours at this point, and Hermione was getting increasingly frustrated with the Slytherin currently sitting in front of her. 

“I don't need to check, Granger. I know I’m right.” He said with arrogance that she hadn't seen him wear before. He grinned wider as she huffed indignantly and snatched his paper out of his hand.

“We will just see about that,” She muttered under her breath as she started cross referencing his current translation. He smirked even wider as she shoved her thick hair into a tight bun, snatching those curls that had escaped and shoving them behind her ears. He leaned back against the love seat. He crossed his arms as he watched her, his blue eyes running over her face and down her arms, to where her quill was leaving splotches of ink on her fingers. She knew he was watching her, but she made an effort to keep her eyes on her page. Her frustration only increased when she realized that he was indeed right. He hadn’t needed to cross reference, and had finished the assignment that they had received earlier from class in under an hour; something that normally would take her days. 

Unwilling to admit she was wrong, she read over the paper another time. At this point Nott had taken out his wand, and she could barely hear the spell that he was trying to cast. She thought she might have heard the quietest  _ expecto _ before she slowly drug her eyes up to look at him. He was going through the wand motions of the Patronus Charm. She watched him for a few moments as he tried and failed to summon even the smallest wisp. As soon as he noticed she was watching him, he waved his wand in a different pattern and a small butterfly fluttered out the end before flying over to her and landing on her hand. It sat there for a couple of seconds moving its wings up and down, before exploding into a shower of lavender sparkles. 

“So, did you finish checking,” he asked. 

“Yes,” She huffed before she shoved his paper back at him. 

“How was my translation?” He asked, cocky grin firmly back in place. 

“It was…adequate,” She said, rolling her eyes, while turning to face him. 

“You mean perfect.”

“You sure do think a lot of yourself.”

“Only in a couple of things, and Runes is one of them.”

“What are the others?”

“What do you mean?”

“What other things do you think you are perfect at?”

He stared at her for a few moments, and after a couple times of opening his mouth as if trying to find the right words, he closed his jaw with an audible snap. “Nothing,” he said quietly before sitting forward, his arms resting on his legs. “I am not perfect at anything,”

“I think I am perfect at knitting, Mrs Weasley taught me during Christmas my sixth year.” She offered as she pushed herself off the floor, walking over to the couch he was currently sitting at and tucking her feet underneath her as she got comfortable next to him. “If you had to pick one thing you were good at...besides runes, what would it be?” 

He tilted his head to the side looking at her. Half his face was bathed in firelight, and the other half was cast in shadows. His strong jaw worked, as he occasionally tightened and released his teeth. His eyes had a glow where the warm fire was being reflected in them. She thought he might not answer her, before taking a deep breath and saying quietly, “I am a good flyer.” 

“Yes, you are,” She agreed, shifting a little closer to him. “I am good at protective enchantments. What else are you good at?” 

“I am good at conjuration magic.” 

“I am good at dueling,”

“I am good at remembering...even the littlest details.”

“Performing under pressure”

“Occluding”

“Fighting,”

Their playful game had slowly become somber with their answers and they both stared at the fire for a second before Nott spoke again, “Hiding.” 

“Nott-” She was going to ask him some profound question that had to do with his answers. She was going to ask him why he needed to occlude or hide, or why he had felt the need to say he wasn’t perfect at anything; but as she stared at the boy sitting in front of her all those questions seemed wrong. So, they both sat there and with his face bathed in a golden glow, tired and worn from years of whatever hell he had gone through Hermione lost her nerve. She was actually getting him to talk to her, and she was selfish and just wanted him to keep talking instead of shutting her out like he did so easily. Instead, thinking back to the game of truth or dare they played a week ago she decided to go on an easier path. “What's your favorite food?”

He looked up at her, the cocky grin she loved so much once again lifting one half of his face in happiness that didn't quite reach his currently deep ocean blue eyes, “I quite enjoy chocolate biscuits, Granger. You?” Hermione took the time to recognize that his eyes seemed to change with his emotions, and swore to herself she would learn every shade they could create. 

“I like fresh fruits...any of them really.”

“What's your favorite time of the year?” He asked, finally sitting back against the couch clearly trying to relax. 

“I like winter. I like it when the cold air stings your face, or when you wake up to a fresh blanket of snow. I love the way it feels when you are the first person to crunch into it, leaving behind your footprints. I used to sit up in Gryffindor Tower and watch as the snow fell and just stare at the purity of it.” She said as she slowly leaned towards him again until she felt his strong shoulder beneath her face, both facing the fire. It was an action that she had done over a hundred times with Harry or Ron, but here in the quiet of their common room, with Nott’s shoulder being the one she leaned up against, it felt significantly more intimate. 

“I like winter too, I love the quiet of it. It’s as if even the creatures know not to disturb the peace of the world. Almost like everything is in agreeance to just rest for a bit, because even the trees need time to sleep.” She felt his head slowly lean down until he was almost laying it on top hers, but not quite braving those last few centimeters to touch their heads together, “Favorite animal?” 

She almost said otter as a reflex. The words clinging to the back of her throat with her mouth still open to form the ‘O’, before she closed her mouth and slightly shook her head and said softly, “I don't know anymore.” It wasn’t that the otter had to be her favorite animal, but she always felt connected with an otters personality...but lately she just didn't feel that anymore. The quiet stayed in the room. Reminded of winter and the silence that Nott spoke so fondly of only moments before she remained quiet as her eyes got heavier in the warm glow of the fire. She felt safe once again propped up on the shoulder of a man she barely knew. This time, however, she didn't let herself question it and just allowed the warm feeling to fill her chilled soul. 

She was asleep no more than five minutes later, so she didn't feel the Slytherin slowly lay her back on the couch. She didn't hear him whisper to himself how beautiful she was and she didn't feel him summon his own Slytherin blanket from his bed and tuck it around her. She didn't sense him kneel down on one knee and lower his face towards her forehead. In the glow of the fire she didn't feel his breath inches from her forehead as he fully intended to give her a soft kiss. And she definitely didn’t feel him hesitate just before her skin. She didn't feel him stop. She didn't hear him letting out a deep sigh before standing up and walking away. She did, however, hear the soft click of his door shutting before falling back into the state of unconsciousness, surrounded by the smell of parchment and a sweet scent that she barely recognized. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this BONUS chapter. I love the reviews I've been getting and would just like to say Thank You for being so patient with me, as this is my first story and your reviews have given me such a confidence boost. Have a great week and Happy Wednesday!


	16. The Saviors and the Saved

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

The next few weeks flew by faster than any other in Hermione's life. The party at Gryffindor Tower had been relatively boring, so Hermione had made a quick appearance before returning to her common room and hanging out with her Slytherins. They played a few games of exploding snap and drank fire whiskey into the morning, until Draco was so tipsy he had to stay on their loveseat or risk breaking his neck trying to descend the ever changing stairs. Her birthday came and went. Draco got her a couple packs of sugar quills and chocolate galleons to keep in her bag. She also got a set of self inking quills in a beautiful gold and scarlet, and a couple books on advanced ancient runes from Nott. Both gifts were well received, but it was in the privacy of her room that she let herself blush profusely as she ran her fingers over the new quills. He even included a note that told her how to tie the quills to an ink pot that she could keep anywhere (as the quills themselves did not create ink). Hermione had slowly begun to gain weight under the watchful eyes of her mealtime guardians. Between the meals and the occasional snacks that both Slytherins brought to study sessions she had put on nearly a stone. 

Nott and Hermione had started to regularly study together in the dorm rooms on nights that Draco had to work with his partner in Alchemy, who according to Draco couldn’t tell the difference between gold and bronze if he was holding a galleon and a knut. Those were the days Hermione looked forward to the most. Spending time with Nott was like spending time with a friend she had known her whole life and yet was just meeting for the first time. They laughed more often than not, and frequently helped each other on homework. She filled in for him where he fell short and vice versa. They just clicked. On days when they could, the trio met in Rowena’s Study. There they decided they would be growing Valerian Root and a variation of Belladonna in order to hopefully create a potion that caused the illusion of death but could be undone with the right antidote. 

With the addition of the Slytherins, and the new normalcy of her schedule she had reduced her anxiety attacks to about once every two weeks. Each time she had one she was always cared for by the Slytherins. They would give her food, or a blanket and a cup of tea. They would sit with her during the ones she had in public, usually pulling her into an alcove for privacy. Nott always held her through the ones she had when he was around. She couldn’t quite understand why she wanted Nott to hold her, but made Draco simply touch her back during, but both methods helped her considerably. Draco was allowed to hold her afterwards, and usually gave her long hugs until she told him he was smothering her, or she couldn’t breath through his expensive cologne. These jokes usually indicated that the panic had stopped and she was ok to go through the rest of her day. 

The friendship between the Gryffindor and the Slytherins eventually grew, especially with the addition of a semi-weekly game night for the eighth years and Ginny and Luna. This became more and more popular to the point that the Heads of House had to occasionally transfigure their beds into couches in order to have enough seating. The only person who still seemed to hate the Slytherins was Ron, who had tried to ask Hermione nearly once a week since she had turned him down for a date in Hogsmeade.

The group of eighth years had created a companable stance where they would tolerate-or in some cases enjoy-each other's existence, much to the chagrin of Pansy and a number of other pure-blooded Slytherins and a couple of other people who couldn't accept that the war was over. Hermione tried not to let this bother her, though occasionally when a slur would be thrown her way during an exceptionally hard day she would find herself crouched beneath the portrait of Merlin's tower on the seventh floor crying to herself. Nott always found her there when she was upset and would force her to curl up on the loveseat with his Slytherin blanket while he read out loud from one of the novels he was engrossed in at the time. He usually read several books at once so Hermione got her pick from what he was reading. He would often loan her his books under penalty of a good hexing if it was returned in poor shape, a silent joke that the book worms shared as both treated books like the treasures they were. 

One cold late October day Nott and Granger were both laughing with each other as they made their way to the Forbidden Forest for D.A.D.A. The professor had asked the students if they wanted a change from the monotony of the classroom and, as teenage students were to do, they made a quick decision and all unanimously voted yes. What they hadn’t counted on was Professor Jacobson then telling them to meet him in the Forbidden Forest that Saturday at seven in the morning. The pair were quickly joined by Harry, Ron, and, much to Ron's displeasure, Draco. 

“So the Forbidden Forest...what do you think Jacobson has planned for us,” Harry said as the group continued down to the forest edge, his shoes crunching on the dead leaves that were blanketing the grounds in the bright oranges and reds of fall. 

“Oh nothing good I’m sure.” Draco drawled as his long legs carried him ahead of the teenagers so he was in the lead. “But, I am sure it will be a piece of cake for you and Weasley, you did defeat the Dark Lord after all.” 

“Don't you forget it,” Ron spat as he tried to out pace Draco. 

“Honestly Ronald,” Hermione rolled her eyes from where she walked nestled between Harry and Nott. “I am sure it will be exciting. This is the first time I’ve been this excited to go to a Defense class since Lupin left.” 

“You didn’t find Snape’s courses scintillating?” Draco turned back to face her, walking backwards and still outpacing Ron without trying. The smug smirk placed firmly on his pale face made her realize that he knew he was getting on the Redheads nerves and found it amusing. 

She narrowed her eyes at him, but the smirk on her lips betrayed her attempt at any severity in her nonverbal threat, “Snape had a bad case of Favortism-itis.”

“Favortism-itis?” Nott asked while looking down at her with a crooked grin. 

“Yeah, he favored those who wore green and silver,” Harry said from her right side. “Do you know how often I had to hear her complain when Malfoy got better marks?” 

“Upset were you, Granger?” Draco asked, flashing her a smile with teeth, “Can’t stand I was better?”

“You weren’t better,” Hermione nearly shouted before lowering her voice back down, “Snape just favored you!”

“And now? When Snape isn’t here to favor me? Remind me...what did you get on your Potion’s essay covering Betony and its properties?”

Hermione’s face flushed a deep red before she spoke through clenched teeth, “Exceeds-”

“And what did I get?”

“Oh shove it, Malfoy,” She said hands clenched at her side, “I still think I deserved an O, too.”

“Then you would have gotten one,” He announced triumphantly as he turned on his heel again without breaking stride. 

Hermione noticed Harry snicker to her right, and elbowed him hard in his side. He grunted but got the point as he schooled his features, not quite able to change the way his green eyes were still sparkling in mirth. Ron hadn’t said anything during the exchange and remained pouting the entire time until they got to the assigned location. They noticed the other eighth years had already gathered and were standing around Professor Jacobson as he chatted with them.

“-and that was the last time I ever asked to watch a Hebridean Black get a tooth pulled.” He finished as the group strolled up, “Miss Granger, your parents were dentists right?” He asked as the group approached. 

“Yes, sir.” 

“Ever think of following in their footsteps and working with magical creature tooth care?”

“Um...not really sir,” 

“Well it is a fascinating job if you ever change your mind,” He said as they took their spots around him. “I am sure you are all curious as to why I asked you out here today.” There were several nods and murmurs of agreement as he paused, “By a show of hands how many of you have been into the Forbidden Forest?” Everyone raised their hand, “Merlin...we should change its name to the Frequently Frequented Forest instead.” He joked. “Nah nevermind doesn't have quite the same ring to it.

“Ok, so we are going to have a little fun today. I have designed an obstacle course of sorts that I would like you all to go through, but you can choose not to go through if you want. If you do, however, decide to participate there will be some...rewards.”

“What are the rewards, Dan?” Seamus called from in front of Dean. 

“Glad you asked Mr. Finnigan, the rewards are as follows, 150 points for your house.” People stared at him in shock, “Also you don’t have to write an essay that I will be assigning that will be due next week as you would have exhibited your knowledge over the subjects in question.” There were more murmurs, “Not only will you be excused from writing the essay but you will be awarded an ‘O’ on the assignment!” More murmurs penetrated the otherwise quiet group and Professor Jacobson raised his hand for silence, “One last thing, you will have to advance through this course in a group as it is too dangerous to go through alone.” 

“Where is the course?” Pansy sneered from the back of the group, looking around as if the obstacle course was going to pop out in front of her. Professor Jacobson's grin grew wolfish as he motioned everyone to take a step closer. He then waved his wand at the ground where, buried below years of leaves and other detritus, there was a small wooden trap door. He waved his wand and the door opened, revealing a dark tunnel that went straight down into the earth. The only thing that was noticeable before the light was consumed by darkness were several very thick spider webs. Clearly this was an Acromantula tunnel, the only question was if it was still in use currently or if it had been abandoned. 

“Fuck that!” Ron said, backing up. 

“So I take it you are not going in?” Professor Jacobson asked with an amused look. 

“Fuck no!” Ron said more vehemently before turning on his heel and walking right back to the castle, shoulder checking Nott and Draco on his way through. 

“Ok then, that’s one person down. Anyone else who feels this is not something they want to participate in feel free and return to the castle. We will have regular lessons starting again next Monday.” A few more Hufflepuffs and Slytherins turned and walked back to the castle. 

“Ok for the rest of you...your teams can be either three or four people.” 

“What's the catch, Dan?” Asked Neville. Everyone knew this about  _ Dan _ . It was never this simple, he always had a catch when it came to pairing up in his class. 

Professor Jacobson's smile grew wide, “Oh Mr. Longbottom would I ever trick my own House?”

“Yes!” Every voice chorused around him. He huffed playfully before turning back to the group. 

“Your team  **HAS** to consist of a pure-blood, half-blood, and muggle-born. You also  **HAVE** to have more than one house represented! Team up and we will send the first group in. You will have one hour to complete the obstacle course. If you do not complete it within the allotted time I will come in and get you. The team that does it the fastest wins.” Everyone started shuffling around looking for people who would fill the requirements of the group. Hermione looked at Harry. If Ron had stayed they would have had a full team right there, all they would have had to do would be to convince Anthony Goldstein or Justin to join. But between the two of them and with Ron out of the picture…

“Looks like you two could use some charismatic pure-bloods,” Draco drawled as he and Theo approached them. 

“If you see any can you point them our way?” Hermione asked playfully. Nott narrowed his eyes at her in mock offense before turning to Draco. 

“Hey Malfoy, I heard those two Gryffindors could use a charismatic pure-blood,” Nott said waving his hand in their direction. 

“You know, Nott I heard something similar!” Draco said, smirking as he approached the group. “Face it Granger, this is one adventure that we get to tag along in. Besides between the four of us, who really stands a chance at beating our time?” Harry and Hermione shared a look and silently communicated with each other before breaking out into matching grins.

“We’re in,” Harry said. 

* * *

Hermione had dressed in her muggle clothing since it was a Saturday. She was extremely thankful for this as she tightened the laces on her trainers and pulled the edges of her jumper down. The only thing she hated was that she hadn’t thought to bring anything to help her with her hair. She huffed for what was the millionth time, shoving back her curls as the team of four waited for their chance to tackle  _ Dan’s  _ obstacle course. 

She watched as Draco lounged on a tree with his back to the trunk, his feet pulled up and hands entwined while his elbows rested on his knees. Harry was currently pacing back and forth in front of the group playing with his wand, occasionally muttering curses and hexes under his breath as he tried to recall as many as he could before they ventured in. Nott was seated near Draco and had recently picked up a flower, a daisy by the looks of it, and was winding the stem in a circle. She watched him closely, from where she sat, as he tied the stem together. He motioned for her to hold out her hand, which she did without question. He set it down in her palm before raising his eyes to meet her. He waved his wand over the flower still maintaining eye contact. She felt his magic caress her palm and the flower transfigured into something else. Finally, pulling her eyes from his penetrating stare she saw a small lavender scrunchie. She gave him a grateful smile and was about to kiss him on the cheek in thanks when the smooth voice of Professor Jacobson stopped her thoughts in their tracks. 

“Alright you four! You are up!” It was around noon and so far no one had made it through the course. Professor Jacobson had saved their team for last and she had a feeling it was because of their reputation. She pulled her hair up into the scrunchie as she made her way over to him.“Got any names you want your team to be called?”

“Saviors and the Damned,” Draco said as he nudged Nott. They both smirked a little at that. 

“Saviors and the Saved,” Hermione said, raising her head in pride. She didn't have to tell the Slytherins that she thought of herself as part of the latter and that they were the former. The look in her eye said it all, both serpents averted their eyes and nodded their ascent. 

“Well, Saviors and the Saved,” Professor Jacobson walked up to them and handed them each a pendant. “Keep these on you at all times, they have been infused with a locator spell and will help you if you get stuck.” The pendants were rounded, with a small natural carving out of the center, they were made of some natural stone and all different colors. Hermiones was a beautiful opalescent, Draco’s was black, Nott’s was a dark rich brown, and Harry’s was a beautiful green that almost challenged his eyes in brilliance The band that was used to keep it around their necks was made of strong leather and wrapped around the opening in the center. “If you want out before the time is up, or you are too frightened to continue just hold your pendant in your hand and say my name ‘Dan Jacobson’, I will be able to apparate to your location to get you out. You have one hour starting in exactly sixty seconds.” He led them over to the trap door which was big enough for one person to jump through at a time. 

“I’ll-” Harry started.

“Go first,” Hermione finished with a smile, he nodded. “I’ll go next!” She said confidently. 

“Could we convince you otherwise-” Nott started, but was interrupted at the red sparks shot from their professors wand signaling the time to start. He didn't have time to argue any more as Harry jumped down the hole without hesitation, followed in speedy succession by Hermione who was quickly smothered by the darkness. She didn’t miss the look that Nott shot to Draco as she fell down, the Slytherins were nervous.


	17. Challenges

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> A/N 2 Trigger Warning: Hermione is attacked in this chapter and pinned down. Also, some not so nice things are said. Just a warning here in case you need it. 

Hermione landed on the cold stone floor of an old cave system. She immediately rolled out of the way so the Slytherins could drop in behind her without fear of landing on her. Wand in hand she silently cast a _lumos_ that matched Harry’s who helped her stand. “Alright, ‘Mione?” She nodded. They heard a thud behind them as Draco landed and sprang forward with his wand in hand. Nott was next, and landed in a perfect crouch as he strode towards them. With four wands shining brightly Hermione looked around and got her first good look at their surroundings. 

They were in a small tunnel, the spider webs had cleared up a little, but some still clung to the stone walls. There were stalactites hanging tightly to the ceiling but the ground was fairly spare of stalagmites. Somewhere in the distance there was the constant _drip drip_ of water as it hit the ground. It was dark. By far the darkest area Hermione had ever been in. If it wasn’t for their wands she was sure they wouldn’t be able to see their hands in front of their face. 

“Well, there is only one way to go.” Harry said before walking forward. “Let's get a move on,” He called. 

“Do you want to be in front or back?” Hermione asked the two Slytherins. “I don’t mind either way.”

“Pattern? Scarlet to emerald?” Draco asked. Hermione nodded to him and he walked off to catch up with Harry. She gave Nott a reassuring smile and started after the blond, feeling safe placed in the middle of her Slytherins with her best friend leading for good measure. They eventually came to a natural room. It was quite large and could probably fit two D.A.D.A. class rooms inside it. It was filled with stalagmites that littered the ground as tripping hazards. Some of them were barely bigger than a few inches, while others stood at least one meter tall. They blocked out all corners of the room except for a small walkway that led through the center. Harry was standing still just inside the entrance. 

Draco was staring at Harry with his brows scrunched in confusion and Hermione pushed her way through gently before laying a hand on her best friend, “Harry...what’s wrong.” Harry gave her a look, the same look he gave her every time his super weird sixth sense kicked in. They were in trouble. “Wands at the ready boys,” She called softly, raising her own wand a little higher for good measure. 

“Hermione, do you remember first year?” She waited, “When there was only one way through that fire after Snape's test?” She nodded, “There is only one way through,” He motioned towards the small opening on the opposite side of the room. 

“You think we will be-”

“Somethings going to happen once we are too far in this room. I can feel it.”

“You can feel it?” Draco asked incredulously. 

“Yes, Malfoy. I trust my gut and so far it hasn’t led me too far astray.” Harry said, turning towards the blond. “It told me I could catch you on that broom first year, and it told me everything would be ok if I went into the forest during the battle. Right now it is telling me that there is something in this room that is dangerous.” 

Malfoy clenched his jaw a little bit in thought, but nodded his head and raised his wand a little higher. “Only one way through,” Malfoy echoed quietly. Hermione clenched her wand in her hand and started walking slowly into the room. There were a couple of quiet objections from the boys, but when she didn’t stop they eventually followed her. There was only one way through, and she would not waste time speculating on what could be waiting for them when it could have been any number of things. 

Eventually, the only sound echoing around them was the scuffling of shoes and the occasional drip of the water. They were a little over half way through the chamber when she saw the first sign of movement out of the corner of her eye. In the shadows that lingered at the edges of their _lumos_ lights Hermione saw a tiny skeletal hand gripping the edge of a calcite column. Her breath caught and her heart sped up as she turned quickly on her heel to warn the boys. Her mouth was open about to shout the warning when she felt something collide hard into her side. 

“What the _fuck_ is **_that_ **?” She heard Draco shout as Harry rushed forward. She felt something clawing at her skin, and she gripped her wand tightly. She pushed herself up enough to get a good look at it. It was human shaped, but severely emaciated with bones sticking out of it at odd angles. Her blood ran cold as she recognized what this was, and without thinking too hard about it she gripped her wand trying to get an angle to cast a spell at it.

“ _Incendio_!” Harry shouted, aiming true to the creature. The creature shrieked and backed up towards the maze of stalagmites as fire erupted on its pale skin. “Inferi,” he yelled as he helped Hermione up.

Looking around there were at _least_ ten other of the creatures slowly advancing on them. Hermione grabbed Harry’s hand as her adrenaline began to pick up. This was something she could do. No time for panic as she was brought back to the place in her head when all she wanted to do was protect her best friend. In the back of her mind she throught how strange it was that in this moment she knew she would not panic. In this moment she had control. She was Hermione **_fucking_** Granger. 

“Move Harry,” She said as she pushed him to the door. To her this was no longer a school assignment. It was every other time she had fought to save this boy's life, and he knew it. He nodded to her and turned to run towards the door. Stopping just short of going in, always waiting to make sure his friends were alright. 

Hermione pushed her way in between the savior of the wizarding war and the inferi who were currently advancing. Hermione squared her shoulders and confidently shouted, “ _Protego Diabolica_ ,” creating a barrier of the flames between her and the advancing Inferi. Both Slytherins were standing dumbstruck. “Move!” She shouted at them, as she started backing towards the door that Harry was now standing at, holding his wand in case she needed back up. 

Draco shook out of his stupor first and ran towards the door. Nott was next and started shooting balls of flames at the inferi who were climbing on stalactites trying to climb above Hermione’s protective fire. “Do you think they can follow us through the door, Granger?” He yelled over the roar of her flames. 

“I don’t know!” She said as she grabbed him and yanked him behind her, shooting a quick _Incendio_ as an Inferi leaped through the air next to him. He stared at her in shock. “I’ve got this Nott, go!” He grabbed her hand and held it fiercely. 

“Not without you!” He started backing up faster, and held her hand tightly, practically dragging her to the doorway. They worked in tandem shooting fire-based incantations at the Inferi until they were all at the door. Draco and Harry crossed the threshold first, leaving the other two to shoot more spells. “I-I can cast Fiendfyre,” He said as more inferi approached, their jerky unnatural movements causing their limbs to contort into disgusting shapes. They pushed their bodies through small openings causing limbs to become disjointed and broken. Where there had once been ten there were now more than twenty. It was like they were coming from the walls. 

“Can you control it?” She asked. She was so distracted by his admission that she lost her concentration for a split second. This cost her as one of the monstrous creatures crawled forward and bit down on the soft flesh of her arm. She released a small gasp, causing Nott to glance down at her where she had dropped her wand, and was trying to pry the creature off of her skin. 

“Shit,” he cursed, and cast a nonverbal spell that caused the creature to erupt into flames and crawl back with an unnatural scream. Hermione weakly reached down and picked up her wand, before backing up and casting a quick _Immobulus_ at another who was stopped mid air in its attack against Nott. 

“ _Fiendfyre,_ ” The spell burst forth from his wand as he stepped forward. The agonized cries from the creatures met her ears as she was pulled behind Nott by one strong arm. The flames took the form of a giant salamander, slowly devouring the flesh of every inferi in the room. He held the spell for several moments before he dismissed it, the flames disappearing in defiant hisses. He then weakly fell to the ground on one knee before completely toppling over. Completely spent from the last few minutes of casting spells, and the control it took to keep the Fiendfyre from consuming all in its path. 

“Nott,” Hermione tried to shake him awake, but he remained unconscious. She was suddenly torn between the need to check on both Harry and Draco and make sure Nott was ok. She checked him over, and deciding that he would probably wake up soon as this was just spell exhaustion, she put a levitation charm on his body, making sure to grab his wand from where it had fallen and placing it in her pocket. She then summoned him from behind her as she walked through the next tunnel. This section of the cave was covered in a bioluminescent algae giving off a strong glow that allowed her to see without her wand. She whispered _Nox_ as she approached the next chamber. The room was relatively empty, just a large open space about the size of the Transfiguration classroom. She took a deep breath as she approached the blond and black head of hair. They were staring at something that she couldn’t quite make out as she wandered through the tunnel. Once she could see though, it made her blood run cold. 

“You thought you could kill me?” A voice that she hadn't heard in months taunted, “There were more than seven you insolent fools.” The pale visage of Lord Voldemort stood two meters in front of Harry and Draco, sneering in a superior way. He was wearing the same dark robes he had worn in the battle and was currently brandishing the Elder Wand. 

This wasn’t right. Hermione could feel herself thinking but she couldn’t say it out loud. The wand was broken, and He was dead. Draco was currently trembling, as his hand gripped his wand so tightly his knuckles paled against his skin. Harry had his wand held tightly, but was also shaking in fear. 

“You failed you miserable boy!” Voldemort taunted in his cool voice, “You failed to save your friends and your family, and the war will be won by those of worthy strength and power!” Voldemort then turned his cold red eyes to Draco, “And you. You failed as well. How dare you associate with a Mudblood and this...this failure. You are no better than that whore of a mother who I will torture in every possible way once I leave this place.” This wasn’t right. Hermione's eyes danced around, but Voldemort had yet to notice her. That wasn’t right either. Voldemort would have noticed her. Voldemort would have attacked her blood status, and would have summoned her before him to torture Harry. 

Knowing something wasn’t right, and having no other way to protect her friends Hermione ran to the right side of both boys before shouting, “ _Ventus Duo_!” The resulting gust of wind caused both boys to fly away from the dark wizard, and hit the back wall stunned. As she continued to run, trying to find somewhere to shield her body from the resulting curse surely to be thrown her way she hit a patch of water on the stone floor and slipped, her wand flying out of her hand and landing with a clatter on the other side of the room. Voldemort's pale red eyes landed on her as she lay on the ground, pushing herself onto the balls of her feet in a crouched position. He walked forward and started to morph before her very eyes. 

_A boggart!_ She thought. _Of course it was a boggart_ . _That’s why Harry hadn’t attacked Voldemort, the boggart was playing off of his biggest fears_ . _He wouldn't have thought it was a boggart, and would have just panicked seeing Voldemort alive._

But she knew! She could cast the spell because she knew what it was. She glanced at Harry and Draco who were lying crumbled slightly on the floor. She grimaced hoping she hadn’t hurt them when she threw them into the wall. She then turned back to the boggart and waited for the familiar face of McGonagall to appear and tell her that she had failed, but her heart stopped as another much more terrifying witch took shape instead. 

“Oh look! Potter’s Mudblood. Back to play?” ‘Bellatrix’ sneered with a horrifying smile as she approached Hermione. ‘Bellatrix's’ wild hair was springing up in odd directions and her darkened teeth gleamed in the light of the algae. Hermione tried to push herself up but couldn't. The fear had penetrated her legs as she crouched, shocked and terrified. Hermione knew that if her adrenaline was already going she might have collapsed into a panic attack, but for some reason when she was actually in a fight or flight scenario she could fight. It was only when she was back somewhere that echoed safety did she actually process what she went through. This would be fun to deal with later.

From behind ‘Bellatrix’, the boggart created another figure. ‘Malfoy’. In the back of her mind she could hear Professor Lupin's voice telling her that boggarts could morph into more than one thing if your fear called for it. Before she could fully process what had happened the boggart ‘Bellatrix’ advanced quickly pinning her arms to the ground right as Hermione was reaching for Nott’s wand still stowed safely in its denim cage. “Your turn dear nephew.” The last time she had faced one of these vicious entities Lupin had never allowed them to get too close to the students. Now there was nothing to stop the boggart from hurting her, a thought that she was reminded of as ‘Bellatrix’s’ nails penetrated her skin slightly. She tried to push it off of her but the boggart ‘Bellatrix’ fought back and kept her on the ground.

“ _Acc-_ ” Hermione tried to summon her wand, but ‘Malfoy’s’ hand covered her mouth, smothering her call as it was swallowed by his palm. 

“No need for that Mudblood,” His voice was cruel, mocking. Nothing like the Draco she knew. The boggart ‘Malfoy’ smirked at her, able to read her thoughts and fears as if it was a well practiced Legillimens, “Oh, you know deep down I have wanted to do this for years,” It sneered before tightening its grip on her face to a bruising degree. It lowered its face to her ear before whispering, “I would have tortured you in the Manor too, if only my dear aunt had shared.” Hermione was currently laying on her back as these two figures smirked down at her. 

‘Bellatrix’ lowered her head to her other ear and squeezed her arms so her nails dug into Hermione’s skin even more, “Don’t worry Draco, you will get to hurt her now. Just like you’ve always wanted, like you will always want. Oh look, her perfect scar!” It pushed Hermione’s jumper sleeve up to reveal the scar that she had worked so hard to keep hidden. 

Hermione, trembling in fear, was thinking that this couldn't possibly get any worse when out of the corner of her eye she saw Nott. Relief flooded through her. He had woken up! Now she just has to communicate with him what was going on. That this was a boggart. He approached her slowly, and she looked up into his blue eyes willing him to understand. Something inside of her clenched when he got closer. His eyes were the wrong shade of blue. They were too dark. Something was wrong. 

“Save some for me please,” He crouched down and lowered himself so he could look over her face, his body hovering above hers, “Gryffindor’s Princess, how far you have fallen,” His voice was low. This wasn’t Nott, “Oh, but you know this is the _real_ Nott,” It smirked at her before lowering his face even more so she could feel it’s breath. _There is no spearmint. It's not him_. She chanted this over and over in her head. “I will hurt you!” It chuckled darkly. ‘Bellatrix’s’ and ‘Malfoy’s’ hands tightened in unison, until she cried in muffled pain. Fear gripped her almost as tightly as it had in the Manor all those months ago, and then all three of the figures took a deep breath in through their noses.

“You smell fantastic, marinated in this fear.” they all said at once. 

The ‘Nott’ grabbed a handful of her curls and pulled, “I can’t wait until we get a chance to carve you up, until you bleed your dirty blood all over this room. I will personally make sure that you suffer until you are drenched in fear, and we will drink it up until there is nothing left of you! Until not even your precious friends can identify you.” The ‘Nott’ boggart lowered its face until it was right in front of her, so close its lips touched her cheek as it spoke in a low voice, “You are _nothing_ to me. I could never find a girl like you attractive. I will never be able to care for you, with your filthy blood. I will make you-”

“ _Redikulus!_ ” Three voices chorused around her. Each figure that was standing above her now looked different. The ‘Draco’ was standing there in nothing but his pants with ‘I’m a wanker’ marked on his forehead in bright flashy letters. The ‘Bellatrix’ had her wild curly hair shaved, and was dressed otherwise as a goofy clown except for the obnoxious makeup which was missing. Finally, the ‘Nott’ was wearing Professor Vector’s clothes, and to complete the look his hair was now made entirely of quills. Hermione could vaguely hear _her_ boys laughing, causing the boggart to shrink away back into the darkness but she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t bring herself to laugh. Eventually, the boggart reabsorbed the other figures until just ‘Bellatrix’ remained. Boggart ‘Bellatrix’ sneered as she stared hard at something on the other side of the room. 

It was Nott. He had finally woken up and was currently brandishing Hermione’s lost wand. “Granger,” he said weakly, “come here.” On his command, Hermione forced herself up and ran over to the otherside of the room where Draco, Harry, and Nott were waiting. Harry grabbed her and pulled her behind them. The boggart stared at Nott hard, advancing towards him. Hermione watched as something shifted behind his currently storm cloud blue eyes. She recalled all those weeks ago in the glow of the fire when they discussed what they were good at. One of his answers rang loud and true in her mind above all others...Occlumency. 

The boggart moved again, its lips pulled in disgust as it tried to pinpoint his fear. The staring contest continued for several minutes. Nott fighting the boggart's natural offensive ability to penetrate his mind. He began to sweat slightly in exertion before the boggart smiled triumphantly and began to shift. It began to take the form of a man, but right as it was done shifting Nott lowered his voice and chanted the spell in a lethal voice she had never heard him use. This caused the boggart to turn into a ginger haired sky dancer tube thing, with Weasley is our King written on its chest. Everyone giggled or laughed at this and slowly made their way to the other side of the room, as the boggart slowly reduced itself to near nothing, and disappeared into the dark. No one commented on how the figure that the boggart took looked very similar to Nott just before he cast the spell. 


	18. Stuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 

Hermione let Harry lead her down towards the tunnel that had emerged at the defeat of the boggart, allowing Harry to wrap an arm around her shoulders as they walked. They walked in silence for most of the tunnel, Hemione was digesting what this knew boggart meant for her. She always knew that she had gotten relatively over her fear of failure, but it never occurred to her that she might have conquered it completely. This new fear. Well it was pretty terrifying. The fear of being betrayed by  _ her _ Slytherins. The fear of them using her and constantly wanting to hurt her underneath it all. The fear of her never being good enough for them...or anyone for that matter. That wasn’t possible though, because they would never do that. Draco had even said that he didn't want to hurt anyone ever again under Wizards Don't Lie. 

“Granger,” Nott was the first to speak, rousing her from her spinning mind and breaking the suffocating silence, “Want to switch wands?” She laughed a little at that. She stopped in the hallway they were walking down, the small stalactites bright white and shaped like soda straws hanging above them, occasionally dripping water that would roll down her face. 

“Yeah, I expect that would be for the best. I don’t think your wand would like me very much.” She reached into her pocket and grabbed out his wand. They traded in the hallway. 

“Hermione? Are you alright?” Harry asked. She looked at the curious stare of her best friend. His green eyes shining and reflecting the glow of the algae back at her. She almost told him right there. Told him everything including the panic attacks and the anxiety. She almost begged him to understand how much she was suffering, and asked for his help. But they still had so much of the obstacle course to go through. She wasn’t sure he would focus if he knew how much she actually  _ was _ hurting, and Harry not focusing could get him hurt. So, instead of confessing how she and the Slytherins had gotten so close so fast she gave him a strong smile, one that she had perfected over the months since the war. 

“Of course Harry, the boggart just caught me off guard. I forgot that they could hurt you if their form allowed it. Lupin never let them do that.” He nodded in understanding, giving her a reassuring squeeze on her hand. 

“It won't hurt you again,” He said confidently. Running a hand through his dark messy hair, “She can’t hurt you again,” There was no need to mention that he couldn’t promise that the Slytherins wouldn’t hurt her. That unsaid secret was left in the silence of the cave, consumed with the echoes of the dripping water. He couldn’t promise that. Only they could, and they already had. 

“Let’s just go, we only have about thirty minutes left.” She said, sighing slightly in the dark. This was definitely more intense than they originally thought it would be going in. She had the distinct feeling that they were worried about what was coming up, but being the Gryffindor she was she took lead. Reckless, headstrong and needing to prove to herself that she was stronger than this. Stronger than everything she had ever gone through. 

The algae ended a few meters away from where they had stopped to talk, and as she reached the edge she lit her  _ lumos _ , hearing the boys do the same behind her. After a few more minutes of walking they came to a new chamber. 

“ _ Lumos Maxima _ ,” Hermione heard Draco shout as a bright light was thrown into the center of the chamber. They were currently standing at the edge of an underwater lake. There were no other doors in the room, and there was no watercraft available to help them travel over the water. In fact the water seemed to go directly to another cave wall. No way out at all. They were trapped. 

“Did we take a wrong turn?” Harry asked as he approached the water, running a hand through his tousled hair. 

“I don't think so,” Draco said, walking up to stand beside him, “There were no other turns to make,” They stared out over the water. Now that the adrenaline from the last two encounters was wearing down Hermione felt a dull throbbing in her arm. 

Looking down at her arm she noticed that the bite the inferi had taken out of her arm was still bleeding pretty heavily, she just hadn’t noticed until right then. Remembering what Nott had said about not being good at healing spells, and Harry’s relative subpar performance of them as well, Hermione called out Draco's name. He approached her with mild curiosity until she held out her arm. “Salazar Granger! What happened?” The other two boys were there in an instant as Draco raised his wand over her forearm and began casting a basic healing spell. As the spell knitted her flesh together she felt the sensation of someone watching her, and looked up to see Nott gazing at the pair of them with an unreadable look. She blushed and looked back down at where Draco was running his hands over her skin to make sure he hadn’t missed any other injuries. As soon as Draco was finished Hermione shoved her sleeve back down and approached the water with curiosity. 

“We are missing something,” She said slowly, gazing at the water as it sparkled under Draco’s Lumos spell. The other three walked up until they were by her side and they stood there in silence. Hermione started to worry her lower lip as she wracked her brain to figure out what they were missing. 

“Maybe we are just stuck here,” Harry shrugged his shoulders slightly as he moved to grab a rock and skipped it across the water. 

“Potter what did you just say?” Nott asked. 

“I said we are stuck,” He replied looking back at the other three who were currently staring at each other wide eyed. “I know that look, but I'm going to be honest seeing it on more than just Hermione is a little freaky. What do you know?” 

“We’re stuck, Potter,” Draco said, reaching up and grabbing his pendent. 

“He gave us a fucking hint. Smug bastard.” Nott said as he grabbed his. 

“And no one else was clever enough to figure it out! Harry you are a genius,” Hermione yelled before flinging her arms around his neck, knocking his glasses askew. 

“Unbelievable. We figure it out and she gives him a hug.” Draco huffed. 

“Oh, shut it.” Hermione said before wrapping her arms around both of the Slytherins at the same time. They both hesitated before returning the hug. This was the first time they had shown blatant affection in front of another Gryffindor. “They are adder stone’s Harry,” She said as her best friend continued to look confused, when his brows scrunched even more at this admission Draco scoffed. 

“That means, Potter, that if we do this,” Draco raised his own up to his right eye and closed his left, “We should be able to see...There!” Draco said triumphantly and pointed at the wall on the other side of the lake. The rest of the group copied the blond's actions. Sure enough on the opposite side of the water was a magical doorway. “Looks like we are getting wet,” Draco said before wading into the water. It didn’t take long for the other three to follow. They all started swimming towards the door, excited to finally exit this cursed cave. They didn’t notice something was wrong until Hermione felt something wrap around her ankle. She had just enough time to emit a strangled yelp as she was pulled under the water. 

She wordlessly lit her wand, and was horrified to see Grangleroot arms tightening around her ankles. She remembered briefly learning about it in sixth year, it was a plant like animal that often lived in dark damp places, and was semi-aquatic. It often reminded people of mounds of seaweed as it had several arms that were flat and seaweed-esk that they tangled around people before dragging them into the depths, drowning them before consuming them for dinner. She tried feebly to pull herself free but couldn't fight against the creature's strength. There was something they didn’t like...something that she could do to get them to let go. Already slightly out of breath from swimming, and having not gotten a good breath before she was dragged under, Hermione started to panic as her lungs began to burn with her need for air. She yanked harder at the fleshy arm as she started to see black dots in her vision. She couldn’t remember what made them let go! She briefly thought she saw two dark shadows swimming towards her from the surface as the darkness consumed her. 

The next thing Hermione knew she was being held above the water by a strong arm, as her face bounced limply on a shoulder. Hermione sputtered a couple times before breathing in that sweet familiar scent. “Nott?”

“I got you, Granger.” He said as he pulled her closer still swimming towards the edge. She looked over and saw Draco reaching out towards her. She extended her arms and let him pull her to the edge of the hidden door where a small platform was waiting for them. She gasped for breath as Harry pulled himself up on the platform before rushing over to her. He grabbed her face with both hands, his green eyes searching hers. When she nodded he released her face after taking another shaky breath. Meanwhile, Draco dragged Nott out of the water. As soon as he was positioned so he wouldn't fall, Hermione launched herself at Nott burying her face in his shirt. He smelled a little like cave water earthy and stale, but beneath it all was that scent. His scent. As she stayed there he wrapped his arms around her holding her tightly. “I got you, Granger.” He said again. She took several deep calming breaths before nodding and pulling back. 

“Let's get out of here,” She said. They all voiced their agreement before turning and pushing on the door. They were blinded by the bright afternoon sun as the door opened. They emerged from the trunk of a tree that was just outside of the clearing that the class was being held in. As they stood there sopping wet, their peers looked on at them in shock.

“Congratulations Saviors and the Saved. You made it. That will be 300 points each to Gryffindor and Slytherin. Also, you can keep your Adder Stones,” When he said that several groups groaned, realizing where they had gone wrong, “and you don't have to write the essay I am assigning this week on Inferi, Boggarts, and Grangleroot. You heard me! Three topics, three times the length, three times the fun,” Another groan erupted from the group, “Lets go get warmed up!” With that the class filed out of the Forbidden Forest, leaving that blasted cave behind them.

* * *

Later that night, after she had showered and dried, and after she ventured to Madam Pomfrey to get the abrasions on her ankle healed from the Grangleroot, and after she had taken several potions to fight off infection, Hermione laid back on her bed and thought about Nott. In the darkness of her room she thought about his daring rescue. Harry had reminded her that Grangleroot didn’t care for getting cold, so he had dived under and had cast a simple wordless cooling charm and had scared it off of her. This made her face palm at her own ignorance. Once the Slytherins had left the infirmary and Hermione in the capable hands of Harry Potter, Harry had told her that Nott hadn’t hesitated to dive under the waves once they had realized she had gone under. He also mentioned that once Harry had gotten the Grangleroot to release her, Nott had snatched her up and swam to the surface. Harry casually mentioned it was the first time he was genuinely impressed with a Slytherin. Her mind then wandered to Nott swimming with her, holding her head above the surface and her realizing that it was him by his scent alone. 

She pondered on the vaguely familiar scent for a few minutes before she sat up with a start. She  _ knew  _ that scent from Rowena’s Study. It was a scent she had always associated with her get-away in that small room. A smell that she could vaguely catch in other parts of the castle like the library or her favorite clases. Classes that Theo always shared. His scent had permeated the deep fabric of the couches and chairs in Rowena's Study and always made her feel at home. The one place she felt she could relax without being judged. The one place in the castle he had access to before her. Parchment. Spearmint. Something sweet  _ like _ freshly mown grass...except it wasn’t freshly mown grass. It was him. She was so doomed, she thought as she threw her head down her pillow, she had definitely started to fall for Theodore Nott. 


	19. Butterbeers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

The next morning Hermione woke after a fitful night sleep. For the first time in her life she had felt unprepared for an adventure and her subconscious had shown that in her nightmares which had been repeating scenes of being pinned by the boggart as she struggled for her wand, and being drug under waves by the grangleroot. After her fifth attempt at falling back asleep Hermione grabbed her wand and checked the time. Seeing it was just past half five in the morning she grabbed her school bag and took off to the library. Careful to tiptoe out of the common room after she heard the shower running, of course he was already up, she rolled her eyes as she made her way out of the portrait. 

Madam Pince barely raised an eyebrow as Hermione swept into the library, a look of pure determination dawning her pale face. Not more than twenty minutes later she was set up in Rowena’s Study with every book she could find that mentioned inferi, boggarts, and grangleroot. She devoured page after page, making notations, comments, and writing long pages of notes. She had to be better prepared for next time. Maybe, if she asked nicely, Nott would teach her how to cast Fiendfyre. Maybe she should start swimming in the Great Lake so she could get better at holding her breath, and learn to better focus when she had no oxygen. Maybe she could ask Nott to teach her Occlumency so boggarts couldn’t penetrate her mind so easily. That last one would be hard, as she always was a victim to her emotions. Stupid Gryffindor’s and their need to wear their emotions on their dang sleeves. 

She huffed as she made it through her fifth book covering grangleroot and its habitats. She slammed her book and stood pacing furiously. She had failed Harry. She had  _ failed _ him. She had been unprepared, and had made  **him** save  **her** . She was supposed to be strong enough for him to lean on. Strong enough for anyone to lean on and here she was broken, and struggling to defeat the simplest enemies. This wasn’t right, and it wasn’t fair. How could she have gone through so much and fought so hard just to feel so vulnerable after everything? How could she even warrant being called the  _ Brightest Witch of her Age _ if she couldn’t cast a simple patronus? If she couldn’t remember cooling charms were needed to fight off grangleroot? If she allowed a boggart to cause her to hesitate in fear? It had been so easy at twelve to remember what Devils Snare was scared of, why was it so hard now.  _ Because...you are broken. _ The malicious voice echoed in her mind causing the darkness in her soul to expand a little.  _ Because you are not worthy to be a witch _ . 

Hermione grabbed a vase that had sat on one of the end tables and hurled it across the room, loving the sound of the glass shattering across the stone walls. That's what she was, broken into a million tiny pieces, never able to function for the purpose you needed her for. It wasn’t fair! She didn’t deserve to feel like this. It was all supposed to be better. Voldemort was gone, and Bellatrix was dead and still she felt like she had to prove that she deserved to be here. Her mom and dad were gone, and Fred was gone, and Tonks was gone. The people who reminded her that she was strong and smart and brave were gone except for Harry and Ginny, and she couldn’t bring herself to unleash this storm of how she was feeling on them. They needed her to be strong, so they could heal. Then, and only then, she could break. Then she could break and they would never know because she would leave so she would never be a burden, because right now a burden was all that she was. She was so distracted by her tantrum she didn’t hear the door open or hear the swish of robes as a figure came up behind her. 

“Granger?” That damn scent. 

“Nott,” She closed her eyes and took two deep breaths through her nose. Allowing the scent that was already permeated in this room to flow around her. The scent that he carried with him wherever he went. 

“What’s wrong?” She moved before he could get too close, moving back to the desk and gathering up her texts and stacking them. She couldnt have another breakdown in front of him. She couldn’t rely on him to put her back together, she needed to show him she was strong. How could he ever grow to fancy her if he found her weak. 

Weak. Pathetic. Broken. 

He crossed the room behind her and grabbed one of the books. “ _ Aquatic Pests and You _ ?” Raising an eyebrow he grabbed another, “ _ Boggarts: The Hidden Fear _ ? Granger, you know we don’t have to write this essay right?” He asked with a smirk before setting them back in her neat stack. 

“There not for the essay, there for personal research,” She said, still refusing to make eye contact with him. 

“Oh,” he said tilting his mouth down as he examined the books, “All over what we faced yesterday?” 

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“It doesn’t matter.” She said walking towards the door. Nott caught her arm right above her elbow and turned her towards him. His blue eyes scanned her face as her breathing began to pick up.  _ Don’t break down _ , she thought to herself blinking back the pressure that was building behind her eyes. 

“I think it does, Granger.” He prodded holding tightly. 

“You wont understand!” She practically yelled, ripping her arm from his grip as she tried to balance the books she had in her hand. Intending to reread them again in the privacy of her room. 

“Then explain it to me!” His voice was pleading.

“I can’t fail him again! I can’t.”

“What the bloody hell are you talking about. Fail who?”

“Harry! I failed when we got captured and taken to that blasted Manor. If I had been quicker I could have apparated us out, or stopped him from saying the taboo. I failed him when we got stuck down in Gringotts! It was my plan that didn’t work! I failed him again when I didn’t know it was Ravenclaw's Diadem. I failed him when I couldn’t fight off the inferi. I failed him when I couldn’t fight the Grangleroot off of me, he should never have swam to get me. You shouldn’t have either, you could have been hurt. I couldn’t even fight a boggart, something we have known how to face since third year. I was frozen in fear...what kind of Gryffindor is frozen in fear? I have to prepare. I have to be better prepared for him. He needs me to be stronger for him and I have spent half this year under the portrait of Merlin's tower, or crying in an alcove. I can’t be weak anymore.”

She stopped to take a breath and turned to look anywhere but Notts face. He had been staring at her with confusion the entire time she had spoken. Quiet and contemplative, stoic and observing. 

“Granger,” he said softly, placing a hand on her back, “It’s ok that you had to rely on someone else. It’s ok to rely on someone instead of feeling like you have to control every situation you are in.” Hermione kept looking at the wall as he spoke, refusing to acknowledge him. Refusing to believe that even for a second she could lean on someone else. 

“You saved me from the inferi, you know that? You stopped one from hitting me, and you made that wall of fire which stopped more than half of them from getting closer. Malfoy told me he and Potter couldn’t bring themselves to understand why the Dark Lord was there, you pushed them out of the way. You can’t help it that you lost your wand. As for the Grangleroot. I know very few people who don’t panic a little while they are being drug under water with no air.”

“He has relied on me for so long, I can’t let him down again.” She released a shaky breath before looking at Notts face. Taking in the curly waves of his dark hair as it fell onto his forehead. The soft curve of his lip as they were drawn in a line of concern. The way his brows furrowed just slightly over his cerulean eyes. “You don’t understand, I-I have to be better.” 

“No you don’t. You have suffered and you have every right to try and conquer what you have gone through on your own time. It’s ok to be rescued every once in a while, and I will always be happy to be your savior.” He lowered his hand from her back and dropped it back down to his side. “Don’t let anyone discredit what you have gone through, or how you feel. Don’t let anyone tell you that you are failing because you hesitate, or because you can’t remember one fact about one creature when you have stored millions over the years.” He reached up and brushed a wayward curl off of her neck, his fingers barely trailing over the skin there making her shudder as they passed. 

“When you conquer this, because I  _ know _ you will, we will be just as happy to be the ones that get rescued. Until then it's ok to lean on Draco and me for a little while.” He looked into her eyes then. Time stopped as they stared at each other, locked away from the world and expectations that awaited her outside this room. She nodded, understanding for the first time in a long time that it was ok to be broken for a little while, especially when you had friends that could help put you back together when it was time. She watched as he reached into his bag and pulled out an orange, “You missed breakfast again.” She took it with a small smile. “Potter was looking for you, something about getting a celebratory butterbeer with him. He invited us, Draco and me, to come along as well. Come on, let's go.” 

“O-ok.” She said as she gathered her bag. She threw it over her shoulder before remembering something that made her pause, “One sec.” She turned back around and cast a quick repairing spell on the glass vase and put it back on the end table it sat on. Nott walked up behind her, setting one arm on her left shoulder he raised his wand so his right arm came up beside her. Standing there, his chest nearly touching her back, she thought she could hear his breathing. 

Slow and steady. 

In and out.

A sharp contrast to her widely beating heart. 

With a complex movement of his wand a small bouquet of blue hollyhocks filled the vase. Nott then added some water as a finishing touch. 

“They’re beautiful,” Hermione breathed as she stared at the flowers. 

“They’re my favorite.” He said close to her ear. Hermione raised her wand and cast a quick preservation charm. They looked at each other again, Hermione gazing slightly over her shoulder, before quickly lowering her gaze feeling the blush erupt over her cheeks. 

“Come on,” Nott whispered in the quiet of the study, “Malfoy and Potter are waiting downstairs near the Great Hall.” 

“Nott?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“I’ve told you before Granger. Anytime.” With that he put a warm hand on the small of her back and escorted her to the Great Hall where they were joined by their individual best friends to celebrate over a pint of butterbeers. The group chatted as they walked, discussing everything from their upcoming potions assignment, to Draco’s obscenely spoiled childhood. 

The group was joined by a number of other eighth years as the day dragged on. Eventually, Zabini paid for everyone to have a shot, as Hermione and Luna tried to keep everyone from getting too rowdy. Ginny and Harry snuck off to find a quiet place to celebrate in their own way, leaving Hermione, Luna, Blaise, Neville, Theo, Dean, and Draco sharing drinks.

“This isn’t awkward at all,” Neville smiled as he took another long drink of his butterbeer.

“Is it?” Draco asked, while throwing a chip into Blaise’s waiting mouth, “I couldn’t tell.”

“Neville’s right. This is slightly awkward, but that’s because Draco has something on his mind.” Luna’s airy voice barely drifted over the dinn of the Three Broomsticks. 

“What are you talking about?” Draco demanded. 

“I wouldn’t lie, she can always tell when you do.” Hermione provided helpfully as she sipped her own butterbeer.

“Alright, Lovegood. I do have something on my mind, but I didn’t want to say it here.” Draco’s face turned red as he ran his hands through his blond hair. “Can I talk to you and Dean outside for a second?”

“Sure,” Luna said, standing and grabbing Dean's hand as he started to weakly protest. Hermione heard Dean mumble something under his breath as he stood before being dragged out behind Luna who followed Draco outside into the cool air. 

“What was that about?” Hermione asked the table.

“I think Malfoy is going to apologize to them like he did you.” Nott casually said as he motioned to the waitress for a check. 

“Oh,” Hermione said, eyes going wide as she stared at the door, willing herself to have x-ray vision. 

“Malfoy is something else now-a-days, huh?” Neville mentioned standing from the table and stretched his long figure.

“Yeah, he really is.”

“Don’t let him hear you say that, Granger, it will go straight to his head.” Blaise flashed Hermione a wide smile before bumping shoulders with Nott. “C’mon Nott, I can pay for this.”

“You can get the next one.” Nott threw down entirely too many galleons as he stood and wrapped his coat around his shoulders.

“You said that last time.”

“Yeah, but this time I got to use the family vaults to pay for a muggleborn and two half-blood’s drinks.” Nott smiled slightly at her, letting his dimple show as he raised an eyebrow, “I honestly cannot think of a better way to spend good ol William’s money, can you?” 

Blaise let out a deep chuckle as he wrapped an arm around Hermione’s shoulders. “Careful Granger, or he might just  _ give  _ you access to his vaults just to stick it to his father.” Hermione let Blaise lead her out of the smokey tavern and into the dark autumn night. They saw Draco, Luna and Dean down the street. Currently Luna was giving Draco a long hug while Dean had his hand on his shoulder. “Well, at least it looks like they have forgiven him.” Blaise said with a long sigh, “That’s one less thing for him to feel guilty over.”

“Yeah,” Nott said, coming up to stand beside them, “One less thing.” His voice was an odd mixture of cold and warm. Hermione could see where there was relief for his friend written clearly on his face, but she couldn’t help but think that there was something she was missing buried deep under his words. She looked at him until he made eye contact with her, royal blue eyes giving nothing away. “Let’s go back to the castle and warm up, yeah? They’ll follow after too long.” With that he started back up the winding path towards the gates of Hogwarts. 


	20. Don't Mess with A Weasley

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Word of the four teenagers' success had raced around the castle after that Saturday, but when the quartet were seen hanging out at the three broomsticks on Sunday the rumors spread more like wildfire. They had become icons in a way, more so than they already were. It was nice for Draco and Nott who were not used to being in the light in a good fashion. It would have been perfect if it hadn’t been for one slightly jealous Ron. When he had learned that there had been NO spiders in the cave he was pissed at his own cowardice, but he was even more pissed at the Slytherin’s glory which he was not used to being left out on. He had taken to trying to convince Hermione to go on dates with him with a renewed fury which she had repeatedly and politely declined every time he had asked. The redhead was getting increasingly frustrated, and it was during one of these spats that she found herself the night before Christmas break, with multiple eyes surrounding her in the Great Hall.

“Why not Hermione?” Ron nearly yelled at her as she crossed her arms trying to avoid looking at him. This was the first time he had actually questioned her decision. Hermione could feel her emotions build, but unlike the drowning feeling she got when she would have a panic attack this was a more  _ normal  _ feeling. This was the feeling of having a row with Ronald Weasley, and she was not backing down. 

“Because Ronald I said no!” She yelled back, getting more and more irritated. Nott and Draco had to have a late Slytherin team practice and Harry had not yet made it down to dinner with Ginny as they were busy ‘studying’ for a Transfiguration practical next week. She knew this was why Ron was being so aggressive, she was ‘defenseless’ and alone. 

“I have asked you out like ten times, and you keep saying no. Why?” He looked at her confused as she met his blue eyes with her own. They were standing in between the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw tables. Ron had several inches on her and was using it to his advantage, but Hermione just stood with her head high and tried to not feel small next to him. 

“I just don't want to.”

“You seemed to want to before! What changed? You have acted differently since you have been with the serpents.” As they stood there more of the Great Hall began curiously watching the spat between two thirds of the precious golden trio. Hermione hated this. She hated the fame that came with helping Harry. She didn’t want the notoriety she just wanted to save her friend. Ron on the other hand lived for it, and soaked it up like a sunflower following its name sake through the sky. That was why he had confronted her in the Great Hall and she knew it. He wanted the attention and the drama, and he didn’t care that he was putting her on the spot to get it. 

“I have been acting differently long before I began spending time with them! You were just too self absorbed to notice.” She yelled, remembering Notts words from months ago in the alcove. 

Ron scoffed and rolled his eyes, “Do you fancy them?” He asked, his blue eyes narrowed as he spoke, “Do you fancy Malfoy? Do your knickers get wet thinking about doing something bad with the enemy?” He was practically spitting fire when he finished his rant. There were several gasps from around her as more people had started filing into the Great Hall. Ron let a smug grin erupt on his face.

“It doesn’t matter if it does!” She screeched, “Because what gets my knickers wet has nothing to do with you! I tried letting you down easy Ron, but you can't take a hint. I do not fancy you, and from the way you have been acting lately I am not sure I would want to be your friend anymore. You cant let go of the past.” Harry and Ginny both walked into the Great Hall at this point, and seeing Hermione's hair currently standing up on end with residual pent-up magical energy they both moved quickly to the two squabbling Gryffindors. 

“Damn it Hermione, I was just trying to protect you from  _ them. _ ”

“Who?” asked Harry as he moved to stand off to the side of the two friends as they stared at each other. 

“The sodding serpents,” Ron roared as he threw his hands up in frustation, “Why am I the only one not falling for the fucking snake charms?” He advanced towards Hermione quickly, but was halted when Harry stepped forward, emerald eyes flashing as he pushed himself between Hermione and Ron. 

“You are gonna want to back the fuck up, mate.” Harry said with an eerie calmness to his voice. Ron faltered for a second, staring at his best friend. 

“Harry, I appreciate it but I think I can handle this!” Hermione said, trying to force her way back between her the two boys. Neither seemed to hear her, having their own private battle now. 

“You are really going to take their side? After everything we’ve been through. All the shite I've sacrificed for you?” Ron said disbelievingly. His blue eyes burned with inner fire as he stared at his best friends, who for the first time in his life stood on the opposing side. 

“You come towards my sister like that again, and you are going to learn why half the wizarding world fears me.” Harry growled before motioning behind him towards Hermione, “I am taking Hermione's side, because hers is the right side. I am done with all this fighting. I’ve been fighting my whole damned life. First the Dursleys, then Voldemort, and now this stupid house war. I am done!” Harry’s voice was raised which caused all the students to quiet down and really listen to the argument currently taking place with the Boy-Who-Lived-Twice and his best mate. The attention had caused Hermione's face to flush as she tried to hide behind her bushy hair, “Hermiones the only one who seems to understand that we were all kids when this happened. We were forced to choose sides and we fought because choices were made for us, and if we didn't fight we died. I am done fighting, and I am not going to let anyone ruin the peace that Lupin and Fred died to achieve.” 

Hermione was so entranced in the way Harry was defending her and the Slytherins that she almost didn’t notice the arm that was casually slung around her shoulders. She looked up to see the pale face of Draco Malfoy, still wet from his shower after practice. A flash caught her eye, and she glanced down to see his wand in his hand, currently letting out the occasional spark of uncontrolled magic. “You might want to listen to your friend.” Draco drawled with an eerie tone to his voice that matched Harry’s, “I would hate to ruin my probation by hexing you Weasel.” 

Ron’s eyes flicked from Draco’s face to his arm wrapped securely around Hermione's shoulder and shook his head. “I fucking knew it, you have been shagging Malfoy,” Nott had made his appearance as he casually walked up to join the group, his dark hair hanging in his eyes from the weight of the water. His pale blue button up shirt was sticking to his chest from water tension as his eyes slowly flicked from Ron to Draco to Hermione and back to Ron. 

“I  _ told  _ you. It doesn’t matter what I do anymore. I am independent of you...you big redheaded...redheaded…”

“Git”

“Prat,”

Nott and Draco supplied, similar to the way they had when she had been trying to find the right word to describe Pansy all those weeks ago. Hermione waved her hands in agreement as she began to speak again,“I am my own person.” Hermione walked forward then, pushing Harry to the side. She was done. Done hiding behind her hair, and being polite. She was done letting her anxiety and fear of hurting someone let Ron control how she spoke. She poked her finger into Rons chest causing him to back up. “They are not the enemy anymore and I don't know what we can say to make you understand that!”

“They are the enemy, their parents killed our families and friends. Killed Fred.” Hermione flinched slightly, but didn’t back down.

“And our families and friends killed theirs! It was a war! It was fought, we won and it’s over. I will not sit here and let you constantly remind us of a past that we are trying so hard to move forward from. They are my friends, and if you cannot start acting civilly around them then that means you have no place in my life!” She was screaming now. Standing tall and proud like the Gryffindor she was as she stared down Ron. 

The livid redhead looked like he was about to say something else before a giant bat shaped bogey flew out of his nose. Reeling in pain, Ron ran from the Great Hall with two more bats flapping wildly behind him. The four companions looked around for the caster of the hex and upon confirming that they hadn’t produced it they turned to look for the origins of the spell. Standing to the side wand raised was a very proud looking Ginny Weasley.

“Nice going, Red.” Nott nodded to her as she slowly lowered her wand.

“Yeah, well he wouldn't shut up,” She said shrugging her shoulders and started walking down towards the open seats at the Gryffindor table, Harry trailing behind. 

Hermione looked at Draco and Nott and noticed that both of them had remained standing still. Nott looked upset, his eyes now locked on Draco’s as a silent war was being played across both boy’s near stone still features. Nott slowly shook his head before rolling his eyes and walking briskly over to the Slytherin table.

“Draco-”

“I can't, Granger.” He responded sharply. Seeing her wince at his tone, he let out a long breath before saying gently, “I cant.” He then stalked over to sit down next to Nott at the Slytherin table. 

Hermione watched him go before she went to sit by the other Gryffidors as the mail arrived. Pigwidgeon was quite upset that Ron was not at his usual place and stalked around the table twice before taking off again in search of his target. Harry’s new owl Bubo, a small screech owl, was currently snacking on some chicken it had grabbed off his plate. Hermione watched the little bird with interest as it ruffled its feathers and leaned into Harry’s hand. She was considering getting an owl since Crookshanks had been taken by her parents when they left for Australia, but couldn't bring herself to replace her grumpy familiar just yet.

She was pulled from her thoughts when there was a shattering of glass from across the room. Owls that were trying to gather a light snack as a reward flew into the air with angry hoots and screeches as all eyes turned towards the Slytherin table. Standing there shoulders back in a defensive posture was the normally silent Theodore Nott, red faced and disheveled. Every piece of glassware on the table had been shattered in what appeared to be an outburst of accidental magic. Draco Malfoy and Blaise Zabini were both trying to calm him down as he stared at a sheet of pale yellow parchment.

Nott threw off Draco’s calming hands and glared at his friend, before saying something low enough that even in the silence of the room the words only reached Malfoy’s ears. Draco took a step back as if he had been hit, before his eyes flicked over to meet Hermione’s. The gesture was not missed by Nott and his blue eyes flicked up to meet hers as well. She looked at both boys, brows furrowed in confusion and concern wishing beyond reason that she could see what shade of blue Nott’s eyes were. Nott backed away from Draco, dropping the parchment and casting a silent wandless spell causing the page to erupt into flames. Sending one last glance her way he was out of the Great Hall before the ashes touched the stone floor. Draco followed not long after at a slower pace.

“What the bloody hell was that?” Ginny asked. 

“I don’t know. Looks like Nott didn't like whatever news he just recieved.” Harry said as he glanced between the Slytherin table and his curly haired best friend. Ginny noticed Hermione's concerned look and half guided her, half yanked her aside away from Harry and the rest of the Gryffindors until they were standing at the door. 

“Hermione, what's been going on with you and Malfoy?”

“I-nothing. We haven't been doing anything…” Hermione let out a small self deprecating laugh, “I’ve actually started to fancy Nott.” She said glancing at the Great Hall door. 

“Hermione...for the brightest witch of our age you are such an idiot.” Hermione looked at her like she was crazy causing Ginny to roll her hazel eyes and scoff. “Look, it's none of my business but I think you two would be great together. You both just need a little push so you can take that leap. Right now it really looks like he could use someone to talk to. So, go and find him.” The copper haired girl then gave Hermione a small nudge towards the door, and that was all she needed. 

Hermione summoned her bag from where she had left it at the table and immediately ran out after Nott. She searched her common room, the library, and the study room before giving up in the last location and slumping down into the couch beneath the window. There, she stared out into the night and watched as the moon rose above the trees of the Forbidden Forest. She was about to go find Luna, and force the ditzy Ravenclaw to tell her where Nott disappeared to when he needed to think, but before she could do that the door to the study room opened revealing a very haggard looking Draco. 

“Oh...hey,” He said when he saw her there. 

“Hi,” She replied as she turned to face him. He hesitated in the door for a second, and she wondered if he was just going to turn around and leave her before he shook his head and walked in closing the door quietly behind him. “Is he ok?” 

“No.” 

“Are you ok?”

“No.” His voice choked on that word and when she looked up she saw his eyes were bloodshot. 

“Talk to me,” She said as she scooted down the couch making room for him to come and sit by her. He did, slouching down and running his hands over his face and into his hair. 

“If I talk to you, you have to promise me you wont tell Theo what I tell you. He would never forgive me if he found out it was me and I can't lose him. Not after everything.” Draco was staring at the fire in front of them, his eyes looking like pools of mercury as the light reflected off of his irises. 

“This is what friends are for Draco, of course I promise.”

“He thinks....He thinks we are  _ together _ .” He said motioning between the two of them with his hand. 

“ _ Together _ Together?”

“Yeah. I tried to tell him that we weren't but after what Weasley said...he is convinced I lied to him. I don't lie to him, I never have. He was my only friend during the war. After the Dark Lord gave me my task sixth year Theo taught me Occulemcy… it helped. I think he might actually be better at it than Snape was.” He gave a humorless chuckle before continuing, “He’s convinced you...well that you have a thing for me.” 

“But...and I mean no offense by this Draco, I don’t find you attractive at all. You are just...too  _ you _ .” He smiled at her, a small pitiful smile that reminded her their friend was out there somewhere and that they were here together. 

“I get that. Really I do, but Theo doesn't. He has been told several times by people that he is a failure...his confidence was shattered before he ever really had it.” Draco lowered his head from the fire and pulled his wand, summoning a bouncy ball and playing with it between his hands. 

“Where is he?”

“Getting drunk.” When Hermione peered at him out of the corner of her eye Draco drug his hand down his face before resuming his rhythmic bouncy ball bouncing, “The letter was from his father in Azkaban. Snuck it out through some bloke who just started training in the prison. Bloody idiot. Once I send a letter to the Minister his career is going to be over before it ever begins.” Draco’s eyes were murderous as he caught the ball and held it in a clenched fist, and for the first time since their eighth year had started she was reminded of the ruthless boy he had been all those years before. 

“Why did the letter upset him so much? It’s just a letter.” She asked, confusion caused her eyebrows to draw together as she faced Draco again. 

“His father wanted to make sure Theo remembered that he was now  _ Lord _ Nott. Wanted to remind him of all the ways he needed to uphold the family name. The expectations that one of such pure-blooded breeding had to maintain.” Draco scoffed and rolled his eyes, “He had heard some unfortunate rumors about Theodore defending a Mudblood.” Hermione knew the slur was said as a direct quote from the letter, but still she flinched. She also had begun to realize that the Mudblood in question was probably her. 

“Where is he now? He wasn’t in the common room when I went there looking for him.”

“He had to scream at me for a good thirty minutes and steal my firewhiskey first, but I suspect he is back in your common room now drinking himself into oblivion.”

“I am going to go and talk to him,” She said standing. Feeling slightly guilty for leaving Draco alone she reached into her bag and grabbed a sugar quill. They had found through their months of friendship that they both had an unhealthy addiction to the sugary treats, and they were often used as peace offerings when debates got a tad too spirited. She handed it to him and gave him a smile. 

“He loves you, you know?” Hermiones heart stopped as she stared at Draco, feeling like she had misheard and wanting nothing more than for him to verify that she hadn't. She had convinced herself that Nott couldn’t like her, but hearing his best friend confide in her Notts feelings caused her heart to beat erratically and her breath to hitch. “Has since before second year I think. I called you a Mudblood in the common room that year and he punched me square in the jaw. It hurt like hell…” Malfoy laughed as he rubbed his jaw, remembering the long forgotten pain. 

“He has known how to throw a good punch for years, learned from his old man before a boy should. After that day none of us would call you that word around him. Goyle forgot that special rule this year...the day Parkinson said it in Charms. Theo caught them making fun of you in the hall. I thought Theo was going to kill him, I haven't been that scared for someone since the war.” She remembered back to the first day Nott had found her crying under the portrait, his face covered in bruises. He had told her it was nothing, and not to worry about it. That she wouldnt understand. She had screamed at him, and the whole reason he was hurt was because he had defended her. Why hadn’t he told her what he had done?

“Don’t hurt him,” Draco continued, “He has been hurt by every person in his life and I don’t know if he can take anymore. If you want to be with him fine....just  _ please  _ don't hurt him.” Hermione could pinch herself, Draco Malfoy, pureblood Prince of Slytherin was  **begging** her. Instead she gave him a hug and upon feeling him return it she ran to the door determined to finally confront Theodore Nott. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun shout out to the old Clash of the Titans with the name Bubo.  
> Also I would like to say thank you to everyone for their awesome reviews and comments. I am almost done writing this story so you can expect regular updates on Wednesday and Sunday with the occasional bonus chapter if people want one until the story is done!


	21. Fuck It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione opened the door to the Head of House common room and was immediately hit with the stinging smell of firewhiskey. Nott was currently sitting on the loveseat, and from the doorway she could just make out his silhouette, the only light coming in was the moon from the small window in the kitchenette. His hand was propped up on the armrest, balancing a crystal tumbler gently in his hand. She raised her wand and lit the fireplace bathing his angular face with bright yellow light. 

“Draco, I told you I didn't want to talk to you anymore.” He sounded tired. His voice was ragged as if it had been damaged from screaming, and he didn't even raise his face to look at her. Just lifted the crystal tumbler with amber colored liquid to his lips and started to take another drink.

“ _Accio firewhiskey_. So, since you are using his first name I will assume you are emotionally distressed.” She started smartly as she crossed the room, grabbing the glass of whiskey from the air and downing it in one hard swallow. She relished in the burn as it slid down her throat knowing that she was going to need the liquid courage tonight. 

A small sad smirk appeared on the side of his face, “No, Granger. I am just tired. Where have you been?” 

“Rowena’s Study.” His head shot up and his eyes narrowed at her then. He stood slowly from the couch, teetering as he got his bearings underneath him before starting across the room. Hermione was too fast though, and just as he was about to slam his bedroom door shut in front of her she held out her hand keeping it open. 

“We need to talk.” She said as she pushed her way past him, crossed into his room and plopped herself on the chest at the foot of his bed. She folded her arms in front of her and looked up at him. He had his head hanging down in front of him so his bangs blocked his eyes. His hands were at his sides currently clenching and unclenching into fists, and his breathing was becoming more erratic. The door closed quietly behind him.

“Granger...get out.” He had never had anything less than warmth in his voice towards her, so the sudden icy quality to his timber threw her off guard for a moment. She knew from what Malfoy had told her that Nott had a dark side. A side that apparently made an appearance in defense of her. She had never seen it and something in his voice rattled a cage in her that screamed a warning after years of fighting. But this was _Nott_ , and he had never hurt her. He would never hurt her. So, squaring her shoulders and keeping her wand in hand just in case she stayed put. 

“No. I am not going anywhere until you talk to me.” Her mouth was a thin line as determination lit her face. 

“I don’t want to talk to you right now, or Draco for that matter. Go back to Rowena’s Study and be with him. I just want to drink or sleep, but since you stole my fucking firewhiskey I guess I will settle for the latter.” He said the icy tone dropping in temperature until she was sure she was going to get frostbite from it alone. 

“Talk to me and I will leave.”

“Why cant you just fucking go you goddamned Gryffindor. Leave it for once in your fucking life.” He looked up at her then, his blue eyes blazing and a deep rich blue that reminded her of storm clouds. His strong jaw was squared as his face was pulled into a snarl. He looked angry, but there was something just below the surface. When she searched his eyes she could see that buried just below the anger was pain that he was trying to hide. 

“Why did you get in a fist fight with Goyle?” He stared at her for a second before letting out a sound akin to a growl. 

“It doesn’t matter!” He said as he turned his face away from her. “It has never mattered.” 

“I think it does matter,” She heard him scoff a little as she repeated words back to him that he had spoken months ago,“and friends don't leave each other when the other is hurting.” She said standing so she could face him. She tossed her wand so it landed on the chest she had just vacated. She was partially scared of releasing accidental magic as she could feel her skin tingling as her emotions became more uncontrollable, but more importantly she wanted Nott to see how much she trusted him. The sound of her wand clattering to the ground seemed to work its way through him before he released a low sound like a wounded animal and spoke again. 

“ _Please_ , I can't do this anymore.” The anger in his face melted, and he just looked broken. He was pleading with her and his voice had lost its ice until he sounded slightly like a small child.

“Do what?” She braved.

“I can’t be second.”

“What do you mean?” She crossed the room, placing her small hands on his chest, but he avoided eye contact as she got closer. Her chocolate brown eyes searched his face, trying to get him to look at her; and for a second she thought that he might. His heartbeat under her hand sped up and she relished in feeling the strong _badum_ _badum_ under her palm. One moment it felt like he was leaning into her touch, as if he could rest against her like she was a strong tree. Then, he threw her hand off of his chest and stormed over to his bed. 

He turned to face her, his blue eyes still the strong blue of storm clouds over an untamable ocean as he marched back and forth between the tiny space of his bed and desk. He waved his arms frantically as he started yelling, “I can’t be second to him. All my life I have been. I was second to him when it came to impressing our fathers. ‘ _Why cant you be more like Draco, Theo? Draco is a good lad, everything a pureblood heir_ **_should_ ** _be. See how he mocks that muggle!_ ’” Nott was frantic as he quoted his father, “I was second when it came to quidditch, even when we knew I was the better flyer. _Fuck_ ! Even you thought that he was second in the class. I have always surpassed him in almost every course we took together, but no one noticed me! No one could with his flamboyant tendencies and obnoxious personality. Did you know that the only course he could beat me in was Potions?” Nott ran his hands down his face and took a deep breath before turning to her, locking eyes. His eyes held so much emotion in them she released an involuntary breath. She had never seen him this way, as he was always so careful to guard his emotions, but now it was like all his walls were down. He looked at her sadly for a moment before continuing in a quiet voice. “But you know what Granger, I could have lived being second to him in every aspect of my life as long as _you_ noticed me. As long as I could have mattered to you. I mean I matter to you as your friend but not as-”

“Nott, I did notice you,” He released a humorous chuckle and rounded on her. Standing several feet away he began to run his hands through his hair. To say she fancied the boy before was one thing, but seeing him like this...so raw...she felt her feelings grow. When he spoke again his voice was hard and left no room for argument, and Hermione just stared. 

“No, you didn't. When we were on the carriage you didn't notice me. I spoke first and you even thought he would be Head Boy. Who would think about silent Theodore Nott in the background when there was Draco Malfoy to consider? How could _I_ possibly be Head Boy?!? When you came to Rowena’s Study, you saw him first. You grabbed his hand first to dance. You fell asleep with him on the couch. You stood in the Great Hall and let him hold you. 

“You want to know why I got into a fist fight with Goyle? Because I couldn’t stand to hear what they were saying about you. What they have always said about you. Sure, Malfoy is better now and I am thankful he has seen the light every fucking day, but yet again even though I saw it before him I am second. No matter what has been told to me about how I should act or how I should behave, you have always made me second guess it. You and my mum. I knew muggle-borns were no less than I was years before him, but when it came down to it you chose him instead of me!”

“Nott…”

“Stop calling me that! You call him Draco now why do I have to be Nott? Why can’t I be Theo?” She saw the tear slip from the corner of his eye. He took a shuddering breath, his shoulders slumped forward in defeat. In the moment that it took him to notice his tears had begun to escape the cool mask he wore all year was back in place, he squared his shoulders and bit his bottom lip in frustration. He took several deep breaths and Hermione saw the walls shift behind his eyes. 

“Stop it!” She screamed at him. He stared up at her, as she saw another wall slide into place. “Dont block me out! Don't occlude please.” It was too late. She saw him slowly retreat to a safe place where he couldn’t be hurt. Where every thing that ever caused him pain was locked behind several walls and put in boxes with lead lids. These thoughts and memories were then dropped down into the parts of his mind where he didn’t have to think about it anymore. She couldn't help herself as she started to cry hot tears of frustration. 

“I noticed you.” He said quietly as another wall was about to shift into place. He looked down at the floor in front of him, his hands limp at his sides, “I noticed you on the train when you were looking for Longbottom’s toad. When you spent hours in the library second year looking for Slytherin’s Monster. When you used the time-turner third year,” She looked up at him trying to see him clearly through the haze of tears. _He knew about the damn Time-turner...how?_ She didn't have time to dwell on this question because he continued, “I noticed you _before_ the Yule Ball. When you stared at Krum because you found him attractive. When you would sneak glances at him when you thought no one was looking. I was...I was looking. I was so pissed when you did that to your hair just so you could look pretty for him. Don't you realize how beautiful you already were?” He looked at her then, blue eyes piercing her soul as they searched for an answer to the question he had posed. When she offered none he continued. 

“I noticed you when you perfected the charm on the fake galleons. When you cried over Weasley and the blond girl.” He took in a shuddering breath as the wall tried to shift into place. He was holding it back, waiting for something. “Why couldn't _you_ notice _me_ , Hermione?” He was whispering now his voice strangled with raw emotion, and the way her name sounded coming from his lips caused a shiver to roll up her spine. It felt right.

Remembering the night when he stumbled into their common room drunk Hermione had an idea. It was a crazy idea and was putting herself up for possible heartbreak but she couldn't figure out any other way to make him see what he meant to her. Taking a step towards him, dropping her eyes because she was scared to see him when she revealed her secret, Hermione began to speak quietly, “Do you know what I smell when I breathe in Amortentia?” He waited, she glanced up and saw his eyes lightening in color before her as his expression remained guarded not daring to hope. “I smell your spearmint toothpaste and the way the scent of parchment clings to your shirt after you spend hours in the library. Those would be enough, but I smell one other thing...I used to think it was freshly mown grass, but now I know that something is inexplicably _you_. I didn’t realize it was you until this year, the night after you saved me from the water...but you are my Amortentia. I didn’t know the potion was pointing me towards you, but it was.

“I-I am sorry I didn't notice you sooner. But this year I have noticed you. You are all I have noticed. Every second of every day for weeks I’ve noticed nothing but the color of your eyes and the way you make me feel. I’ve noticed how soft your hair looks and how strong you are. I noticed you trying to cast the Patronus when no ones looking, and how you leave the Great Hall after lunch. I notice how sometimes when you think I see you vulnerable, you put up extra walls to make sure you block the emotions.” 

She was looking at him again, his eyes had lightened to a beautiful cerulean. Almost that perfect shade of forget-me-not that she had seen in the alcove. When he made no move to come towards her she started feeling anxious and lowered her gaze from him before fiddling with the edge of her jumper sleeves. Feeling like she had waited too long and had lost her chance with the one person who might understand her and all her quirks. Someone who would study with her for hours and not judge her for the ink stains that sometimes smudged her face. She figured it was what she deserved for making him wait while she gathered her courage. She let a few more tears fall before backing towards the door. “I...I am sorry it took me so long Theo.”

As soon as his name passed from her lips she heard him let out a low and strangled groan followed by a husky, “Fuck it,” When she looked up he had advanced towards her crossing the entire length of his room in two long strides. 

He grabbed her face on either side with his large hands and lowered his lips to hers. She expected the kiss to be hasty and rough as all kisses she had ever shared were, but this one was slow and soft. As soon as his lips touched hers, Hermione knew she was home. It was like fireworks were going off inside her lower stomach, and the residual sparkles were layered in every place his hands touched. She tasted the spearmint from his toothpaste and the spice of the whiskey and let out a low moan that he captured greedily. He took his time moving against her mouth and she readily responded moving one hand up to tangle lightly into his dark hair as the other rested on his waist. When she tugged his locks he released a sound akin to a growl and tried to lighten the kisses only to have her shove his face back against her. He pushed forward with a grunt as he moved his mouth on hers in a powerful dance that lit a fire under her skin. After several moments his hands sunk down to her waist and he tried to gently push her off. 

“Granger, I should have done that when Zabini first dared me too. But I was scared, self preservation and all that… and now- now we can’t.” He said lowering his forehead to rest against hers. He was breathing hard and she struggled to think clearly as the haze of need began to lift.

“Why can’t we?” She asked breathlessly, trying in vain to capture his lips again. 

“Malfoy-”

“You are smart enough to realize I have no attraction to the blond ferret.” She said, a small smirk she had learned from _her_ Slytherins forming on her lips. 

“You...you mean...you’re not-”

“No...we’re not, never have been and never will be. Now if you would still rather not kiss me I’ll just lea-” She couldn't finish the sentence because his mouth was on hers once again, only this time the gentle kisses were replaced by more ferocious demanding ones. He pushed her into the door and she relished in the sting of the wood against her as he began sliding his tongue against her lips. She opened her mouth needing to taste him completely and she wasn’t disappointed. Amongst the fire whiskey and toothpaste was something that was inexplicably Theo. It reminded her of his scent and she moaned as her tongue danced in his mouth. His hands came up and tangled into her hair, holding tightly to the messy curls that he loved so much. 

When one of his hands dropped to her waist and started to move up her shirt she realized where this would lead and using _every_ last bit of will power she pulled away, “Theo...how...how drunk are you?” She asked as he moved to kiss along her neck making goosebumps kiss her flesh. He moaned into her neck, and licked the flesh there sucking lightly but not leaving a mark. 

“Not too drunk...just enough to still know what I'm doing,” He said as he started to lick the pulse point just below her ear. The hot breath on the wet spot on her neck caused an involuntary shiver to raise down her spine. 

“I want this Theo, but not like this. Not with you all tipsy on firewhiskey” She moaned as he kissed her again, biting the soft flesh below her ear before gently pushing him off. 

He brushed a curl that had fallen into her face back on her forehead before placing a small kiss there. He nodded slowly before looking at her seriously, “Just so you know I am super fucking disappointed in my decision to drink.” He nipped her neck lightly one more time before stepping fully back. 

“I’ll see you in the morning.” She reached for the door and pulled on the handle, but he grabbed her hand to stop her. 

“Please don't go...we don't have to do anything else...I just...please.” His eyes were that irresistible shade of forget-me-not blue again. Her new favorite color. She gave him a small shy smile before toeing off her shoes and climbing into his bed fully clothed. She smirked as she noticed her Gryffindor blanket was currently covering the Nott family crest on his quilt.

“Just for tonight, and no funny business Nott or I may sick Ginny on you,” 

“Wow, threatening me with Red? Really needed to pull out the big wands, huh?” He asked climbing in next to her, “I promise, no funny business.” He rolled on his side to face her and reached out slowly to grab her hand, winding their fingers together and resting them on the pillow next to his head before closing his eyes. Hermione watched him as he started to drift off to sleep and the worries of his day slowly melted from his face. She let a large grin spread across her face as she inched closer to him placing a small kiss on his nose, and then his cheek, and finally a light chaste one on his lips. She hoped, in the quiet of Nott’s dorm, that tomorrow he wouldn’t regret what he had said and done under the influence of the whiskey.


	22. Morning Tea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Early the next morning Hermione awoke to Theodore’s soft whispers from next to her in the bed. It was early enough that the room was still bathed in darkness so her eyes searched out his form while she tried to adjust to the inky blackness surrounding her. “ _ Expecto Patronum _ ,” Just as her eyes began to make out his face laying next to hers she saw white wisps of light as the spell formed around him. Shooting from his wand was the full form of his Patronus, and judging from the accomplished look on his face, this was the first time he had been able to cast it. Happiness spread through her as she was filled with pride watching him cast this spell. She smiled slightly and bit her lip, a warm feeling washed over her in waves and caused her chest to constrict in elation. She watched him intently as he blinked several times at the magic waiting for it to take shape. 

As they watched in anticipation a spectral raven began to fly around the room before landing in front of him. It stared back at him for a moment, shaking its body and ruffling its feathers, before hopping towards him happily and tilting its head waiting for a command. Feeling like she was probably intruding on a private moment, Hermione closed her eyes and feigned sleep as the spell stuttered casting the room once again in darkness. She felt the bed tilt and dip under Theo’s weight as he adjusted himself next to her before dropping a feather like kiss to her temple. “Thank you, Hermione,” He whispered to her seemingly unconscious form before standing from the bed and leaving the room. 

She heard the shower start in the bathroom, and so she decided it would be a good moment to head back to her room. Once there, she sat on the bed and began thinking. It was ridiculous to imagine that she had anything to do with his new ability to cast the spell. Sure she had helped both Slytherins practice the wand movements, and had given them a couple of short lessons on  _ how _ to do it, but the way he had thanked her implied that she had done something  _ more. _ She stood from the bed and paced the room a couple of times before running fingers through her tangled hair. Deciding to shower later that day, she changed into some comfortable muggle clothes of joggers and an oversized jumper before heading to the small kitchenette where she began brewing tea. 

Theo had exited the bathroom after the first pot had stopped steeping, and accepted a cup with a small nod. Hermione couldn’t be sure, but she thought she might have seen a small blush make its way upon his cheeks when their hands touched. “About last night…” She began as she sat down on one of the plush armchairs, wrapped in the blanket he had given her after their first ‘study date’. She saw him stiffen slightly, and her heart tightened in her chest at the possibility that he did indeed regret it. 

“What about last night, Granger?” She saw his indifferent mask pull into place as he sat down on the loveseat next to her, clearly preparing himself for whatever she was going to say next. She fiddled a little with her cup, enjoying the warmth as it seeped through the porcelain and laid claim to her fingers. 

Deciding that the quicker they had this discussion the better, Hermione straightened her shoulders and looked him directly in the eye, “Did you kiss me because you wanted to...or because you were drunk.” He stared at her for a second. He pulled his bottom lip into his teeth before setting his cup down lightly on the coffee table in the middle of the sitting area. 

“I’ve wanted to for years…” He said slowly, his eyes dropping from hers as a sheepish expression passed over his face. 

“How long?”

“I’ve wanted to be your friend since first year. I have wanted to kiss you since third. I have wanted to do more, and be more to you since fifth.” He explained, as he kept his gaze down. She started to wiggle a little bit, feeling slightly uncomfortable under the weight of his confession. 

“I have one more question before we start talking about where last night is going to lead us.” He nodded as if he expected her questions, leaning forward and placing his forearms on his knees, his tea abandoned and getting cold as it rested on the wood surface. 

“How...How did you know about the time turner?” She asked, watching his expression change from steady impassivity to amused as his eyes looked up at her. This clearly was not the question he had been expecting. 

His lips lifted into a small smirk before he rolled his eyes and started talking, “You weren’t that clever.” He laughed at her offended expression before he held out a hand to prevent her from arguing, “It’s fine, no one but me noticed. Um...Malfoy was bitching one day about you storming out of Divination, which got me thinking that it was odd because I couldn’t take Divination. You see, I had decided that my brain was put to better use in Ancient Runes, which you were also in. I started keeping a closer eye on you then I already was, which for the record made me feel like an outright stalker.” He chided accusingly as he gave her a pointed look. His eyes shined in amusement as he playfully blamed her for his attentive behavior.

“It was the day that you slapped the blond idiot that it finally made sense. You didn't see me behind the passageway you guys had just come through, I was reading an Arithmancy text trying to catch up to you in the course. Once he had run off with Crabbe and Goyle, the three of you went down to Hagrid's hut.” He smiled his crooked smile as he leaned forward and lowered his voice as if telling a secret, “Imagine my surprise when not five minutes later you and Potter came out of the same passageway, and followed yourself down the same pathway.” He watched as Hermione found her tea cup extremely interesting, her cheeks flaring pink. He leaned back on the loveseat, his smile growing. When he spoke again his voice was back to its normal volume, “It was that day I put two and two together. I was so bloody furious that you got to take extra courses when I was stuck choosing between them.”

“Well, if it makes you feel any better Divination was a waste of time.” She reassured, as she took another sip of her tea her lips forming into a wry smile. 

“So I’ve heard,” His voice was amused as his eyes drifted down to her blanket. “So, where is last night going to take us?”

“I was rather hoping we could-” Her sentence was cut off as there was a knock on the portrait. 

“Hold that thought,” Theo sighed, standing and stretching before he crossed the room and answered the door. She heard Draco and Theo greet each other in the entrance passageway, and finished her tea before going back to the kitchenette and pulling another mug down for the new guest. 

“Tea, Malfoy?” 

“Yes, thank you Granger.” He huffed lightly, giving her a sad looking smile, “Anyway, mother told me she will be heading to France to visit friends this holiday since she didn't get to last year with everything that happened. So, that means I will be spending my Yule time here at the castle.” He finished telling Theodore as he slumped onto the chair across from Hermione’s. He sounded put-out as he waved his wand before him sending the occasional shower of sparks across the room. 

“Sugar? Cream?” 

“Two teaspoons of sugar, please and thank you.” He called. 

“Don’t worry about it, mate. It’s not like you will be alone, I’ll be here. We can celebrate our idiotic families together.” Theo placated while giving his shoulder a firm pat and sitting down back in his spot on the loveseat. “We will have a nice Friendsmas!” 

”Mind if I join you?” Hermione asked as she gave Malfoy his tea before wrapping herself in her blanket. 

“Nice colors Granger, they suit you.” Malfoy smirked as he noticed her green and silver blanket. “I thought you usually celebrated with the Weasley brood.” 

“I do, but with Ron being so...well Ron, and with this being the first holiday without Fred I don't really want to intrude.” She said, ignoring his comment about her blanket as she wrapped it tighter around herself. “They deserve to have a holiday together without Ron’s attitude towards me mucking it up.” She dropped her gaze as she used the cotton to guard her heart from the dark feelings she received every time she remembered Fred being gone. She stared down at the empty fireplace as a familiar smirk danced its way across her memories. A smirk that she would only ever get to see on the face of his brother, which truth be told wasn’t the same. She felt her eyes water slightly and was brought out of the darkness by a familiar deep voice. 

“Fred was a good bloke. They found me, the twins I mean, lost on the third floor our first year. I was so scared because we weren’t supposed to be up there, and I was sure they were going to prank me or hurt me for being a Slytherin. They told me not to worry about it, and led me back to the dungeons.” Theo remembered, as he stared at his forgotten tea mug on the table. He cast a quick warming charm on it and gave it a sip. 

“I had a crush on Fred.” Hermione admitted suddenly. She blinked a couple of times, slightly shocked at herself because it was something she had only admitted to one other person...and that person was dead. “Fifth year when we were in Dumbledore's Army. He had been betting on me winning a duel against Ron, and thought I didn’t hear him. I did.” She smiled sadly, “It was a stupid school girl thing and was over by the end of sixth year.” She added shaking her head to clear it of the bitter sweet memories that had been dragged up. “Anyway you didn't answer my question.”

“Of course you can join us Granger. You are our friend right?” Malfoy smirked over the top of his mug as Theo lit the fire place noticing her pull her blanket even tighter around her. 

“Yeah...I am.” She smiled up at him, “I really didn’t take you for a lover of Christmas.” She said as she rose from her chair to get another cup of tea.

“Really? Well, it is my favorite holiday, mother used to always make time for me on Christmas. We would decorate the Manor together, and she would make time to play a couple games of Wizard’s Chess with me.” He seemed lost in memory as he spoke occasionally sipping his tea, “She would also bake me a pie every year, without the house elves help.” 

“What about you, Theo? How did you spend your Christmas’?” Hermione asked, ignoring the raised eyebrow she got from Malfoy as she called Theodore by his first name. 

“I usually spent my holidays in the castle,” His eyes were back to the blank expression he wore when he was Occluding. Before she could say anything further Malfoy’s voice sounded on the other side of the room. 

“Bring me more tea, Granger.” She rolled her eyes as she crossed the room bringing the tea pot with her as they settled down in front of the fire for the rest of the morning. 

* * *

Later that day, after the Hogwarts Express had departed taking the Gryffindors with it, Hermione was scrambling through a snow ridden Hogsmead trying to find the perfect gifts for two stupidly rich boys. How was she supposed to find something for them? What did you get two men who could buy whatever they wanted? Walking through the quidditch shop she cringed as she passed by signed portraits of professional players, her heart clenching a little when a familiar Bulgarian picture winked at her. She watched as the picture repeated the process on an endless loop before turning around and pacing around the store once more. 

Twenty galleons. That’s how much money she could spare on these boys. She had already purchased presents for Ginny, Harry, and Ron back in November, before the blow up in the Great Hall. She had given these presents to the Hogwarts elves to deliver on Christmas and felt weird taking them back (even if Ron didn’t really deserve a gift from her). 

Theo and Draco were currently back at the castle, having decided to spend the day with Blaise who had been feeling left out recently. Theo had promised to make time to talk more with Hermione regarding last night later, before he had ducked through the portrait with Draco. She had agreed as well, accepting the granted time without the two of them to purchase presents. It hadn’t even crossed her mind that they might be the kind to exchange Christmas presents until Draco had cockily mentioned that she was going to just ‘love’ what he had gotten her. This left Hermione scrambling to find something a week before Christmas when most stores were almost sold out of stock. She released a low grunt in annoyance as she stormed out of the store. It’s not like she would know what to purchase from this shop anyway! 

She needed to buy a new ink jar for her refillable quill. The quill was wonderful but would only work with good quality ink, and if you used cheaper ink it would cause the quill to gum up. She walked through the snow, lifting her feet higher than normal so she wouldn't trip, before crossing the street and heading into Scrivenshaft's Quill Shop . She looked around and found a rather pretty deep purple ink and a traditional black one. The wizard at the counter eyed her behind thick glasses, his crooked nose occasionally released a low sniffle as dust flew up from the old tome he was reading. 

She crossed to the counter giving the wizard a smile, as she placed her inks on the counter for purchase. The wizard gave her a grin back revealing several missing teeth as he marked her purchases down in his ledger. While waiting for him to finish, she noticed a few leather bound journals beneath a glass display case. They were well made, with even stitching across the spine and a deep cream parchment on the inside. Pursing her lips and narrowing her eyes in thought she turned to the wizard, “Are these for purchase?” 

“Of course, my dear.” His shaky voice replied as he slid off of his stool and walked slightly hunched over to the display case. He grabbed a brass key from a cord around his neck, and placed it on the case. Hermione watched in fascination as the key hopped over to the case and entered the lock before turning itself. The glass disappeared, and allowed the wizard to reach in and remove the stack of journals. “They are made by Regina Clawfoot, the legendary magic infuser herself. The pages take well to magic allowing the user to infuse the pages with animated paintings and drawings. A perfect gift for someone in need of a dream journal, an architect's sketch notebook, or even a writer’s idea book.” He handed her one so she could look it over. The journal was warm and she could feel the magic pulsating a little beneath the leather. 

“Do you suppose they would take well to a Protean Charm?” She asked, as she eyed the pages, her brown eyes narrowing even more as a plan slowly began to take form in her head.

“I suppose, if one could produce that sort of magic. It is beyond my capability though.” He coughed slightly, as he moved back to sit behind the register. 

“How much are you asking for them?” 

“Each journal is 15 galleons.” He tapped his wand on her ink, wrapping it up nicely and placing it in a bag. 

“Wait!” She cried reaching out, “I have changed my mind on my purchase today. I would like to purchase two of these notebooks instead of the ink, please.” She looked sadly at the ink as it was taken out of its bag and banished to its original counter. She would have to use money she had been saving for a new novel and the new ink, but she thought it was worth it. Once she had purchased the journals she hurried back to the castle.

First, she took each notebook and cast a small but powerful heat charm on their covers. Thinking of a picture in her head she scorched the surface of one of them with the silhouetted head of a raven surrounded with feathers. The other with the silhouetted head of a snow leopard surrounded by matching paw prints. She then connected the two journals using a variation of the Protean Charm. Finally, on the first page of the journal sporting the raven she wrote a small missive:

_These notebooks will help you two stay connected no matter the distance. They are charmed, of course, so all you need to do is write in one, and it will appear in the other. I hope this keeps you two from getting lonely every time we banish Draco back to the dungeons or Theo hides away in the Forest._

_With all my love,_

_Hermione J. Granger_

She waited until she felt the other journal heat up, and then opened it to the first page. She watched as the message appeared on the first page of the second journal in her handwriting. The heat slowly dissipated as she read the message. Happy with her handiwork she wrapped them carefully in red and gold paper, signing her name to each gift with a flourish. Summoning a house elf she told them where each gift was to be sent before smiling to herself. This was going to be a fun Christmas indeed. 


	23. Manipulation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Draco had spent most of the holiday with the two Heads of House as they hung out in the common room. On the first night Hermione suggested he stay on the loveseat for the night. He borrowed some of Theo’s sleep pants and the next morning transferred clothes into Theo’s room for the remainder of the break. Hermione tried to find time to discuss what happened between her and Theodore but it seemed that every time they had a moment together something would come up. Most recently she had been trying to corner him in the common room when a familiar cat-like Patronus had appeared. McGonagall’s voice echoed through the room as the Patronus opened its mouth and spoke, “Hermione, one of the prefects who was staying this holiday has come down with Pixi-pox. You will be in charge of their rounds this evening. Happy Christmas!” 

Giving Theo a small smile Hermione had pulled on her robes and left the common room. She was currently wandering the endless labyrinth of the dungeons and was starting to make her way up to the main floor. The musty air of the dungeons clung to her nose, causing it to crinkle when she passed by a particularly moldy spot. She passed by the Slytherin common room entrance and continued up the stairs, impressed by the silence of the castle. As she was about to round the final corner, she heard a scuffling and some deep mutterings that did not seem pleasant. 

Taking out her wand and peeking around the corner Hermione spotted David Travers. He was the same boy who shared her study course with her. The Slytherin who always made her laugh. His sandy blond hair was stained red with blood, and his face was bruised. He was pinned against the wall by two figures. One was a hulking brute who had his forearm pressed against David’s throat, the other was slim and lithe with her wand pointed directly into David’s cheek. Goyle and Pansy. Hermione rounded the corner, she thought she might have seen David give her a warning shake of his head, but she ignored him and cleared her throat audibly. 

“Pretty sure that would be 25 points each from Slytherin for being out after curfew, and 10 points each for conduct unbecoming of Hogwarts students. Except of course from Mr. Travers here.” She said, raising her wand slightly as Goyle lowered David to the ground, and Pansy turned to face her. 

“Whatever, Mudblood.” Pansy sneered, “This doesn’t concern you. This is a house matter.” 

“Seeing as how you are out in the halls after curfew it does concern me Parkinson. Leave Mr. Travers alone or I will speak to Professor McGonagall and see that you both have detention from now until our N.E.W.T.’s.” Hermione said, her heart was pounding with adrenaline as she watched Goyle pull his wand slowly out of his back pocket. 

“Oh, that’s cute. The half-blood cunt has a mudblood girlfriend.” Pansy raised her wand slightly twirling it between her fingers. She moved down the hall towards Hermione who raised her chin in defiance and stood tall. Parkinson stopped right between Goyle and Hermione at about the half-way point. 

Goyle grabbed Travers and spun around so he was holding him against his chest, his dark wooden wand pointed directly under David’s chin, as his other arm was wrapped around his neck. Goyle laughed a little before a look of disgust crossed his face, “She is ugly and her blood is filthy.” Even at this distance the smell of him filled the hallway. He smelled of alcohol and muggle cigarettes, Hermione smirked a little at the irony of someone so anti-muggle being addicted to one of their products, “Why Malfoy and Nott feel the need to protect her I will never know.” Hermione raised her chin higher and she squared her shoulders refusing to back down from him. She had opened her mouth to reply with a snarky comment when Pansy began to speak. 

“Oh you didn't hear?” Pansy asked, glancing over her shoulder to look at Goyle quickly before training her eyes back on Hermione, a smirk placed on her pug-like face. “He and Theo have been using her. They know that if they get Potter and this filth on their side they will be able to clear their name from the war. How else would a Malfoy or a Nott be welcomed back into society. It's quite brilliant, and  _ very _ Slytherin of them.” Pansy gave a low cruel laugh. A smile dawned on the bigger Slytherins face as realization sank in. Hermione stared at them for a second in confusion. 

“You’re lying,” Hermione rolled her eyes, but her hand clenched her wand slightly tighter. Her biggest fear was being spoken out loud to her after months of trying to conquer it. Her heart sped up just a bit, but she kept her mind trained on the task at hand. David needed help, and she would fucking help him. 

“Am I?” Parkinson gave a playful pout before continuing, “I know you are smarter than to actually think a couple of pure-bloods would willingly spend time with you for  _ pleasure _ . Did they tell you some sob story about how mistreated they were? How they wanted to change but daddy wouldn't let them? Please, it was all part of their plan.” Pansy rolled her eyes as if she was shocked at Hermione’s naivete. Hermione’s mind was reaching for straws at this point. There was no way they were tricking her! She was Hermione Granger, she was smarter than this. But... they were the second and third smartest in her year. If anyone could manipulate her it was them. No! She wouldn’t believe it. 

“Nott...he wouldn’t. He beat you up...he…noticed me.” She stammered, though she wasn’t really talking to them, she was thinking out loud. Goyle gave her a scowl and started forward, but one look from Pansy had him remaining where he stood. He did jam his wand deeper into Travers throat making him give out a strangled cry. 

“Oh please.” Pansy scoffed, folding her arms and cocking a hip out to one side, “He watched you because you were Harry Potter’s mudblood best friend. I wouldn’t be surprised if his father had him keep an eye on you since first year. Did you really think he cared? As for beating up dear Goyle here...certainly got you to trust him didn't it.” Pansy explained slowly as she leaned in closer towards Hermione and stage whispered, “Really I am just here ruining their hard work, but I'm sick of Draco ruining his name by souring himself with you.”

“Leave her alone, Parkinson you bitch.” As Travers finished his sentence hell began to break loose in the abandoned corridors. Pansy turned on her heel, wand raised to face Travers. Hermione could hear the start of a curse escaping Pansy’s lips, and acting on instinct she raised her own wand and cast a quick silent Protego. The silver shield erupted between Pansy and Travers just before the bright blue curse would have hit him. Hermione’s protection spell crackled, but held strong as she cast a quick stunning charm. The stun hit Goyle in the forehead, her charm passing easily through her own shield. He fell back away from Travers, but unfortunately David was unable to keep his balance and fell with him. 

As Hermione was distracted by David falling, Pansy turned around and shot out a simple slicing hex. The Gryffindor heard the tail-end of the spell and dropped at the last second, she felt the spell slice her forehead barely skimming the skin, but could feel the beginnings of blood as it trickled down her forehead and into her eye. 

Hermione raised her wand and sent another Stupefy that Pansy blocked. They kept shooting spells back and forth towards one another until Hermione got the upper hand. Pansy may have had dark magic she wasn’t scared to use, but Hermione had skill and experience, and over the past few weeks she had slowly been getting better at responding to situations. She was finally becoming herself again, and here in the corridors she felt strong and powerful with no fear of a breakdown. Finally, Parkinson was in a corner, and with a quick disarming charm Hermione had the pug-faced girl's wand in her hand and was staring at her with dark eyes. 

David came up to stand next to Hermione as she hissed,“I suggest you go back to your common room before I lose my temper Parkinson.”

“Of course. Wouldn’t want to end up like poor Traver’s dear mudblood mother,” Pansy’s last taunt was met with a well aimed stun from David, who now held Goyle’s lost wand. Once her body fell to the floor Hermione took a step back and collapsed against the wall trying absorb the new information that whirled around in her mind. 

“You alright?” David asked her, leaning his lanky body down to look her in the eyes. He ran a quick hand over her forehead to make sure the cut wasn’t too deep. 

“Yeah I'm alright, thank you.” She sighed as she finally caught her breath from the impromptu duel and the way her mind was processing everything. “What are you doing out past curfew?”

He gave her a small smile before his face turned red, “I was just making sure a friendly Hufflepuff made it back to her common room,” Hermione's face turned bright red with acknowledgment, “Why don’t I escort you back to your common room too?” David prompted while stepping over Goyles supine form. 

“I still have rounds to do,” Hermione shook her head before standing on shaky legs. He leaned down to Goyles form and dug through his robe pockets before pulling out an alder wood wand. He smiled down at it before turning his attention back to Hermione and discarding Goyle’s on the floor next to the thugs unconscious form. 

“I don’t care.” David declared as he offered his arm. Feeling like for once she deserved to skive off her duties, Hermione grabbed hold of his arm for support as they started walking up the stairs.”Hey Hermione, quick favor,” David looked down at her as he walked up the stairs towards the main floor, Hermione nodded for him to continue, “Don’t tell anyone about what happened down there. Ok? It won't help anything other than making me a bigger target than I already am.” She opened her mouth to argue, but at his severe look she just nodded and clung to his arm a little tighter for reassurance. After they made it to the third floor in silence Hermione looked up at David and let her curiosity burn until she couldn't take it anymore. 

“What happened to your mother?” She blurted in a rush. 

“She died,” David said in a low voice, making sure they didn't trip on the trick stair. 

“I’m sorry,” Hermione said, squeezing his arm where she was holding it. 

“She fought. She was so brave and kind. Loyal too. She was a Hufflepuff, and was so proud to be one. Used to tell me all the time it was the best house,” He rolled his eyes as a small smile came on his lips, “Dad met her on the pitch. She was the only Chaser that could out score him. When he told his mum he was in love with her….he was forced out of the family, but father didn’t care and married her right out of Hogwarts.” Hermione’s mind drifted to Sirius Black. Harry’s godfather had also been forced out of his family due to his beliefs. It made her heart hurt when thinking about how unforgiving the pure-blood families could be. 

David had gotten quiet again. His dirty blond hair was hanging in his face as he watched their feet. “She had gone out to get groceries right before Easter. She said we needed a ham and asked if I wanted to go with her. I was so caught up in writing a letter to a bloody girl I said I wanted to stay home. Death Eaters killed her right next to the apparition point. She was on her way home.” A couple of tears escaped his eyes as they made it to the seventh floor. “I should have been there with her. I could have helped her.” 

“David, I believe you were right where you needed to be.” He looked up at her, the guilt of his mother's death clear in his eyes. “If you would have gone, you would be dead. Who would help younger Slytherins when they are being bullied for being half-bloods?” She had often heard of David sticking up for those of ‘lesser’ blood status down in the Slytherin dungeons, something that she was extremely proud of and had told him as much during their study sessions. “Who would make me laugh when I feel like I'm going to die while studying Potions?” He gave her a small sad smile. 

“You think so, Hermione?” 

“Yeah, I do.” They were at the portrait now, and David was standing there waiting for her to go in. She gave him a tight hug running her hands down his back for comfort. Just before she went in she raised her wand and cast several healing spells on his head and face. Once she was sure he would be ok she nodded, and said a quick thank you before sending him on his way back to the dungeons with warnings of ‘be safe’ spoken between them. She watched him walk away as Pansy’s words assaulted her mind. She felt a few tears fall down her face from fear before she turned and entered the common room praying that Nott and Malfoy were already asleep. 

Those prayers were not to be answered as Hermione entered and saw Theo sitting on the couch with Draco playing a game of Wizard’s Chess that Draco had brought up from his dorm. They each gave her smiles as she entered the room, but those smiles quickly fell as she came into the light. Theo was up before Draco, reaching for her and wiping stray tears that had started to fall down her face, before tilting her chin and looking at her head. She pulled away, Pansy’s words still ringing in her ears and planting seeds of doubt about the boys intentions. She felt bad about it, but didn’t want to open herself up anymore than she already had. 

“Wha-”

“I am fine.” Her words were clipped and had barely any emotion. 

“Clearly you are not-” Theo said, motioning to her head which was still dripping blood. 

“Don’t worry about it...besides didn't you say you were bad at healing spells?” She snapped as she jerked away from him again. 

“I kind of lied…” He huffed, as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his head before looking at her, “I am actually quite good at healing spells.”

“Don't worry, it's not life threatening,” She sneered as she began to register his words. He lied to her? If he could lie about something as simple as his ability to do simple spells, what would stop him from lying to her about more important things? Did he lie to her? How would she ever be able to tell when he could block all his emotions? Draco was a rather accomplished Occlumens too. Did Draco lie to her? How could she ever trust either of them ever again? Before she could stop herself the words began to spew forth like a geyser, similar to the way she had yelled at Professor Flitwick. “Do you honestly think being my friend is going to wipe your reputation clean?” Her voice was shaking as she turned to face away from both boys. 

Theo looked confused and taken aback by her words but she couldn’t help herself. She was cold, tired and hurt, and everything Pansy had said had started to make sense in her addled brain. Why else would someone like Theodore Nott find her even remotely attractive? Maybe Ron had been right about the way the Slytherins were manipulating her. 

“What are you on about, Granger?” Malfoy asked as he came around the chair. 

“Do all the Slytherins know what you’re up to, or did you just tell Pansy so she would be waiting for you at the end of the year after you sullied your perfect pure-blood reputation by being friends with me?” She asked. Venom was coursing through her words as grey eyes became hard in front of her. “Don’t worry she made it perfectly clear what you two have been doing this whole time. Sorry to disappoint you, but you won't get the chance to  _ use me _ for my name.” She started towards her dorm room and was almost there when Nott stepped in front of her blocking her path.

“Hermione...please, what are you talking about,” Theo asked, his blue eyes a shade of brilliant cerulean as he fought back confusion and hurt. 

“No. Not Hermione. Not to you. I am Granger and you...you are  _ Lord  _ Nott.” She said, putting emphasis on the title he had gained from his father and pushing past him. “You were just one more person whose problems they wanted me to solve,” She scoffed and rolled her eyes remembering when he promised he would never ask her to do just that, “Fuck off both of you.” Both boys' eyes widened as they heard the Gryffindor Princess curse for the first time. She then stormed into her room and slammed the door. That night she cried herself to sleep while holding Theodore’s blanket. Over the months Nott had created a pavlovian effect where she still relied on his scent for comfort, and if she couldn’t be with him, his blanket was the next best thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I hope you enjoyed this weeks Bonus Chapter!


	24. Confirming Fears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

The rest of the holiday was spent with Hermione desperately avoiding her roommate. It had gotten to the point that Hermione refused to leave her room even to eat. On several occasions she had almost convinced herself to find Nott and Malfoy and apologize. To ask them to explain. Everytime she got to the door she paused and lowered her head to rest on the wood. Before she could even grab the door knob she was always assaulted with the same memories. A blond boy smirking while spitting out that horrid word. Mudblood. Had he really changed? Was he really willing to throw away sixteen years of prejudice? Furthermore, what proof did she have that he was? It made the most logical sense that he was using her...that they both were. Four months did not make up for six years of torment. 

As for Nott...the boy who never said a single bad thing to her...he never said anything good either. It would make sense he had been playing his cards right. Holding them close to his chest, until the war ended. Who knew what side he had really been on? She didn’t. She wanted to believe they had changed, that Pansy Parkinson was a liar. But that lingering question always surfaced before she could find them and ask them their side...what if Pansy was right? Was she really willing to risk her heart to bet on him? On them? She wasn’t sure. She knew that she was getting bad again when she realized that it had been a couple days since she had showered. Waiting until it was half two in the morning she grabbed her towel and clothes and tried to sneak into the common room.

She noticed that Nott was sleeping on the couch as if he had been waiting for her to come out, and she couldn't help her heart breaking slightly at the tired look he wore even in sleep. She was thankful all they had done was kiss the other night, and tried not to think about how hurt she would have been if she had let Nott convince her to do much more. Trying not to let it get to her she crept across the floor to the bathroom before casting several silencing charms on the room and locking it up tight with a couple locking charms. 

After she had a quick shower, she dressed and crept across the floor again. She noticed that in the firelight dancing across the room he was using her Gryffindor blanket, and felt a twinge of guilt for having given it to him. She didn’t want to take it away from him, because it did look like it helped him sleep and she wasn’t heartless. She, on the other hand, wanted to purge thoughts that led her back to Nott and the last four months they had shared as friends. So, she went back to her room and took one more strong sniff of his blanket, she folded it and laid it gently as if it were made of glass on the table next to him. 

She then raided the pantry for a few crisps, creeping back into her room before eating them and crawling back into her bed. The sheets felt significantly more lonely without the aid of his scent allowing her to drift to sleep. 

* * *

Once everyone returned from Christmas break Hermione made sure to always have Harry or Ginny walk her to class or to get food. Neither asked what had happened over break, but they weren’t thick enough not to notice the way Hermione would keep her head down during class, or that she had once again retreated to the table in the back of potions so she could be alone. More than once Ginny had tried to start up game night again, but Hermione was stiffly against that, at least for now. She promised they could begin game nights again at the end of February. 

Hermione ignored the shooting glances that Malfoy and Nott would send her way as she sat down away from them in Arithmancy and Ancient Runes. After Arithmancy she would practically sprint away from the class so Nott wouldn’t catch her alone, and a couple of times she had to actually hide in empty classrooms so he wouldn't find her. Nights in the common room were the worst. Every night without fail he would come to her door and ask if she would be joining them in Rowena’s Study. She wouldn’t ever answer and he would always end his question with a dejected, “we miss you,” which would always cause another crack to puncture her heart. 

It wasn’t until February that she had to finally admit why she was so upset with what had happened. It wasn’t like this had been the first time she had been manipulated by the Slytherins so she was unsure as to why it was causing her to break down so often. She had spent more times trying to catch her breath in the past month than she had her entire life. It was during Charms one bright and sunny Friday that realization crashed through the walls she had built to try and protect herself. 

“Ok students. I know we stopped working on the Patronus charm a couple of months back, but since we have all had such a wonderful last few months I would like to go through each of you and see if we can’t give it one more attempt before your N.E.W.T.’s. Line up,” The students did so, and she watched as most of the students were able to conjure at least incorporeal Patronus’. 

Nott summoned his easily and was greeted with oohs and aahs from fellow students. It was Flitwick's reaction that really took the cake though, “A raven, how beautiful! You know, they say that Ravenclaw herself had a raven as a Patronus. I always thought you should have been in my house, you were always so clever-” Hermione rolled her eyes as the praise continued. Eventually, their short Professor came to stand in front of her and prompted her to make an attempt with a large smile that caused a mouth full of teeth to appear from the scruff of his long beard. 

Hermione searched her memories to find the right one, and nearly fell over when her happiest memory surfaced. It was the morning after the infamous kiss, watching Nott successfully cast his Patronus in the wee hours of the morning. When all the world slept except for him and her. In her mind's eye she watched the triumphant look that passed over his normally stoic features. When she remembered the breath ghosting over her hair as he said ‘thank you’ when he thought she was still asleep. She felt a warm glow fill her chest as tears pricked at the corners of her eyes. Tears of pride. The darkness that would have covered the memory with Pansy’s sneer and dark words couldn’t touch it. It didn't matter if he had lied to her to get her into his bed. She had enjoyed being there and loved witnessing the purity of his first success. There was nothing that could take away the feeling of watching someone she cared so deeply for succeed in something they wanted to do. 

Smiling to herself she whispered the incantation, and was so happy when the spell conjured a corporeal form that she didn't notice what it was until she heard a collective gasp. When she looked for her otter, she was shocked that her otter was nowhere to be seen and instead flying around Theodore Nott’s head was a raven. It was smaller than his, but she knew what this meant. It meant the same thing it did when Professor Snape had a Patronus that mirrored Lily Potter’s, and when Lily’s Patronus had partnered with James Potter’s. She dropped her wand arm, and the spell slowly sputtered, but not before trying to land on Nott’s shoulder. When Nott finally looked back at Hermione his face was a bright pink and his eyes were searching hers.

“I am sorry Professor,” Hermione whispered before walking as quickly as she could to the back of the room. In a rush she gathered up her bag and ink and quill (she had stopped using the self inking one since she had used her money on their gifts). She didn’t look back as the students started to whisper. She didn’t look back when Harry called her name, or when Ginny tried to tug her to a stop. She didn't look back because she couldn’t see the looks in their eyes...in his. 

“Granger?” Nott exclaimed from the back of the room. She ignored him and walked out the door. “Damnit Granger stop!” She couldn't love him! She couldn't, not after everything he had done to her.  _ But you do _ . A small voice echoed in her mind as her footsteps bounced off the corridors. Even if she did, it didn’t matter because he didn’t love her. So, she might as well bury that thought deep in the recesses of her mind. She could get over him...in time. And if she couldn’t then she did always have a thing for cats. She would just live alone in a flat with a hundred cats. The thing that mattered was that he had manipulated her and she couldn’t trust him, and if she couldn’t trust him then she couldn’t be with him. 

She could hear him trying to catch up to her so she decided to use some of her delinquent knowledge and rounded a corner she recognized. Taking one look around she ducked behind a familiar tapestry before entering a secret passage that the Weasley Twins had shown her fifth year. “Fuck!” She heard his frustration as she leaned against the wall that had closed behind her. 

“Theo, mate.” It was Harry, “What happened between you two?” He prompted stiffly. She could tell from the sound of his voice that he was trying to keep his anger in check. It had been a while since she had heard his ‘big brother’ tone, and it brought a sad small smile to her face. 

“I don't know...I-she...something happened with Pansy over the holidays. She came back to the room with a gash on her head and she had been crying. I offered to heal it and next thing I know she wouldn't let me near her.” Nott’s voice was rough with emotion. He was either a very good actor or couldn’t keep his walls up...Hermione was betting on the former. 

“I wasn’t really referring to her ignoring you this past month. Is it safe to assume you know what a matching Patronus means,” Harry demanded, it sounded like he had pulled Nott closer to the wall. Possibly to get him out of the way of the crowds which were starting to make an appearance if the clatter of noise was any indication. 

“Yeah, I already knew I loved her. Matching her Patronus just made it obvious to everyone fucking else,” Theo sighed out. A very good actor indeed, she thought to herself. She could imagine him running his hands down his face like he always did when he was frustrated. She held back tears as she thought of how she wanted to comfort him. But it was all a lie she reminded herself. 

“What? No you idiot. Hermione’s Patronus is-well  _ was  _ an otter. You didn’t match hers….she matched yours.” Harry stated as if talking to a small child. 

“She-She never told me what hers was. How was I supposed to know?” If possible Nott sounded even more frustrated. “No...that can’t be right...she doesn't. That doesn't make sense, why would she be avoiding me then?” Hermione assumed that Harry had shrugged, because Nott continued, “We have to find out what Pansy did. I can’t keep doing this.” He sounded so weak and broken that Hermione almost rushed out to hug him, but then she remembered who he was and  _ what  _ he was and buckled down, biting her lip and squeezing her fists to keep steady. They must have moved away from the secret passage, because Hermione didn’t hear anymore of the conversation. She waited several minutes in the dark in order to get better control of her breathing before following it up to where it let out near the Great Hall. She was about to go back towards the common room when Ginny rounded the corner. 

“Hermione! I’ve been looking everywhere for you.” The fiery redhead bounded up to Hermione with a smirk on her face, “They are serving shepherds pie at lunch today...your favorite!” She gushed, grabbing hold of Hermione’s arm as she tried to drag her around the corner. 

“That’s OK Ginny. I am just going to study in my dorm.” Hermione pulled her arm out from Ginny’s and began to walk back towards her common room. Ginny grabbed her again and started pulling her towards the Great Hall, looping her arm around Hermione’s and locking her arm around at the wrist.

“Hermione, we haven’t seen hide or hair from you in almost a month.” Ginny stated, locking her hazel eyes on her friend and looking at her seriously, “You have to come and eat. If mum saw you like this she would have a fit, you look thin as can be.” The redhead emphasized her point by poking the brunette in the side, “You can study later.” Hermione tried to pull her arm out of Ginny’s again, but Ginny had years of Chaser experience on her side and pulled her down into the Great Hall against Hermione's struggles. She couldn't help but glance at the Slytherin table and was greeted by a very smug looking Pansy who was snuggled up against Draco’s side. Draco was currently laughing at something Nott said, the blond’s arm firmly wrapped around Pansy’s waist, as Nott smiled and continued animatedly regaling his story

It all but confirmed Hermione’s fears. She hesitated for a moment while her chest constricted. She stood for a couple of seconds while Ginny waited patiently at her side, squeezing her arm in a reassuring way. Hermione took a couple of deep breaths before raising her head as high as she could bear. She was Hermione Granger, and she was done having her emotions manipulated by two slithering snakes. She walked over to the Gryffindor table and tucked herself in between Harry and Ginny. Leaning her head on her spectacled friend's shoulder hoping he wouldn't question it. Like the brother Hermione always thought he was, he wrapped his arm around her in a show of silent support. Harry lent down and gave her a small kiss to the top of her head before returning to the conversation surrounding him as she ate a few bites of food, and tried to smile at the right places. She could tell by the concerned glances Neville kept shooting her that her smile never reached her eyes. 

“Hermione,” Ginny urged from her side, “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Hermione sighed from as she leaned heavily on her brother, “I don't think it would matter anyway.” The redhead nodded, before scooping up another portion of shepherds pie and giving it to Hermione. 

“Mum always said there wasn’t a sadness that wasn’t overcome with good food.” Ginny smiled as she took a bite of her own mash. 

“I miss your mother, remind me never to skip Christmas with them again.” 

“Deal!” The redhead agreed easily as the conversation flowed around them. When they left the Great Hall Hermione walked with Harry to Herbology, thankful for the class without the Slytherins. She wasn’t sure if she could have taken another class with Nott now that Harry had spilled the beans on how she felt about him. Not that she really minded. It didn’t matter anyway. Because he didn’t love her. 


	25. Corridor Conversations and Greenhouse Relations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> I hope you enjoy a BONUS CHAPTER!
> 
> CHECK END OF CHAPTER FOR AUTHOR NOTE

“Hermione!” The deep voice called from the end of the hall as Hermione made her way to her Arithmancy course the next day, trying to get there at the last second to avoid any idle chatter. She turned to look behind her shoulder and saw David Tavers running to catch up to her. 

“Hi David. Are you alright?” She asked, concern filling her brown eyes as he slowed to a walk. His eye was blackened and he was currently clenching and unclenching his right hand which was red and bruised. She immediately pulled out her wand and snatched his hand before first casting a cooling charm and a small healing spell. 

“Well, I am now,” he chuckled with a grin. He began to loosen his green and silver tie as he thanked her for healing his hand, “I wanted to tell you I think Nott and Malfoy are bloody toe-rags.” He jutted out his chin, as he shoved his healed hand in his trouser pockets. 

“Oh...well thank you I think David.” She replied, standing awkwardly in the corridor as students slowly passed, “What happened though. Your eye looks awful, would you like me to heal it too?” 

“Nah, I’ll be alright. I’ve suffered worse from potion disasters.” His voice lowered as his face turned deadly serious. “I fucking hate potions.” Hermione let out a small laugh in agreement and pulled him closer to the wall as students began to get frustrated at them for holding up traffic. “I got into a slight argument with Burke.”

“ _Slight_ argument?” 

“Ok, so it was a big argument. No worries though I am completely fine.”

“Well, I am glad to hear you’re fine. What was it over?”

“Oh you know the usual... father is a blood traitor, mother’s a mudblood, and I am nothing but a half-blood scoundrel who doesn't deserve to be in Salazar's great house,” He mocked as he leaned his shoulder up against the wall. He gave her a half smile that made his green eyes light up and his face look younger than it already did. “Nothing I haven't heard before. Which is fine because I made it to Slytherin due to my unwavering ambition, and when I am Minister I will make sure to remember those who treated others so unfairly in school.” He shrugged. She laughed lightly at this and nodded at him. 

“You will make a great Minister. You are smart and kind and ridiculously funny. Not to mention you are very sneaky...the traits of all great politicians.” He gave her another smile and shook his head. “I am going to be honest though, I really thought fighting the war would have made a difference. That people would have changed.” She sighed a little as she played with the sleeve of her robe. 

“I think it did overall,” David nodded, his eyes shining, “The amount of bullying in the Slytherin common rooms has decreased dramatically. Unfortunately, there will always be people who believe differently. It is going to be a long process. It will probably take years to show everyone its ok to think differently. One of the reasons I want to be Minister!” He looked at her shaking his head, “Did you know there has _never_ been a Half-Blood Minister of Magic?” She nodded slowly. There had only ever been a pure-blooded Minister of Magic for Britain. He was right. There had always been prejudice. It didn’t stop after the last war, so why did she expect it to stop now? The only way to make a change, was to lead the charge. To prove that it was ok to be of a ‘lesser’ blood status. This was something she had already been striving to prove anyway. People like Pansy and Goyle were already so used to being able to judge and act how they wanted, the only way things were going to change is if they showed that the way they were acting was not ok! David's voice slowly pulled her out of her thoughts,“So, what are you going to do?”

“Oh, I am really not sure.” She waved her hand as if dismissing an annoying insect, “Probably become part of the Ministry. I’ll think about it more after taking my N.E.W.T.’s.” She leaned on the wall next to him, happy to have someone to talk to. “What did you mean about Nott and Malfoy.”

“It’s all over Slytherin. Malfoy and Nott came down to Slytherin to talk to Pansy a few nights ago, and they have been inseparable ever since. I really thought she was just trying to get under your skin.” He blew a long winded breath out and crossed his arms, “I wanted to believe that they had changed...but I guess not. The fact that they didn’t see how great they had it with you as a friend,” he gave her a friendly punch on the arm, causing her to rub the spot he hit playfully, “Well, that’s their loss.” They stood there for a couple of moments in silence before Hermione spoke again quietly. 

“David, we need to do something about the way Slytherin house members treat wizards and witches like you,” She motioned out to the hall as if the whole of Slytherin was standing there, “If we don't do something someone is going to get hurt...well seriously hurt,” She motioned to his face, “How else are we supposed to make a change in this school?” She reached up and poked his bruise causing him to flinch slightly, but he didn’t pull away. 

“I know, ok.” He sighed as she lowered her hand, “I just don't want to cause anymore waves until I am out of here. I could do so much more as Minister than as a kid here in school.”

“The only way change can start is if we act when we see something wrong,” She gazed up at him intently, her voice low and reassuring. “We have to show the younger generation that prejudice is no longer tolerated!” He nodded slowly before running a free hand up the back of his neck. 

“I will go speak with McGonagall after my next class.” Hermione gave him a brilliant smile before motioning towards his black eye. 

“I really should deduct points,” Hermione scolded. 

“You really should,” he laughed, keeping his voice light as he moved a little closer to her. He wasn't inappropriately close, but it was clear he was friendly with her if anyone was looking. Finally, after a few more minutes of idle conversation, Hermione gave him a small wave and they went to their separate classes. 

* * *

The next evening, Hermione had volunteered herself to harvest the Valerian Root needed for her potions project. The project had been extended to the end of the year due to the time it took to grow the variety of plants each student was using. It had been too late into the assignment for a partner switch, so she had told the Slytherins that she would be harvesting the root alone before sweeping out of the classroom. After getting a pass that would allow her to be out after curfew to harvest the Valerian Root she walked up to the dorm room in order to finish some homework before going down to the greenhouse. 

The dorm was currently empty, so she took advantage of the quiet and took a quick shower, and sat on the couch while eyeing the group of presents that had remained outside her door since Christmas. There were at least six packages, with four of them being wrapped in a lovely lavender color with silver and gold bows, and two of them wrapped in a deep rich green with silver ribbons on them. Underneath the stack was the blanket she had tried to return to Nott. She hadn’t needed to check the names to know they were from Malfoy and Nott, and so she had refused to open them. 

Hermione spent the next couple hours going over the process of harvesting to ensure the root would be properly gathered. Making sure her Dragon Hide gloves (because the root could burn your skin if not cared for perfectly) and her new silver pruners were in her bag, she glanced out the window and let out a small huff. Valerian Root could only be properly harvested on the first day of the waning crescent moon at exactly midnight. This was to ensure the root was at its full magical potential and allowed for the best specimens. 

Finally, feeling prepared she began to head down to the greenhouse at exactly quarter past eleven. The walk to the greenhouse was uneventful. She waved to Nearly Headless Nick, and ignored the angry portraits who were upset at having their beauty rest interrupted. Once she was outside the castle wall she relished in the feeling of the cool February air on her cheeks as she passed under the small light from the moon. Knowing she would need more light to see by she did a quick cast of a _lumos_ spell and allowed the small light to actually leave her wand, and float right next to her head. Eventually, she was standing inside the greenhouse with a small tempus spell projected on the wall as she waited until midnight. She harvested the root quickly and was cleaning up when she heard the door click shut, and lock behind someone. 

“Who's there?” She demanded, wand raised as she tried to get a better look at the newcomer. Her heart pounded in her ears as thoughts of the war began to infiltrate her mind. She kept a good hold on her emotions, and her wand hand steadied as her fight or flight response settled on fight. In answer to her spoken question a spectral Raven flew towards her and flapped its wings. 

“It’s just me, Granger.” She heard his low timber as the raven disappeared. Frustrated she closed her eyes before furrowing her brows and pushing the Valerian Root into the small mesh net bag she had brought for proper storage. Her heart had actually sped up at his voice but a new anxiety had replaced her fear. 

“What do you want, Nott?” She asked, trying to keep her tone relatively civil. She took a deep breath, turning her back towards the door as she busied herself cleaning up the supplies she had used. Professor Sprout would kill her if she left the greenhouse a mess. 

The tell tale sign of hissing announced the newcomer had just walked past the Venomous Tentacula and was only a couple of steps behind her. “I want you to look at me,” He whispered. His voice was low again, broken as he stood there. She could feel the small puffs of his breath on the back of her head as he stood behind her. “C’mon Gryffindor. Use that fucking bravery you are famous for and look at me!” He ordered a little louder in challenge. She slammed her pruners into her bag and, against her better judgment and the warning in her head, turned around. 

She looked at his chest, keeping her eyes low so she was not tempted. She was doing well. In the small enclosed space of the greenhouse the scent of spearmint and parchment was intoxicating. Without meaning too she took one deep inhale through her nose, and released a shaky breath. He reached towards her, and when she didn't flinch he put his hand below her chin and forced her to meet his gaze. His eyes were cerulean and were glossy with some emotion she couldn’t bear to name.

“Is it true?” Nott inquired. He didn't need to tell her what he was asking. It was simple and really she was surprised she had made it this many days without him cornering her and forcing her to talk to him before now. It didn't make it any easier, and staring into his eyes was almost all she could take as the pressure behind her own started to build. 

“Why do you care? It doesn’t matter…” She forced out as tears started to flow down her cheeks. She hated that she was crying in front of him. She hated that he held so much power over her and that she knew she would never recover from what she felt. She hated so much that he had the audacity to stand there in front of her in the middle of the night and make her believe that maybe he cared. She fucking hated him...but at the same time she didnt. 

“I think it does. Just please answer the question.” He took another step towards her. He was standing close now, barely a finger's breadth away. If she took a deep breath their chests would touch. She had to tilt her head so she could maintain eye contact. She should have looked away, but his eyes were so hypnotizing that she couldn’t, and she was scared if she looked away she might never get to see them again. 

“Yes...I do.” She whispered. His eyes flicked to her lips when she spoke and she watched as his Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed before clearing his throat and speaking again. His voice was still quiet, almost weak.

“You do what?” One hand still on her chin the other had reached down to rest on her hip. She savored the heat that spread through her t-shirt where his hand touched her. The greenhouse was so humid and hot that it had caused her to take her cloak off before she had started the harvest, and now there was nothing separating his large hand from her skin other than the thin cotton material.

She could have shoved him off of her and she could have stormed away. She could have left the greenhouse the second his scent entered her nose. She could have marched back into the castle and allowed herself to wallow in self pity and longing. She could have hexed him. She could have yelled at him. There were a million things she _could_ have done in that moment, but instead she reached down and put one hand on the forearm near her waist, and reached the other to rest on his cheek. 

He leaned into the feeling, his facial hair prickling her skin from lacking a proper shave for a least a couple days. His eyes were half lidded as he waited patiently for her answer. “I do love you.” He released a shuddering breath and moved the hand from her chin to the back of her neck. He leaned down slowly, hesitantly, and she thought to herself that one more kiss was all she needed. She could let him kiss her _one last time,_ then she could forget about him. She would finish her N.E.W.T.’s, and move to the United States and stay in Alaska where it was winter almost all the time. Where she would only have to remember him in her dreams, in which he had already taken permanent residence. 

His lips were so soft as he kissed her, slow moving as he pulled her closer to him. She put her hand in his hair, willing herself to remember the feeling of the soft strands flowing through her fingers as she scratched his scalp causing him to release a low deep moan. His fingers dug gently into the skin of her hips as he pulled her tighter. She opened her mouth to his wandering tongue and eagerly tasted him. _One last time_. She thought as she moved her other hand up his arm to his shoulder and pulled him closer to make him bend lower and deepen the kiss. In one swift movement he picked her up and pushed her up against the workbench so she was seated and they were near eye level. 

_One last time_ . She thought as she opened her thighs and let him step closer. As he worked his hand in her hair and swallowed her moans. _One last time_ . As she ran her hand over the plains of his chest, and as his hand worked its way up her shirt, making her stomach and chest erupt in goose bumps. She matched him in fervor as the kiss heated and when he started to nibble on her lower lip she thought that maybe they could just live in the greenhouse and forget everything that made her doubt him. But, she couldn’t do that. So, instead, she started to slowly push him away. _That was the last time_ , she thought as she tried to steady her racing heart and her shallow breath. As she met his eyes she saw the tears mirroring her own as if he knew what she was thinking. 

He didn't say anything as she pushed him away. He remained quiet as she adjusted her shirt and flattened her hair, where his fingers had caused it to flair out. He stared silently as she gathered the bag of Valerian Root and flung it over her shoulder, and picked up her wand from the floor. He finally spoke when she made it to the door.

“How could you trust Pansy over us?”

"You seem to be pretty chummy with her the other day!"

"I was trying to see what she had fucking said to you, Granger. Answer the question!" 

“I don’t _trust_ her,” Hermione whispered, her hand hesitating over the door knob. She thought back to the way Krum had told her he just wanted to be friends right when she started to have feelings for him, and the way Ron had chosen Lavender over her and Harry sixth year, “It just doesn't make sense to me that you have ever wanted me.” She sighed, “You are,” She turned to face him, “amazing Nott. You could have any girl in Hogwarts, but you chose the bushy haired know-it-all with big teeth?” She rubbed her tongue along her slightly oversized front teeth, she had grown into them more the past few years but they still stood out slightly when she smiled, “It’s not logical. I want to trust you. With every fiber of my soul I want to. But the doubt about your intentions...it will always be there.” She turned back to face the door again, prepared to leave him there. 

“Wait! I-I think I know how you can trust me.” He stuttered, clearly unsure of himself. She had never heard him with this much raw emotion in his voice except the night of their first kiss. When he had claimed to notice her when no one else had. She hesitated at the door and turned back to him. 

He looked around the room frantically before running back to the supply closet in the back of the greenhouse and grabbing a vial. His eyes were forget-me-not as he walked quickly towards her, but by the time he reached her they were cerulean again as tears began falling down his face. He closed his eyes for a second, and she watched as magic flowed through his tears causing small white wisps to float within the salty prison. He lifted the vial to his eye and let the memories flow into it. He corked the vial and stared at it for several minutes before slowly offering it to her.

“Are you sure?” She asked, knowing how important memories were to an occlumens. For him to offer this to her was essentially giving her access to his mind, which he had trained hard to protect. 

“I...I don't know any other way. I have to- You have to see.” He pleaded wiping the tears from his face before raising the walls in his mind. Closing it up tight so the emotion was no longer there. “Take them to the pensieve in McGonagall's office... _please_.” He begged before grabbing his cloak. He reached out to her again but thought better of it and slowly let his arm fall back to his side. He gave her a small crooked smile that caused a dimple to form on his left cheek, a smile that never reached his eyes, before walking out of the greenhouse. Leaving her behind with a frantically beating heart, and memories that he would never allow anyone else to see. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has come to my attention that some people disagree with Hermione's reactions to the Slytherins. I would like to explain that while I believe Hermione is a strong character she does have flaws. When Ron began dating Lavender Hermione had stopped talking to him for months due to her feelings of betrayal. This being someone who had been her best friend for years. She is still 19 and is still dominated, to some degree, by her emotions and I am trying to show that. I am also trying to show her coping with the aftermath of war. I appreciate your comments and just wanted to explain my reasonings for writing the character the way I did. I would also like to express AGAIN that this is my first fanfic and I am growing as a writer, and learning how to balance a story. 
> 
> In Lighter news...I will be doing a Q/A for the next week until Sunday June 7, 2020. You can post your questions in comments below and I will try to respond to them on Sunday before I post my next chapter unless I feel the answer may take away from the plot in which I will say "no comment". Thank you for the wonderful reviews and hope you continue reading to see how the story turns out.


	26. Advice from Canvas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

The next day at breakfast Hermione approached Professor McGonagall and requested permission to use her Pensieve. The old professor was hesitant at first but after Hermione pleaded the Scottish woman relented, though she was not happy Hermione wouldn’t tell her what she needed the device for. She gave Hermione a firm pat on the hand, and with a look full of questions simply told her that she would be allowed access to the Pensieve at approximately half seven that Friday night, during the evening feast. 

Hermione enjoyed her Thursday classes, even if she had felt the weight of the memories in her pocket the entire time. She had thought about leaving them in her room, but she was worried that Nott would change his mind and steal them away before she had gotten a chance to look at them. If he really asked her not to watch them she would respect his decision, but she wanted him to have to face her in order to change his mind. So, the memories stayed in her pocket safely the entire day. 

In D.A.D.A. Hermione sat herself down next to Harry and got out her materials for the class. Professor Jacobson hurried down the stairs from his office, opting not to jump over the bannister like he usually did.

“Good Afternoon, class!” He announced as he made it down the final step, “I hope everyone has been having a wonderful week.” There were several murmurs of agreement as he moved to his usual position of sitting on top of his desk. The sunlight streaming in through the window caused his hair to show brilliant red highlights throughout the usually dark brown hair.“That’s great. Today we are going to have to discuss some dark things. Ideally, everyone will participate in the discussions we will be having, but if at any time you feel incapable of participating, you are more than welcome to leave the class without need for explanation, understand?” Everyone nodded their agreement, “Ok, so...I would like to impose a philosophical question to you. Why is it that the Killing Curse is considered an Unforgivable?” 

The class was silent for a few moments before Terry Boot answered in a deep voice, “Because it kills whoever it is aimed at.” The Ravenclaw rolled his eyes at the easy question before leaning back in his chair. 

“That is true Mr. Boot, but so does Fiendfyre.” Boot’s brow scrunched in confusion before nodding slowly as if he hadn’t considered that. Everyone shifted uncomfortably in their seats as they sat there waiting for the professor to explain why the Killing Curse was deemed an Unforgivable. The Professor on the other hand seemed to be waiting for another student to take a guess. After several awkward minutes of silence when there were no other guesses forthcoming Professor Jacobson jumped down from his desk. Several heads instantly lowered to their papers, knowing that if their professor was walking around he would be picking students randomly to answer the question. For some reason the students believed that if they didn’t make eye contact they would be invisible to him, and therefore safe from class participation. Finally, Professor Jacobson stopped at a desk near the back and prompted, “Mr. Malfoy?” Malfoy had been keeping his eyes on his desk since the beginning of the discussion, and still refused to look up, “Why is the Killing curse an Unforgivable?” 

Hermione watched as Draco slowly brought his head up, his eyes briefly flicking to Nott and then to her as he cleared his throat.“There is no other use for this curse,” He whispered, “The killing curse was designed with one purpose, and it cannot be used for anything other than fulfilling that purpose. With Fiendfyre you could destroy a horcrux, or fight off inferi.” His eyes flicked to Nott again before he cleared his throat and spoke slightly louder, “With other spells or curses you can adjust the power to make them hurt your opponent slightly, or do maximum damage. With an Avada...you are only going to kill someone.” 

“Exactly, twenty points to Slytherin!” Professor Jacobson intoned, before continuing, “So, would you consider that the worst of the three Unforgivables then?” Mafloy shook his head slightly. When it appeared like Malfoy was not going to proceed Professor Jacobson lightly cued him,“Well?” 

“The Imperius is worse.” Malfoy sighed out simply. 

“Care to elaborate,” Professor Jacobson inquired as he turned around walking back down the aisle and towards the front of the classroom. When he reached the front he turned around and faced the Slytherin. 

“I would rather die than have someone have complete control of my mind ever again.” Malfoy answered simply. 

“Anyone else care to expand on what Mr. Malfoy just said?” 

“The Cruciatus.” Hermione heard the words leave her mouth, but she didn't remember speaking them. Malfoy and Nott both looked at her intently, as did the rest of the class. She didn’t really feel the other students stares though as she locked eyes with the two Slytherins. Professor Jacobson waited patiently for her to continue, and after taking several deep steadying breaths she did. “I-I think that the Cruciatus is worse than the Imperius curse.” Hermione felt Harry put a warm hand on her back. She barely noticed herself grab her forearm and rub it unconsciously, “I would rather be under the Imperius than the Cruciatus.” 

“Have you ever been under the Imperius?” Malfoy questioned quietly on the other side of the room. She shook her head slightly, “Then you don't know.” His eyes flicked to Harry’s, “Potter, you’ve been under all three. Which is worse?” 

“I would have to say that I don’t really fancy being under any of them ever again.” Harry replied, taking off his glasses and cleaning them on the edge of his robe.

“That’s the thing though isn’t it?” Seamus joined in from the back of the room, “It would depend on the person who is under the curses preferences.”

“Excellent observation, Mr. Finnigan.” The professor began writing on the black board then, “I want you to spend the weekend writing an essay on the origins of each curse along with which curse you would least want to be subjected to. Twelve inches at least.” The rest of the class was spent discussing how these three curses had become illegal in the first place, along with a long discussion about how people were forgiven for casting these curses during the war. No matter how hard she tried she couldn't keep her eyes from traveling back to Nott, who had remained quiet and passive during the entire exchange. 

* * *

After dinner that Friday, Hermione rose from the Gryffindor table, and with a look in Nott’s direction gave him a nod that she hoped conveyed what she was about to do. It seemed to work because Hermione barely made it twenty steps outside of the Great Hall when the familiar sound of footsteps approached her. 

“Granger,” drawled the cool indifferent voice of Malfoy. 

“Yes?” She tried not to seem like she was in a hurry but she couldn't help but glance behind her shoulder in the direction of the Head Mistresses office. Malfoy had his arms crossed, and leaned back on his feet in a somewhat guarded pose. He looked more tired than she had seen him since before sixth year, with dark circles under his eyes and a drawn face. His normally pristine oxford was wrinkled and his pants were lacking their normal crease from good ironing. He watched her wearily for a few seconds, glancing behind him to make sure there was no one else following them he began to speak quietly. 

“Theo sent me. He said that...well he said he gave you memories?” The last part of the sentence was inclined as a question. He stood there, torchlight flickering across his blond hair, and pale grey eyes as he awaited her response. She eyed him for a moment before reaching into her robe pocket and revealing the small glass vial of tears. 

Malfoy's eyes went wide. He stared at the vial for several minutes before shaking his head causing his blond hair to fall down on his pale forehead. He coughed and swallowed a few times as if trying to clear his throat, “He wants me to go with you...for after.” Malfoy kept his voice low, but his eyes never left the vial. 

“Maybe I want to do this alone.” She stated before turning on her heel and walking back in the direction of the office. Malfoy let her turn a corner of the corridor before grabbing her shoulder and flinging her around to face him. 

“Damnnit Granger this isn’t a game.” He ran his long fingers through his hair, causing it to stick up at odd ends, oddly reminiscent of the way Harry’s own black tresses tended to do, “Theo told me he really wasn’t emotionally stable when he handed you those. Do you know what that means?” She gave him an incredulous look before rolling her eyes. 

“Of course I do. But I am sure whatever residual memories got locked into the vial with the ones he wants me to see will be fine. I can handle-”

“No you can't.” Malfoy cut her off, his voice raised so much it nearly echoed off the stone walls, “Not because I think you’re weak or something like that.” He responded quickly when her eyes flashed at him dangerously, “You have no idea what he’s been through. No Granger listen-” he exclaimed as she opened her mouth to talk, she closed her lips but narrowed her eyes in anger, “If even one of the memories he has kept locked away happened to make it past his barriers you are going to have trouble looking him in the eye again. Not because you fear him or don't trust him but because you will not understand how he is still standing. How do you think he knew about your panic attacks before the rest of us? How do you think he knew _what_ they were?” 

She thought about it for a moment. She thought about how he almost always knew what to do to make it better when she was having a bad day. Her mind was drawn to a particularly painful day in October when her chest had felt tight like someone was sitting on it from the moment she woke up all the way to the end of D.A.D.A.. At the end of class, Theo had taken her and Draco outside to the courtyard and confiscated their bags and books. He had made them lay on a blanket he had transfigured from his own scarf. In the middle of the small field that led down to the Black Lake they had laid together and watched the sky as it had darkened. They spoke in quiet tones the whole time, occasionally pointing out clouds that took familiar shapes. Once it was dark, Theo had cast a simple charm that had caused small lights to circle the group like stars in the sky. She smiled slightly at the memory but then furrowed her brow. She hadn’t told him she was upset, he had just seemed to know. He always knew. 

“He has been through so fucking much, and he knows some of his memories might cause negative reactions for you.” Malfoy motioned towards her with one pale hand, as the other was jammed into the pocket of his trousers, “He can’t watch them, that’s why he locked them away with his Occlumency. He did it so he couldn't feel that pain anymore. So he could make it through a day without feeling like he was drowning. Lucky for both of us I have happened to see some of what he has gone through first hand so he trusts me to help you if you need it.” 

Draco didn’t sound like it was lucky that he had seen them at all. He sounded defeated, “So, like it or not I am coming with that bushy head of yours as you plunge it into the water. Besides I am pretty sure that those curls will drag you under if they get wet, and you will end up drowning yourself. Someone needs to be there to pull you up if necessary. They must weigh a ton when wet.” He gave her a weak smile at the end of his explanation and started off in the direction of the Head Mistress’ Office. 

She considered asking Professor McGonagall for a new day to watch the memories, and just refusing to tell either Slytherin about it. She was worried that this might be her only chance to see them though, and her curiosity was getting the better of her as she stood still in the hallway. Taking a deep breath she hurried after the blond as her mind whirled. Surely Malfoy was exaggerating. There was no way that what Nott went through compared to being hunted, attacked, and tortured for seven years. Not to mention what Malfoy went through at being a Death Eater at sixteen, and having to save your mother from being killed by a murderous psychopath. 

They had finally made it inside McGonagall’s office using the password McGonagall had given Hermione. The office was significantly more clean than it had been when Dumbledore had been headmaster. Gone were the numerous trinkets and devices that had lined the walls and tables. There was still a perch next to the desk itself, but instead of a Phoenix there now sat a sleepy Barred owl. It hooted at them once, before disappearing through a small circular window towards the top of the room. There were several new bookshelves lining the walls, and a comfy looking seating area off next to the fireplace. They were standing in front of the door to the Pensieve waiting for it to register their need for it so the device would float out like it always did. 

“Are you going in with me?” Malfoy shook his head slightly.

“He asked me not to. He said they’re not for me to see. I am just here for when you come back out.” She let a breath out through her nose, her hand clenching over the vial of memories as they waited in the quiet of the office. 

“Miss Granger, Mr. Malfoy out for an evening stroll,” a familiar voice seeped into the room at the speed of cold syrup. Hermione glanced up and saw a portrait just above where the Pensieve was located. A familiar pale face with long greasy black hair stared at her with one eyebrow cocked in confusion at the peculiar scene in front of him. 

“Severus,” Malfoy responded. “Hermione is here to watch some memories.” 

“Oh...whose?” Their former potions professor asked. He had started to lean against a plush chair that was included in his painting as he eyed his Godson.

“You don’t want to know.” Malfoy responded quietly as the door to the Pensieve finally opened and the device floated towards them. Another voice drew their attention behind them as the device crept closer. 

“No, we really are curious. Not a lot of interesting things happen when you are just painting on the wall. Two of my favorite students skipping dinner, however, to come up here and watch memories? Now that’s intriguing to say the least.” Professor Dumbldores portrait chuckled while peering at them from over his half moon spectacles. 

“Theodore Nott’s” Hermione told Dumbldore, as she uncorked the vial and poured the memories into the Pensieve. The thick liquid spilled from the vial creating a seemingly endless stream of white for several seconds before the last bit hit the water with an audible _plop_. 

“Miss Granger,” Snape intoned from his place on the wall, “Why would Mr. Nott give you his memories?” 

“I don’t believe that is any of your business,” Hermione replied hastily, blinking at the Pensieve. She felt Draco shift next to her nervously as the memories swirled within the liquid.

“No, I suppose it’s not.” Snape's voice seemed to crawl through the room as she gathered her courage. “Do you know much about his history?” 

“No.” 

“Mmmm, well let me give you a little advice.” Professor Snape waited for her chocolate eyes to lock on his dark ones before he continued, “Remember that what has happened is in the past. It’s nothing you can change, and it’s nothing you can fix.” Snape's voice bordered boredom as he investigated his canvas nails.

“You are simply an observer to this boy's memories, not a participant.” Dumbledore called from his frame, “Know that it has taken a great deal of trust for him to allow you to see what he has offered.” 

Hermione gave both painted men a small nod before moving closer to the Pensieve. She hesitated for a moment, but then she felt Draco give her hand a small reassuring squeeze. Feeling slightly better she took a deep breath. Right as she plunged her head down into the Pensieve she heard Snape mutter a quiet, “Good luck,” as she entered the awaiting memories of Lord Theodore Nott.


	27. Memories of the Tortured Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).
> 
> A/N 2: Since this is a memory any mentions of Hermione that are past versions of her will be called 'Hermione' if mentioned by name to try and limit confusion. This was difficult to write and I hope I made it clear enough. Also if Nott is used as a name, it SHOULD only be mentioning Theodore, as that is what Hermione calls him most days. Any other members of the Nott family should not be called "Nott" directly. I have no Beta so I am sorry if there are mistakes in this chapter.
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING: This chapter contains mention of Child/Domestic Abuse, and death. Please read at your own risk. I tried to put warnings at the beginning of each section (Separated by page breaks) that had these triggers in them, but I may have missed one so here is a blanket warning. There will be a short summary at the bottom!

As Hermione tumbled through empty space awaiting the first memory to materialize she let her mind race. Usually when someone releases memories into a Pensieve they are calm and collected, this calm mentality allows the witch or wizard to ensure that only the memory chosen has been selected and placed in the device. Hermione knew that Nott was trying to find a way to prove that he was trustworthy to her, that what he told her the day he kissed her was the truth. At the same time she feared what memories may have been included when he hadn’t wanted them to. It felt like even more of an invasion of his privacy to realize that she was about to see a portion of memories that he may not have wanted her to see at all. She could always pull out now; leave the memories once and for all, and forget about that night in the greenhouse. She needed to see what he offered though. She needed to know the truth. Summoning her courage she felt her feet hit solid stone flooring before blinking a couple of times and looking at her surroundings. 

Hermione was now standing in what she assumed to be the Slytherin common room. There were dark green and silver tapestries hanging behind a large ornate fireplace with carvings of snakes built into the mantlepiece. On the back edge there was a wall of glass that led out into the Black Lake, giving the entire common room an eerie green glow, which was only increased by the occasional green flames flickering in sconces. What drew her attention though was a group of young students sitting on one of the black couches positioned just before the fire. 

The room was deserted except for four small boys. She would know that shock of white-blond hair anywhere. Smirking she rolled her eyes as she approached a young Draco Malfoy. Draco’s hair was slicked back, so it had to be either first or second year. He was sitting across next to Zabini, across from them were younger versions of Crabbe and Goyle. Hermione felt her stomach twist when looking at Crabbe, her last memory of him being his face twisted in fear right before he was consumed by his own Fiendfyre. The four boys seemed to be playing a game of Exploding Snap. As she watched, Zabini took the win and turned to Malfoy, who had been getting more agitated the longer they played. 

“What’s got your wand in a knot?” 

“Granger.”

“What about her?” Zabini scrunched his face in confusion as Goyle began to redistribute the cards for another game. When Zabini raised his hand to show they wouldn’t be playing another round, Goyle heistated slumping back into his seat with a drawn out sigh. Crabbe just stared at his school bag as if contemplating homework he wasn’t going to turn in. 

“She just needs put in her place.”

“Where exactly is her place, Malfoy?” The voice was lower than the others, but raised in pitch at the end of the sentence as if on the cusp of puberty. Hermione turned to face it’s owner, noticing for the first time the dark haired boy positioned behind the wall of glass, in a corner away from the rest. He was vaguely familiar. Her eyes got round in their sockets when she recognized Theodore Nott, at around 12 or 13. 

“What do you mean, Nott?” Goyle grunted from his place in his chair while putting his deck of cards in his pocket. 

“I was talking to Malfoy, Goyle.” Nott hadn’t looked up from the book he was reading, but carefully he set it aside as if it was made of porcelain, before standing up and striding over to where Malfoy sat. Draco quickly stood so that he was eye level with the other boy. 

“Her place is the same as all other Mudbloods-”

“Don’t.” Theo hissed through clenched teeth, “Don’t say that word.” 

“But that’s what she is. She is a filthy little Mudblood-” Whatever Draco was going to say next was lost to his thoughts as Theodore Nott threw a quick left jab to Malfoy's nose followed by a right hook to his jaw. Malfoy stumbled back a few steps before collapsing to his knee and holding his nose.

“Merlin,” Blaise huffed, jumping over the back of the couch he was sitting to put distance between the squabbling second years. 

“Nott-” Crabbe and Goyle both stood from their chairs and made their way over to Draco, diligently helping their leader to his feet as he clutched his nose. 

“If you _ever_ call her that word again in my presence, I will make it so your family won't have to bother looking for a pure-blood witch to marry you.” Theo took a step closer to Draco shaking out his hand which was beginning to bruise, “Instead they will be busy considering if they want marble or granite for your headstone. Got it?” Draco nodded furiously before shrugging off the helpful hands of his two brutes.

“Are you going to tell your father?” Goyle asked in a low tone as Nott moved away from the group of boys. Upon hearing the hushed question Nott turned around and raised an eyebrow at his blond Housemate. Draco stared at him for a couple of moments before squaring his shoulders. 

“No. Neither are any of you! If I hear of a single person breathing about what happened just now to anyone outside of this room you will live to regret it.” Draco pulled himself up tall and kept his eyes on Nott. They shared an nonverbal conversation, similar to the way they often did now, before Nott nodded and made his way through a hidden door. Hermione assumed it led to the dormitories, but as she made to follow him the memory shifted just as she reached the door. 

* * *

Hermione was standing next to a memory of Nott. He was sitting on a window seat in the castle near the bottom floor. His back was leaned up against the wall of the window sill, with one foot resting on the ground the other bent at the knee with his foot on the sill, his robes hanging loosely down his body. She watched him read an advanced Ancient Runes book, having it propped on his bent knee. She observed him for a couple of minutes before he raised his wand and cast a quick tempus spell, after checking the time his eyes flicked up to the end of the hallway before looking quickly back down to his book. 

Hermione peered down the hallway that he had chanced a glance at when finally a memory of herself turned the corner. It looked like it might have been fifth year, and she was chatting with Luna as they laughed in the hallway. They were probably heading to the Great Hall for lunch based on the time of day. As non-memory Hermione watched, Nott pulled his gaze and looked up as the witches sauntered past. ‘Hermione’ didn’t seem to notice he was even there, but Luna gave him a smile as she passed. The sun was streaming through the windows, and it was almost like the scene was moving in slow motion as ‘Hermione’ stepped into a spot of sun that was clinging to the ground. Watching the other girls move forward, Hermione heard Nott’s breath hitch as the light hit her younger self’s hair causing it to erupt in a halo of beautiful golds and bronzes that she had never noticed before. 

“I love the gold color of the sun,” Luna sighed dreamily as she half skipped and spread her hands out as if she was absorbing the layers of sunlight like a plant. “It’s so warm and full of life! What’s your favorite color, Hermione?” 

“I’ve always been rather fond of lavender.” ‘Hermione’ answered with a small laugh before pulling the ditsy Ravenclaw behind her and turning the corner. 

Hermione saw Nott’s lips pull into a small half smile that caused his dimple to show. His eyes were her color now...that precious forget-me-not. He blinked a couple of times and they returned to their usual royal blue before he pulled himself up and packed his book. Nott eventually followed the girls, causing Hermione to walk with him to keep up with the memory. He walked quickly around the corner to the Great Hall for lunch, taking a seat next to a disgruntled Malfoy.

“What’s got you in such a dreadfully cheerful mood?” Draco grunted as he shoved some potatoes around his plate. The other Slytherins sat around chatting idly, keeping their elbows off the table, as Draco glanced up at his dark haired friend. Nott shrugged, but gave Draco a half smile as he grabbed a banana, peeling it and taking a big bite causing his cheeks to puff out as he chewed like a chipmunk. Draco glanced around making sure all the other students were preoccupied with other conversations before whispering harshly to Nott. 

“Better not be Granger again.”

“I am telling you Malfoy...she is perfect.”

“If you care about that witch at all you will stay the fuck away from her.” Draco hissed, “She has enough of a target on her back without getting your father in the mix.” Nott’s face fell, as he tossed his banana down on a plate that was in front of him. 

“You’re right,” Theo growled, then as if a sudden thought just occurred to him he glanced quickly at Draco, “If the Dark Lord wins…”

“We will cross that bridge when we get there.” Draco whispered slowly, “Keep your head down, yeah?” The memory began to ripple and swirl, changing as both boys looked up and made eye contact with ‘Hermione’ at the Gryffindor table, who rewarded their glance with a snarl. 

* * *

“Where is my brave Teddy Bear?” A woman asked in mock confusion as she crept around a large bedroom. The bed, which was massive, had several toys all over it. The room was decorated in a pretty grey with rich blue accents. She noticed a familiar quilt with the Nott family crest resting on the bed. There were dark rich brown book shelves all around and a large chest filled with numerous toys. Along the wall she saw several toy brooms all mounted. She heard a child giggle from behind a dark wooden door on the other side of the room. The door was open just a crack, allowing the giggles to escape the confines. The woman’s eyes flicked over to the door before putting a long thin finger to her chin and tapped it with childlike-playfulness. 

The woman was wearing expensive silk robes. Her wavy blond hair was hanging loosely along her shoulders. She gazed around the room, as if on an imaginary safari, investigating every nook and cranny. She had pale skin, and rosy cheeks with eyes of a beautiful cerulean that held intelligence within their depths. As the lady glanced around, Hermione could hear giggles stifled on the other side of the room. 

Hermione immediately knew this was a memory that she was not supposed to see. She felt like she was trespassing on the mind of Nott by watching, but it wasn’t like she could choose to leave. If she did leave, she wouldn’t be able to see what other memories he had provided. If she wanted to see what else he had given her, she would have to stay. So, instead of leaving, Hermione watched on intently as the women continued her hunt.

“My sweet little Teddy Bear has disappeared? Oh no! Who will I cuddle when the dark comes? Who will save me from the evil things that go bump in the night?” The blond let out a dramatic sigh before flopping on the bed. There was a noise towards the door that Hermione had noticed and a small boy of maybe four or five wearing footie pajamas jumped out from his hiding place. The footie pajama’s were covered in dragons that flew around his legs and arms, as he put his tiny fists on his hips, reminiscent of a superhero pose. His dark hair was just long enough to start coming down in waves over his tiny ears.

“I will mummy,” He declared confidently. The woman, Nott’s mother Hermione decided, smiled at her son, a familiar small dimple forming on the side of one of her cheeks. Puffing out his little chest, bright blue eyes shining in determination he ran across the floor. He lost his footing and slipped just before the bed landing hard on his forehead. He let out a little cry as the woman rushed forward, long golden locks of hair flowing behind her as she leaned down to scoop the small boy into a hug. 

“Oh, Teddy. Let me see,” She gently pulled his tiny hands from his face. There was a small scrape on his forehead. His mother gave it a small smile, and summoned a washcloth from the bathroom with a wave of her wand. She noticed that the woman wet the towel with a simple _Aguamenti_ before treating it as if she was a muggle. She ended the treatment with a kiss to the affected area before banishing the washcloth to the dirty clothes hamper and turning back to her son. “You were so brave. Maybe you will be a Gryffindor!” Hermione stared at the woman shocked. She had never heard much about Nott’s mother but always assumed she would be similar to Narcissa Malfoy. A Pure-blooded Slytherin purist from the tips of her manicured toes to the roots of her perfect hair. 

“Maybe,” The little boy twisted his mouth while moving his head sideways as if weighing his options within what she had said. 

“You got another house in mind?” She queried, picking him up and propping him on her hip. Giving him a quick tickle, she caused adorable little boy giggles to raise through the room once again. 

“Father says I have to go to Slytherin.” He nodded his head once. His mother became quiet for a moment before tucking him under the black satin sheets, and pulling up the quilt. 

“You know...one of my friends was a Gryffindor?” She told him, making sure to tuck in the sides of his quilt.

“Really?”

She nodded, “Yes, her name was Sarah. We used to practice charms together every night in the library. You’re Uncle Sirius was a Gryffindor too. I also had a friend named Connor who was Ravenclaw. But...my absolute _best_ friend was Hufflepuff. His name was Caiden, and he was the nicest boy I have ever met...until my Teddy Bear that is.” She gave him a warm smile as she cozied up to him, laying against his headboard, and giving him a kiss on his head.

“Can I meet him?” His mother looked at him for a second, and grief passed quickly before she shook her head. Hermione saw the emotion, but the little boy had been distracted by a wind-up toy that started flying around the room. 

“No, you can't. He died long ago, though I am sure you would have been the best of friends.” She whispered sadly, summoning a book from a nearby bookshelf while starting to get comfortable in the bed.

“Mummy, whats a Mudblood?” Hermione saw the women's blue eyes go wide in shock before she turned to face her son. 

Her mouth opened several times as her eyes searched the young boy's face before she finally sputtered, “Where...Where did you hear that word?”

“Draco told me, his father told him, that since the Dark Lord has gone away we would have to go to school with dirty Mudbloods.” Hermione winced every time that word passed such innocent lips, and she noticed that she was not the only one as Nott’s mother's eyebrows scrunched in pain. 

“That word just means that the witch or wizards mummy and father didn’t have magic.” She explained, “Want to know a secret?” She slowly leaned down so that she could whisper in his ear. Hermione had to get very close to the bed in order to hear the whispered words. “Caiden was one.”

Theo looked at her with bright blue eyes as she nodded. “But we should _never_ call them that. Do you hear me?” Theo nodded slowly in understanding, “We call them muggle-borns. But if you want my opinion they shouldnt have a seperate name at all. They are just witches and wizards. Like you and me.” He nodded again. 

“Ok, where did we leave off?”

“They just left Tom Bomafils?”

“That’s Bombadil, Teddy,” She corrected gently as she opened a well worn copy of _The Fellowship of the Ring_ by J.R.R. Tolkien. Hermione stared in awe at the title as Lady Nott began to read her son his favorite bedtime story from a muggle book...as the world rippled out and was replaced with a new memory. 

* * *

“You have to protect her, Draco.” Nott was pacing a dorm room. His hands rubbing up and down his face as he tried to to calm himself down. The room was a double person suite, and the colors made it clear she was once again in the Slytherin dormitories. Both boys looked extremely stressed, but their bags remained packed beside their trunks indicating it was still early in the school year. “They weren’t on the train, they weren’t at the feast. She fucking went with them. Why couldn’t she stay here...why did she have to fucking go with Potter on what is probably a fucking suicide mission?” 

“Nott...Mate you have to calm down.” Draco stood in front of his friend putting both hands on his shoulders, “It’s just Granger. I’ll never understand what you see in her anyway.” Theo pulled from his arms and stared at him as if he had spoken gibberish. 

“What do you mean? She is beautiful and talented and powerful and compassionate and courageous and smart-”

“She’s a Mud...muggle-born.”

“You know I’ve never given a second thought to that.” Theo sneered, storming across the room flinging things off his desk in frustration as he went. He grabbed a small package wrapped in lavender wrapping paper and shoving it into the wooden chest at the foot of the bed. 

“Your father will,” Malfoy stated, stepping closer. “You know what he will do to her if he finds out about this.” Malfoy hissed, gesturing to Theo with one of his hands. 

“That’s why he will never find out, and you are going to promise me you will help her if you can.” He nodded factually, as he closed the chest before sitting down on the edge of his bed. His outburst now over, his Occlumency walls pulled back behind his eyes at the mention of his father. 

“Why the fuck would I do that?” Malfoy scoffed, scrunching his eyebrows together before flinging himself down on his own mattress. 

“Because if she dies during this...I am going to the Dark Lord and telling him to fuck off right in his face.” Theo's eyes stared back at Draco's in a silent challenge. Draco waited for his eyes to move. To blink. To show any signs of a lie. They sat there as Malfoy stared him down, waiting for any sign of hesitation. When none was found the blond let out a long sigh. 

“You would kill yourself? For her?” Draco grunted out in disbelief, one pale eyebrow cocked in question.

“No, but I will try to kill any fucker that harms her. If that happens to be the most powerful evil wizard and I get killed doing it...at least I won't have to live in a world without her. Draco...I-I love her.”

“Shite.” Malfoy’s grey eyes looked back at the wall, his mind clearly moving fast in thought. Finally, after several long moments he spoke again quietly, “Why not take the Mark? You would have a better chance of protecting her then." Draco ran his hands through his pale hair, as grey eyes locked on Theo’s royal blue ones. 

“I can’t take it, my mother-,” Theo let out a long sigh, “She would have never forgiven me.”

“What exactly do you want me to do?!?” Draco stood quickly, pacing a similar path to what Nott had just done. 

“I don’t know Draco...just please try to help her if you can.” Theo sounded small as he finished his plea. Draco stopped his pacing and stared at his best friend for several moments before relenting and releasing a long puff of air. 

“If I can figure out a way to help the Golden Trio of Idiots...I will. For you.” Theo nodded and the world began to fade again. 

* * *

Hermione was now standing in front of Nott in the Hogwarts library. She could tell by all the Beauxbatons girls it was fourth year. She watched as he wrote a little bit on parchment before scoffing to himself and crumpling the page. His eyes kept glancing through a small opening between a couple of books on a shelf to his right. She leaned down and looked through the empty spot so she could see what he was so distracted by. There ‘Hermione’ was in her normal study spot reading a book. 

Occasionally, a student would walk up to her in order to ask her a question which she would answer quickly, and wave them off to find whatever they had asked her about. She watched as the sun came through the window behind her, making her hair erupt in the golden halo again. She had ink smudged on her thumb, and she was wearing her school uniform, her red and gold tie slightly askew. As she watched, ‘Hermione’ glanced through the opening in the bookshelf, and Nott quickly glanced back at the desk. Her younger self furrowed her brows, before shaking her head as if to clear it of a strange thought, before going back to her studying.

After a couple of seconds, Nott glanced back up at her and released a long breath before shoving himself from the table and standing. He began to pace back and forth in the area between the bookshelves. His long legs only allowed him a couple of steps before he had to turn around again. Muttering to himself the entire time, “Ok, Theo you got this. Just walk up and ask ‘Granger, want to go with me...to the ball I mean’. _Fuck_! I can't even say it when she’s way over there.”

He growled as he ran his hands over his face. Taking one last glance at her through the small opening between the shelves he spoke again quietly,“C’mon man. You’ve faced worse than this...just go.” Hermione smiled at his little pep talk as he paced the length of the aisle he had been situated in. He finally grabbed his bag, flinging it over his shoulder and started towards the end of the aisle. He walked determined to the stack she was seated in, and just as he was about to walk up to her Viktor Krum appeared as if from nowhere, only the occasional giggles of young school girls to announce his presence. Viktor pushed Nott out of the way, as if he had not seen the young boy. 

Viktor cleared his throat before announcing with little pomp, “Herminny, would you go to the Yule Ball with me?” Theo stood at the end of the aisle, just out of her sight. His mouth stayed agape for several seconds, before he turned quickly and practically ran out of the library. Hermione watched his retreating form as the memory morphed into something new. 

* * *

**Trigger Warning: Child Abuse/Torture**

Hermione stood in front of a man who resembled Theo to a shocking degree. William Nott. She felt herself let out a small gasp as she instinctively stepped back. It was like he was looking directly at her. Remembering she was in a memory she glanced behind her, and saw Theodore was standing there. It looked like it was the summer before sixth year. He had begun to fill out a little more, especially around the face, giving himself a strong jawline. There was still a hint of stringy limbs, his arms and legs elongating faster than the rest of his body could keep up. His blue eyes were emotionless as he stared at his father. 

His father had the same dark wavy hair as Theo, but he seemed to be slightly taller than the boy was even now. His shoulders were drew back in a haughty confidence only born of years being told that you were better than everyone else. He had dark stubble that lined his jaw but only added to his rugged good-looks. His eyes were the blue of storm clouds as he stared at his son. They were near carbon copies, except that Theo had his dimple and the scruff William sported. 

“Don’t you want to join the cause son?” His father asked in a very quiet tone. They were standing in Theo’s bedroom. Gone was the chest full of toys, but the mounted kid brooms remained. There were several adult brooms added to the growing collection on his wall. His number of book shelves had increased, and she caught herself looking for the worn copy of the _The Fellowship of the Ring_. She couldn’t find it before Theo’s emotionless voice rang through the room. 

“No.” Theo intoned simply. His occlumency was as strong as she had ever seen it. He looked like he had no emotion at all, almost like a robot in a sci-fi movie just going through the motions. 

“Why not? Don’t you want that stupid Mudblood bitch gone so you can graduate top of the class?” His father questioned before walking slowly behind Theodore. 

“If I cannot beat the muggle-born then that is my own failure.” Theo’s deep monotonous voice rang out. 

“Say it.” William paced around his son once more, his wand held menacingly in his hand, was now aimed at his son. 

“No.”

“Say it or you will end up just like that whore you called mother.”

“Then so be it. Let the house of Nott fall with me over one stupid word.” Nott replied, his voice remained calm and steady. Hermione watched in astonishment as Theo defied his father. She was impressed by his bravery, but couldn’t help the mounting feeling of dread that had dropped into her gut like a brick. 

“Your mother made you so weak. It would be better if the House of Nott had died with me.” His father hissed in a low threatening tone, “But instead, I have you, son. Why don’t we reevaluate the power of one word... _Crucio_.” Hermione instinctively moved to protect him, reaching for her wand that was not on her incorporeal form here in the Pensieve. Realizing there was nothing she could do, and feeling useless, she stayed on her feet. Standing off to the side of the scene as it played out. This was another memory she was never meant to see, so she was forced to watch instead. She was forced to watch the memory of the boy she loved being tortured by his father.

Theodore’s face twitched, but otherwise he showed no other outward signs of the curse hitting him. It seemed Theo had grown a resistance to the curse, which only happened after repeated exposure as he was still under the curse, and had yet to scream She watched, biting her lip until it bled, as William put more force behind the curse until finally his son dropped to his knees. Theo’s mouth opened in a silent cry of pain and his veins began to bulge as the curse became more powerful. Hermione’s heart was pounding by the time he _finally_ screamed, only stopping as his father partnered the rounds of the cruciatus curse with a slicing hex. This continued on until the grey shirt Nott was wearing, and the floor beneath his knees were drenched in his blood. When the curse ended, the only outward signs of Theo’s pain that showed on his face were a few stray tears that fell from his eyes as his Occlumency held strong. 

“You will go to the Dark Lord when you graduate just like all your other classmates. That, or you will die just like your mother.” William sneered as he walked towards the door, “Remember you are a failure, son. You will be a failure until you learn the ways of this world. I want to see those wounds as evidence of your negligence to your inheritance. Do not heal them or we will have this discussion again.” Theodore nodded, gasping for air on the floor, while maintaining eye contact with his deranged father. William smiled cruelly before walking out of the room as the memory faded again. 

* * *

Hermione stood with Theo in his room in the Head’s living quarters. She saw him stand in front of a mirror as he pulled trousers on. Hermione was extremely confused to see scars running up and down his body. She had seen him shirtless before, and she didn’t remember those scars being there. They ranged from a few inches to almost a foot and a half in length and were thick and puckered. They were all over his arms, back, and chest to the point it looked like he was a doll stitched together. Evidence of repeated abuse at the end of a dark curse. From the previous memory she had a good idea of what, or more specifically who, had caused them.

“NOTT!” She heard her own voice call. She watched as Nott smiled before starting to dig through the chest at the foot of his bed for something. He grabbed a small package with lavender paper before rolling his eyes. “Not yet,” She heard him whisper as he dropped it back into the chest. 

She heard her voice say something else followed by loud pounding on the door, before Nott cursed under his breath and grabbed his wand. He cast an illusion spell that covered the scars before calling out “Salazar’s great beard, Granger,” ripping the door open. 

She then had the honor of watching herself from the past. Her past self very blatantly drew her eyes down his chest and checked him out. Only ‘Hermione’ didn’t realize that she was looking at a lie. She hoped she got to tell him that she liked him better without the illusion. When it was fully him she was seeing. She watched them have a short conversation about quidditch while he pulled on a shirt. Eventually, ‘Hermione’ left him standing there alone. Hermione then watched as he went into the old trunk, pushing past the wrapped package and pulled out a picture of his mother standing with him in her arms and waving at the camera with his tiny fist wrapped around her thumb. “You would like her mum,” He sighed as the memory disappeared around her. 

* * *

**Trigger Warning: Domestic/Child Abuse, Torture, and Death**

She was dropped into a small lounge. There was a fireplace positioned behind William Nott who stood before the woman Hermione knew to be Theodore’s mother. She was staring at William with proud defiant eyes, her chin raised. The man’s eyes were the familiar color of storm clouds as he began to speak in a cool voice. These two figures stood opposite of each other, him dressed in black robes, and her in a pretty pale blue sundress. The walls were a cream color but darkness seemed to cling to the corners of the room. “Would you like to know what my son, and heir said to me this afternoon?” William questioned patiently, his voice like oil as it spread across the room. 

“Something intelligent I am sure,” Nott’s mother replied in a similar cool voice. It was so different from the one that she used with Theodore that Hermione had to take a second look at her to verify this was the same woman. Indeed she was, with the same wavy blond hair, and cerulean eyes guarded against her husband. 

“He told me that I shouldn’t say the word Mudblood.” William continued flippantly, “That his new imaginary friend was one. What was his new friend's name again...oh yes _Caiden_.” William narrowed his eyes, as he began to pace around the small woman. Once he was behind her, Hermione saw the look of fear and panic cross Nott’s mother’s face, but it was quickly replaced by a cool facade that reminded Hermione so much of the woman's son. “Tell me...why would our son think of that name?” 

“Maybe he read it in a book-”

“ _Crucio.”_ Hermione stood rooted to her spot in fear as the man tortured his wife. The woman thrashed in pain on the floor between two sofas. She screamed until the force of her screams caused blood to start pouring from her throat. This was probably the worst use of the spell Hermione had ever seen and that included when she was the one who had been laying under its power. The way the curse cut through the woman’s body made what Bellatrix did to Hermione look like child's play. The woman’s veins on her face were standing tight against her skin as her muscles contorted into unnatural shapes against the pain. 

“Stand you filthy fucking whore,” William growled as he lowered his wand, “Maybe if you dont lie to me it will stop.”

After several long panting moments Nott’s mother took a deep breath. Her eyes flicked to the door, and with effort that Hermione thought impossible she hauled herself onto shaky legs. Hermione, who was so caught up in what was happening in front of her, snapped her eyes in the direction that held the woman's attention, curious as to what had given her the strength to stand. 

Hermione was forced to remember whose memories she was watching. There was only one reason why Hermione could stand here and experience this. Theodore stood peeking through a crack in the lounge door. He was still only five or six. His blue eyes held tears as he watched his mother be tortured by his father's hand. 

“Tell me Alcea, where did he hear that name,” William sneered again, his voice never wavering above the cool tone the conversation started in. 

“From me...I told him,” She panted as she tried to position herself so her husband had his back to the door. She was clearly trying to keep her husband from seeing their son. 

“I thought we agreed never to mention that name again,” He replied, his tone teetering on boredom as he held his wand and inspected it. 

“No, you and my father decided...right before you kill-”

“ _Crucio._ ” She screamed again as she dropped to the floor. Hermione could feel the tears begin to slide down her face as the man held the spell, never releasing the curse as he lowered his larger frame to his wife’s form. Finally, after what seemed like hours, but could only have been minutes, he released the spell. His mouth moved into a cruel smirk as he dropped a light kiss on her lips, Alcea too weak to push him away. “You are mine. Whatever I may have done all those years ago doesn’t matter. I married you, and you are mine Ally.”

“Don’t-you dare-call me that,” she pushed the words out between gasps of breath, “He had that-honor-not you.”

“Oh, _Ally_ don't you know he never wanted you anyway. When your father and I found him that night he told me I could have you. I would have let him live, but the Dark Lord had other plans,” William sighed as if admitting a terrible loss. William stood and walked back to where he first cast the spell.

“You were always a terrible liar-” Alcea tried to speak but the curse was spoken again, and Hermione was so absorbed in the scene before her she didn’t see the small body move. She only saw a blur as Theodore Nott threw himself between his father and mother, now standing in the way. Hermione heard herself yell no, and felt her feet move to stop it. She couldn’t change the past, however, so she had to watch as the spell connected with Theodore’s small body, taking the brunt of the curse for his mother. Nott’s high pitched screams rang out through the room as his tiny form twisted in agony on the floor. Both parents stared in shock, but William eventually recovered from his initial surprise and let his lips lift into an eerie smirk. He never let up on the curse. 

“Please, William stop...please Will,” Alcea begged as she crawled across the floor. She reached up weakly and tried to move her husband's arm. He didn’t stop.

“This will make my son stronger so he doesn’t end up weak like that Mudblood. You were too good for him anyway. Such a beauty. So pure.” Hermione could see the desperation in the woman’s eyes. Hermione noticed the woman didn’t have a wand, and watched as the determination from the beginning of the encounter came back over Alcea's pale face. As Hermione gazed on entranced the woman stood back up on weak legs and walked to the front of her husband before squaring her shoulders.

“I wasn’t so pure.” 

William faltered. The spell ended. As the boy's cries started to quiet around them as Lord Nott turned to his wife. “No.” William growled. 

“The… the _Mudblood_ had me first,” Alcea held his gaze as William stared at her in disbelief. Theo cried softly on the floor, but Hermione knew what Alcea was doing. The attention was no longer on Alcea’s son, as the small boy crawled to the corner. A house-elf Hermione didn't see enter grabbed the boy by his shirt pulling him towards the door as the boy fought to stand by his mother. Screaming calls of ‘Mummy’ echoed through the lounge. 

“You _are_ a filthy fucking whore,” Hermione saw the moment William Nott decided to kill his wife, but still she watched. She saw William’s cool face contort to one of full rage. She watched as Alcea Nott turned to her son, still fighting to run back to his mother through the small elf’s strong arms, and let a few tears escape her blue eyes and down her pale cheeks. Hermione could feel herself trembling as she watched, her own tears streaming down her face uninhibited.

“I love you,” Alcea declared loud enough to reach her son's ears through his tears and calls. Hermione saw the flash of green, and a feminine figure laying on the wood floor before she was pulled from the Pensieve, landing hard on the floor of McGonagall’s office, gasping for breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 3: In summary: We learn that Draco and Nott came to an understanding about Nott's love for Hermione. We watched through his eyes as he tried to catch glimpses of her in hallways, tried to ask her to the ball fourth year, and stood up for her second year. We also learned that he had admitting being in love with her since at least seventh year. Finally, we learned about the horrors of living with William Nott and how he was both physically and mentally abusive to both his wife and son, to the point of him actually murdering her while young Theo (5-6 yrs old) was in the room.
> 
> Also, shout out to J.R.R. Tolkien for creating another wonderful world of fantasy in the Lord of the Rings Franchise. The first installment was mentioned here, obviously I do not own it, but wanted to put this in here in case you thought I did!
> 
> A/N 4: Fixed a couple of mistakes for the sake of continuity!


	28. A Decision is Made

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione’s breath came in quick shallow succession as she fell onto the floor in the Headmistress’ office. Hot tears streamed down her face as she tried to gain her bearings, muffled cries working their way out of her throat before she could stop them. She felt like she was drowning, as she tried to pull herself from the panic that had started to build since the first memory of the Cruciatus Curse began to drag her deep into her mind where she was no longer safe. Where Dobby had never saved her, and she still had Bellatrix above her with a cursed knife. It took her a moment to realize that strong arms were wrapping around her, and another moment to acknowledge the warm feeling of a hard body pressed behind her, as she was dragged in between someones long legs on the floor. 

Still she cried.

She cried for the man who was too afraid of rejection to talk to her. She cried for the boy who was tortured by his own father for failing to outperform her. But more than anything she cried for the child who had watched his mother die, and according to his own answers in truth or dare all those months ago, still blamed himself for something he had no way to stop. 

As her mind worked to process everything she heard the soft murmurs of a voice behind her. A familiar drawl was lowered to barely a whisper as large hands worked through her hair. He didn't comment on how her tears were staining his shirt as she dug her face harder into his chest, or that she looked a mess as tear streaks and snot ran down her face. Somewhere she briefly registered that this was Draco, and she almost never allowed him to cradle her like this during one of her panics, but at that moment there was nothing she wanted than for him to hold her tight. As she sat there wrapped in his strong arms she listened to his soft tones as he repeatedly told her that it was going to be ok.

Then, he said the words that finally pulled her from her broken state. Amongst the murmurs she heard a single name. Theo. Hearing his name her breathing started to slow, with hiccups every once in a while fighting to break her again. She looked up into cool grey eyes and took one last stabilizing breath. He was telling her how Theo was ok. How he was fine and how it didn’t matter what had happened to him then because he was alright now. She gave him an incredulous look and finally spoke. 

“But he’s not..is he? Not really,” She asked in a quiet weak voice. Draco was quiet for several moments as if weighing his next words. Finally, he took a breath through his nose before tightening the hold he had around her shoulders.

“What did you see?” Draco’s eyes flicked between hers carefully as he awaited her answer. 

“Enough.” They both stared at each other. Both knew they were privy to secrets Theo had allowed them to see or know and neither wanted to be the one to break his trust. Finally, Hermione decided that she needed to speak to someone... _ anyone _ about what she had just seen. Draco seemed like the safest bet for now. 

“I saw his mother, before and after. I saw him watch me through school. I saw his fa-” She choked on the word father. Deciding that the man was unworthy of the title she began again, hatred flaring in her eyes, “I saw William Nott draw his wand on his own son. How could he do that?” Hermione almost broke once more, and Draco sensing her discomfort pulled her against his chest again. 

“William Nott is a right bastard. I was never allowed to stay at Theo’s because of his particular interest in frequency and degree of punishment.” Draco stated as he started stroking down her back, “Theo is alright. I can’t say that he is completely fine with how young he actually started to Occlumens. I don’t even think he was aware that he was practicing Occlumency until he got a little older. But, he is better now then he was. Especially since you survived.” Draco kissed her lightly on her head, his lips lingering there for a small moment before pulling back.

“Granger, I know what Pansy told you and its not fucking true.” He forced the words out through clenched teeth, his breath hot on the top of her head as he still held her. 

“How did you find out about it?” She was too tired and emotionally drained to fight her curiosity. She just stared at the opposite wall as his hands continued their easy pattern up and down her back. 

“Theo might have nicked the Weasley truth serum you had left over from game night. I flirted with Pansy long enough for him to sneak it into her drink. She told us what she did..what she said.” He finished. That explained why Malfoy was all over Pansy all those days ago, Hermione's stomach did a somersault as she remembered Malfoy and Nott wrapped up with the other Slytherins. She buried that memory deep within her mind, in the same dark place she kept memories of her parents. 

“We would never use you for your fucking name Golden Girl.” He pulled back to look at her, “I can live perfectly happy in a villa in France without ever returning to Britain. The Malfoy name is still well respected there. If whatever is going on between you two doesn't work out, I will take Theo with me.” He shrugged as he said that last part before grabbing her chin and forcing her to look at him. “But, I would much prefer if you gave my best mate a chance. Salazar knows how long he has waited, and he’s a right pain in the arse when it comes to pinning after you.” 

“Is that way you didn’t give us away at the Manor? That promise you made to him?” She asked, her eyes searching his. She had always assumed it was because he was a scared teenager. That finally seeing his classmates bound and dragged before him finally made him see that the war was real. What if she was wrong? What if the only reason that he hadn’t given them away was because of a promise made to his best friend?

Hermione didn’t want to think about what implications that would mean. It would mean that he had never wanted her to survive the war. The thought that he had cared about her and Harry even a smidge is what allowed her to become his friend in the first place. It was what allowed her to look past the years of torment and hate to see the man underneath. She hoped there was more to his decision than a promise made to a desperate boy. 

“I made a promise to him, yes. But I wouldn’t have given you away even if I hadn’t. I never wanted this.” He wiggled his left arm for emphasis, indicating the Dark Mark which was still plastered on his alabaster skin. “My promise to Nott would have reared its ugly head if my Aunt would have tried to actually...well if things had progressed further.” He seemed to be struggling for his words, and Hermione noticed a wetness creeping into his eyes as he tried to blink it away. 

“Does Theo know about what happened at Easter?” 

Malfoy barked out an uncomfortable laugh, “Yeah, he does. He was present during my trial when I had to regale the Wizengamot with all the gory details. I was really lucky they take wands before you are allowed in the room.” He shook his head as if finished. “I am glad you were already done with your testimony. I really didn’t want to have to talk about it with you in the room too.”

They stayed like that for a few more minutes. Neither saying anything just relishing in the company they had. Hermione had missed this. The weird bond that she shared with  _ her _ Slytherins was finally forming again. She took a couple more breaths before moving to stand. Malfoy held her for a second before releasing her. “Are you sure you’re ok?” He followed up behind her, his hand lightly clasped around her upper arm. “We could sit here for a few more minutes. I won’t mind, though you will have to buy me a new shirt, you’ve ruined this one.”

“No,” She whispered, ignoring his comment. She had learned through the few months they had been friends that his snarky attitude was his way of showing he cared. “I need to find him.” She wiped her eyes on her jumper sleeves before summoning his memories out of the pensive. She then gave the basin a small push and sent it back to its cabinet. “Any ideas on where to start looking?” 

Draco pursed his lips in thought, before casting a quick spell. “It’s nearly eight. He won't be in the forest this late. He’s not that stupid. If I had to put my galleons on anything, I would say he is either in your common room or in Rowena’s Study.” Draco stood for a moment before shifting on his feet and running a hand through his blond hair, “He is probably in the study...but Granger I think you should wait for at least another hour or so...he-” Malfoy hesitated. She waited knowing that he was gathering his thoughts. “He doesn’t regret giving you his memories, but he has never let anyone in. He was a right mess at dinner when he realized you were actually going to watch them.” Draco chuckled darkly, “I told him you were a Gryffindor through and through. Reckless, hard headed, and above all too brave for your own good.” She smiled as he finished. 

“Thank you for coming even when I was too stupid to admit I would need you.” She paused for only a moment before rushing back to his side and throwing her arms around his stomach. It didn't take long for him to wrap his arms around her back. He sighed and she felt his whole body relax against hers. 

“Does this mean you are not going to hex me?” He asked.

“Uh-I don't hex filthy little purebloods” She smiled as his laughs vibrated his chest. Draco was strong and his hugs were like a nice glass of warm milk. Something that you didn’t need all the time, but when you did they relaxed you in a way nothing else could. She would never understand how she had survived nineteen years without them. 

“You go on and relax in your common room for a little bit. I’ll let McGonnagall know we are done in here.” She nodded, leaving him behind as he summoned his Patronus to deliver a message to their Head Mistress. 

The walk back to her common room was quiet. Most students were either in the library studying or back in their common rooms so she didn’t run into anyone. When she got back to the shared living space her eyes were drawn to the gifts that were laid out by her door. She picked the pile up and sat them on the table next to her choosing to open the ones from Draco first. Wrapped in a beautiful emerald green with pretty silver ribbons. The first one from him was a picture of her, Theo, and him during one of the weekly game nights they had participated in before Christmas break. They were all cuddled on a couch with glasses of firewhiskey. As she watched, her and Draco laughed at something Theo said while his cheeks flushed in a pretty pink color. She smiled at the picture even though she could not remember what was said. The last box was full of sugar quills. There was enough there to last her through the end of the year with a note attached that read:  _ For someone with dentists for parents you really enjoy rotting your teeth. Because I  _ **_know_ ** _ you are going to run out of them...there is a 75 Galleon certificate at the bottom of the box for Honeydukes when you do manage to eat them all. Don’t you feel lucky to have rich friends. -Draco _

She smiled and tucked them back before digging into Nott’s gifts. The first present was a quidditch jumper in Slytherin colors. It was big...too big. Taking a guess she tucked her nose next to the fabric and breathed in deeply...it was his. She felt her lower body tighten as she relished in the familiar scent. Rubbing her thighs together a little bit to help ease the distraction she pulled off her own jumper and pulled Theo’s on. She rubbed her hands up and down the soft fabric, it was clearly well made of expensive material, before she continued. 

The next was a small snow globe with a note attached that read:  _ Think of your favorite place...then shake me _ . Hermione thought for a moment. Her favorite place was the library, so she thought about it and shook the globe. As the small snow particles swirled around the glass a small replica library formed inside. She bent close and looked and saw a mini version of herself sitting at a desk reading while a mini Theodore crumpled parchment and threw it at her head. She watched in awe as her mini self rolled her eyes and continued reading. The scene replayed itself over again until the snow stopped falling and eventually the scene vanished before her leaving the snow globe empty.

The third present she opened was a beautifully crafted silver locket. She gently pulled the piece of jewelry from the velvet that surrounded it to get a closer inspection. It was oval and it was covered in intricate carvings of a raven. She opened it up and a small folded piece of paper fell out. In Notts slightly messy scrawl there was another message: _ I noticed you didn’t have one...at least not one you wear. Every witch deserves a locket when she comes of age. The raven is for a couple of reasons...the first is that without Ravenclaw we would have never had such a wonderful year. I will always be thankful you were the Gryffindor that could access her study. The second reason you will just have to ask me about. _

She slid the locket over her head, as the chain was long enough to allow that. Then, she turned to the final gift. It was a familiar package. The same one he had shoved in his trunk in the memories she had witnessed. Slowly her fingers pulled the worn paper to reveal a plain brown medium sized box. When she opened it up her breath caught in her throat. Inside the box, tucked safely between layers of tissue paper, was a well worn copy of  _ The Fellowship of The Ring  _ By: J.R.R. Tolkien _. _ Her suspicions that this was his mother's copy were confirmed when she opened the cover and saw written in unfamiliar scratchy penmanship: 

_ Ally,  _

_ Forever will my heart be bound to yours and so I will wait for you as long as you wish. I know you are scared, and I know that there is nothing we can do to stop the storm that is coming, but I would face a thousand dark wizards for only one night with you. You mean more to me than the air I breathe and the magic that binds me to this world.  _

_ With all my love,  _

_ Caiden _

Hermione was on her feet the second she finished reading the insert. Book still in hand she ran to the library, pushing past sleepy second years who had just finished studying before she was standing just outside the wall that led to Rowena’s Study. She waited for several minutes breathing heavily and had almost given up hope when the large wooden door appeared. Taking a few steadying breaths she walked to the door and allowed it to open giving her access to the room beyond. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 2: I do not own The lord of the Rings or the Fellowship of the Ring! That belongs to J.R.R. Tolkien!


	29. Always Been Yours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> Mature Content Ahead: This fanfic was rated M for a reason. Ahead are some relatively sexually explicit scenes. Please read at your own risk

Hermione entered the room and looked around slowly before her eyes fell to a lone figure on the couch. The firelight danced across the pale skin of his face and left deep shadows under his eyes. He was laying on his side with his arms crossed to keep warm, wearing just his white oxford and dark trousers, his robes long abandoned on one of the comfy armchairs. Her Gryffindor blanket had fallen to the floor probably from constant turning. His brows were scrunched and tense showing that even in sleep he had trouble escaping his pain. She walked towards him slowly and as she got closer she heard soft cries escaping his soft pink lips as his eyes moved rapidly behind his lids. 

“Mummy…” she heard his near silent murmurings as they entered the air of the room, “Don’t hurt her.” Her breath caught as she realized which memory he was probably reliving. Desperate to pull him out of the memory before it reached its conclusion she crossed the remaining distance in a couple of large steps before gently shaking his shoulder. She thought he would be difficult to wake, but no sooner had her hand touched him than pale fingers caught her wrist. She looked up and saw cerulean eyes with tears misting in the corner. 

“Granger?” His voice was gruff with sleep, and he blinked several times as if she would disappear from where she knelt before him. When she was still there he pulled her arm and sat up in one movement so that she was pulled into a bone crushing hug as sobs racked his body. Without a second thought she wrapped her arms around his shoulders before dragging her unoccupied hand in a soothing pattern through his hair. He dug his head into her shoulder, and she felt wet tears cling to her neck as he cried, his arms wrapped around her chest pulling her closer until the only space between them was the cotton of their clothes. His arms long enough that his hands were splayed on either side of her rib cage where his fingers clung to her.

They stayed like that for several minutes, Nott trying to pull himself together and Hermione holding him together while he couldn't. Finally, he released her and rubbed his face with his hands before leaning back against the cushion. She summoned him a small glass of water before placing her wand down on the end table next to the couch.“Sorry,” he started his eyes still closed, “I didn’t mean too...it takes me a second to replace the walls after I wake up. Did you need-” He stopped the sentence short when he opened his eyes and looked at her. She remembered suddenly that she was wearing his jumper...and the locket...and still had his mother's book tucked safely in one hand. He blinked a couple of times before speaking slowly again in his usual cool and collected voice, “Did you like your presents?”

“I can’t accept this,” She said gently, holding out his worn copy of the book. 

He stared at it for several moments before reaching a hand out as if he was going to take it. At the last second he pushed the book, still wrapped in her hand, to her chest. 

“I am giving it to you.” He whispered. 

“And I cannot accept it.”

“It’s already been yours for so long.” She got the impression that they were not talking about the book anymore. 

“This...it was your mothers.” She insisted trying to push her hand and the book away from her chest. He held it there tightly, nodding slowly even though it wasn’t a question. She saw a couple walls pull into place behind his eyes before he took another shuddering breath. They sat like that for a long time. Him staring at her. Her staring at him, as she knelt before him in front of the couch. When he spoke again it was in a soft whispered voice, he dropped his hand away from hers when he was sure she wouldn’t push it back. 

“She told me to give it to the person I loved most in the world. Do you know what I told her?” He chuckled watching Hermione closely for a reaction. She knew he was asking if this was a memory she had seen, so she shook her head. “I told her that I loved  _ her  _ the most.” He glanced away from Hermione for a second, a single tear escaping as he turned back to face her again, “She smiled at me when I said that and told me that there would be someone...someday...that I would love more. I told her she was barmy.” He hesitated for a moment before taking another deep breath, “She was right.” He looked into Hermione's eyes then. His eyes lightened right before hers into the beautiful forget-me-not. 

He reached across the distance between them, leaning forward slightly, to the locket and fingered it. Keeping his eyes on Hermione he rubbed his thumb over the polished piece of metal. “I chose a raven because I will always be in debt to Ravenclaw. She is the person who built this room, and without this room you wouldn’t have ever noticed me.” He laughed weakly before releasing a deep breath, “But also because,” He hesitated again, breathing in through his nose as he prepared himself to open to her once again, “ _ you _ are my happy memory Hermione. When I cast my Patronus, I think of you.” 

He leaned forward slowly before pushing a wayward curl behind her ear, and then he was kissing her. His hands on either side of her face, reminiscent of their first kiss. His mouth was soft and slow, giving her plenty of time to pull away if that is what she wanted. When she didn’t, his tongue began sweeping across her lips begging for entrance and she opened up to him letting his tongue touch hers. She forgot how good he tasted, spearmint mixed with Theo, and let out a low moan. She was sick of pretending. He knew how she felt. There was no hiding it once her Patronus was conjured. So, she allowed herself to feel for him again. She opened the wall she had built around her heart in order to survive the past month without him, and pushed into him with enough force to cause him to lean back. He pulled her up to his lap and she immediately straddled him. She had been slightly aroused since she pulled that first breath in from his jumper and while his nightmare had dumped ice water on her a second ago, the heat was back and with more force than she had ever felt.

She grabbed a handful of his dark hair, as his hands began to trail up her shirt, his fingers ghosting on the flesh that was pulled tight on her ribs, “You haven’t been eating enough,” He commented as he worked his way down her neck sucking on a spot that made her gasp. He nibbled on her as her slow moans became more frequent. She could practically feel the smug smile that was plastered on his lips. 

“Not now, Theo,” She moaned out as she began to push her hips against him. She was seeking a friction that she didn’t know a lot about. She had never gotten to the edge so many spoke about by herself...or with a partner. Studying to maintain being the brightest witch, and running from dark wizards did take a lot of time, so she did not have as much time to explore herself. She also had never had a partner to help her with it either. She was inexperienced to say the least. But, she had to be doing something right because with every wiggle of her hips she felt him grow harder beneath her. 

“Fuck,” He groaned, “Say it again.”

“Theo…” She called again as her skirt rode up so the only thing separating her from the pleasure was her knickers which she was sure were drenched, and his trousers which were pulled tight against him. He moaned again at the sound of his given name on her lips. His fingers hesitated just below the bra. As his fingers paused just on the underside of her swollen flesh it occurred to her that every time they had gotten this far she had stopped him. She smiled to herself as she remembered that he wasn’t a Gryffindor. He wasn’t brave enough to venture forth when every time previously he had been stopped. 

But she was. 

She grabbed the hem of her... _ his _ ...jumper and flung it off her body. He pulled back immediately and let his eyes wander to her heaving chest. His fingers began to creep behind her back and he hesitated at the clasp. When she didn't stop him he undid it with one confident move of his hand. He had experience. Then, his mouth was on hers again and she was rocking back and forth in a dance of pure instinct. His large hands reached into her hair and pulled her closer to his mouth, trying to devour her as her fingers clumsily tried to undo the buttons of his shirt. 

He stiffened. 

“Granger…”He wrapped his hands around her wrists to stop her. 

“I’ve seen them.” She blurted quickly, never stopping their kiss. She put her fingers on the inside of the shirt between the seams. Her breath was coming in small gasps as she slowed her hips. His hands wrapped a little tighter around her wrists. Finally, she pulled back and looked into his beautiful eyes, “But I won't do this if you still need time.” His gaze bounced between her eyes, trying to detect the lie that wasn’t there, “However, I will be honest ...I want to see you... _ all  _ of you.” He stared at her for a moment longer before nodding his head and capturing her lips again. 

His lips were taking no prisoners this time, they were rough and demanding and his fingers dropped from her hands to dig into her hips. He pushed her harder into him, and lifted his hips to reach hers as she began to push down on him again. She whimpered at the contact, and felt her cheeks flush in embarrassment at the sounds he was conjuring from her. She pulled hard on the seams of his shirt, enjoying the plinking sound as buttons ricocheted off the walls. She quickly divested him of his shirt and ran her hands down his chest, fingers sliding down each scar she felt. Each piece of puckered flesh that his father had given him. Each inch of tissue that was a map of the pain he had suffered, and each raised section that had told him for years he wouldn’t be good enough. She caressed him, willing him to understand that he had been good enough. He would  _ always _ be good enough. 

Emboldened by her, Theo moved one hand from her hip and drew it back up her ribs until he was just under her breast. His kisses began to work his way down her collar bone as his hand crept up her side, the other arm now wrapped around her waist to keep her tight against him as she rocked her hips. Her head began to fall back on its own volition. She could feel something building...she had never felt it this close before. His thumb finally grazed her nipple, and as soon as his calloused flesh touched her rose colored peak she saw stars. Her moans were so loud she was sure that all of Scotland could hear so she tried to stifle them.

“No,” She heard Theo growl as he nipped at her ear, “Let me hear you,” and so she did. She let him hear how he made her voice quake in pleasure as she rocked against him. Her high pitched moans echoed off the stone walls as he held her together while she fell apart in his arms. When she finally came down and made to look at him she was not surprised to see him staring, but it still made her blush. She spoke trying to clear the silence.

“I didn’t know that...If I had known…” She blushed again, “I can't believe I never…” Theo stared at her as she tried to articulate her thoughts. Then, as if a light went off, his eyes opened wide in surprise and a very cute pink tinged his cheeks and ears. 

“You’ve never…” She shook her head, “Not even with yourself?” She shook her head again. “Oh Granger…” He paused for a moment before his cocky grin grew on his face and that small dimple formed in the corner, “Would you like to again?” 

Her heart sped up. “Don’t you need to…” She motioned to his waist where she could still feel him hard and throbbing digging into her center. 

“No I don't  _ need _ to. I would  _ like  _ to, but I will never  _ need  _ to.” He maintained eye contact as he explained that. Making sure there was no room for misunderstanding. 

“I’ve read that some women can have multiple.”She whispered shyly, her cheeks flushing a little. “What if I can’t?” 

“There is only one way to find out, but if you want to be done I understand.” He looked at her for a moment before continuing, “I hope this is something we could learn together though.” He looked so vulnerable for a moment. His shields had been lowered, and she saw him struggling to keep it that way. 

“Do you want to? Keep going I mean,” Hermione began to nibble her lip. She suddenly felt embarrassed as she realized they were both still shirtless. She ducked her head a little before wrapping her arms tightly around his neck and pulling herself closer until she could feel her soft breasts push against his hard chest. The sensation made her release a small and breathy gasp.

He groaned and she felt him twitch under her, she looked down between them in surprise as he chuckled. “Granger, of course I do. But this is your choice. It always has been. I will wait for you as long-.” She was on him again then. Attacking his lips with a new fervor. She was going to do this. She was going to give herself to him, because there was no one in this world that would ever come close to making her feel as safe and welcome as he did. His fingers grazed her nipples again and the heat pooled between her thighs. She moaned, and she could feel the smile return to his lips. She attached herself to his neck and on instinct began to bite and lightly suck. 

“Fuck Granger, please” She moaned aloud at the sound of his begging as she began to mark him, “I am yours,” He murmured huskily as she continued. She moved down his neck as her hips began to move again. In one swift movement he had her laying on the couch. He was propped up on one arm supporting his weight above her, as he moved his forehead to hers and propped their heads together with gentle pressure. His breath fanned across her cheeks as his hand began to move down her stomach.

“I have always been yours,” His voice remained low, as he stared at her reverently. His breath was labored, and she could smell the sweet spearmint as his hand edged closer to her waist. His fingers moved down past her skirt and began to drag gently up her thigh, causing goosebumps to erupt again across her pale skin. He made it to the edge of her pale blue knickers, her breath hitched and his hand stayed still waiting for the ok. She gave him a small nod, keeping their foreheads together. He had just moved past the waistband of her panties, and was almost to the spot she knew would make her squirm, when the door to Ravenclaw’s Study opened. 


	30. Chivalry Ruins the Mood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to the wonderful J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Theodore was up and off of the couch faster than Hermione could register the door had moved. He had a blanket thrown over her chest, and advanced to the door to block whoever was entering from seeing the nearly naked witch as she scrambled to grab her... _ his _ jumper and throw it on. “Theo, have you seen Hermione?” she heard the worried drawl of Draco as she quickly corrected her clothes and hair, “Wait...where’s your shirt?” She heard the worry in Draco’s voice slowly leak into confusion. 

“Malfoy you have the worst bloody timing in all of Britain I fucking swear,” Theo growled before casting a quick glance over his shoulder. He was still preventing Malfoy from coming into the room, but once he saw that Hermione was dressed he stepped aside. Hermione watched as Draco entered the room, his eyes flicking to hers, taking in her haggard appearance and messy hair before landing on the mark on Theo’s neck. She watched as both of his pale eyebrows raised, realization slowly dawning on him. The confusion was quickly replaced with a knowing smirk. 

“Oh, there’s my favorite witch.” Draco crowed, his smirk spreading into a genuine smile. 

“Yes, here she is, you can leave now.” Theo rolled his eyes before crossing the room picking up the worn copy of  _ The Fellowship of the Ring _ from where it had been abandoned on the floor. Hermione instantly felt guilty for leaving it there, but Theodore gave her a smile as he set it down on the end table positioned near the couch, next to her wand. The smile alone was enough to make a blush rush to her cheeks. His eyes were now back to their typical royal blue as he crossed his arms against his bare chest. 

“Afraid I can't leave quite yet,” Draco stated as he perched himself in a chair, picking at invisible dirt on his sleeve before settling back, “I have some rather interesting information that I thought the two Heads of House should know.” Theo’s shoulders stiffened and he looked back at the blond expectantly. 

“And?” Theo prompted before leaning up against the couch.

“Weasley is outside your common room waiting for you to come back,” his grey eyes were alight with amusement. 

“Why?” Hermione stared at him expectantly as the blond raised a single eyebrow before scoffing. 

“Like I bloody asked. I went to the dorm to see if you found him,” Draco motioning to Theo, “and to make sure you were alright. I saw the Weasel sitting outside the portrait of Merlin's Tower, and decided to check the study to see if you were here, which you were. Although, I didn't expect to find the Golden Girl in such a compromising position,” He paused before smirking again, “Nice jumper Granger,” Hermione blushed as she self consciously fingered the hem of the jumper. 

“It was a Christmas gift,” She gave a small smile as pink tinged her cheeks. 

“I know it was, you should have heard him fussing. He was so worried you would be offended and wouldn’t wear it. Guess he was wrong.”

“Yeah he was,”

“Well, he has been blind to your attraction to him for awhile now.” 

“I know.”

“ _ HE  _ is still in the room with you two.” Theo huffed. 

“Yes, you are.” Draco was smiling again now. “Speaking of which, why are you two snogging in here. You have a private room.”

“I wasn’t exactly concerned with being proper.” Theo shrugged before casting a glance at Hermione, “The girl of my dreams kissed me after delving into the darkness of my mind, but seeing how she reacted I am going to assume she didn’t see anything too terrible.” Theo continued as he grabbed his shirt off the floor. After he cast a quick  _ Reparo _ on the buttons he put it on. When he had finished buttoning and no one had spoken he looked up to his two friends. Their eyes were down cast. “Hermione-”

Hermione shook her head. She couldn't look at him right now, especially with how his voice sounded. “Draco-” Theo choked on the word. He was looking quickly between his best mate and her, his eyes scrunching in confusion, before horror crossed his face.“What...why did you go looking for Hermione?” His question was directed at Draco, who was now staring at the fire. 

Theo’s memories began to flood her mind and she shook her head again trying to force them away as the tears started coming. Not for the first time in her life Hermione wished she had mastered Occlumency. She wanted nothing more than to compartmentalize like Theo could. Like Draco could. But she couldn’t, and now she was watching the same two memories on repeat as the boy she loved was tortured by his father. She tried to stop the emotion, she tried to force control over herself as she had no right to feel affected by these memories when the boy who had experienced them could go day to day without breaking down. But no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t control the broken sob that escaped her throat. Draco was off the chair in a second and had his arms wrapped around her as Theo watched on, panic dawning on his pale face. 

“What did she see?” The sound was forced between clenched teeth. 

“I don't th-”

“Dammit Draco fucking tell me,” 

Draco shook his head and looked at Theo pointedly. “She needs  _ you  _ right now, not me you bloody git.” That seemed to shake Theo out of his state of mind, as he crossed the couch to the other side of Hermione and wrapped her in a hug. Hermione immediately turned her face into his shirt, burying her nose into his scent and steadying her breathing.

“I saw you watching me in fourth year, that was a cute little pep talk.” She laughed around her thick throat as she felt his arms tighten. She felt Draco remove his hands from around her shoulders as he gave her a small kiss on the head before he stood.

“Take care of her Nott,” Draco murmured, “Take care of her, and don't make me regret helping you get her.” Draco looked back at her, as she looked at him. Grey meeting brown in a silent understanding. No matter what happened he would be there for her and she would be there for him. That’s what friends did...and he was her friend. She gave him a minuscule nod, her head still pushed up against Theo’s chest. Draco nodded back, releasing a heavy sigh, and leaving the study. 

“What else,” Theo prompted. 

“You begged Draco to help me during the war.” She started, “You punched Draco for calling me a mud-,” She felt him release a small chuckle. The rumbling in his chest grounding her before she took a deep breath and continued, “I saw your mum...and I saw that sperm donor you call a father.” He stiffened and waited, “It-Theo I am so sorry.” She started to cry again. 

“Don't,” His voice was thick, “you never have to be sorry for what happened to me. It was never your fault. If anything you were the one thing that kept me ok. Coming to school and seeing you.” He rubbed a hand down her back. “I knew I wanted to have a  _ chance _ to be with you, at least as your friend, from the moment I saw you answer the first questions Snape asked us in potions. You were so fucking brilliant. When I found out you were muggle-born I knew that my father would never allow it. But now...thanks to you and Potter I have that chance. I am never going to give it up!” He held her tighter and kissed her on her head, working down her hair line and slowly onto her eyes. Laying gentle kisses against her lids and down the tear tracks on her face. Each kiss was like a balm to her battered soul. She had been on the verge of a breakdown since the memories, but these kisses were like an anchor. Holding her steady amongst the storm. 

“You know…” she smirked as he reached her cheeks, “My favorite color is not lavender.” He froze and pulled back. He looked at her bemused, with a small grin on his face. 

“Oh?” There was a slight laugh to his voice. 

“It...it changed recently.” 

“How recently?”

“Do you remember when you found me in the alcove?”

“How could I forget, that was the first time you ever let me hold you.” He brought a hand up and started running fingers gently through her hair as she pulled back to look at him more fully.

“Did you know your eyes change color with your mood?” He shook his head slowly, that damn dimple on his cheek, “They do, and I’ve seen every shade they can exhibit make an appearance in a number of different scenarios...besides one.” She moved to sit on her knees, grabbing his face in her small hands, feeling the stubble across his chin as she held him staring at her. Chocolate meeting royal blue...not quite her goal. She lent forward, hands pushing his face to the side as her breath grazed his ear. “Do you want to know,” hand sliding down his chest, “Are you curious?” Hand dipping to his trousers, catching on the belt, “Which shade they are now?” She looked up. She was right...Royal had lightened to her new favorite color, forget-me-not blue. The color that only belonged to her. The color that couldn’t be brought out by anything other than time spent entwined with her. 

He groaned. She took that as permission to keep going. So she did. She kissed his neck again, giving him a matching mark. Twin red stains on perfectly pale skin marking him as hers on either side of his strong neck. She would be damned if she ever let him go again. She needed him as much as he wanted her. She needed the safety that she couldn’t get anywhere but in his arms. So, in his arms, her fingers traced his belt; pulling on the leather until she felt the pop of the silver metal escaping its prison. 

“Granger,” He groaned again. “Please, if you keep going I-” He grabbed her hand stilling it just as she started on the button on his trousers. He took a couple of deep breaths, but she could still see him, strained against his trousers. “You are...inexperienced, yeah?” She blinked a couple of times, pulling her head back in shock at the bluntness of his question. 

“I-” She could feel the hot blush creep up her neck. He nodded as if that was answer enough. 

“Granger, I want you. More than I want the air I breathe...More than all the galleons in my vault, more than-” His throat caught, “more than the magic that runs through my veins and ties me to this world. But-” He looked at her until she met his eyes. There were walls up in them, clearly trying to snatch whatever control he could through his practiced precision of Occlumency, “I don’t want you to ever regret what you do with me. Let’s take things slow ok?” When she didn’t answer he cupped her cheek kissing her lightly on the lips. It was chaste and soft when he pulled back he had his lip tucked in his teeth again, “Go with me to Hogsmeade this weekend?” Her breath caught in her throat and she released it with a sharp gasp. Did he just ask her on a date?

“Um-Yes...of course, Godric yes!” She kissed him again. He laughed through her kisses holding her by her waist as she tried to climb into his lap again. 

“Salazar Granger,” He laughed gently, pushing her gently back so she was seated slightly away from him, “I would love to do nothing more than sit in this room with you and never leave. Unfortunately, we have a weasel problem that needs dealt with at home.” He lifted her until she was standing before grabbing his cloak and her blanket. “If you would do the honors, love.” He motioned to the door. She nodded before opening the door, and walking them into their common room. Their home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 2: A/N 2: I do not own The Fellowship of the Ring. That belongs to our Lord of all fantasy. Mr. J.R.R. Tolkien!


	31. No More Hiding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING: This chapter contains mentions of PTSD and descriptions of Flashbacks. Please read ahead at your own risk.

Theo lifted his wand and banished Hermione’s blanket and his cloak to his room, the door separating it from the common room opening to allow the fabric to slip in before closing quietly behind it. He then shot two fireballs towards the fireplace allowing it to erupt to life before standing awkwardly next to Hermione. He reached out slowly and took her hand, gently caressing the back of her hand with his thumb in slow circles. “I’ll be in my room while you talk to Ron. I-...” He hesitated, “I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” She nodded, giving him a small nervous smile. He kissed her on the forehead before walking quietly back to his room, closing the door lightly behind him. Taking his comfort and warmth and locking it behind an oaken barrier. 

She took a slow breath before opening the portrait, Ron walked in quickly without waiting to be invited inside. He just flashed her a warm grin and strode in as if he had often come to her common room, when in reality he hadn’t been there by himself all year. Hermione furrowed her brow before closing the door behind him. Ron had already thrown himself down on Theo’s love seat when Hermione entered the common room. The look of his red hair, where black waves should have been caused her stomach to roll. Taking a deep breath she entered the room, crossing the distance to stand in front of him. 

“How did you get in here ‘Mione, I have been outside for an hour.” She forgot that she would have to explain about Rowena’s Study. Of course Ron wouldn’t understand how she had entered the room without coming through the front entryway. 

Thinking quickly Hermione flipped her hair over her shoulder and perched herself on the armrest of the chair Draco usually claimed, “I’ve been here the whole time. I had cast some silencing charms on my room so I could take a nap. I was just about to head to the library, actually,” Ron nodded, accepting her answer without further questions. They stared at each other for several minutes, the silence in the room becoming unbearable when finally Ronald began to speak. 

“So, I was wondering-” He started, rubbing a hand through his hair, “Sunday is Valentine’s, would you like to go with me? To Hogsmeade I mean.” Hermione stared at Ron and blinked a couple of times. Did he just...after they...was he…

“Are you kidding me?” She blurted, shaking her head trying to clear the confusion clouding her mind. He had never apologized from the night in the Great Hall, in fact he had been actively avoiding her for weeks now. What was going through his head for him to expect her to say yes to a date with him? “Are you joking?” He stared at her, she stared at him.

“I thought that since you saw I was right about _them_ , you would see that it has always been you and me.” He mumbled quietly, his eyes locked on hers for several minutes before he puffed out his cheeks and released a long breath. 

Then his gaze drifted down. 

She felt subconscious wiggling under his stare. It was only after his puzzled face contorted to one of rage that she realized what he was staring at. Theo’s jumper. His _Slytherin_ jumper. 

“Oh, I see how it is.” He spat, “So you’re a fucking masochist then?” He stood quickly, on pure instinct her hand reached for her wand, but it wasn't there. It was on the end table with Theo’s book back in Rowena’s Study. Her heart started pounding, “Hermione, why are you choosing them over me?” 

“I’m not!” She yelled back while standing up, “I am choosing myself! I have chosen you and Harry over every _single_ thing in my life. I have fought, and nearly died for you. Both of you. Can’t you see that I am choosing my own happiness for once.”

“Happiness? With them? I could make you happy!” He advanced on her again, subconsciously she began slowly backing away. It wasn’t that she was scared of Ron. Everyone knew she could best him in a duel, and she really didn’t think he would ever hurt her, but he had a temper and she had never seen him this mad. When she finally realized she was moving she felt it was better to give him space, so she kept backing up until she couldn’t any more. Until the stone of the castle wall dug into her shoulders, and still he advanced as if he didn’t realize what he was doing. “I could! But you just won’t give me a chance.”

“I waited months for you to do something... _anything_. But you didn’t. I moved on. Maybe you should too.”

“I don’t want to move on,” He placed his hands on either side of her face, bracing himself against the stones. He was trapping her against the wall. 

Trapped.

Beneath a boggart in a cave. Only it's not a boggart because this had actually happened to her. Bellatrix was real, what she had done was real. Pinned below a crazy witch wielding a cursed knife. 

Trapped.

As the knife digs into her flesh, breath hot and foul against her already filthy skin. 

Trapped. 

Hermione’s breath was coming faster now. This was Ron though. She shouldn’t fear Ron. But she had been teetering on a panic attack for hours now, since the first memory she had seen where the torture curse had been spoken, and the emotional crisis finally crashed over her like a tsunami. In her mind her horrible past met her not so perfect present and it wasn’t Ron anymore as the cackle of a deranged witch replaced the sound of the fire and Ron's labored breathing. She was under Bellatrix, and she was trapped. 

“Hermione?” Rons concerned voice called, sounding far away. Her back sliding down stone walls leaving behind scratches and welts where it caught her skin as the jumper rode up. Her knees folded beneath her as she leaned forward on her palms. On hands and knees she gasped for breath, as her hair fell into her face. “Hermione!” His voice was full of fear, not unlike it was that afternoon almost a year ago. Her heart was beating so hard it reminded her of a bomb going off a million times in a second. Another sharp breath, and black spots are now dotting her eyes. She needed her protector and her guardian. She needed Nott. She needed…

“Back the fuck up Weasley,” Parchment, Spearmint, something sweet...Theo. “Hey there love. I thought I told you I would see you in the morning. You are making a liar out of me,” Strong arms folding across her back as heat began tying her back to the ground, lips pressed to the dark curls of her hair. Hermione’s breathing slowed down to near normal levels as she lay clinging to Theo like a small child clung to a parent after a nightmare. 

She knew in her mind that this boy was Theo, but she couldn’t quite make the connection between finding comfort in Theodore Nott’s arms and the end of the war. So, trapped inside her own mind she clung to him like a barnacle trying to find safety in his warmth. Her mind was still drawn back to the drawing room floor, and she was still convinced Bellatrix was going to hurt her yet again, but she found comfort in the strong embrace that smelled like parchment as she waited for the next round of the Cruciatus. 

“What is wrong with her?” She could hear Ron asking from somewhere in the room. “I'm sending a Patronus to Harry,” Hermione felt Theo’s head nod, as confusion washed over her. How was Ron out of the basement? What was a Patronus going to do? Was he going to be hurt next? She tried to look up at Ron, to tell him to take Harry and run before Bellatrix came back. All she could see was Theo’s chest, wrapped in a tight grey cotton vest. 

“They need to run,” She murmured into his chest. 

“That’s a good idea, Weasley,” His voice rumbled in his chest. “I think we need to have a talk with you two.” She could hear Theo and Ron both cast the incantation. Two Patronus’ off to find two former enemies so that they can discuss the only thing tying them together. Her. 

* * *

When Hermione heard the portrait door open several minutes later she was still clinging to Theo. He had tried to get her to let go of him, and was getting increasingly more concerned as she refused. The concern finally came to a head when Malfoy and Harry came through the door. Hermione looked up at the sound, and once she saw Malfoy she released a tiny whimper. Malfoy stopped in his tracks and peered back at her, his brows scrunched in confusion and grey eyes staring at her in concern. “Please...please make it stop,” Hermione grabbed her forearm and pinned it between her chest and Theo’s as he held her tighter. “Please don't let her hurt me again.” Malfoy’s face warped into a twisted visage of pain as he stared down at her. He crept closer, hands open at his sides for her to see he was unarmed. He crouched on the floor next to her and Theo.

“Hermione, I would never let anyone hurt you ever again,” His voice was low as he stared at her. She stared back, wanting to trust him but not remembering why. 

“Ron, what is going on?” Harry asked from his new position next to Malfoy. 

“Harry,” Hermione looked at him, confusion knitted across her features, “You have to run before she comes back.” Hermione pleaded. “Take Ron and go...I can-” She looked at Malfoy and then slowly up at Theodore...just now _really_ seeing both of them and remembering why they were there. Remembering that she was safe. That with these four boys she should always be safe. 

The tears flowed freely then, she buried her face into Theo’s cotton shirt as he buried his nose in her hair. “Potter,” Draco...not _Malfoy_...drawled, “Can you get her a cup of tea. Earl Grey with a bit of honey?” It was phrased like a question, but came out as an order. To everyone's surprise Harry followed it. “Theo,” Draco’s voice was softer now, but no less commanding, “get her off the floor, yeah?” Theo nodded, and carefully picked Hermione up in his arms, carrying her to the loveseat. He sat with his back up against an armrest and deposited her between his legs. One of which was positioned, bent at the knee, so his foot could rest on the floor. 

“Here,” Hermione peered up and graciously accepted the steaming cup Harry offered. She felt Theo’s magic caress her hand as it found its way to her tea cup. The heat from the tea cooled from the wandless, wordless cooling charm he had cast. Only slightly, just enough so she could take a sip without burning her mouth. She gave Theo a watery smile as she took a deep calming drink. “Better?” Harry asked as he sat on the coffee table in front of her and Theo. 

“I think so,” Hermione sighed. 

“Good, now someone better explain to me what the fuck happened.” His voice was still soft with concern, but there was now an edge that she was familiar with. She knew there would be no waving off this incident like she had the others. He was now aware there was something wrong, and wouldn’t rest until whatever it was was solved. She had heard this tone for the first time when he was convinced Snape was going to steal the Philosopher’s Stone, and for the last time when he told her that he was going into the Forbidden Forest alone to face Voldemort. She took a deep breath. 

“I have been struggling to...separate myself from the...from what happened to us.” She said as she clung to her hot cup, allowing the warmth to help steady her shaky hands. 

“What do you mean,” Ron asked as he perched himself on the chair that Hermione usually claimed. 

“I- Theo…” She looked at him pleadingly. He nodded just once, before holding onto her hips, and pulling her impossibly closer. 

“She has panic attacks, she has severe anxiety to the point of curbing her appetite, and apparently...flashbacks can be triggered. She needs a mind healer, or a muggle therapist. I saw both after my father was incarcerated and think it would do her some good.” He calmly advised. Hermione peered at Theo and saw that he had begun Occluding. She reached a hand up and touched his face until his eyes dropped from Harry and back to her. 

“Please, don’t…” She begged.

“I have to.” Theo replied simply, “I have to right now, I will drop them after. I promise.”

“Hermione needed you two,” Draco’s voice was hard. He rarely ever used her given name, but had used it twice since entering the portrait and once in Rowena’s Study. Hermione realized suddenly that he only used it when he was scared for her, she looked up and saw him standing with his back to her, “She needed you and all you were concerned about was the Weaslette’s arse, and convincing the school _we_ were out to get her.” 

“Draco-” Her voice caught, the blond’s back stiffened. He turned to look at her, grey eyes smoldering with an intensity that she had never seen. “Please come sit by me.” His eyes bounced between hers before nodding once. Theo drew the leg that was spread out on the couch up so it was bent at the knee and was resting on Hermione’s hip, making room for Draco. “You know I am alright don't you?” She asked when he sat down next to her. 

“You...you thought I would let her-” Draco’s voice was choked as he turned his head away from her and stared at a spot on the wall. 

“No! No I don’t. I am sorry,”

“Don’t apologize,” Theo demanded, “Malfoy, she couldn’t control what was happening. Don't be such a prat, you know she’s forgiven you.” Draco sucked in a sharp breath through his nose twice before nodding his head and reaching for her hand. She held it, knowing he needed confirmation that she didn’t blame him. 

“What does all this have to do with you two?” Ron asked after a couple of moments of silence. He wasn’t angry anymore, his voice was tinged with curiosity as he watched the three of them. 

“They helped me.” Hermione looked up at Ron, locking eyes with him. “They noticed something was wrong and they helped.” Ron looked from Draco to Theo and then back at Hermione. Guilt flashed over the faces of her two oldest friends. 

“We could have helped,” Ron mumbled. 

“No...not without me feeling guilty for telling you something was wrong.” She whispered looking down in shame. “How could I explain to you that I was having trouble when you had lost Fr-” her throat tightened around the words, “Fred. How could I validate my own feelings to you when you had suffered so much more-”

“Hermione for being the smart one you can sometimes be really thick,” Harry scoffed, standing up suddenly and running his hands through his already tousled hair, “You lost Fred too. You guys were close ever since D.A. Don't think I didn’t notice. Do I know exactly what was going on, no. But I wasn’t too thick to notice the way you turned red every time he came in the room.” She blushed a little, almost proving his point, “You also lost your mother, and your father, and me for a second. You were tortured and beaten within an inch of your life, and you starved for months so Ron and I could have the most food. I- I should have noticed you weren’t ok,” He started tearing up then as he stared at her, green eyes shining and a look of failure crossing his face. 

“I was fine-”

“No you weren’t” Ron interrupted, standing up too, “‘Mione, we are your best friends. You could have come to us at any time and we would have told you that what you were feeling was fine, that it was normal. You don’t think George goes to a mind healer? Or mum? We have all been trying to help each other. We should have known!” 

Harry walked towards her until he was touching her face holding it in both of his soft hands, “We love you. I can’t believe you didn’t tell us sooner...I can't believe you didn’t tell _me_ sooner.” He pulled her into one of his famous hugs. The kind of hugs that told you no matter what was coming you would be safe. Ron was beside him in an instant wrapping his arms around her too. “Tomorrow you are going to Madam Pomfrey’s, and we are going to get you help.” She gave a shuddering breath and a small nod. A weight she didn’t know she had been carrying lifted off of her and the darkness that she carried deep in her soul lightened just a little. 

“Nott,” Hermione looked up at Ron's voice, “I...I am sorry.” He was rubbing the back of his red hair, “Thank you for helping her.” Nott gave him a small nod, his face serious. 

“Anytime,”

“Likewise Weasley,” Draco grit out, nodding along with Theodore. 

“I still don't like you,” Ron declared seriously. 

“You don’t have too, as long as you know we are here for her whether you like us or not.” Draco replied, giving a small shrug. 

They stayed sitting on the couch and individual chairs long into the night. Harry and Ron eventually began chatting rather amicably with the Slytherins about school. Eventually, that led to childhood jokes and funny tales. Hermione watched it all in fascination. Who would have thought, the only thing she needed to do to bring these two parts of her life together was to have a mental breakdown. She smiled a little as Harry told Draco about the time he made his aunt swell like a balloon. Draco was laughing hard, while Theo slowly wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer. 

“Well,” Harry said standing and stretching, “We have to get back to Gryffindor tower. We will be back here early to take you to the Hospital Wing.” He leaned down and kissed her on the head. 

“Hermione,” Ron gave her a small nod towards the door, and she followed him out. Harry walked down the hall to give them some privacy. “Is this why...why you didn’t want to be with me?” He looked resigned, like he already knew the truth. There was still a small light of hope behind his cornflower eyes, and she cracked a little at having to be the one to snuff it out.

“No Ron,” she said quietly. 

He nodded, “I thought not, well…” He blew some air out of his mouth, “This is not something I want you to worry about ok?” She gave him a small smile, “I’ll be alright, I just can’t believe you...you chose a snake didn’t you?” The malice that normally colored his voice in reference to the Slytherins was absent. She could see the small weak grin on his face. 

“Yes and no. I chose Theodore Nott, but he is so much more than just a Slytherin. Spend time with him and you will find that out too.” He put his hand on her shoulder and gave it a small squeeze, before blowing out a breath and rubbing the back of his red hair.

“I still don’t think he deserves you.” 

“That’s where you are wrong. I don’t deserve him.” She clarified, pulling Ron into a tight hug. They were not back to normal completely, but she knew they would be. Ron would always be Ron. Quick to anger, and one to hold grudges for a while but he always came back to his friends. It just took him a little longer this time than all the others. 


	32. Morning Lessons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> Mature Content Ahead: This fanfic was rated M for a reason. Ahead are some sexually explicit scenes. Please read at your own risk

Hermione went back through the portrait alone to find Draco spreading out a blanket on the loveseat before getting comfortable. Nott was positioned by the door to his room, leaning up against the frame, his arms crossed and a look of concern lining his face. 

“What are you doing?”

“If you think I'm leaving you alone after the day you’ve had I am going to have to highly suggest you cut your hair, as it would clearly be sucking up your brain cells and destroying your mind.” Draco commented, flippantly as he took his shirt off. 

“Merlin, warn a witch you pasty git. I think I’ve been blinded,” Hermione laughed as she walked to the couch, covering her eyes from the glare off of Draco’s skin. “I meant why are you making up the couch.” 

“Where else would he sleep?” Theo asked, his brow scrunched as he fought a grin at Hermione’s earlier crack at his friend's pale complexion. 

“My bed.” Both boy’s heads shot up to look at her shock littering their faces. “Godric, no! I won't be there.” She walked right past Theo into his room shouting, “The password is wrackspurts,” over her shoulder as she went. 

Theo had walked in behind her, standing just by the door. “Close it,” She demanded. He listened and closed the door slowly, Hermione seeing Draco’s amused face right before the edge of the door found its way home into the frame. “Lock it.” He listened again, waving his hand in front of the door, she heard a slight click. “Silence it.” His face was stone still as he grabbed his wand, and cast a very simple silencing charm. “Ok…” Hermione released a shaky breath, “Now, hold me Theodore before I fall.” He was across the room in less than a second, his arms wrapped tightly around her, as she fought back the emotional exhaustion. “I'm sorry,” He rubbed his hands in soothing circles, transferring miniscule amounts of comforting heat into her skin, as she turned her cheek to rest it on his chest. 

“Oh, for Salazar’s sake Granger, please stop apologizing.” He held her tighter as he kissed her head several times. “You don’t have to stay in here,” He whispered, pulling back to look her in the face. 

“Will you stop being so noble. I  _ want _ to stay here. There is nowhere on this blasted rock of a planet that I feel safer than in your arms.” Hermione rolled her eyes, before making eye contact with him. She spoke more quietly, softer, even sounding perhaps a little fearful, “Don’t make me leave, please.” 

“Never.” He kissed her on the forehead, before pulling back, “Let me just find you something to wear, yeah? Might be difficult to sleep in your uniform, even if that jumper is super comfortable, pajamas are still the way to go,” He rummaged around in his closet before pulling an oversized Puddlemere United long sleeve shirt. “I-I have some drawstring sweats that might fit too,” He said nervously, as he moved to his chest of drawers. 

“No, this will work just fine, Nott. Can you um-” Hermione blushed as she made a motion for him to turn around. 

“Oh yeah, of course.” She smiled at the pretty pink that stained his cheeks right as turned to face the door. “You could have just ran to your room to get some pajamas you know?”

“Yeah, but then I would have to deal with either Draco’s annoying smirk, or catching him mid change. Either one would have caused great pain to my eyes.” Theo released a deep chuckle. “You can turn back around now.” 

“Fuck,” The word hung in the room between them as Nott turned around and stared at her. After several moments Hermione started to shift on her feet uncomfortably and pull the shirt’s hem down a little lower over her thighs. The shirt was long enough it did come to about mid-thigh, but his eyes were staring at her as if she was the most beautiful thing on the planet and she was unsure of how to respond to this attention. Finally, he coughed into his hand before rubbing the back of his head and motioning towards the bed. “I can-” he coughed again as his voice came out slightly husky, “I can take the floor, but the Gryffindor blanket is mine and is non-negotiable.” 

“Are you daft? I’ve slept in here before, just get in bed.” Hermione walked over to the side she had stayed on all those nights ago before sliding down into the satin sheets. The shirt came up a little high as she did, but she didn’t adjust it. She had knickers on anyway, and was covered by the blanket. 

Nott stood there for a moment before going to his closet. It was big enough for him to close himself inside of. When he finally emerged several minutes later he was wearing blue and black plaid sleeping pants, and a new, clean, short-sleeved grey vest. He climbed in very carefully next to her giving her plenty of space. With a roll of her eyes and a huff Hermione moved closer to Nott until she was laying her head on his shoulder, his arm delicately holding her waist. They stayed quiet for a long time. Neither speaking, just enjoying the fact that they were here. After trials, tribulations, and misunderstandings they were in each other's arms. The only place they would ever want to be. They fell asleep like that, curled around each other, ready for when the sun rose to face the world...together. 

* * *

The next morning Hermione woke to the soft touches of Theodore Nott as he rubbed her back. The sun was barely peeking through the dark curtains as she rolled closer to his side, rubbing her face into the soft cotton on his chest. His hands continued to work magic, creating small patterns along her back causing her to release a light satisfied sigh. She heard Theo’s deep, rumbling, chuckle as he finally spoke. 

“Merlin, witch. You have no idea how long I have waited for you to want to stay in my bed.” He whispered, as his other hand propped itself up behind his head. “I don’t want to stop holding you.” He nudged down into her hair and took a deep breath, “I don’t think I will ever want to stop.” She let a small smile spring across her face as she enjoyed his attention. Eventually, a thought popped into her brain making the smile falter just a bit. 

“I am sorry...for not talking to you both after what Pansy said.”

“Can we save this discussion for another time, I don't want to think about Parkinson right now.” He begged, his lips tracing her hairline. 

“I just couldn’t believe that you actually found me attractive.” Hermione’s voice was muffled and she nuzzled deep into his neck. She thought she heard him shudder as she exhaled, but it could have been her mind playing tricks on her. 

“Found you attractive? You are the most beautiful witch in the world to me. You are kind, thoughtful, intelligent, and forgiving. Not to mention you are bloody gorgeous.” He rolled her over until she was slightly under him, and leaned down. Gently one hand came up to caress her cheek, his thumb lingering near her mouth. “You bite your lip when you study. Did you know that?” He intoned as he lowered his head to kiss her gently before pulling her lower lip in between his teeth, giving them a very gentle nibble that caused a moan to erupt from her mouth. 

“When you are ready there are things I am going to want to do with you.” His kisses continued for a moment before he looked down on her, pupils blown wide with his arousal. 

“Tell me more,” She looked up at him, her own eyes half lidded. He let a small smirk tilt one half of his face.

“Sure you are ready for that, love. I don’t want to scare you away,”

“Don’t you worry, I am not going anywhere,” She rolled her hips until they pressed against his groin causing him to release a sharp breath, and a quick laugh. 

“I want to do things that will make you blush just by thinking about them.” His lips were on her neck gently kissing her, as one hand moved slowly to her thigh. He pulled his head back slightly, his eyes locked on hers asking her if she wanted him to stop. She didn’t. She had been an emotional wreck for hours last night, and wanted nothing more than the comfort of his touch. When she made no move to stop him his fingers trailed up under the shirt to her hip where he gripped it firmly. “Things that will make you beg for me.” He kissed her lightly on the lips until their tongues finally met in the center. It wasn’t a battle for dominance. It never was with Theo. This was a dance, a dance that only two partners could participate in. Two partners equal in almost every way. Two partners who were willing to give themselves over to the other with unwavering trust. When he pulled back he looked at her with his forget-me-not eyes causing her to come to a revelation. She knew then that there would never be another man that could take his place in her heart. “Maybe, I’ll be the one begging you.” He gave a breathy laugh, but when she rolled her hips again he nearly choked, taking several moments to catch his breath at the sudden contact.

“Theo, please touch me,” She begged, reaching up and grabbing his shoulders. 

“I am, love.” He smirked, resting his forehead forward on hers, panting slightly from the effort of maintaining his control. 

“No.” She trailed one hand down until it rested on his, the one still clinging to her hip. Gently she led his hand to the very edge of her knickers. 

“Merlin, witch, I thought you might need more time,” He locked eyes with hers. When he saw the determination lighting her face, he smiled, “Maybe I was wrong,” he whispered before gently pulling the cotton down and past her legs, fingers trailing across skin as he did. The resulting shiver that crossed her body caused him to smirk, slightly smug with his success, before reaching up her thigh. When he finally found what he was looking for, and when his fingers finally touched that small bundle of nerves, Hermione cried out. 

“Apparently you didn’t need more time at all,” He groaned as he continued his gentle minstrations, “Fuck, Ganger you are already so wet.” His words, though filthy, were spoken in pure reverence of her. It was like he was whispering a prayer to her as his fingers worked. Building her closer to the edge she had become an acquaintance to last night. She hoped that, through him, she and that tipping point would become close friends. He worked until she was gasping and gripping at his arms, nails digging into his pale skin almost to the point of drawing blood. Still he worked, not seeming to care about the pain. “Hermione,” She blinked several times, confused at when she had closed her eyes, “Can I-Can I taste you?” It was adorable the way he flushed when he asked her. Lacking strength to speak she just nodded, causing him to shake his head, “I need you to say it, I need you to say I can.” He commanded, moving his fingers away from her. 

“Please...Theo please I want you to taste me,” Confidence. When she was with him it always came out. Knowing that no matter what happened she could lean on this Slytherin brought out a strength she had been missing in her life. She was comfortable with him, and with his comfort he provided came the confidence that she was reclaiming. When she said his given name he pulled his bottom lip in his teeth.

“I will never get used to that,” He moaned before adjusting himself in his pajama pants, and pulling the sheets so he could climb underneath them. 

“No.”

“No?” He pulled back, misunderstanding her hesitance. 

“Don't cover yourself Theodore.” He nodded simply, eyes never leaving hers, and pulled the blankets back so she was revealed to him. The resulting hiss from his quick intake of air was so loud she thought it might echo through the room, that it might break the silencing charm she prayed was still active. 

“Fuck,” Before he could comment further he pushed himself down between her thighs. Running his hand up the pale flesh until it met her hips. He lowered his lips there giving her the occasional nip on her flesh, taking care to bite her hips, before bringing his tongue across the flesh of her stomach.

“Please, Theo,” Hermione begged again. 

“Please what, love?” He chuckled at her frustrated whimper, “Alright, alright. Don’t kick me out of my own room.” He released a slow breath across her core causing more frustrated whimpers before he tentatively licked. The moan he released caused his tongue to vibrate and created a whole new wave of sensations through Hermione’s body. “You taste so fucking good.” He huffed out, before going back to work. With slow simple moves of his tongue he brought Hermione to a world she didn’t know existed. A world of pure pleasure and with only one goal. She had always thought that having a man between her thighs would feel wrong, or dirty. But in this moment, a moment shared with him, she had never experienced anything so beautiful. He was gentle, yet commanding. He responded to every sigh or gasp she released readily and with purpose. He learned her favorite spots with practiced ease and eventually had her crying his name in ecstasy that she was sure only he could produce. When she glanced down and saw his dark head of hair between her thighs she groaned. When he looked up and caught her gaze, still maintaining his pace, she was done for. She lept of that edge readily into the waiting bliss. 

When she finally came down from her high and looked down, she saw him staring at her like he was staring at a masterpiece. “Simply beautiful,” he whispered before biting his lip yet again. He crawled over top of her slowly until he could kiss her. She tasted him on her lips, and while she wasn’t sure it was the best thing she had ever tasted it certainly wasn’t the worst. He kissed her slowly, languidly. Like honey spreading out of a jar, and just as sweet.

At least it was that way until Hermione felt the need crawl back inside her, creating an inferno of lust deep in her stomach. Wicked courage spread across her soul, coating her features in a sinful grin. Unfortunately for Theo he was too caught up in the taste of his witch to see the lascivious expression. Before he could stop her, she had him flipped on his back and was lowering herself between his legs as well. “Granger,” He warned, “I-I won't last.” 

“I don’t care, I need to taste you too.” 

“Fuck witch, when you say shit like that I definitely wont last,” He groaned before propping himself up on his elbows. “You don’t have-”

“I know,” She replied as she started to untie his drawstring on his pajama bottoms. “Do you want me too?”

He nodded his head slowly while maintaining eye contact. “No, Theodore, I need your words.”

“Yes, Merlin and Morgana yes. Nothing on this planet would make me happier at this moment than for you to suck my cock. But-” Before he could say anymore Hermione had banished his pants leaving him bare before her, except for his grey sleep shirt, “Fuck, you are so good with magic.” He huffed out. 

“Is that a turn on?” She asked, cocking an eyebrow at him, slightly amused as a smirk formed on her face. 

“On you? Anything is a turn on.” He said seriously, “You could be wearing Snapes robes and I would still get a stiffy.” 

She laughed a little at that before she lowered herself down. “Theo...I-dont- I mean I’ve never,” He nodded at her encouragingly. 

“Just do what feels natural, I promise as long as you dont bite me you won't disappoint. I will let you know when you do something I really like.” Reaching up one hand he stroked her cheek, “You still don’t have to if you are not re-” His word was cut off by a guttural groan as Hermione lowered her mouth over him. He did not disappoint in length, so she did struggle to take him all. He whispered words of encouragement when he wasn’t struggling to breath, or when the occasional moan wouldn't work its way out through his clenched teeth. She tried to alternate between licks and light sucks, not really knowing what exactly she was doing, but feeling encouraged by his sounds. He wasn’t wrong, she didn’t feel like she had been down there very long, maybe five minutes when he started to try and pull her up between gasps of her name, “Hermione stop-you gotta-im gonna,” She swatted his hands away as he orgasmed in her mouth, crying her name, as he released down her throat. She wanted to taste him and she wasn’t disappointed. He was slightly sweet and salty with a hint of a flavor that was indescribable as anything other than cum. Not that she had ever tasted it before. 

Unfortunately, she wasn’t really prepared for what was going to happen. Sure she had read about it, but she had never done it before. So, when he didn’t stop producing after the first squirt she found her mouth getting full, and having not made a proper seal around herself and his length, some had escaped her lips and were now dripping down her chin. She swallowed the rest. 

When he finally looked at her, he just stared before releasing another low groan, as his cock twitched again. She knew she had to look a right mess. Her hair was going in all different directions, both from sleep and from their morning tussle in the sheets. Her cheeks were probably bright red from the nerves she felt, still thinking she might not have met his expectations. She was still wearing his Puddlemere United shirt from last night, and now had cum dripping on her chin that she didn’t want to wipe away for fear of ruining the garment. “I...was that good?” She asked meekly.

He sat up and pulled her to him before using the edge of his shirt to wipe her face clean. “Honestly? Best fucking blow job I’ve ever had.” He smiled lazily, as he pushed hair out of her face. “You are amazing, you know that?” She blushed furiously before biting her own lip and going to kiss him. She hesitated when she remembered what was in her mouth moments ago, not knowing how he would react. She had heard Lavender Brown tell Pavarti Patil that some boys don't like receiving kisses after, and she didn’t want Nott to reject her. Theo just rolled his eyes before grabbing her face and kissing her fiercely. They snogged heavily for several minutes, enjoying the feel of each other, and the taste that they shared of their two bodies, before he pulled back. 

“Please be mine,” His request was stated quietly, his eyes closed while their foreheads rested upon the other. 

“My heart is yours, Theo. Just please protect it.” She whispered back. He released a shaky breath before nodding fiercely, kissing her again and falling on top of her. She laid back, allowing him to stroke her face, before lowering his head to her neck and biting lightly. He was gentle for several moments before finally-after several encouraging moans- sucking lightly to mark her. “I am yours,” she murmured. He chuckled deeply before pulling back, and looking deep into her eyes. Rich brown colors swirling together, and bringing warmth wherever they looked.

“Always?” His voice was a whisper as he gazed down at her. His eyes open with no walls blocking out emotions. She could see the fear that still lay just behind his open expression. She hoped she could snuff the fear out, and show him the love that he deserved. Still, he waited for her to answer, peering down at her as if she was an angel that had lost her wings, as her hair flared out behind her head. Riotous curls claiming his pillow for their own. 

“Always.”


	33. Secrets and Ships

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

That Sunday Hermione awoke in her own bed, and stretched out her legs and arms until she was just shy of slight pain. The previous day, after Hermione and Theo’s wonderful wake up call with each other, they had laid in bed for another hour just holding on to one another. Hermione tried to ignore the knowing smirks that Draco shot her way when she had exited Theo’s bedroom, but eventually had to send a small stinging hex at him to stop his cheeky grins. Harry and Ron had shown up as promised and the four boys, Theo included, had escorted her to Madam Pomfry. The old Healer had told Hermione that they would start with weekly counseling sessions starting the following Tuesday, and gave her a small dose of a weak calming drought to take once a day that would help keep her emotions balanced until she could speak about what she was going through with a professional. Hermione reached across her bed to her end table, taking the small purple vial of calming draught and downed it in one quick gulp. Then, she ran to her closet and filtered through her clothes. 

Today was the day.

A date. 

A date with Theodore Nott. 

Well shite. 

Hermione yanked all her clothes out from her closet, and stared down at them pulling her mouth to the side in contemplation. This was different from their typical ‘study date’s’ because now both of them knew where they stood. Which left Hermione unsure of how to dress in front of him. Crying out in frustration Hermione kicked the pile of clothes, which barely moved much to her annoyance, and silently declared none of them worthy. Before she decided to burn all her clothes and convince Ginny to loan her something to wear, there was a knock on the door. She huffed again in irritation before walking over to the door and flinging it open. 

“Merlin, Granger. Do you always open your door still in your night clothes?” Draco smirked pushing through her doorway to sit on her bed.

“Do you always enter a ladies room without an invite,” She shot back, as she closed the door rolling her eyes. 

“I have the password, I could have just entered. I thought it would be more acceptable for me to knock instead.” He answered pointedly while picking up the snow globe that Theo had given her for Christmas. She watched silently as he shook it, and there was a flurry of snowflakes before it revealed a lake surrounded by trees. As she watched a few tiny figures on brooms raced around the lake on a repetitive loop. Draco smiled at it before setting it back down. 

“Where was that?” She inquired while looking through the abandoned pile of clothes, still holding hope that she would find something suitable to wear. 

“The lake at the edge of my property. Zabini, Nott, and I used to ride our brooms out there. It’s far enough away from the Manor that most of the time our parents would just leave us there instead of trying to find us. It was a nice escape. What does it show you when you shake it?” Hermione felt her face heat up before she looked at him. 

“The library, with Theo.” He raised an eyebrow at her, before laying back on her bed. 

“So...what are you going to wear on this ‘date’?” He drew out the words in mock boredom. Hermione could tell he was actually genuinely interested though. 

“I don't know!” She cried out in frustration, throwing herself on her mattress sideways so she was laying with her head on his stomach, feet dangling off the side of the bed. “Where is he taking me?”

“Can’t tell you that, Granger, I have been sworn to secrecy!” She looked up at him, his smirk was firmly in place. 

“But you know?”

“Of course, he was worried you wouldn’t like it. Why  _ he _ thinks I would know if you would like it I have no clue, but I was questioned for hours.” He shrugged before propping both hands behind his head. 

“What can I do to get a hint?”

“Tell Weasley I am far more attractive than he will ever be?” 

“Seriously Draco,” She scoffed. 

“I was being serious-ow ok,” He smiled down at her as she smacked him lightly on his stomach, “Give me some of your sugar quills I gave you for Christmas. I am all out and can’t go to Hogsmeade because that blasted idiot from Alchemy only had today open to finish up our project.” She sighed in defeat before rolling herself up into a seated position. She summoned her box of sugar quills and opened it up for him. 

“You still have so many left,” He commented quietly before picking up a few. 

“I didn’t open it until Friday night,” He nodded.

“I guess I hoped that Theo was lying when he said they sat outside your dorm this past month.”

Her eyes were downcast. “Thank you Draco. For both of my presents.” She touched him lightly on his arm. “That picture means so much to me.” 

“I can’t believe you trusted Pansy over us.” He whispered, still staring at the box of sugar quills. He sounded so hurt Hermione couldn’t help but give him a strong hug. His arms wrapped around her as they sat on her bed. He buried his face in her curls and held her tightly. “No more trusting any serpents besides us!” He demanded as he pulled back, his face serious. 

“What about David Travers?” Malfoy rolled his eyes, “Don’t tell me you don’t like him.”

“It’s not that, the bloody git hexed me twice during our,” he motioned between them, “little spat. I would of fucking retaliated if I didn’t know he was doing it for your honor. He’s a good kid, I guess.” Draco relented a little before taking a few more sugar quills out of her box. 

“Hey!” She shouted, swatting his hand, “How many are you taking exactly?”

“Enough to get you caught up to how many you  _ should _ have left if you had opened it on Christmas like you were supposed too,” He smirked smugly before opening one up and starting to nibble on it. 

“Pure-blooded brat,” 

“Muggle-born loser,” 

“That’s it! You are banished from my supply of sugar quills.”

“I bought them!”

“And gifted them to me, making them mine.” 

“Fine, then you don’t get any hints for your date.” He jumped up from her bed, sugar quills in hand, walking haughtily back towards the door. 

“No!” She cried before jumping up after him, “You gave your word.” 

“Fine, Granger.” He turned back to her smirk back in its rightful place. “Dress casually. Those muggle jeans do wonders for a girl's bum so I suggest wearing them. A nicer blouse will be ok,  _ but _ you might get chilly so I would infuse it with some warming charms. Finally, don’t wear heels or sandals. Closed toe shoes. Repeat after me Granger, a hair brush is my friend!” He intoned seriously motioning to her hairbrush on her dresser. He dodged the shoe that was thrown at him and began making his way back towards the door. 

She rolled her eyes, “I am assuming most of that is real advice, so thank you.” She then waved him off after giving him one more sugar quill. He smiled at her in thanks before walking back out the door. 

“A hairbrush is my friend,” She murmured before grabbing it and running it through her tangled tresses. “Easy for him to say,” she continued her murmurings as she got dressed, trying to make herself look semi presentable for her date. 

* * *

Theo met Hermione in their common room so that they could walk together from their dorm. She had decided on a dark pair of muggle jeans, and a dark blue knitted jumper that had a v-neck, showing off the pale skin of her chest without revealing too much cleavage. She had left her hair down, but had the scrunchie that he had transfigured for her on her wrist just in case she had needed it. He was wearing a pair of pale blue muggle jeans and a black jumper that clung to his chest and arms. His hands were shoved in his pockets as he shifted his weight every once in a while in his trainers. The only word to describe him was handsome as he brushed his hair back from his blue eyes and gave her a nervous smile. She summoned her cloak and tied it on, dragging her eyes up and down him as she did. 

“You look gorgeous,” He wrapped his cloak around his shoulders and tied a small scarf around his neck. Before they left he grabbed a small satchel and draped it around his body. He offered his arm to her and she took it with a grateful smile as they began walking down the corridors. 

“You look quite nice yourself,” She smiled up at him, careful not to trip down the first staircase, “So what are we doing today?” They stood against the railings of one of the staircases as it shifted to the next platform. 

“Well, I have a couple of options for you,” He replied, they walked to the next set of stairs and stood on them, “We can go to Hogsmeade for Valentines where I can shower you with love, and affection and make sure every bloke in Hogwarts knows your mine...or we can do something a bit more private. I think I know which one you will pick, but I have planned for both.” Hermione thought hard about which one she wanted. It would be nice to go to Hogsmead and spend time with Theo at one of the shops, but honestly there was nothing she wanted more than to spend with him...just him. They were standing by the doors that led out of the Great Hall before she spoke. 

“Private, preferably.” He nodded giving her a warm smile before leading her down towards the lake. They made their way up the winding path until they were next to the boat house. It was a relatively cool day, but the sun up above warmed them as they bounded happily on the trail. No one ever used the boats, most teenagers were scared of what the Giant Squid would do to them if they got too far out on the lake. He ducked inside through a side door, and she followed close behind into the dim building. She could hear the lapping of the water against the planks of the dock, and smell the damp wood as the chilly air blew through the opening. 

Nott walked over to a large wall that contained several ships in glass bottles. The ships and boats of various sizes were rocking back and forth on magical water inside the bottles, being tossed on the waves. Carefully he walked up and down the aisle until he found a small schooner that he liked. He grabbed it, and snatched her hand taking her out to the dock that was positioned just to the outside of the boathouse.

“What are we doing?”

“Well, I was going to take you sailing.” He looked unsure, as he stared at her, “But if you don't want to-” 

“No that sounds amazing. I just didn’t know you could sail.” 

He gave her a grin as he tossed the bottle in the air, and slightly out over the lake. While it was on its return journey to earth he cast a spell at the bottle, causing the boat to enlarge itself until it was at normal size, the glass turning into sparks around it as it burst from its home. It was a relatively large sailing boat, white in color, with dark black sails. The name on the side read  _ The Serpent's Journey _ . “How about you, Granger? Ever sailed before?”

“Actually, yes.” She stared at him as the loading plank magically made its way from the sailboat and to the dock. Nott quickly busied himself untying some of the rigging, “My family hailed from Norway before settling in Britain. Being a top notch sailor is in my blood.” He commented before giving her his hand and helping her cross the last distance from the dock to the deck of the boat. Then, he gave a wave of his wand pushing the boat slightly away from the sturdy wooden planks. The sun streamed down over the top of them, making Hermione wish she had packed some sunglasses before her eyes adjusted to the way it glittered off the waves. Nott flicked his wand towards the sails causing them to unfurl. She felt a lurch as the sail caught the wind, and they began to glide across the surface of the Black Lake. 

“My mother and father owned a sailboat,” She continued after making sure they were on their way. “They used to take me sailing regularly.”

“I have several. Nott Manor is located right on the edge of the North Sea. Maybe we...well maybe I could take you sailing out there. It's out in Goswick, a small town just south of here...you could come over on Easter.” He kept his eyes out over the water, occasionally flicking them to her, and quickly back out over the glassy black surface. 

“I-” Hermione hadn’t thought about Easter. One year. The anniversary. “You’re not staying at Hogwarts?”

“I can’t actually,” He tied up a sail to keep them on a steady course before moving back to the wheel, “There are some things I have to take care of that can only be done at home.” He motioned for her to take a seat next to him. She did so, crossing her legs underneath her and silently thanking Draco for the warning about warming charms! The cool wind spread across her face quickly causing her nose to become slightly red. “I am inviting you to spend this holiday with me though, if you want.”

She thought about it for a few moments before giving him a small smile and nodding. He released a breath she hadn’t noticed he was holding before giving her a smile that could have lit up the night. “Brilliant! I will have to think of what else we can do at the Manor on break, but I am sure I can figure it out.” 

“Where are we sailing to? Just around the lake or…”

“No, there is an island out here that I thought you might like. I usually fly out to it, but I know you don’t like to fly so sailing it is!” Hermione smiled at him again. It was so thoughtful of him to remember that she didn’t like to fly and to have planned around that fear to go sailing instead. She had never had anyone be that considerate of her fears before, mostly that had just told her that she didn’t like it because she wasn’t good at it. Hermione was a fine flyer though. She had passed the class just like everyone else, it was more the idea of falling that made her frightened. She was glad that Theo hadn’t tried to convince her to fly, and had instead figured out a way to make her comfortable on their date.

Hermione took the time to look at him as he drove the boat out across the water. His dark hair was shining under the sun, reflecting the light off of its surface. His face was flushed from the cool air as it stung his skin, and he looked serene. She nibbled her lip before standing next to him slowly, as he commanded the wheel with an ease that only came from years of sailing. He glanced down at her, locking eyes as he tried to maintain a steady course. “Careful Granger, when you look at me like that I might get the wrong idea.” His voice had dropped a little lower in timber, and she could hear the husky quality it began to take on. 

“Or the right one.” She retorted, grabbing his arm and pulling it from the wheel. She entwined their fingers together before she wrapped his arm around her waist and rested her head on his shoulder.

“You never told me what your new favorite color is.” He commented, tucking his head against hers. 

“It's Forget-me-Not, pretty ironic isn’t it.” She laughed, as he pulled her fingers onto the wheel. He adjusted the way they were standing so that he was behind her, both of his large hands covering her smaller ones, his arms formed a brace on either side of her.

“Don’t worry, Granger, I could never forget you.” They sailed like that for the rest of the trip. His arms wrapped around her, and her head leaned back against his shoulder. Both taking turns steering the boat towards their new destination. 


	34. Under the Stars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

The island that Theodore took Hermione to was relatively small. There was an old wooden dock that he pulled the boat up to. He lowered the gangplank, and trotted down the wooden board smiling up at her as he began tying the boat securely to the dock. He offered his hand again as she descended, making sure she was steady on the rocking boat. From there he walked her up into the shrubbery that lined the island, and towards the singular tree that called the small patch of land home. The tree itself was massive, with a trunk that was every bit 3 meters in diameter. It was an old oak, with rounded leaves and several bowtruckles tucked into the limbs and trunk. Fresh grass lined the island, creating springy ground as she walked up to the tree, smiling as the bowtruckles looked on curiously. There was a nook tucked in between two of the roots which made a perfect place for reading. 

“I used to come here a lot after He came back. Almost as much as my other thinking spot, but not quite as often.” Theodore spoke softly staring up at the big tree. The old limbs danced lightly in the breeze as it crossed off of the lake, causing Hermione to shiver slightly. One of the older bowtruckles climbed down quickly, making a small purring noise as it crept closer to the two students. Theodore chuckled before offering his hand as a platform to the small creature, who climbed happily up onto it before scaling his thick jumper and clambering onto his shoulder. Theodore, noticing Hermione watching him, shrugged, “They trust me.” 

He shifted his feet a little, clearly uncomfortable, before reaching for a small black wool blanket he had in his bag. He fluffed the fabric, laying it out flat on the ground between the two roots, and sat down on it. He scooted back against the large trunk, as the other bowtruckles climbed down and held onto the tree around his head. Theodore spread his legs, making room for her between his thighs. She sat down tucking herself safely up against his chest. “I don’t blame them,” Hermione commented as she adjusted up against him, “You are pretty trustworthy.” She felt his breath catch in his throat as he leaned down and kissed her shoulder. 

“Thank you,” he coughed, clearing his throat while pulling a book from his backpack,  _ her _ new-old copy of the  _ Fellowship of the Ring _ . “I hope you don’t mind, you left it in the study.” He ducked his head shyly before cracking it open with practiced ease. 

“Not at all, I would have picked it up but I was a little distracted by everything on Saturday,” She sheepishly lowered her head. She felt bad for forgetting it deep in Ravenclaws study, but so much had happened on Saturday, she had barely enough time to run to the study and grab her wand. When she had noticed the worn book there that day, she didn’t have her bag on her, and didn’t want to just carry the copy out in the open. She was scared she might drop it, or something equally terrible. She had planned to come back and get it that night, but Theo had distracted her with his lips.

“Granger, it was safe in the study. It’s fine really.” He kissed her curls while adjusting himself behind her to get more comfortable. 

After a couple of seconds she nodded speaking again softly, “Read to me?” Laying back on his chest. Hermione relished in the warmth seeping through his abdomen and into her back. He wrapped his arms around her, propping the book in front of them before releasing a long sigh, and resting his chin on her shoulder. 

“Of course. ‘When Mr. Bilbo Baggins of Bag End…*’” Theo began, his voice was low and comforting, and the words flowed from him as if he had practiced them a thousand times. Which, she supposed, he had. They stayed like that for a long time, sitting with each other. She kept waiting for his voice to grow hoarse, but it never did. Continuing on in its rhythmic cadence of comfort, as fairy lights began to shine deep within the tree and the sun started to set. She listened to him, her eyes resting on the Black Lake, as the yellow sun reflected off its surface, turning into beautiful pinks and oranges. The cool breeze off the lake, caused her to shiver again and Theo held her tighter. Finally, they stopped reading once they reached chapter 7, because her stomach emitted an audible growl. 

“You hungry, love?” He whispered in her ear before dropping a small kiss to her neck. The shivers that raced through Hermione this time had nothing to do with the cold. 

“Yes,” She felt a warm blush creep through her cheeks at the sound of her breathless voice. 

“Good.” Hermione heard the smile in his voice, even if she couldn't see it, “I brought us some food on the boat, we just have to go to our next location before we can eat.” He stood up slowly, extending a hand to help her up.

“How many locations have you planned?” Hermione asked, slightly impressed he had put so much effort into their date. He cocked his head in thought, tucking the book gently in his bag.

“Just one more,” he shook out his blanket slightly, depositing it in his bag as well once he was satisfied all the dirt was gone. Finally, he used his hand to create a bridge for the bowtruckle to make the way from his shoulder to it’s tree again, giving it a wave goodbye before turning back to her, wrapping his hand around her waist he walked her back to their boat. 

They got settled on board, staring out over the water as the sun sank the last distance below the waves. He took the wheel again, as he commanded their small vessel to the center of the lake just as the stars started to make their appearance, blinking in the sky like a million fireflies in the night. As Hermione stared off across the water, she released a low, “Wow,”. The stars reflected off of the cool surface of the lake creating a perfect reflection of the night sky. Gazing out over the dark water, she found it hard to tell where the lake ended and the horizon of the sky began. “It’s beautiful,” She whispered. 

“Yeah,” Nott replied while digging in a storage compartment along the boat, “It is.” He smirked, as he found what he was looking for before turning back to her, “I would say something cheesy like ‘not as beautiful as you’, but...you already know I think you are the most beautiful thing in the world, so I feel it might be redundant.” He gave her a cheeky wink before transfiguring several large comfy pillows out of extra rope that was on the boat. The pillows were big enough that they were practically a bed, and he propped them up against the edge of the boat before lowering himself down to sit. He motioned for her to sit beside him. She did so, slightly ungracefully as the boat got rocked by a small wave, causing her to trip. He caught her, laughing, as they readjusted to get settled down amongst the plush bedding. 

“I hope you weren’t expecting three courses,” He motioned to a small plate she hadn’t noticed before, stacked with turkey sandwiches and crisps. “I honestly don't know how to cook much,” Hermione bit her lip. This was the same thing they ate together when he had brought her down to the kitchens after hours. She wondered if he remembered. She glanced up at him, peeking beneath her lashes, from the sharp gleam in his eye she suspected that he did. 

“It looks delicious.” She took one of the sandwiches, before taking a big bite happily gobbling it down. 

“I’m glad you like it,” He grabbed his own. They ate in silence for a little while, the only sound was that of the waves on the side of the boat, and the song of crickets from off on the shores of the many islands among the lake. Once they were finished he lay back on the pillows before propping on his arm behind his head. A few fairies had followed them out from the island, curiously gazing at the grown humans as they lay on their makeshift bed. The lights played with the stars, each competing for brightness. It was a shame, but the fairies never stood a chance against the night sky. “There’s Draco,” He motioned up to the many stars that pierced the blackness. 

She lay back on his chest looking to where he motioned. “There is Casseopiea!” Hermione replied excitedly before tucking deeper into him. She shivered slightly and felt his arm tighten around her waist. He grabbed his dark wand, and cast a warming charm around them. They lay stargazing for several moments before Hermione propped herself up on her elbow and looked down at him. 

“Theo?”

“Mmmm?” He pulled his eyes from the sky to gaze at her. She noticed that they had not changed from forget-me-not since she had met him in that morning. This was the longest they had gone without changing color. 

“Where is your thinking place,” The shift was so sudden, Hermione thought she missed it in a blink of her own. His eyes hardened slightly before changing to royal blue, as he shifted beneath her to get a better look at her face. 

“The Forbidden Forest,” He replied shortly, “Granger-” He hesitated before sitting up and propping his arms on his bent knees. “I want to tell you, I just…”

“Theo, you have shared enough.”

“Granger-”

“No. You have. You can tell me when you are ready, and not a second before,” She reached a hand out, and placed it on his shoulder, he leaned towards her. “I am sorry that you had to give me your memories.”

“I’m not,” He shook his head before turning back to her, “Honestly, Granger, I would have shown you  _ everything _ if that meant you would trust me.”

“I should have just trusted you anyway” Hermione looked away from him, not able to look into his trusting eyes. 

“Maybe,” He sounded sad as he spoke, “but I can’t blame you for being untrusting,” He grabbed her arm until she turned to him, “My father was-”

“A bastard.” Theo chuckled a little before shaking his head.

“I was going to say a Death Eater. My best friend was a Death Eater too. I don’t blame you for being suspicious. I do blame you for not talking to me.” He leaned in close to her. So close she could smell the turkey sandwich still clinging to his lips. 

“I will talk to you. Forever if that’s what you want.” She breathed, leaning in closer to him. 

“Forever is an awfully long time, Granger. You sure you are up to it?” He asked, cocking an eyebrow up at her, grinning and revealing the lone dimple on his left cheek.

“Forever with you? I think I can manage.” He smiled then, beating out the stars as the brightest thing in the night. He leaned in the rest of the way, reaching up to cradle the side of her face with his large hand, kissing her softly as the boat began to turn in the water. They stayed on the boat, floating together beneath the stars and the moon, both entangled in the other long after curfew. 

A few hours later, after they had returned their small vessel to its glass prison, they walked back through the castle quietly not wanting to be caught out of bed after hours. There was a small note attached to the portrait of Merlin’s Tower when they got back. It was on a cream piece of parchment with a peculiar ink that caused the elegant script to be written in a rainbow. They both glanced at each other before Hermione’s giggles were complimented by Theo’s strong deep chuckles. Luna. 

_ Hello,  _

_ I could not find either of you in order to provide you with the new Prefect Schedules, please see the attached one below and see if it is satisfactory. Also congratulations! I am very happy for both of you! _

_ Always your friend,  _

_ Luna C. Lovegood  _

Neither spoke on how they hadn’t told Luna they were together, instead they both just smiled at the parchment. Theo whispered the password, and they disappeared behind the portrait of Merlin's tower for another restful night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 2: * This is used to represent a direct quote from Book 1 of The Fellowship fo the Ring written By J.R.R. Tolkien. Not by me!
> 
> A/N 3: I am almost done writing this story but want to make sure I have covered all my lose strings. If there is something that hasn't been covered yet that you are still dying to know please comment it below so I can make sure that it is covered by the end of the story. Thank you so much for all the love and support, I honestly never expected to receive such a wonderful reception.


	35. S.T.A.H.P.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione stared at the group of prefects that had gathered for the meeting that following Monday. Theo and Luna stood on one side of her, with Calvin on the other. There were a total of twenty-six students from fifth year on seated all around the Defense Against the Dark Arts class. The classroom itself was empty aside from the gathering of students. Light shown through the numerous windows to the right of Hermione, allowing dust particles to swirl occasionally as the students shuffled about anxiously. The black board still had the remnants of the previous lesson from the first year students, describing the best ways to defend against unfriendly jinxes. Theo nodded to Hermione as she cast him a quick nervous glance, and Luna stared at her with bright blue eyes and serene smile. Calvin gave her a squeeze on her arm, his sandy brown hair shaggy and falling in front of his brown eyes. “You got this, Hermione.” He whispered. She took a deep breath and climbed on top of the desk that their professor so often used to gain the attention of his students. Coughing lightly she grabbed the attention of the crowd who quieted down when their 8th year head girl, and war heroine demanded attention. 

“Alright, so I'm sure you are all wondering why we called you here to meet in the D.A.D.A. class.” There were several murmurs of agreement, but no one outwardly spoke so she continued, “It has come to my-well  _ our _ ,” she motioned to the heads of house now positioned at her feet, “attention that there is still house animosity to an extreme degree.” Calvin slowly stepped forward as some students became restless. One stern look from the serious Hufflepuff got everyone to quiet down yet again as they waited for Hermione to continue. “I am sick of fighting.” Hermione heard herself say, even to her own ears she sounded tired. 

“Didn’t you get in a duel with Pansy just this year?” A Slytherin she knew as Tamara Burke called out from her place in the back. Tamara’s dark hair was tied back in a severe bun, with not a hair out of place. She was wearing dark make-up around her eyes, making her icy blue iris’ sharp and demanding. 

“I did. In defense of a member of someone in  _ your  _ house.” Hermione called back, motioning to the Slytherins who were grouped up like a school of fish, afraid a predator would pick them off. “I don’t judge based on House, not anymore.” Hermione lowered herself to Theo and held her hand out to him, he hesitated for a moment, asking with his eyes if she was sure. When she gave him a nod he smiled and climbed up next to her. She entwined their fingers together in both a show of solidarity and as a way to come out publicly as dating. They had skirted around each other during class, neither sure how the other wanted to proceed, but now Hermione knew, and she wasn’t backing down. Neither was he. He removed his hand from hers gently, and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her close before placing a kiss on her curls. The whispers that erupted from around them were that of shock, disbelief, and in some cases-like that of Tamara Burke-anger. 

“You’re with him?” A Gryffindor Prefect called from the back of the room.

“What will Harry think?” A Ravenclaw sneered.

“Or his father.” A Slytherin hissed. 

“That’s it though isn't it?” Luna sighed dreamily. Everyone stopped talking. For some reason, for the past few years Luna had maintained a level of respect that no one else could claim around the school. People no longer made fun of her, but listened when she spoke, enjoying her small spurts of wisdom and idioms, “You were all so worried about what everyone else would think, you didn't ask the right question.” Luna turned towards the couple standing on the table and asked patiently, “Are you two happy?” 

“Yes.” They answered in unison, twin smiles dawning their faces. 

“See?” Luna sighed as she walked down the aisle, “It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks, as long as they are happy. We are all witches and wizards, and we have been divided for too long. Pure-Blood, Half-Blood, Muggle-born. We all have magic. We are all powerful. We are all normal.” There were a couple giggles from that, but more people seemed to open up to the idea. 

“It doesn’t matter that he is a Slytherin, or that she is a Gryffindor.” Calvin joined in, “It doesn’t matter that I am a Hufflepuff or that Lisa is a Ravenclaw,” He motioned towards the door to indicate Lisa Turpin who wasn’t in the room, it was well known that they were seeing each other right now. “We have to stop the division created by that bloody hat.”

“It isn’t necessarily the hat,” Luna smiled at Calvin, “We should honor our differences in personality, not hide from them.” She waved her wand creating an image of the Hogwarts crest. She flicked it again, blurring the lines that separated the houses until it no longer existed and all that was left were the house mascots standing next to each other on equal planes. “It’s those things that we cannot control that we should not judge others on. The things that are chosen for us before birth. It’s not where we came from that matters, but how we work together when we get here.” 

“What do you suggest?” An unidentifiable voice called. 

“A group of students. Like the D.A..” Hermione called from her spot. “Students Together Against House Prejudice.” 

“S.T.A.H.P.?” Asked a Ravenclaw prefect with short brown hair, and bright hazel eyes. She cocked an eyebrow at Hermione, but one side of her mouth was turned up in a smile at the acronym. 

“Exactly.” Hermione smiled down at her, “I called you here to spread the word. If we see someone bullying someone else based on house, or in some cases blood status, we stop them. We stand up for what we want. A world where prejudice no longer is tolerated. That’s what  _ Dan _ has been trying to show us.” Hermione motioned to her choice of meeting place, “That we are stronger together, without the divide.” Theo squeezed Hermione's waist.

“Nott, you can’t be serious.” Burke called from her spot, “Your father-”

“Is in Azkaban.” Theo answered shortly. “As is yours. I am not going to follow my father. I suggest you start making your own decisions too.” Nott stared out across the room, royal blue eyes scanning the crowd. “We are the next generation, the world is literally at the tip of  _ our  _ wands.” This was the most speaking that the majority of them had ever heard him participate in. His voice was strong and commanding, similar to the way he read out loud, a confidence held just below the surface wanting to poke out. “No more wars. No more prejudice. One community.” He grabbed his wand and held it out, the tip glowing a beautiful emerald green before shining bright white. Hermione raised hers, causing the tip to glow a scarlet, and then white. Luna and Calvin followed with a rich blue, and canary yellow. Soon most of the group did the same, the room alight with the four colors of their houses before descending into the unifying glow of white. Hermione tried not to frown when she watched as a few Slytherins slipped out the door, clearly not taken with the idea. 

“Where do we start?” Calvin bounced excitedly as the group lowered their wands. 

“The same way any club starts, spread the word!” Hermione exclaimed equally excited. She felt a squeeze at her waist and smiled up at Theo who had a glint in his eye as he flashed her a grin, his dimple showing as he looked down at her. 

* * *

“What happened with Pansy?” Hermione looked over at David as he practiced his wand movements for Charms class. He looked up at her for a moment before tucking his wand into his sleeve and lowering his head towards her before dropping his voice. 

“I told McGonagall about what happened between me and her.” He let a breath loose, before lowering his head even more. “She examined both our memories from that night, she gave Pansy detention from now until the end of the year every Friday. I would watch yourself, Hermione, if I were you. She is going to be gunning for you.” Hermione nodded seriously before smiling up at him. 

“Did you hear?”

“About S.T.A.H.P.?” He laughed when she nodded, “Yes, Hermione, I heard. You have really got to work on your acronyms.” Hermione rolled her eyes as they packed up their bags, the study session for the day having ended. “I’m serious,” He said jokingly, “What’s next Perfectly Unsure Kids Enamored?”

“That sounds like you were desperately trying to make something spell puke.” She grinned at him as he walked her down to the Defense class. When she rounded the corner, she saw two familiar heads of hair and smiled warmly. 

“Worked it out between you three?” David asked, cocking an eyebrow at her expression. 

“Yeah, turns out Pansy was lying.”

“Well… that’s surprisingly not that surprising.” David continued as they approached his two housemates, “Should have really seen that coming.” David shook his head before extending a hand out to Malfoy.

“Oi, mate. No hard feelings?” David let a cocky grin slide onto his face, at Draco’s not so amused expression. Draco looked from David’s hand to Hermione, who nodded encouragingly. With a dramatic roll of his grey eyes he took the younger Slytherin’s hand. 

“Sure Travers, no hard feelings.” Draco sneered, smiling triumphantly when he squeezed David’s hand just a little too hard, making the other boy wince. Travers shook his hand a little when Malfoy let go before giving Hermione a salute. He raised his wand, having the tip glow a brilliant green followed by the bright white. She gave him a large smile, saluting back as he left the eighth year students in the hall. 

“Always raising an army for a cause, Granger?” Draco shook his head, laughing gently as he wrapped an arm around her shoulder. 

“Almost always. Since fourth year anyway.” She commented back. “Are you going to join?” She looked at him intently. He released a long sigh full of melodrama before moving his robe slightly out of the way to reveal a button. It had the Hogwarts crest on it, after watching for a couple seconds the button shimmered to reveal S.T.A.H.P. written across it in silver letters. 

“I suppose I have too. Don’t want to be left behind.” Hermione grinned at him before jumping into his arms, causing him to release a low oof. “Alright, alright. Go to Theo before he gets jealous again.”

“Did you make more?” She looked at him curiously. 

“Did I make more...what?”

“Buttons.”

“Are you guys talking about Malfoy’s new buttons?” Hermione heard Harry call from behind her. She turned around to see all of the Gryffindors in her D.A.D.A. class already wearing the S.T.A.H.P. buttons. She couldn’t help herself, she wrapped Harry in an equally strangling hug. “Merlin, Hermione.” 

“I can’t believe you are wearing them.” She exclaimed honestly as he patted her back. 

“Of course I am Hermione.” Harry looked at her, fixing his glasses that her hug had knocked askew, “I told you I was done with fighting too.” His dark hair stood up on end as he gave her a sheepish look before leaning in conspiratorially, “Honestly, I think these buttons are the coolest thing. I was kind of pissed off I couldn’t wear the other ones he made. Back in fourth year.” Hermione rolled her eyes at her best friend as he shrugged. 

“I think,” Theo called coming up to stand beside them, “That if we get Granger on a project, there’s nothing that can’t be done.”

“I think you’re right, Nott.” Harry smiled, pushing Hermione lightly on the arm. 

Hermione rolled her eyes before stepping forward, feeling emboldened by her new found success in her club so far, she grabbed Nott by his cheeks and pulled him down for a small snogging session right there in the hallway. They were met by a couple of wolf whistles and catcalls, as well as some jeering. She pulled back to see him smiling down at her, “That’s one way to tell the rest of the school, Granger. I was going to go with holding your hand, but this works too.” She shoved him playfully as they all filed into their D.A.D.A. class excited to finish their day, so they could be back in the privacy of their room. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 2: Thank you to those who let me know questions they still had. I am happy to announce that I had accounted for all of them! Also, have you guys figured out all the hints and Easter Eggs I have hidden in my story? At the very end I will try to announce all of them!


	36. Theo's Missing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> Mature Content Ahead: This fanfic was rated M for a reason. Ahead are some sexually explicit scenes. Please read at your own risk

Hermione moaned loudly as Theo licked up her inner body in one long swipe. He was going to fucking kill her. She just knew it. The way he moved while his head was between her thighs was something else. Every single lick had intention. Every flick filled with determination. “Theodore…” His name left her mouth in a wanton moan, echoing off the stone walls. He looked up at her, and slowly...delicately...he slid a single long finger inside. He was _inside her_. Merlin...he was inside her. The whimper that escaped her parted mouth caused him to nibble on his own bottom lip, as he leaned one of his flushed cheeks against her inner thigh watching her. She bucked against him with ferocious intent, his unoccupied hand spreading across her belly to hold her steady. 

They were in their common room. The fire flickering warmly beside him as she lay spread out on the chair she often claimed to study or read in. They had retired here after dinner. After several minutes of sneaking glances Theo had groaned out loud, and tossed their potions essay on the floor. He had wrapped her in his strong arms and devoured her in long sensual kisses. A quick snogging session, hands grasping and pulling on clothes and she was now beneath him. Her skirt had been hastily pushed up, and her knickers discarded somewhere near the kitchenette from where Theo had flung them in a rush to reach her core. He had nearly broken her in the way he had kissed his way down her stomach when she had pulled her shirt away from her body. He had nipped and licked slowly, lingering on the flesh just above her skirt before sneaking down lower. His blue eyes blazing in need, lust, and another emotion he rarely spoke of. 

“Patience, Granger, is a virtue.” He chuckled when she wiggled again in defiance. “C’mon witch...you can allow me a few more minutes,” Her brows scrunched up in need. Theo had been teasing her for almost half an hour at this point, and she was about to tell him where he could stick those extra minutes when his fingers curled. She cried out his name, followed by a few expletives that she tried not to use in mixed company. He smiled down at her, his dimple showing, as his fingers stroked her inside. Pulling out slowly before re-entering and rubbing against every piece of soft flesh inside of her. Every time she thought he was going to let her fall over the edge he would ebb away slowly, before building her back up towards her much needed crescendo. 

“Please, Theo…” She begged. 

“Just a little more, love. You can do it.” He leaned down kissing her stomach lightly as her fingers scratched his scalp. He moaned at the contact, and groaned when she pulled hard against his dark locks. Shoving him against her core until his mouth found her clit, and began licking slowly. Finally, he curled his finger just right before sticking a second digit in to join the first. She saw stars as his fingers continued to put varying degrees of pressure on a part of her she didn’t know existed. When she came down from her high he was smirking at her again. “Good girl.”

She tried to stand up, but the hand that had held her down pushed against her stomach, so she was locked against the fabric of the chair, holding her steady. “Theo?” Her eyes locked with his. 

“Ready for round two?” Confusion littered her face for a few seconds before Hermione's eyes widened. His intent became even more clear when his mouth descended on her again. Theodore moaned when he made contact with her, licking her until her thighs were shaking from the sensation. His fingers slowly entered her again. She cried out, and he went slightly faster responding to the calls of her body like a trained musician responding to cues. Her body quaked with his fingers, thighs twitching involuntarily as she creeped closer to a second ledge. “Look at me.” He demanded. She glanced down and saw his beautiful eyes staring up at her, “ _You_ are perfect.” Theo declared in a breathy whisper. He watched her as the words sunk in, she quaked again a whimper escaping her lips. He nipped lightly at her thigh, his fingers never stopping in their quest for results, “So perfect, Hermione.” At the sound of her name, she fell over. Jumping head long into a darkness that swallowed her whole. She felt her body go slack and stared into the abyss as it surrounded her, having never felt more satisfied in her life. She slowly became aware of his kisses against her cheeks. Then, she heard a couple worried calls of her name. Using her limited strength she pulled herself back to consciousness. 

“Hermione, are you ok?” Theo’s voice was littered with concern, and a small underlying amusement. She blinked a couple of times, remembering where she was.

“Theo? What happened?”

“Merlin, Granger, you scared me that’s what.” He brushed her curls from her face, which were currently sticking to her cheeks from sweat. “You lost consciousness for a second.” She smiled at him slowly, her eyes blinking away the post orgasmic bliss. 

“That wasn’t my doing.” She murmured quietly, adjusted herself so she was sitting on the chair. 

He smirked at her for a second, “No, I guess not.” He kissed her again, sweet and chaste as he tucked himself into the chair next to her, pulling her on his lap in the process. “I guess that means you can have two?”

“Yes, I suppose it does.” She chuckled.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” He asked, slowly wrapped his arms around her waist. She nodded, leaning back against him as he kissed her bare shoulders gently. He stopped kissing her, resting his chin on her shoulder, his breathing even as they stared at the fire. He stayed that way for several minutes, and she almost thought he had fallen asleep. A thought had been niggling in her brain for awhile now, and she finally felt like she had a second to speak with him. She took a deep breath before whispering into the common room.

“Theo?” 

“Mmm.”

“I-I am not your first...am I?” 

Theo stiffened behind her before pulling his head off of her shoulder. He nudged her until she turned to look at him. Theodore didn’t insult her by asking what she meant, he knew they both knew what she was referring to. Instead he released a breath from his nose before responding,“No, Granger. You’re not.” He looked guilty, and slightly worried as he spoke the words. 

“Who were they?” She breathed out the question quietly. She knew it had been more than one woman. She could tell by the way he knew his way around her body. He was experienced. That much had always been true. 

“I-Well…” Theo hesitated as he looked away from her. Taking in a deep breath he chewed his lip before answering, “A Ravenclaw my sixth year. I was trying to see if I was just randy, and that’s why you were always on my mind. I just really wanted to get you outta my head. For my protection, and for yours.” He looked away from her, “It didn’t work. You were still always on my mind. I thought maybe the Ravenclaw just wasn’t good enough, so I tried a Hufflepuff and then even a Gryffindor.” He looked down at the fire then, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment, “I thought maybe it was a forbidden fruit thing.” He shook his head frustrated, refusing to meet her gaze, “Seventh year I couldn’t do anything, but worry about you. One day I got super drunk off of Draco’s stash, and Daphne found me…I just wanted to forget about what could be happening to you while I was stuck here. I just wanted to forget that there was nothing I could do to help.” The fire crackled behind them as he tightened his grip around her, as if scared she would run away. 

“Then, I saw you at the end of the battle. You were so bloody gorgeous, and you were in Weasley’s arms. I knew then I didn’t have a chance, not really...not with you. After my father’s trial I went to a muggle bar, and found a girl there. A quick snog session and some oral in the bathroom...nothing to write home about, at least not for me.” He was quiet for a long time before he took a deep shaky breath, he looked at her again. His gaze begging, his eyes searching hers. “I wanted it to be you, I wanted to experience everything for the first time with you, but I thought that would never happen. Now, I am so bloody frustrated with myself! I have you, and I can’t share any of my firsts with you. I am so sorry, Hermione. I was such a bloody idiot.” He lowered his head until his forehead was resting on the corner of her shoulder. His arms clinging to her shirt. 

“Is that everyone?” He nodded, it’s action limited by his head's position on her shoulder. Hermione reached out and touched his flushed cheek. “Theodore Nott,” He looked up at her, “I don’t bloody care.” He blinked at her several times, his eyes shining with tears he hadn’t yet shed, “I don’t bloody care if I was your first. As long as I am your last!” 

He stared at her for several seconds, before he kissed her, “You will be the last lips I kiss,” He murmured as he kissed her, “The last girl I sleep with, the last everything if that is what you want.” 

“I want it. All that you can give me, I’ll take.”

“Good girl.”

* * *

The Thursday two weeks before Easter break, Hermione skipped lunch so she would be able to put the finishing touches on the cauldron they would be using for their potions project. She carved in the runes Theo told her would be the best for what they were trying to achieve. The Valerian Root had been preserved under a stasis charm and the Belladonna had just begun to bloom. Draco was busy going through the last variation of the Arithmancy equations to make sure they hadn’t missed anything. 

Once she had finished she buried herself in the study session where she was able to talk to David. He joked with her, she was happy to notice that most of the students in the library were now wearing the buttons Draco had made her. She hadn’t seen S.T.A.H.P. in action yet, but she had high hopes for when it finally took off. David walked her down to D.A.D.A. again and she thanked him as she waved him off. It didn’t escape her to notice that both of the Slytherins she would normally stand by were not with the rest of the class. She didn’t see either of them in fact, until Draco snuck in as the class started. He lost Slytherin ten points for tardiness, which he took with his normal cool grace. It wasn’t until Hermione made eye contact with him that she saw the panic in his grey eyes. 

All through the class she was jittery. Where was Theo? Why wasn’t he in class? He never skipped class. She glanced out the window where the sunlight was streaming in, and tried to listen to what Professor Jacobson was saying about how one would prepare for a career in the field battling the dark arts, but she couldn’t. As soon as class was dismissed Draco was standing at her side. 

“He got another letter at lunch.” His voice was low, a worried warble evident as he led Hermione out of the room by her arm. He didn’t need to say who the letter was from, or the ‘he’ they were talking about. 

“Where is he?” She demanded, jogging slightly to keep up with Draco’s long strides. 

“I don’t fucking know, Granger.” Draco growled, “I looked for him for an hour, skipped a class and everything. I can’t find him. Please tell me you know where he goes in the forest.”

“You don’t!?” 

“No, I bloody don’t. He never told me.” Draco shoved his hands through his hair. “He might do something fucking stupid, my firewhiskey was missing.”

“We have really got to discuss your never ending supply of whiskey, Malfoy!” Hermione scolded pacing in the hallway trying to figure out a plan. 

“Back to Malfoy?” Draco asked in reference to her use of his surname.

“If your idiotic addiction ends up hurting the boy I love, then yes.” 

“Love. Are you admitting it now?” She glared at him for a moment before looking around. This was the same place she had seen in Theo’s memory. She remembered clearly the way he had looked when he had sat down on his window seat, hiding behind a thick tome’s yellowed pages. She smiled slightly as she shifted to look down the hallway. She could still hear his breath hitch when she walked past. The memory of her was walking to the Great Hall with…

“LUNA!” Hermione took off running leaving a confused Draco behind her. After a second he took off following her, not taking long to catch up with her as his long legs carried him down the hallway following her swishing curls. She ran to the stairs taking them two at a time, and only stopping when they changed before her, preventing her from continuing. 

“What does Lovegood have to do with this?” Draco was standing beside her, not even out of breath, as she panted. Hermione took a second to regain her bearings, pulling in air down her burning throat. Damn quidditch players. 

“Just trust me.” He quirked an eyebrow slightly, but nodded as the stairs aligned and they headed up to the fifth floor. They continued down the winding halls, their shoes clacking in quick succession as they ran, finally making it to the entrance to the Ravenclaw common room. Winding up a solid wrought iron spiral staircase into the depths of the second tallest tower. 

The dark wood door stood menacingly in front of them, a perfect guardian for Ravenclaw’s charges. There was no handle on the door, but a single brass knocker shaped like the head of an eagle. As they stood there the metal creaked and groaned, before the metal came to life and the eagle spoke in a familiar cool voice. It was apparent that the knocker had been infused with the voice of Rowena herself, “What can you hold with your left hand but not your right?” 

“What the bloody hell?” Draco stood there for a moment staring at the knocker. 

“It’s a riddle. We have to answer it to enter.” They stared at each other. After several moments Draco opened his mouth as if he was about to answer, but he closed a moment later with an audible click second guessing his response. His brows furrowed in confusion. He released a huff, glaring at the offending door. Hermione’s mind was whirling, but everytime she thought she was following the right train of thought she was reminded that Theo was alone out there somewhere while she was here, effectively ruining the lead she was on. 

“Well this is fucking frustrating.” 

“Language young ward.” The door knob scolded before turning its beak away as if offended. 

“It’s your right elbow!” A dreamy voice called from behind them. The two eighth years turned around, nearly losing their balance from where they were perched on the spiral staircase in their haste. A familiar ditzy blond stood just below them, as the door swung open allowing them entrance. 

“Luna, I need your help.” Hermione grabbed her friend's shoulder tightly peering deeply into her crisp blue eyes. 

“You want to know where Theo is?” Luna asked in a quiet lofty voice as she stared at her friend. Vaguely Hermione heard the door close behind them, having waited long enough for them to enter, even if they had chosen not to. 

“Yes, I do actually.” Hermione replied, blinking away her shock. 

“Good. I think he needs you right now.” Luna grabbed a couple of books out of her backpack and handed them to Draco, his mouth agape. “Hold these please, Draco.” She smiled lightly at him as she continued to reach into her bag before she pulled a pendant. The pendant had a small mushroom contained in a glass orb. Hermione accepted it tentatively before putting it on over her bushy hair. Luna nodded and then turned to Draco, “I am afraid you can’t come with us, Draco. I only had one extra pendant to keep the Scrumples away.” 

“That’s quite alright, Lovegood.” Draco sputtered quickly, holding out his unoccupied hand as if she would produce the Scrumple charm from thin air, “Just make sure he is ok.” Draco still had hold of her books, holding them awkwardly in one hand when she refused to accept them when offered. 

“I probably will come back after delivering Hermione. Would you like to study Alchemy when I get back?”

“You’re in my Alchemy class?”

“No, but I have always found it rather fascinating. We can also discuss what has been bothering you.”

“Bothering me?”

“Yes, I think you need an ear to listen, and well I have two!”

“Ok, Lovegood. Sure.” Hermione watched the exchange with interest. There was something going on here, and she couldn’t quite figure it out. This would all have to wait for another day when she had more time to think about it though. The wizard she loved was outside after receiving another-probably threatening-letter from his father, they didn’t have a moment to waste. 

“Luna.”

“Right, come on now Hermione.”


	37. The Thinking Spot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

Hermione followed Luna closely as the blond walked freakishly fast down to the Forbidden Forest. Hermione stared out as the trees began to loom closer in front of them. Thousands of sentinels guarding the secrets that existed within its dark depths. Shadows danced just at the edges of the trees, obscuring all just beyond the first row guardians. Luna didn’t hesitate as she found a well worn, thin foot path keeping her brisk pace as she dodged low hanging tree branches, and prickly sticker bushes. The path was lined on either side with various vining plants and the occasional wildflower. As Hermione fought to keep pace with the blond she noticed footprints along the same path they were walking now. The size of the shoe marks meant they were a man, the tread indicated that the shoe was expensive. Theo. 

Hermione tried to keep up with the Ravenclaw as large storm clouds began to creep their way in through the sky. It hadn’t been stormy during D.A.D.A., so these clouds must have blown in quickly. The occasional droplet of water made its way into her thick hair, causing a shiver to work its way through her. She was only wearing a thin jumper and her school robes, not what was needed to go traipsing through the forest during a storm. She glanced again at the sky, worry marks working their way across her brow. They had a couple of hours of daylight left before the sun would set behind the lake, and they would be left dealing with worse things than a missing wizard. Hermione took a deep breath and grabbed her wand tightly in her hand, taking note of the thin piece of wood that was currently tucked behind the other witches ear.

Luna was a powerful witch, even with the quirks that occasionally possessed her. Hermione was confident that the two of them would be able to handle anything that came across them during their time in the forest. Hermione fingered the wood of her wand, relishing in the bumps that lined the bottom. Her old wand had a beautiful winding pattern that had wove across its vine length, giving the appearance of the wood’s namesake. This wand was the same length as her old one, but was slightly thicker at the base, with raised edges for gripping. 

She distantly recalled when she had brought Bellatrix’s wand back to Ollivander. The old wandmaker had smiled at her, and had reminded her that the wand had changed allegiances. If she wanted to keep Bellatrix’s wand, it would perform for her. No matter how hard Hermione tried, she couldn’t bring herself to use the device of her torture. She had sold it back to Ollivander, and paid him an extra 5 galleons to purchase a new one. 

A crackle of thunder caused Hermione's chest to hurt as they worked their way through the forest. They startled a couple of birds nestled in the nearby brush, which caused the feathered creatures to take flight amongst the rain in search for a safer place to weather the storm. After several minutes of silence Hermione took a deep breath and spoke. 

“How do you know about his thinking place?” Hermione asked as she followed the Ravenclaw, trying not to slip in the muddy patches that were taking form as the rain drops started to fall a little faster. 

“I found him here my first year.” Luna called over her shoulder, climbing over a fallen log with ease before turning to offer Hermione a helping hand. Hermione took it, more because it was offered than for actually needing it. “I don’t really remember what I was doing in the forest, but I suspect nargles had something to do with it.” Hermione smiled fondly at the young witch, who in turn smiled back and continued, “He didn’t call me Looney. People thought I couldn’t hear what they called me, but I have always heard the whispers in the corridors. Theo didn’t though, he just nodded at me and then taught me how to talk to them.”

“Them?”

“You’ll see.”

“Have you guys been friends long?” Hermione probed, an odd feeling sticking down in her stomach. It wasn’t jealousy. It was something else she couldn’t put her finger on. Maybe envy. The knowledge that Luna has had more time with Theo, and curiosity at how much Theo had revealed to the other witch. 

“I don’t think he would have called us friends,” Luna explained, skipping slightly around a larger puddle, “but I think he thought it was protecting me. He was always worried about admitting to caring for someone else.” The blond gave her a knowing smile before continuing down the path. 

“Did you know?”

“About you? No, not really. I knew there was someone, but I wasn’t sure who. I found him here after the Yule Ball third year. He was quite beat up that the witch he wanted to take was on the arm of another.” Luna hummed a small tune as a frog hopped across the path in front of her. The blond waved at it happily before almost skipping forward. They walked for several minutes, before finally Luna came to a stop. 

Hermione peered up around the other witches shoulders and was able to just make out the bodies of a herd of thestrals. The dark horse-like creatures had their wings tucked upon their bodies, except for those with foals, whose wings were busy protecting the young-ones from the rain. The sound of rain patting down gently on the leathery wings sounded lightly through the clearing as the creatures peeked up from their positions. They stared for a moment at the witches as they entered the clearing, but once they caught sight of the blond they turned back to their grass and continued munching. Luna raised a single finger to her lips, indicating that they should be quiet as they approached the magical beasts. Hermione nodded and stayed close to her friend as they wove their way in between the adults and the occasional foal. 

“He’s just through there,” Luna sighed as they approached a ring of trees. The trees were tall and broad, their leaves catching the rain as it descended, creating a pouch where you could almost remain dry. Within the trees was a large opening that created a meadow that was at least thirty meters in diameter. There were large sections of grasses blowing gently in a breeze that wove its way through the trees. The grasses were dried, and dead due to the winter weather, but Hermione knew that if it had been spring there would have been thousands of gorgeous flowers that littered the space. Distantly she heard the low roll of thunder as it vibrated through her body. 

“How does he find these places?” Hermione gasped, staring out over the expanse of green in wonder. 

“There are many magical places in Hogwarts, but people avoided this one because it was guarded by the Night Herd.” Luna chirped, one hand patting a nearby foal that had come trotting up. The foal nudged her bag, but dropped its head when Luna shook hers causing her blond tresses to brush Hermione’s shoulder. 

“The Night Herd?” Hermione stared at the thestrals that stood around them. 

“This is the herd of wild thestrals. Not the ones we use to pull the carriages.” Luna grabbed her wand before rolling it gently between her long fingers before turning abruptly. “Well, I am going to go back to the castle. I hear we are having Ham for dinner, and I am quite fond of ham.” 

“Alright,” Hermione started going forward, hearing the slowly disappearing footsteps of the other witch behind her. She peered across the meadow, and soon saw the dark head of hair as it laid propped up against a large stone in the middle of the clearing. He was staring up at the sky as the storm rolled in, his shoulders slumped and his knees pulled up before him so his arms could wrap around them, fingers locked tightly together. The rain began to beat down a little harder as she stared at him, wetting her to the bone as she tried to decide what to do. Taking a deep, calming breath Hermione walked forward. She kept her head down to prevent the rain drops from landing on her eyes, listening to the crunch of the dead grass until she was standing next to Theo. He didn’t turn towards the sounds of her approaching, but she knew that he was aware she was there. His eyes were closed, his head tilted so he faced the sky, precipitation cascading down his face. His hair was wet and his clothes were clinging to him. His oxford was so soaked it was see through, and the scars that littered his chest were presented for her just on the other side of the fabric. 

“Theo?” Hermione was embarrassed of the way his name cracked slightly when she spoke. The worry of him missing, and the relief at having found him working their way through her tired voice. 

“Granger.”

She cleared her throat before she spoke again, “What are you doing out here?”

“Thinking.”

“What about?”

Theo sighed before flicking his eyes over to her. Royal blue, with several walls up. He was nearly as blocked off as she had seen him in his memories. Not quite so robotic, but still very controlled. “The unavoidable.” He closed his eyes before sitting up fully from his rock and standing across from her, his back towards her as he faced out towards the trees. 

“Unavoidable?” Hermione could just catch the letters that had been burned into the stone by magic. AR & CJ. Could it be? Before she could ponder more on it Theo’s voice pulled her attention from the stone and back to him. 

“Yeah, the unavoidable. Like you leaving.” He huffed before taking a couple steps forward. His voice was low, almost a whisper, but he kept his tone steady trudging through the dead grass. He pushed his long fingers through his dark hair as he moved, picking his feet up to keep from getting tangled in the weeds. He turned and smiled as the young Thestral that had made its way into the clearing slipped a little in the mud. It moved towards them, snorting once at Theo before trotting quickly back to it’s mother’s side. 

“What are you talking about Theodore?” Hermione probed gently, walking quickly to keep up with him.

“It’s only a matter of time before you realize who I am. The son of a Death Eater.” He turned slightly so his head was cocked towards her, his hands trembling at his sides. “And not someone like Draco who was forced into it. My father loved being a Death Eater. When you realize who you are with, what being with me is going to be like...you will leave.” He took a deep breath before forcing himself to turn, and look at her completely. He pulled his hand down his face, his anxious tick making an appearance as he huffed a breath out through his nose. His bangs were hanging down in his face, weighted down by the water, which at this point was coming down in near sheets. “How long do I have with you before you can’t stand the whispers that are going to follow us around? How many days do I get to finally hold you,” he took a step forward grabbing her face. “How many minutes do I get to kiss you?” 

He was panting, staring down at her in longing. His eyes never shifting in color. He was Occluding so strongly that she felt like it wasn’t really her Theo. “Lift them. Please…?” She touched his face. He stared at her for several minutes, his eyes bouncing quickly between her brown ones before he finally did as asked. He lifted the walls, with each being pulled away a shade of his eyes lightened. 

“You have forever with me.” She whispered to him in the rain. He shook his head, before pulling away. When he turned back towards her his eyes were the cerulean she had come to associate with sadness. 

“You say that now.” He grunted before pulling a piece of parchment out of his pocket. He handed it to her for her to read. The parchment was worn and yellow, and the ink on it looked suspiciously like blood. “You don’t know what you are agreeing to.” Hermione furrowed her brow before opening up the missive and reading slowly. A charm had been placed on the parchment to prevent it from being wet, and kept the ‘ink’ crisp and clear. 

_ Theodore William Nott, _

_ I have received an interesting piece of information from a mutual friend. Is it true you have taken to publicly dating a Mudblood? Theodore _ , _ my son and heir, you know better than this. She is not worthy of the Nott line, and I would hate to see something happen to her like what happened to the Mudblood your mother was fond of. It would be in her best interest, son, for your relationship with her to end. Before her life does.  _

_ Your ever vigilant Father.  _

  
  


“This is who my father is. A Death Eater. No one outside is going to accept you choosing me. I can’t change that. If I had been braver...If I had left when I had the chance maybe we could have a future-but you...you will leave. I’ll be alone again. With nothing but the memories of the way your hair felt through my fingers to keep me going through the long night.” He had tears going down his face. Hermione glanced up at him before staring back down at the letter. She stared at it until it burst into flames, and then she crossed the distance that Nott had put between them before grabbing his face. 

“I have been looking for you for years.” She sputtered before pulling his face down and kissing him deeply, “I will not lose you. Not now, and not ever.” He whimpered at her, wrapping his arms securely around her waist before pulling her closer. “I know what your father was. I know what he did. I also know who  _ you  _ are Theodore.” Her lips brushed his as she spoke, her hands rubbing up and down his face as she stood there with him in the rain. She shivered but it had nothing to do with the chill. 

“He is  _ nothing _ to you.” She held his jaw stronger until his eyes shifted towards her, she maintained eye contact with him as she rubbed his chin with her thumb. “You are  _ everything  _ to me. Don’t leave me, and I won't leave you.” He nodded slowly lowering his head into her shoulder. She rubbed his back as he cried into her thick, soaked hair. 

“I miss her,” He blurted, his body shaking with sobs as he burrowed into her hair already so wet with the rain, she barely noticed the tears, “I miss her so much sometimes, and it’s his fault she isn’t here. He is going to cause you to leave too. I just know it.” He warned between his cries. Hermione felt her heart break for the boy who lost his mother too soon before whispering comforting words in his ears. 

“He will never cause me to leave, Theodore. You are my happy memory too.” He cried a little more before he pulled back and kissed her fiercely. 

“I love you, Hermione.” Hermione’s heart found a new home in her throat. She stared at his eyes, now her favorite color, as he brushed her wet curls behind her ears. He had never said that string of words to her until this moment, and even though she knew that they were true before, it was something different hearing them said to her. She felt her own tears come as she stared at his pale face. 

“I love you too, Theodore.” He gave her a small grin, his dimple making an appearance as he kissed her again. Both forgetting about the rain. 


	38. Standing Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us, Draco?” Hermione threw a couple of pairs of jeans into her beaded bag while Draco sat against her headboard playing with his bouncy ball. He tossed it into the air while watching her, before heaving himself up and away from the bed, catching the ball as it slowly descended towards them. He was wearing black trousers, and a dark grey satin shirt that clung to his strong shoulders. His hair was perfectly coiffed so it stayed obediently in place. He had an expensive pair of dress shoes, and if Hermione didn’t know better she would have thought he had a date. He stood propped up against one of the posts on her bed, bouncing the ball steadily between them as he waited there. 

“Granger, I’ll be fine. I am going to spend the week with Blaise. He has felt pretty out of the loop this year, and I just don’t want him to feel abandoned.” He bounced the ball twice in quick succession while she dug into her trunk and pulled out a couple of books before sliding them into the bag. “That thing is bloody brilliant.” Draco watched her closely before walking over to finger the material of the purple bag, “You think you could cast a similar spell on my satchel?” 

“Sure, but you have to remember to renew the Feather Light Charm on it, or it becomes a real problem,” Draco nodded in thought, his grey eyes dancing between her and anything else in the room. “Out with it, Malfoy.” Hermione huffed, placing her hands on her hips as she stared at him. He shifted on his feet for several seconds, still avoiding eye contact before finally snatching the ball from its bounce and shoving his hand in his trousers pocket. 

“I just wanted to say that I am glad you and Theo are working out. I think you both deserve to be happy, and I think you could find something great with him.” Hermione smiled up at her blond friend before grabbing the arm that was currently laying limply at his side. She grabbed his larger pale hand and squeezed it. 

“I am happy that we found each other too. _All_ of us.” She crossed the remaining distance between them, standing together with him in her room. He held her hand back, squeezing her tightly as he nodded. He was honestly one of the best friends she had made this year. He was cool and confident, and wanted nothing more than for his friends to have a good life. Really if he hadn’t also had strong senses of cunning and ambition he would have made a pretty good Hufflepuff, but she would be caught impersonating McGonagall as a cat before she told him that. “Where did you even learn about bouncy balls?” She shook her head, breaking the tension as she did another once over through her room to make sure she had packed everything. She found one of her trainers hiding under her bed and tossed it into the bag as she waited for Draco to talk to her. 

“I found them in a Muggle convenience store. The logo said something like…’Bounce so high it's like magic.’” Hermione laughed, causing an aristocratic smirk to spread across his pointy features as he continued, “Of course I had to see what was so great about these little spheres, and found that I really like the way they bounce. It's very...therapeutic.”

“I am going to miss you.” Hermione blurted, “It feels like I am going to be gone for more than a week.” Draco nodded in agreement, before wrapping both of his arms around her neck in a friendly hug. 

“A week, and then I will stick to your side so much that people will question which of the serpents you're sliding under the sheets and sleeping with.”

“I’m not-”

“Shhh...I don’t need to know the sordid details.”

“There are no details!” Hermione pulled back to glare at him, but the cheeky smile he was shooting at her made her roll her eyes. “You already knew that didn’t you.”

“A gentleman never kisses and tells, and Theodore Nott is nothing if not a perfect pure-blooded gentleman.” His grey eyes smiled in mischief, but he grabbed her bag before she could say anything else, and pranced from the room. 

“What about you and Luna?” Hermione asked, propping her hands on her hips as she eyed him carefully, a triumphant smirk tilting the side of her face. 

“What about Lovegood?”

The triumphant smirk Hermione had slowly slipped. She stared at him for several seconds before stuttering, “You-You two have been…”

“Been?” 

“Hanging out. Alone.” Hermione blushed at what she had just implied, looking down at the floor in embarrassment. 

"Yes we have. She has been _helping_ me, I didn’t realize that was something so fascinating.” Hermione stared at him for several moments waiting for him to continue. He shook his head slowly before wrapping her arm into his, “I’ll tell you after Easter, alright Granger? Do you think your big brain can wait that long for answers?” She scoffed, rolling her eyes indignantly. She wanted to argue more, to fight to get the answers that she wanted, but instead she nodded, trusting her friend to tell her when the time was right. He smiled down at her, squeezing her hand from its spot above his elbow. He walked her down towards the front entrance. Once there they met the already packed Theodore, a small suitcase resting at his feet. “If you get too lonely, or if you become bored with Theo’s company you can always write me in that nifty journal you got me for Christmas. I made Theo promise to pack his.” He rubbed the back of her hand slowly in comfort before descending the last of the stairs. 

Harry, Ron, and Ginny had left early that morning, craving Mrs. Weasley’s home cooking for breakfast. It was the only thing that could get the redheads out of bed early. Luna had left about an hour ago, stating that she needed to get going before the rimps began their hourly migration. That had left her and Theo the last of their group to leave, which also limited the goodbyes she would need to say to just the blond currently holding her hand in one of his larger ones as her arm wrapped around his bicep. 

Theo was standing next to the dark skinned Italian wizard that had snatched Draco’s holiday attention. Theo was wearing a pair of dark blue jeans, and a white t-shirt, with a dark grey jacket over the top. His hair was styled loosely so the dark waves fell over his forehead, and he smiled brightly when he saw her and Draco descend the stairs. Zabini on the other hand was wearing a nice charcoal muggle suit with a dark black tie. He also smiled when they approached, but Hermione felt that his eyes were not drawn to her. 

“Sir,” Theodore made a dramatic flair of advancing towards them, his hand extended towards Draco. The brunette wizard then bowed low with an ostentatious flourish, “would you mind if I took this fair creature on your arm with me for the foreseeable future.” Hermione raised her eyebrows at his theatrical actions, but let both boys continue with their dramatics without interruption. 

“What exactly are your intentions with this fair witch?” Draco asked haughtily, turning their bodies so Theo would have to approach him first. Hermione couldn’t help but smile as they spoke. Over the past couple weeks both Theodore and Draco had begun to relax more. Each of them seemed to become more comfortable around the other students, finding their place in the world. This left a gap in what people generally expected of them. They were still collected and cavalier wizards, but more often they were prone to bouts of playful shenanigans. This seemed like one of those days. Hermione realized that Theo had relaxed significantly since the day in the rain. Accepting his future with her. 

“To prove that love still exists in this dark world,” Theo grabbed his heart, his royal blue eyes watching Draco seriously. “And that its power can conquer all, sir.”

“You certainly think highly of yourself, most esteemed suitor.” The blond held firmly to Hermione's hand still wrapped tightly around his upper arm, “But, unfortunately I cannot give you this witch, as she is not mine to give.” Draco nudged her forward, they had drawn a small crowd to their antics, and she was pleasantly reminded of the Weasley Twins, finding that for the first time in almost a year the memory of fiery hair, and devious smirks didn’t cause her hurtling to darkness. “She must choose you, as she is the master of her own heart.” Theo held out his hand expectantly and Draco stood behind her shooting her an encouraging look as she peeked over her shoulder at him. She glanced around at the small crowd, and saw David and several other Slytherins grinning, David’s eyebrows furrowed in clear confusion. Before long there were a couple of encouraging shouts from the small group. Finally, releasing a great sigh she took Theodore’s extended hand. He pulled her close to him before kissing her lightly. 

Then, turning to the group he extended his other arm out to the crowd, “She has accepted. I am a blessed wizard indeed.” There were several laughs and wolf whistles, especially from Blaise who had made his way over to Draco. The crowd slowly dispersed leaving her alone with the three Slytherin boys. Hermione noticed that Draco’s cheeks had pinkened when Blaise had approached him, before the blond nodded his head towards the Italian. She raised an eyebrow, her mouth opened to ask questions regarding the two boys when Theo nudged her. She looked up at him, but he gave her a severe look and shook his head slightly. She nodded, knowing with just that look that this was not something that she should bring up, at least not yet. 

“Ready, Granger?” 

“Actually, I think I need to use the loo before we go.” She glanced one more time at the pair of wizards who were sneaking grins towards each other before hurrying off to the first floor bathroom. The lavatory was rather busy, with several witches trying to relieve themselves before they headed down to the Hogwarts Express. Once Hermione was finished, she walked to the sink washing her hands and splashing some water on her face. She knew she was going to Nott Manor, but the realization of where she was _actually_ going had finally sunk in. She wasn’t really nervous, she knew that nothing would harm her with Theo there, but she was still slightly anxious. This was a Death Eaters house afterall. Once she had wiped her face down with a paper towel she glanced in the mirror and had to stop herself from visibly rolling her eyes. 

“Oh, Granger. I can’t believe you are going to Nott Manor.” Pansy sneered from the spot she was perched on the wall. A couple of the other witches eyed her warily before continuing on with their business. 

“Believe it Parkinson.” Hermione barked, turning on her heel and throwing the paper towels in the bin near Parkinson’s leg. 

“I bet the house spits you out before you enter the door.” Pansy smirked a little while looking down at her fingernails. “You know, Lord Nott never cared for those of _lesser_ blood status. The house might even cause more permanent damage to your...well, not pretty face.” 

“I highly doubt Theo would let me get hurt.” Hermione did roll her eyes this time. One hand carefully grasped her wand in its sleeve holster. Hermione eyed the other witch, careful to notice any movements that might show a threat. There were none, Pansy just continued to lean up against the wall, one foot propped up against the stone so a little too much leg poked out from beneath her robes. 

“Theo? First name basis now? That's interesting, Mudblood.” 

“We don’t use that word here.” A small Hufflepuff first year glared at Pansy where she stood. The little girl had her blond hair braided down her back and had her wand in her hand, looking like she was ready to duel Pansy herself. 

“Stick your pointy nose somewhere else you little twerp.” Pansy’s eyes flashed at the young girl. Her lips pulled slightly over her teeth as she snarled.

“She’s right.” A Ravenclaw girl called from where she was washing her hands. She didn’t look up in the mirror, just dried her hands nonchalantly before turning to face the two eighth years revealing her S.T.A.H.P. button that was securely fastened to her outer robe. Other girls were now standing around slowly staring out at the commotion. “We don’t use that word here. Not anymore.” Pansy looked around quickly. Seeing she was outnumbered, she pushed herself off the wall before lowering herself so she could look Hermione in the face. Even though Hermione was shorter, she had never felt taller. 

“You’ll get what is coming to you. Mark my words.” Pansy flounced away gracefully, storming out of the lavatory. The door closed with a hard _thunk_ as she left. 

“Thank you.” Hermione told the young Hufflepuff witch. The first year was putting her wand away when she looked up at Hermione. 

“Don’t thank me. We stand together now.” The girl nodded once, before skipping from the room. Her blond hair bouncing on her back in it’s single braid as she did. Hermione followed the girl back out to the front hall where Theo, Draco, and Blaise were all chatting. When they saw her they all gave her dazzling smiles.

“Have fun in there?” Theo asked, motioned back towards the bathroom. Hermione rolled her eyes, wondering how many more times she would be forced to make that particular gesture with her face. The boys all gave her chuckles and smirks while she leaned against Theodore’s shoulder. She guessed they saw Pansy leave in a huff. “Ready to go now?” 

She gave Draco one more strong hug before turning back to Nott, “Yes.” Placing a gentle hand on the small of her back Theo led her down the trail to the gates of Hogwarts, just past the anti-apparition barrier. 

“You will have to hold on tight to me to get past the wards, alright?” He moved towards her, wrapping his arm securely around her waist.

“They won't reject me will they? Because of my blood-” 

“No.” Theodore shook his hair, “I’ve already removed all of those wards. It should be just fine. There are only a few still up, the biggest one being the family ward. You can’t get through unless you are entering with someone of Nott blood.” Hermione nodded biting her lip before leaning up on her toes. 

“Three.” She kissed him softly, barely a brush of lips, on his cheek.

“Two.” He nuzzled her nose with his.

“One.” She planted her lips firmly on his as she felt the pull of apparition. She felt like she was being pushed through a tube of toothpaste, but she found that aparating while snogging was her new favorite way to travel. They landed with a solid _thump_ on grass, but they continued to snog mercilessly for several seconds before Theo finally pulled back. She felt the pulse of wards as they stood there. He kissed her one more time before looking down into her bright brown eyes. 

“Ready to see Nott Manor?” He wrapped his arms securely around her waist, clinging to her tightly while nuzzling her neck. Hermione smiled as he kissed her skin, and nodded her head slowly. 

“Yes.” 


	39. Distractions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).  
> Mature Content Ahead: This fanfic was rated M for a reason. Ahead are some MILDLY sexually explicit scenes. Please read at your own risk

“Close your eyes.” Hermione stood in the early evening light, the only view so far being that of Theodore Nott’s chest as he held tightly to her, still lingering close from their apparition. His wand was still in one hand from performing the spell, so he placed it in the front pocket of his dark trousers, waiting patiently for her to follow his order. She pursed her lips, squinting her chocolate eyes in suspicion before acquiescing to his request. She took a deep breath as she closed her eye lids so that the only thing she could see was darkness. Theo held gently to her shoulders, lightly tugging them until he was able to turn her around. “Ok, now you can open.” Hermione blinked a couple times getting used to the bright light of the sun, the view in front of her kicked the air from her lungs causing her to let out an audible gasp. 

She was standing in the shadow of a castle. An _actual_ castle. Not as big or as splendid as Hogwarts, but still a castle nonetheless. The foundation was made of grey stone with at least two towers extending up and reaching towards the sky. The main section of the building had to have been at least four stories tall in some areas. Glancing around she could see old battlements, still standing from where they were constructed hundreds of years ago when they were needed for defense. If she tried, she could imagine archers still preparing to guard against the Norsemen that would have approached from the North Sea. 

The sea itself was just to the left, sparkling brilliant shades of gold and white in the evening light, like the stars had fallen from the heavens and found a new home among its inky dark blue surface. The grass surrounding it was dark green, and soft underfoot, making Hermione feel like she was standing on a springy shag carpet as they walked across the lawn. What really caught her eyes was a beautiful stained glass window that held the Nott family crest, illuminated by brilliant hues of blue and green. The glass shining in the last remaining light of the sun reflected beautifully causing the window to almost glow while she approached the castle. This window was just above a large oaken door, which stood intimidatingly before them. 

“This,” Hermione swallowed heavily, “This is Nott Manor?” Theo laughed heartily at her expression, pulling her gently by the hand. He led her towards the impressive dark wooden door, careful to take their time on the uneven old stone steps.

“Yes this is Nott Manor, or castle,” He gave her a half grin while they walked, looking down at her with fondness reflecting in his eyes. The pair were standing just before the front doors which had to have been at least three meters tall. The dark wood was thick and well worn with age. The knobs themselves were made of brass and looked as old as the castle itself. There was a large silver knocker positioned over one of the wooden doors, shaped like the three heads of a chimera. 

“That’s a pleasant knocker.” Hermione grunted when she finally found her voice again. Nott winced a little while looking down at her from the corner of his eye. Hesitating slightly, he seemed to steel himself, finally reaching out and knocking once using the silver beast. Hermione watched as a small sharp piece of metal extended from the mercurial chest of the creature. Nott grimaced at her before pushing his thumb against the knocker until it drew blood. Hermione stared on in fascination as the door pulsed in magic, ripples of power working their way through the thick wood. She could feel the energy as it ripped through the area around her, before the door swung open. 

“That’s blood magic,” Hermione’s eyes widened in horror, “You still have blood magic here?” Theo nodded while tugging her through the entrance. Hermione felt the magic resist her while he walked through, before finally she felt the spell caress her skin where their hands were linked. At the point where their hands joined the magic pulsed again, Theo cringed tugging her gently through the wards. 

“I know, it's despicable and wrong.” He grunted, setting his suitcase next to the old door, in the large open hallway that was before them. “Unfortunately it's tied into the ley lines of this castle and can’t really be removed.” Hermione stared up at the large entry hall they had just stepped into as Theo continued, “That’s why Voldemort couldn’t use the castle as his base.” Hermione had always been amazed at the way Theo said Voldemort’s name without flinching, and this time she felt the amazement grow into a newfound respect. “He would always need me or my father to allow him in, and he didn’t like being told he couldn’t do what he wanted. Come and go as he pleased and all that.” Theo’s face seemed purple as the light from the stained glass window reflected against his pale skin. 

They were standing in a relatively large hallway that led deeper into the castle. Lining the walls were several paintings narrowing their eyes at Hermione as she approached them, but one look from Theodore and they scurried away. “I may have mentioned that if they ever said anything rude to a witch I brought home I would buy muggle paint thinner.” He gave her a half grin while she shook her head. 

“That.” Hermione scoffed, pointing at him with her index finger, “That is why you were put in Slytherin.” The hall eventually opened up into a large room that had a staircase on either side of the wall. These staircases led to a second floor balcony that she could assume led deeper into the castle. There were doors lining the other sides of the room at this bottom floor. Theo commented that one door led to a formal dining room. He brought her up to the door and opened it revealing a grey stone table that could fit at least twenty people. The stone seemed to match what the rest of the castle was built of, but was obviously polished until the surface reflected like a mirror under the torch light. Several crystal vases were positioned on the polished surface. The vases, however, were currently vacant of flowers, but glittered in the sunlight as it streamed in from the large wall of windows that lined the left side of the room.

Theodore also showed Hermione the downstairs bathroom, and a small study that was positioned just off of the stairs. Hermione was enjoying the little tour they were on and rushed forward to the last door on this floor; at least the last door that she could see without further exploring the rooms already revealed. “Where does this door lead?” Hermione smiled, her pale hand reaching to grab the knob. Theo rushed forward before pulling her hand roughly away from the door. Hermione’s brown eyes stared up at him in consternation before he released a shaky breath and pulled her slowly away from the door.

“You’ve already seen that room.” Theodore slowly turned them both so they were facing away from the worn wood. 

“I have?”

“Yes...in my memories.” Hermione stared up at the Slytherin for a second before realization sank in. She heard herself gasp, unconsciously pulling away from him slightly. Clarity that it had to have been in _that_ room that his mother had passed away caused Hermione's body to tremble gently. He placed a comforting hand on her lower back, leading her towards one of the staircases and away from the lounge. 

“Let’s go see something else, yeah?” He pulled her up the first few steps before she nodded slowly, allowing him to lead her down a long hallway. The tapestries that lined the walls depicted several scenes, mostly involving the conquests of Norsemen as they advanced on an unsuspecting England. The walk to wherever Theo was leading them was long enough that Hermione was able to calm down her racing heart. When they reached another deep brown wooden door, Hermione could see the nerves on Theo’s face. 

He turned the silver knob slowly before opening the door, and allowing Hermione to walk in first. It was his bedroom. The large four poster, situated in the middle of the room was currently sheetless, but was no less impressive. The old bookcases seemed to cry out as they bent under the weight of the many tomes that called the nook their home. There were still a number of brooms lining the walls, but the toy chest was notably still absent. 

After looking around for several minutes, Hermione turned back to see Theodore watching her intently. She gave him a small smile, turning back to continue her scan of the room. She walked slowly towards the wall that held his brooms. She allowed her fingers to trace an early model Firebolt relishing in the feel of the smooth wood as her skin glided across the surface. “Mrs. Weasley never let the boys keep their brooms in the house. Ginny kept hers in her room, but I think that is because Mrs. Weasley knew no one was stupid enough to mess with Ginny’s broom.” Theodore’s deep laugh permeated the room from where he stood. 

“I suspect they would be treated to a good hex if they did.”

“Definitely.” Hermione chuckled. The brooms were like a time capsule of Theodore. There were some models that hovered only a few feet off the ground, and some that were at one time the best brooms on the market. “Was this your idea?” She motioned to the wall as she moved to the next one. 

“Mum’s actually. I threw a fit when I outgrew my first broom and they wanted to take it away,” Hermione heard his feet shuffling behind him, he was readjusting his weight from where he stood, “Mum disenchanted the little broom and mounted it on the wall. She kept doing that until...well until.” Theo grew quiet for a moment, regaining his composure once he began speaking again, “I kept doing it. Disenchanting them and mounting them on the wall. Just one thing to keep her here, you know?” He had moved up towards Hermione, his pale hand reaching over her shoulder to touch the bristled end of one of the old brooms. Hermione inhaled his scent as it surrounded her. Allowing it to quell the shaky feeling that had taken root when he had begun talking about Alcea.

Taking a deep breath the Gryffindor swiveled back around and placed her hands on the strong chest of the Slytherin. She wanted to distract him, at least for a moment. To create some new good memories in a room that contained plenty of bad ones. She felt more at home than she had in ages, and there was something about being alone with this man in his room, that caused her body to tingle with anticipation. “What did you have planned for us this week, Lord Nott?” Hermione whispered, a coy smile tugging at her lips. He glanced down at her when her hands roughly grabbed the collar of his jacket. She tugged him down, more forcefully than necessary, so they were both at her eye level. 

“Suddenly I can’t remember,” He grinned back at her, his eyes flicking towards her lips quickly. Not needing any more prompting she kissed him, relishing in the way his tongue sought out hers. It was like his tongue belonged there, tangled together with hers as they each tried to devour the other. His hands held on tightly to her waste so that he could pull her ever closer while her fingers grasped and folded into the soft fabric of his jacket. They kissed for several moments before he pulled back, his eyes reflecting her favorite color. 

“Ok,” He breathed against her lips, his forehead resting on hers, “I feel completely taken advantage of, Granger.” She laughed. “I have to talk to a lawyer tomorrow, but other than that...anything you want to do this week is possible. Fuck, if you want to fly to New York tomorrow I’ll make it happen.” His nose touched her gently before he started kissing her again. He only got a few seconds of kisses before his words sank in and she pulled back from his lips.

“A lawyer?” Hermione pushed him gently so she could look him in the eyes, “What for?” 

“I-I just have some things I need to take care of.” He avoided her gaze, pulling back and staring off at the window, his eyes reflecting the now setting sun. “Can you just trust me on that?” Hermione stared up at him for a few seconds. There were a number of different things he could need a lawyer for, and honestly none of them seemed like pleasant conversation. Nott was afterall the son of a Death Eater. Being head of household certainly created its own brand of issues as well. She felt her head nodding slowly, her curls bouncing steadily on her head. 

“I love your hair,” Nott commented before dipping his head to rest on her shoulder, gently pushing against her until he was practically tangled within her long, soft coils. He nipped lightly at her neck, and the spot just below her ear before blowing warm air on her skin. 

“Theo,” Hermione sounded breathless, releasing a low moan. Her knees weakened, causing her to lean forward on Nott with more pressure than she originally intended. Instead of pushing her back he reached down. His hands, which had previously been on her waist, descended until they were around her thighs, yanking her firmly up until she was positioned against him. Hermione wrapped her legs around his waist, causing Theo to give her a smug smirk before he returned to his original goal of marking her neck. He crossed the room quickly backwards, until the back of his knees touched the bed. He dropped down onto the mattresses surface, readjusting them so they were sitting comfortably, her legs straddling his.

“Granger,” He growled, pulling back from her neck. He inspected his work with an approving look, turning back to her with a wink, “Mind if I distract you for a bit?” She didn’t need to be tempted, but the lascivious look he gave her, and the glint in his eye was enough to make her lean in to kiss him heatedly. His hands worked gently along her shirt until he was tugging at the hem, eventually sending the fabric sailing across the room. He lowered his face down to her chest, kissing the top of her breasts, marking one of them with a love bite at her encouraging sounds.

“Sounds good to me, Nott.” She breathed, his fingers nestling deep into her hair to keep her close. He pulled her bra down slightly, taking a nipple into his mouth before biting gently causing a whimper to escape her lips. 

“Sounds good to me, too.” 


	40. Traditions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

“So, what is going on with Draco and Zabini?” Hermione’s voice floated easily among the room until it collided with the blue walls. They had spent the last couple hours in bed, after he had found some clean sheets in the closet and placed them on the plush mattress. She had offered to help him make it, but he had rejected her attempts of assistance. Theodore shifted slightly so he could look at her better, his fingers tracing up and down her arms leaving a trail of goosebumps wherever they touched. He took a deep breath through his nose before rolling over onto his side and rested his head onto his propped hand so that he was gazing down at her.

“What do you know about pure-blood customs?” Theo asked her quietly. He leaned down slightly and kissed her temple before pulling back and watching her intently. She thought for a moment that he might be deflecting from the question, but decided to play along. If for some reason this did not answer her question she could always ask it again. She took a second to gather her thoughts before speaking. 

“Um, could you be more specific? There are a lot of them.” Theo nodded, quirking his mouth to the side in contemplation before moving his head back and forth as if carefully weighing his next words in his head. 

“Marriage customs, specifically.” He settled on as he continued to watch her, his blue eyes reflecting the seriousness of the conversation. Hermione gazed at him for a couple of moments, taking in his appearance while allowing what he asked to sink in. The firelight danced across his features as he continued rubbing up and down her arms, leaving him in a golden glow. He was gorgeous, and this gorgeous man just asked her about marriage customs. She could feel the warm blush as it worked its way up her cheeks, sputtering a few times and clearing her throat before she spoke. 

“Ok, well...I-I know that usually the witch has to provide a dowry, and that the wizard gets to pick her, unless she is considered to come from higher breeding.” Hermione began slowly watching as Nott nodded along with her observations. She couldn’t stop the indignant quality her voice took on in response to the reference to the quality of breeding. “I also read that contracts are usually drawn to indicate the number of heirs that the witch is expected to bear before birth control can be in place, and possible name restrictions. For example the Black family always specified celestial names.” Hermione heard the swotty tone her voice had begun to take on, but still she continued, “Witches can include specific expectations the husband is to maintain, such as a job of a specific standard, or even hired help…” Hermione trailed off as Theodore raised his hand to prevent her from continuing. 

“Those are all astute observations,” Theodore commented dryly, “What if the wizard doesn’t want a witch. What then?” He looked away until he was staring out the large window on his side of the bed. 

Hermione shook her head and shrugged her shoulders to indicate that she was unsure. The few books she had read regarding pure-blood customs had not mentioned the possibility of a wizard not choosing a witch. She had always assumed that it had never come up, but now thinking about Draco and Blaise, she could feel the confusion work its way into her mind. What  _ if _ the wizard didn’t choose a witch?

“They marry a witch anyway.” Theo forced the words out, his jaw tense and his shoulders locked in place. “For centuries they married a witch anyway. They have to keep the name going, right? The only way to do that is to bite down on the part of you that loves someone else and to marry a witch and to have an heir.” Theo sighed deeply, a thick sadness filled his rumbling voice as he continued, “Draco has been hiding a portion of himself for years because of this.” He looked back at her, his eyes filled with pain for his best friend. “I asked Draco about it once. When I watched him stare at Zabini while we were flying over the lake at his house. I knew that look…” He trailed off, his eyes looking at her intently. “It was the same way I looked at you.” Nott sat up suddenly, the sheets falling to pool around his waist, his scarred chest seeming to glow in the firelight, each inch of raised flesh gleaming in the warm light. He pulled his knees up and rested his forearms on them, his jaw clenching in the dark room. 

“He cried when I brought it up. He thought I was going to tell his father. That I would betray him. ‘It doesn’t matter, anyway’ he said, ‘I won’t live past the war’.” Hermione stared at Nott as he re-lived his best friend's terror, the fear still evident in his eyes, “He had taken the mark at this point. Do you know what he said next?” Hermione shook her head as she sat up. She reached out tentatively, putting her arm on Theo’s strong shoulders. He didn't really seem to notice, he just continued to stare at the flames. “ ‘Zabini won’t want me when he sees this thing on my arm’.” Theo shook his head, his dark curls bouncing slightly against his head. “I have been trying to get him to see past all of this for years. But I could never get him to take that chance. He was stubborn like me in that way.” They sat in silence for a couple of moments, each breathing slowly in the darkness of the room. Hermione sat still, her eyes dancing around the room as thoughts echoed quickly in her mind. Finally, she voiced the one question that had been aching to be answered since she had seen Zabini and Draco stand together. 

“Wait!” Hermione shook her curls until they fell loosely over one shoulder. She fingered the sheet where it gathered around her, chewing delicately on her lip. “Why were you so jealous of Draco then?”

Nott smirked down at her for a moment before shrugging, “He likes witches too. He just...loves Blaise. I thought maybe Draco had given up on him, or that he finally realized how beautiful you are.” Theo lifted her hand to kiss the palm before wrapping her fingers around his.

“What changed?” Hermione prompted quietly, keeping her gaze on his profile. The light casting part of his face in shadow. Theo rolled his eyes slightly before looking at Hermione from the corner of his eye, his white teeth flashing in the firelight. 

“Luna.”

“Luna?” Hermione scoffed, staring back at Theo. He turned to look at her fully then, his face turned in a half grin.

“She has a way of making you see something you didn’t already realize. That day you found me in the forest, she went back and spoke with him. She told me afterward that she had explained you can’t control who you love. She told him that no matter who he ended up with he would always have a friend in her.” Theo’s grin stretched a little bigger, and his eyes sparkled with a fondness for the blonde witch. “I don’t even know how she realized that Draco was in love with Zabini. Malfoy came to me that night, when you were asleep. He asked me if I thought he should go for it. If I would be there for him if he did.” Theo squeezed her hand as he spoke, “I told him that no matter who he chose to be with, my respect for him wouldn’t change.” 

“Neither would mine,” Hermione assured Theo as he gazed at her. He nodded before kissing her on the cheek, pulling him closer to his chest. 

“Good.” He grunted before pulling her back down in a long kiss. “What do you want to do tomorrow? After my meeting?” She rubbed her hands through his hair until she received a low noise of contentment from the back of Theo’s throat. 

“You promised to take me sailing.” She chirped matter of factly, scratching his scalp with her nails until he groaned. 

“I was really hoping you would say you wanted to stay in bed.” She giggled, actually giggled, as she stared up at his forget-me-not eyes. They had remained that color since the previous day when they had kissed in his room. Almost a full twenty-four hours.

“Maybe afterward.” He kissed her deeply, cutting off any words that would have continued from her lips before pulling back, and wrapping the satin sheet back over them. The room was warm enough with the fire so they didn’t need a large blanket. 

“Deal.”   


* * *

Nott had fixed Hermione breakfast in the morning. Waking her was the easy part, getting her to actually leave the comfort of the bed was the more difficult task. He had coaxed her with the promise of delicious food and kisses, the latter which she greedily took every few steps towards the kitchen. They passed through the formal dining room on their way to the kitchen, crossing through large pale double doors that swung in both directions. The room itself was large and stocked with groceries. There was a small breakfast nook tucked away in a corner, with large and pristine black cabinets lining the walls. She had sat on the pale stone countertop making conversation with him as he cooked for her. It wasn’t anything special, just some scrambled eggs and some toast, though the eggs were slightly over salted, and her toast was a tad on the burned side. Still, he made her tea the way she liked it which made up for the other breakfast catastrophes. 

She was busy teasing him for his cooking skills when he reprimanded her for not eating like a proper human. She had been nibbling her toast precariously over her plate which was balanced in one hand, not wanting to leave him alone at the stove. He had helped her down, and shooed her to the nook, a slight smack on the bum making her scamper over to the table. After Hermione had taken several bites she realized what was missing in a manor of this size. 

“Where are the house elves?” She took a sip of her tea in order to try and convey a nonchalance she wasn’t feeling in regards to the question, her own uneasiness about working house elves wiggling its way into her gut. Nott looked up at her from his place next to the stove. He had just finished making his toast and was scooping eggs out of his pan, a dish cloth flung over one bare shoulder, his sleep pants slung low on his hips. He brought his dish over to the table and scooted in across from her.

He looked over his plate at her, shrugging slightly, “I freed them.” He took a sip from his mug, blue eyes gazing at her from over the rim, watching her reaction. 

She had toast hovering right before her mouth, having not moved it since he had spoken. “Why?” 

“You saw the way my father was with me?” Theo waited until Hermione nodded hesitantly before he continued, “He was worse with them. The only one that wanted to stay was Hompa, and she only wanted to stay because she was my nurse elf and didn’t want me alone.” He shrugged slightly before flicking his eyes back to Hermione, “She still brings food for me when she knows I will be home. But she lives with another wizarding family now. She’s happy. The family just had a baby.” He smiled slightly, loss clear in his eyes.

“I am sure she loves you very much.” Hermione reached across the space, holding his hand for a second. 

“Yeah,” He coughed, clearing his throat before turning glancing back up at her. “What did your family typically do for Easter?” Hermione allowed the change of subject, not wanting their week to be bogged down with sad memories, she rolled her eyes to the sky before smirking back at him. 

“You mean what do Muggles typically do?” Hermione took another bite of her eggs, relishing in the salty taste. Theodore shrugged slightly, avoiding her gaze as he took another long sip of his tea. 

“Sure, Granger. What do Muggles do?” 

“We dye eggs.” Hermione watched Theodore, waiting for his reaction. She was not disappointed. Theo scrunched his eyes in confusion, his tea cup held in one hand as he tried to work out what exactly she had said. 

“Dye?”

“Yeah,” She chuckled at the questioning tone that he shot her way. “We use a type of dye that makes hard boiled eggs turn different colors. Some people also hide eggs around their yards with candy in them.”

“How do you get candy inside a hard boiled egg?” Theo wondered aloud, his brow furrowed even more, clearly trying to work out the logistics of sticking candy inside of an egg without magic. 

“Oh, no we uh...we use plastic eggs to put the candy in. We eat the dyed ones.” Hermione tried to clarify, taking another bite of her toast, quickly washing the burnt flavoring from her tongue with tea. She hoped he didn’t realize how quickly she was sucking down her tea after eating the toast. He seemed to be too confused about the Easter traditions to notice. 

“Well, you will just have to show me these things on Easter because right now it sounds...well it sounds crazy.” Hermione laughed at that. She readily agreed to show him all the ways that Muggles celebrate Easter during the week. The conversation eventually moved on to their potions project, as they were going to finish brewing it once they returned from break. Theodore was telling her a story about the first time Draco and he tried to brew a potion at home when his blue eyes suddenly left her chocolate ones, flicking quickly towards the door. 

“Someone is at the exterior wards.” Theo whispered quietly. Hermione found it fascinating the way he could feel the wards while remaining on the property. She found herself studying the way his head tilted, leaning side to side while sensing the person at his wards. “They are poking at them with their wand.” He cocked his head sideways one more time before nodding and looking up at her, 

“That would be the lawyer.” He grunted, standing slowly, his breakfast barely touched. “Granger, do you think you could wait for me to be finished? I won't be too long.” He offered her his hand, which she accepted before standing up behind him. He waved his wand, a shirt zipping down from his room and landing gracefully next to him. He threw the long sleeved henley over his head and tugged the hem down around his hips, not bothering to throw on actual trousers. 

“Sure, where do you want me to wait?”

He shrugged his shoulders before escorting her through the formal dining room to the front hall. “Anywhere, well anywhere except…” His eyes floated to the room that he had forced her to avoid the previous night. “Actually, there might still be some dark magic in other rooms too. I hate to ask this, but can you stay in my bedroom until I am done?” 

“Yeah, maybe you have a book I haven’t read yet.” 

“I am sure you will be able to find something. I have several first editions you might appreciate as well.” Hermione’s eyes lit up in excitement. She waved to him over her shoulder quickly, scurrying up the stairs to take advantage of the books lining his walls. She heard Nott’s throaty chuckle as she scampered down the hallway, but rolled her eyes unwilling to admit that his laughter was the real reason for her grin as it spread across her face. 


	41. Finding Comfort

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating). 
> 
> Mature Content Ahead: This fanfic was rated M for a reason. Ahead are some sexually explicit scenes. Please read at your own risk

Hermione woke deep into the night before Easter Sunday in a cold sweat. She had been having a nightmare, though at the moment she couldn’t remember what the nightmare had been about. She reached across the expanse of soft, satin, sheets to find Theo’s side cold. The past few days Theo had been perfectly reliable to hold her through the night, even refusing to let her up to use the restroom on occasion. Now he was absent, and Hermione found she didn’t like that development. Rising from the bed, she found one of his shirts on the floor and threw it over the forest her curls were making, covering her bare body from the draft that flitted through the castle. Her bare feet felt chilled against the wooden flooring. She wandered through the castle, nodding occasionally to sneering portraits, who looked down at her with narrowed eyes from their frames. She lit her wand in a small  _ Lumos _ , moving slow to keep her steps quiet as she worked her way through the halls. 

The past few days they had shared in the castle had been wonderful. Theodore had taken her sailing after his meeting with the lawyer as promised. After their sailing trip, they had ventured into a nearby wizarding community where there had been a used and rare book store named Tholin’s Odd Pages that he figured she would love. He was right. They had spent the rest of the afternoon curled up in moth-eaten armchairs reading old books that the ancient wizard had gotten in recently. Theo bought a couple that she had refused to relinquish, waving goodbye to the storekeeper who smiled on at them in a knowing way. 

They had also spent a lot of time exploring the castle and grounds, though she had to promise not to wander into any unknown rooms until Theo could hire a curse breaker to come and check out the old areas. Hermione had suggested hiring Bill Weasley, which Theo had readily agreed to. Two days after her suggestion, Bill was in Nott Manor with a team of Curse-Breakers exploring the old castle for dark magic that needed to be removed. While the workers wandered the old rooms, Theodore had taken to sitting with Hermione and playing a game of wizards chess, which she lost spectacularly. Bill’s team had found a couple of nasty pieces of magic, especially in the Master Bedroom, and in William’s old study. They had promptly removed them, which Theo had thanked Bill for. With the castle now-relatively- dark magic free, Hermione was encouraged to explore wherever she liked, but she often returned to Theodore’s room where she curled up with books, tea, and thick blankets, nestled deeply in an old armchair he had moved into the room for her. 

These events were great and would have been enough to make a wonderful Easter break, but they didn’t even include the way he had made her feel nearly every night. He was intent on making her call out his name in pleasure every chance he got. This meant that as soon as darkness fell he had lowered himself between her legs and had-on occasion-slide fingers into her inner body. She had returned the favor with him on occasion, but they had yet to completely have  _ true,  _ honest to Merlin intercouse. She knew he was waiting for her full permission, which she had nearly given on several occasions. She also knew it was only a matter of time, and was secretly excited and a little fearful for when that moment came.

That led Hermione to tonight, where she was currently descending one of the large staircases towards the small light in the room which had previously remained closed except to Bill's team. The room that held Nott’s worst memories. She crept closer to the door which was cracked open slightly, allowing a thin silver light to float out into the entrance hall. Hermione pushed the wood gently until it opened up enough for her to see in. 

Theodore was standing in front of a large fireplace, his back currently towards the door that had opened without so much as a creak. He was still wearing his usual pajama’s of a pair of grey sleep pants, and no shirt. He was staring up at a large painting, framed in golden filigree and designs. What struck Hermione as odd, was that the painting did not move. Her breath caught as she crept closer to get a better look and noticed that the witch depicted in the frame was none other than Alcea Nott. 

“She was so much more beautiful than what this painting shows.” Theo murmured. He hadn’t turned around, but spoke quietly as if he could feel Hermione’s presence once she had entered the room. His dark wand was held tightly in one hand, the only light in the room emanating from its tip. Hermione hesitated for a second before moving closer to him, setting her wand down on one of the end tables when she got closer so that she could wrap her arms freely around his waist. “The bastard didn’t even have the artist infuse the painting with her memory. He told his friends it would be too painful to see her and talk to her so soon after her death.” Theo’s shoulders shook in either rage or sadness, not being able to see his face, Hermione couldn’t tell which, so she just held him tighter. “He just wanted to hurt her one final time. He wanted to hurt me.” Theo maintained his eye contact with the painting before touching it gently with one hand. 

“I can’t even talk to her anymore. And her memory has faded so much that the infusion charm won't take if I try it.” She felt something wet on her hand and knew immediately that he was crying. 

“What would you tell her, Theo?” Hermione whispered from her place behind him. He took a shaky breath. 

“I would tell her that I’m sorry.” His voice cracked at the edge of the sentence. “I would tell her I’m sorry for saying his name.” Hermione recalled the way his father had become furious at hearing Theodore’s imaginary friend named Caiden. “I would te-tell her that I am so so-sorry she couldn’t trust her son with her secret. That-That I hope she could find it in herself to fo-forgive me.” Hermione held him tighter as his shoulders began to shake with his tears. 

“She forgives you, Theo.” Hermione declared into the night air. She felt him shake his head, so she moved until she was standing in front of him. “She does. Do you want to know how I know that?” Hermione stared up at him until he looked at her, his eyes pleading as the tears raced down his pale cheeks, the light of his wand holding strong. “Because, I would have forgiven you, and she was a stronger woman than I will ever be.” Theo released another sob before nodding slightly, his eyes flicking up towards the painting of his mother before lowering his head to Hermione. 

“I love you,” He breathed as his head rested against hers, their foreheads touching in the darkness of the room.

“I love you,” She replied. She reached up so that her hands rested on his face, her thumbs rubbing absently on the angles of his pale cheeks.

He kissed her then. Slowly. His tears mixed where their lips met in a salty sweet embrace. It continued on in this leisurely pace, almost lazily as they gently introduced their tongues into the caress of lips. Theo brought his hands from his side to wrap around her hips. Distantly Hermione heard the clatter of his wand clattering onto the floor before he pulled her up against him. Her mind became fuzzy. Thoughts flitted through her mind in terrifying speed. Thoughts of her love for him, and the way his soft skin felt under her hands. Hermione felt him pick her up and carry her out of the room, his lips never leaving hers as he continued to kiss her. Her legs wrapped around his hips, her hands found their way into his wavy hair, fingers tugging gently on his dark locks. She moved her lips from his, to his neck when she felt him begin to make his way up the stairs. Nibbling on his soft skin, until he grunted pushing her gently up against the wall at the top of the long staircase, propping her between his body and the stone. His hands, freed from where they were holding her waist moving up to her hair where they tangled into her long tresses. Her fingers glided to his soft chest where she gently scratched down the hard planes that made up his body. He groaned into her hair, and she felt him harden beneath where her hips met his. 

She sucked gently on his neck, and felt him move them again towards his bedroom. Before she realized what was happening she felt her back hit the mattress. His dark figure loomed over her for a moment, and then he was descending on her in a fury. He propped himself up on his arms above her, one of his long legs sliding in between her thighs. “Theo-Are you sure you are up to-”

“Please, Hermione. I need you.” He stared down at her from his perch above. Shakily Hermione nodded her head. She knew he wouldn’t go too far without her consent. That right now he just needed the physical closeness that came with being with someone else. That he needed the comfort someone could only find in the touch of another person. At the same time she knew she was ready for so much more with him. She knew that tonight, there would be no taking it back, and the thought filled her with a flutter of anticipation and not fear. She nodded again with more confidence before pulling his face back down to hers. She kissed him slowly again, as his fingers worked their way up her thighs, pushing his shirt above her head, tossing the fabric back down to the floor. He kissed her chest, paying special attention to her pert nipples, nipping them softly until she noises crept unbidden from her mouth. 

Hermione’s moans spurred Theodore on, his hips rocking gently on hers until he stopped nipping her breasts and continued lower. He licked his way down her chest, circling her belly button before bringing his mouth back down to her center. She swore in her head, the words working past her lips in nothing more than a primal groan. Theodore’s tongue worked her from his place at her core. She made a mental note to ask him if he would prefer to live down there, breathy laughs escaping her as she thought that he seemed to favor this position. He licked down her, kissing each section of her body, making her cry out sharply in pleasure. Needing something to do with her hands, she reached down to tug lightly on his hair the way she knew Theo liked. He pushed into her greedily, licking intently while she forced out his name. He growled roughly at the sound of her name on his lips, increasing his speed and variations until she shattered below his tongue. He smiled sweetly up at her before moving to lay beside her. Before he got under the sheets Hermione grabbed his arms and prevented him from leaving. 

“Please, Theo. Don’t stop.” She begged maintaining eye contact in hope that he would understand what she was asking without her having to say it.

He glanced down at her before nodding slowly and lowering his pants down his legs. He was fully aroused, and grabbed himself in his hand, stroking down his length a couple of times in preparation. Slowly, keeping eye contact with her, he lowered himself back to the bed. The only light she could see was from the moon, and wished she hadn’t forgotten her wand downstairs so she could light the fire to see him better. The moon was nearly full though, and allowed enough silvery light to come in that she could clearly see the anticipation written across his face. 

“You sure, Granger?” Theodore’s deep voice was thick with lust. His eyes sparkled in the pale light, never breaking eye contact from where he held her steady under his gaze. Theodore waited patiently for her answer, the same way he always waited for her. Patiently, like he had all the time in the world for her to answer. 

“Yes, Theodore.” Hermione’s voice came out breathy, but no less confident. Theo gave her that crooked grin, revealing his lone dimple. He kissed her gently before lowering a hand down and guiding himself towards her. Theo rubbed himself through her center, coating himself thoroughly with the wetness that had begun to leak from her. 

“This may hurt, love. I’ll try to go slow.” Hermione nodded again, unable to find her voice as he slowly pushed into her. It did hurt a little. A slight pinch followed by a pulling on her insides. A stretch that was uncomfortable more than painful, as he inched into her bit by bit. She whimpered a little, too emotionally invested to prevent it from escaping her lips. Theo nodded before whispering into her hair, “I know, I'm sorry, Hermione.” He kissed her cheeks holding himself still above her. She looked up at him, the struggle to remain stationary evident on his face in the light of the moon. He huffed out a couple of breaths in quick succession, clinging to his control while he waited for her to adjust. 

When the slight pain had receded she reached up and touched his face. His eyes, which had scrunched up in his struggle, opened wide looking down at her. They seemed to glow in the night, their color more brilliant than she could imagine. The forget-me-not reflecting in the moonlight as he gazed down at her. She nodded up at him. Theo kissed her lightly, exploring her mouth while his body began to move. She felt him pull in and out, his hips thrusting slowly so that she could feel every inch of him inside of her. He kissed every part of her face, before locking eyes with her again. As Theodore stared down at her, she felt every ounce of love she had for him reflected back, and then more. He watched her while he moved, gaining pleasure from hers. 

When her mouth opened and she began to moan again, she watched his face scrunch while he tried to remain in control, his composure nearly breaking at the soft sound of her voice. Hermione didn’t make it easy for Theo, allowing each sound to escape her parted lips unbridled. It didn’t take long for him to begin to moan with her, his resolve finally cracking. Their voices echoing together in perfect harmony, a symphony of pleasure as they moved with each other in a long ago choreographed dance. Theodore’s movements became more stuttered when he became closer to his peak. In desperation he moved a hand between them, his fingers rubbing across the bundle of nerves that was wet with her body's own fluids. Theodore quickly sat up, adjusting his hips slightly so that his cock drug across that place his fingers had found all those nights ago deep inside her. Hermione cried out as his body found another strong rhythm. His words fell from his lips in broken exclamations, “You are so beautiful...so wet...so good...I love you…” 

Theo’s voice continued on until his words became more disjointed. The only thing that made sense to her ears in the haze of pleasure was the last sentence. “I love you, Hermione.” She gasped at his words before releasing around him. At the feel of Hermione’s orgasm as it encompassed him, fluttering on all sides of his length, Theo fell over too. He wrapped an arm underneath Hermione’s back, another grabbed roughly onto one of her thighs. Theo leaned down into her while he gasped for breath, his own cries reverberating off of her chest. He continued to shoot his release inside her, while Hermione proceeded to ride her own orgasm out, her hips rocking of their own volition.

As they both came down from their post-orgasmic high, the only sound in the room was their gasping breaths. Theo lifted his head from her chest, and began to press kisses to her sweaty neck. Slowly, Theodore continued to kiss her, murmuring sweet gibberish while Hermione tried to catch her breath. She smiled at him when she noticed he was still trying to maintain his position above her on shaky arms. Hermione eventually pushed his arms gently until he collapsed on top of her, laying his head sideways on her collarbone. “I love you too, Theodore.” She whispered, moving her fingers through his dark hair, and down his sweaty back. They fell asleep like that. Him on top of her as they found comfort within each other's embrace. 

* * *

That next morning they slept in, ignoring the Post Owl's incensent pecking at the window of Theodore’s room in favor of the safety of their sheets. Hermione even burrowed deeper into the bed, enjoying the comfort of being surrounded by Theodore’s warmth and scent. Eventually the blasted bird left the mail in the cubby positioned outside the kitchen window before flying off into the morning clouds. They had no way of knowing how important that particular Easter issue of the Daily Prophet was. 

At around ten in the morning Theodore shot up in bed as if he had cold water splashed along his back. Hermione, ever the war veteran, shot up as well, lightly touching his arm as the Slytherin stared intently at the window on his side of the room. “Theo, what is it?” She hesitantly asked, pulling the sheet up against her naked chest. The memories from last night flooding her mind as she positioned herself so she was sitting on bended knees. 

“Someone just entered the wards.” He croaked. He leaned his head to the side before he started to shake violently. “They-they have activated the blood wards.” Before Hermione had time to register what he had said, Theo jumped out of bed and grabbed his sleep pants. He roughly shoved his legs through the holes as quickly as he could, jumping at the end to pull them over his hips. 

“But...but you said-” Hermione sputtered, her brown eyes following him while he charged across the room looking for a shirt. Theodore did a quick circle before growling in frustration, violently picking up the shirt Hermione had worn last night, throwing it quickly over his head. 

“I know.” He roared abruptly, turning back towards her and letting out an audible sigh. He lowered his voice as he looked at her with an expression a mixture of pain and fear. “I know what I said.” Theo came back to the bed, pulling Hermione into a fierce hug, clinging tightly to her slender shoulders. He pushed her back slightly, making eye contact, his eyebrows scrunched in panic. Theodore’s blue eyes jumped between her chocolate ones several times before he choked out whispered words that made her stomach drop out of her body. “He’s here.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N Thank you so much to everyone who has taken the time to comment. Your comments have been wonderful, and I can honestly say that they have made me feel more confident about my writing. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and will see you all Sunday!


	42. Bittersweet Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING: This chapter contains mentions of torture. Please read ahead at your own risk.

Hermione felt her heart stop for several moments. The sound of the waves crashing violently on the ocean echoed in her ears while she tried to comprehend what Theodore just said, but the words didn’t seem to make sense. _He’s here._ The sentence echoed in her head on repeat, like a CD that had a scratch. The vowels and consonants created an image of a man who looked just like Theo only older, with a menacing gleam in his blue eyes. Her breath came quickly as the words continued to float around her head, never stopping long enough for her to grab hold of them. She was barely aware of warm hands as they grabbed her face and made her look into pale blue eyes. “Granger? Granger, please look at me.” She shook her head once, clearing the terror as her logic began to take over. 

“Theo.” The sound was weak, and thick with fear. Theodore’s face relaxed infinitesimally, releasing a breath between pursed lips. 

“Alright, stay with me.” The relief that poured from Theodore's voice was palpable, his hands rubbed up and down her bare arms while the rest of the room began to take focus in her eyes. 

“The brooms,” Hermione began, launching herself off of the comfortable bed, where just hours before she had felt safer than any other time in her life. She raced across the room, digging in the closet until she found a pair of dirty jeans, yanking them over her hips so quickly they caused small abrasions on her skin. She threw on a long sleeved shirt, glancing up at Theo when the silence continued uninterrupted other than her pale feet padding on the floor. She walked across the room towards the mounted broomsticks when the pain in his eyes caused her feet to lock in place. He gently shook his head. 

“They’re un-enchanted.” Theo whispered weakly. 

“Then we enchant them!” Hermione screeched, looking around quickly for her wand. The memories of last night came roaring back into her head, and she whimpered slightly meeting his sad eyes. “My wand…”

Theodore nodded, blinking several times and crossed the room to her in three long steps. “Mine is downstairs too.” He murmured, taking her head in his hands and lowering his forehead to hers. “We can’t make it out of here.” His breath tickled her face, the words bouncing off her round cheeks. “At least not together.” She raised her eyes to him, searching his face while what he suggested sunk into her mind.

“No.” Hermione’s voice sounded strong, stronger than she thought possible considering the circumstances. “I won't leave you here.” She gripped his wrists, his hands still clinging to her face. His fingers began rubbing small lines on her cheeks. His mouth was drawn in a small frown as he watched her process all the options. “I can’t.”

“You have to,” Theodore’s voice was steady. “I can handle him. I can survive. But if he finds you here…” Theodore trailed off. Leaving the ending open for her interpretation. 

“What if you need help.” Hermione argued, pulling her face from his hands. She stood back, her arms thrown at her side, trying desperately to get him to run with her. Her hair stood nearly on end, crackling with magic as she ran through different scenarios, trying to find one where they both could get away. They were on the fourth floor so jumping out a window was not an option, but there had to be a way for them to escape together. 

“Listen closely Hermione, we don’t have much time.” Theo glanced over his shoulder as if he expected his father to burst forth at any moment, though it had only been a couple minutes since they had awoken. He grabbed both of her smaller hands in his, and held them close to his chest as he rambled quickly, his words tumbling over each other in a rush to escape his throat. “He can sense I am here. It's part of the blood ward. But he doesn’t know you are. Once I leave this room I want you to wait for five minutes. That should give me time to...distract him.” Theo grimaced slightly before shaking his head and turning back to her. “Once I have, I want you to go through the front door as quietly as you can. Do you remember where the broom shed is?” He asked her quickly, she nodded and he continued without missing a beat, “Good girl. Take a broom and you go _straight_ to the Ministry. It should take you about three hours to get there. Let the Minister know he is here. I can survive that long.”

“But-But they can’t get through the wards.” Hermione countered. Her heart was beating so fast in her chest she was sure it was going to crack her ribs. 

“No they can’t, but my father will be distracted when they get here long enough for me to run.” Theo grabbed her shoulders roughly, smothering her in a quick hug. 

“And if he’s not? If you can't?” Hermione demanded, Theodore pulled back and looked down at her, a small smirk on his tired face. 

“It will be fine, Granger.” Theo pulled her up into a long kiss. He kissed her fiercely, pouring his heart into his lips and his tongue. He tangled his hand in her hair, fingers running gingerly through her long curls as if memorizing every twist before one hand wrapped around her neck and held her tightly to his mouth. She knew that he was kissing her like it was the last time, and a part of her buried deep was scared that it just might be. So, she clung to his shoulders, and gripped his hair. Committing every inch of his face and the feel of his skin on hers to her impressive memory. 

“You have to come back to me.” Hermione whimpered when he slowly pulled away. “You have to.” Theo shuddered, but nodded his head quickly, knocking their foreheads together.

“Anything for you, Granger.” He kissed her one more time. Sucking gently on her bottom lip, clinging tightly to one of her hands. When he pulled away he kissed her palm, holding her fingers until he stepped far enough away she couldn’t reach. “Five minutes. Then you leave.” He watched her until she nodded, “I love you, Hermione.” He released one final shaky breath, and then he pulled the walls of his mind up. She watched his eyes shift in color to the royal that signalled his occlusion. His thoughts and emotions locking behind steel doors, and padlocks so they were safe from his father. He gave her a small smile, that didn’t quite reach his eyes and then he was gone. 

Hermione stood there, staring intently at the dark wooden door as the morning light continued to stream in from the window. The seconds felt like minutes as her mind continued to race through every possible outcome. She knew deep down she couldn’t leave him here. Over the past several months Theodore Nott had taken a place in her heart that required her to protect him, much the same way she had Harry and Ron. 

Hermione started to pace, trying desperately to find a way to help her escape with Theo in tow. She released a shaky breath as she realized that Theo was right. That in order for Hermione to save him, she would have to travel to the Ministry...without him. She would have to leave him here with his father, while she convinced Kingsley to send the Aurors to Nott Manor. She just hoped she could gather the courage required to leave him behind, because as of that moment, she was certain it was impossible. 

As Hermione paced around the room waiting for the five minutes to be up she allowed her mind to wander through the life she had been secretly hoping for. Something that she had been thinking about while they read together in the light of the fire, or while he made her overly salted eggs for breakfast. A life that she would share with a Slytherin man with wavy black hair. A life that no one could take from them, and that they would build together. A life where they would be happy and would spend their days full of love and good books before they would entertain guests at a house party. A party where Harry and Ron would argue with Blaise about who would win the Quidditch Cup. Where Ginny and Luna would discuss the best treatments for hair, and Draco would tell the witches they were both wrong before telling them about the product that he uses. Draco. _Draco!_

The thought had barely formed in her mind as Hermione raced to the closet and pulled out the suitcase that Nott had brought with him. Yanking out pairs of socks and jeans, Hermione's hands eventually clasped worn leather. The book was warm and was burning her skin, the Protean Charm having been activated on the other side. The journal with the raven scorched onto the cover. She avoided reading the last conversation held between Theo and Draco, as it was honestly none of her business, and instead focused on the last glowing lines. The lines that had not been read yet, and the reason for the heat on the journal. It took her a moment to realize that it was Draco’s script since the usually elegant figures were hastily scrawled across the page. 

_Theo, your father has escaped Azkaban._

_Theo, answer me! I swear to Merlin if you are too busy with Granger I am going to hex your bollocks off!_

_Theodore!_

Hermione couldn’t help the feeling of pride that swelled when she realized both her and Draco remembered the journal. She knew that he would have been smart enough not to send a Patronus, just in case William had decided to make a trip home. It would be too easy to give away hiding positions...if they were hiding. Not for the first time she thanked her lucky stars that the blond Slytherin had been too stubborn to give up on being her friend. With those thoughts racing through her head, she quickly dug out the self inking quill that was packed away with the journal before scratching out a reply. She sent a prayer to all the Founders that Draco would be near his journal so the answer could reach him. 

**_Draco! He is here. We need help, please tell me you are waiting for a reply!_ **

She didn’t have to wait long for the book to warm under her hands, and Draco’s reply appeared on the pale page. 

_Yes I am here. What do you need!_

**_Theodore decided to face his father and wants to send me to the Ministry to get help. I don’t want to leave him!_ **

_Ok. I just sent a Patronus to McGonagall, she will get the Minister. That frees you up for whatever your bushy head can come up with. Don’t leave him, Hermione._

**_I won’t._ **

_Granger, listen to me. The bastard favors mental torture. BE CAREFUL. I don’t want to lose either of you. I can’t._

At that moment Hermione heard the echoes of the boy she loved as pain ripped through his body. His screams bounced off of the stone so that it sounded like a chorus of multiple voices were erupting in agony. Hermione gasped a little at the sound of him being tortured. She slammed the book shut, and walked to the door. She hesitated for only a moment staring back at the journal where it sat, nestled in between the sheets that she had shared with Nott not more than twenty minutes ago. She wished they had more time. Theo’s screams sounded again, and she shook her head. Draco would help get the Aurors. She would get Theo. They would make it. They had to. 

Hermione walked from the room, careful to tiptoe over old floor boards in areas where the flooring wasn’t stone so the wood wouldn’t creak. Somehow, she knew where they would be. Her feet carried her as if through a haze to the door. Into the room that had started what had happened between them in the middle of the night. The accursed lounge. The door was cracked open just slightly, so she lowered herself and peaked in through the crack. The screaming had stopped. 

“Why have you betrayed me, son?” William’s deep voice cut through the gasping breath that filled the room. Hermione could see William’s back to her, his dark hair oily from so long in the prison. He was wearing robes, but they hung off his body in a way that made it apparent he hadn’t had a decent meal in a while. His wand was pointed at a figure on the floor, the only indication that it was her Theo was the gray of the sleep pants that poked out from the other side of the couch. There was another wand that was being held in William’s left hand, but he quickly shoved that amongst the folds of fabric dangling from his body.

“I-I don’t know what you are talking about father.” Theodore’s voice, though filled with pain, was robotic. Hermione slowly watched him pull himself up, using the couch for support. She could see the crimson blood as it seeped quickly through his cotton shirt. Theodore’s face was closed off, but there was a crinkle at the edges of his eyes that showed he was barely holding back.

“Gabriel has made it perfectly clear that he cannot access my vault.” William paced around his son, his wand never leaving chest level, “If you have not betrayed me, why has Gabriel been denied access.” 

“Mr. Parkinson is no longer the Nott family lawyer. He did not have my best interests at heart.” Theodore replied, shrugging his shoulders like it should make sense to his father. 

“Then summon the lawyer who does have access to the vaults.” William sneered. 

“I am afraid I cannot do that father.” 

“And why, pray tell, not?” 

“Because you are a criminal, and I will not help you escape.” William’s face tilted into a fearsome grin. He grabbed hold of his son’s shoulder, and pointed his wand at Theo’s throat. 

“I don’t have time for your misplaced ideals.”

“Misplaced?”

“Misplaced. Your whore mother ruined you before you could wipe your own arse.” William kept his wand at Theodore’s throat. 

“Insulting my mother will not loosen my tongue.” Theo replied flippantly, he actually looked at his nails as if he was bored for a moment before turning to face his father fully. “Do your worst father, we both know that you can’t make me talk.” Hermione wanted to smack Theodore upside the head. Why the hell was he egging his father on? William grinned again at his son before taking a step back his wand raised. 

“I have never done my worst to you, son. But...if you insist.” Hermione saw William’s cracked lips begin to shape the curse, his eyes never leaving his son. For a millisecond all she could feel was fear, mixed with the bitter taste of dread. All she knew in that moment was that she couldn’t watch this. She was unaware of her own feet as they raced across the room. She had almost no control over her arms as they shoved violently into Theodore’s side. She distantly heard the crash of an end table as Theo landed into it, slumping over as the wood broke beneath his heavy frame. She gritted her teeth as the last syllable of the curse was finished, and the magic tore through her. The last thought she had before pain exploded beneath her veins was that she finally understood what drove a young five year old to stand in front of his mother. The love it took to jump in front of a curse for someone else. It was a bittersweet revelation that was met with searing agony.


	43. Mind Over Matter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).
> 
> Trigger Warning: This chapter contains mentions of torture and attempted sexual assault. Please read ahead at your own risk!

Hermione’s mind drew her back to the very first time Theo had ever hinted to having feelings for her. The way he had slumped sleepily on the couch, the alcohol working its way through his system after the Slytherin Quidditch team had bested Gryffindor. His thick, dark hair falling into his face, contrasting beautifully against his pale skin the firelight of the common room. The way he had drunkenly whispered that she smelled like Amortentia right before sleep claimed him. Hermione secretly wished she had told him then that she had feelings for him. Maybe then they would have had more time. Hermione wished that Theo would have admitted to liking her third year, and maybe they could have grown in their love as they experienced new things together… survived the war together. Maybe then she wouldn’t have spent so many lonely nights in the library wishing for someone to notice her. Maybe she would have had him, and he would have had her. 

Laying on the ground at the foot of Theodore’s father, as a full powered Cruciatus worked its way through her skin like tiny needles in between the thin layers of tissue, Hermione hoped they made it out of this. She hoped that she could tell him that her feelings for him ran deeper than love and that, if he would have her, she would gladly marry him. The curse shifted in feeling, keeping her on her toes, not allowing her a second to get used to a sensation while screams tore her throat into bloody shreds. It now felt like every solid part of her body was fracturing and chipping, like she would never be able to reset the bones. Like she would never be able to walk again, or simply wave her wand to cast a spell. She was unsure how long she lay under William’s wand, but the curse eventually let up. Still she clung to that one memory of Nott, hoping it would keep her sane. 

“ _ Petrificus Totalus! _ ” William’s voice echoed off of the walls, but that curse didn’t hit Hermione. The exhausted witch tried to comprehend what was happening, but she was unable to get her eyes to focus on the man in front of her. She couldn’t connect the dots of the spell being spoken and Theo still being somewhere in the room. Instead, she let herself enjoy the cold floor beneath her cheek, enjoying the reprieve from her torment. Hermione allowed her breathing to slow ever so slightly, staring dazedly at the fireplace, imagining another fire in a warm common room with a fluffy chair. William’s voice sounded again from her left. Blinking slowly, she tried hard to focus on the words. “No, no Theodore. I’m not done with her yet.” At the sound of his name, Hermione picked her head up and looked at Theo. The young wizard was currently frozen in place, still reaching for a scrap of wood on the floor. The piece of wood was thin, and lightly colored, not matching the other jagged pieces that lay scattered amongst the shattered remains of the end table. Theo’s face was frozen in determination, his eyes locked on its target, so that he was facing slightly away from her. 

William summoned Theodore so that his body was positioned on the couch next to her. “ _ Incarcerous. _ ” Thick black ropes shot from the end of William’s wand, wrapping themselves tightly around Theodore’s body. One more flick of the wand, and Theodore was no longer petrified, but was bound and attached to the couch, staring down at Hermione in panic. She looked up at him and managed what she hoped was a reassuring smile, but what she was sure came out as a grimace. Theodore on the other hand shook his head violently, cursing repeatedly as their eyes locked. His father watched the near silent exchange with little interest, twisted the wand he held in his hand over his dirt-caked fingers. 

“Ah, so the Mudblood  _ is  _ here.” William purred once his son’s outburst neared its finish. Slowly the older wizard leaned down close to Hermione, his breath hot and sticky ghosted her ear. As the older Nott spoke, Theo thrashed against his bindings, cursing again. The dark grey couch he was sitting on moved violently with every shake, causing a grinding noise to erupt as it scraped across the floor. 

“Get away from her.” Theo growled. His arms flexed against their bindings, trying to pull the ropes loose, but the magical restraints remained tight and immovable. 

“I thought you told me Miss Parkinson had fibbed about this  _ filth  _ being in the Manor.” Dirty hands rubbed Hermione’s curls out of her face, she tried to twist her head out of his reach, but aftershocks of the Cruciatus still coursed through her body making it hard for her to move. 

“You asked me if a Mud-” Theodore stopped himself, peering down at Hermione,“A Mudblood was in the Manor. I answered honestly.” Blood was still pooling beneath his shirt, but it appeared as if the worst of the cuts had nearly stopped their crimson geyser. The white cotton now looked like it was worn by a murderer on a rampage, clinging to his stomach with his every yank at the restraints. 

William’s rough hand quickly latched onto Hermione’s chin, holding her steady in a painfully tight grasp. “That was tricky of you, son. I am almost proud of you.” William’s voice was cold, his eyes flaring in annoyance, “Well, lets celebrate your little play on words shall we...make it official.” William raised his wand, smiling gently at his son. A manic gleam in his eye. Hermione had seen that gleam before, in the memory where William had killed his wife. Hermione felt fear, cold and slimy slip into her and sink low into her stomach.

“I wouldn’t kill her if I were you.” Theo called out. His voice was still robotic, but there was a hint of fear beneath the rhythmic cadence.

“Why not, Theodore.” 

“Do you really think I wouldn’t take your threats seriously?” Theodore demanded, his eyes locking on his fathers. “The lawyer, he didn’t just adjust the list of those allowed in the vaults. I named her my heir.” 

“All the more reason-”

“Not just my heir. If she dies all of our vaults go to the Hogwarts Muggleborn Fund. Even if I am still alive.” Hermione focused on Theodore’s words. His meeting with the lawyer earlier that week began to make sense. But...surely he was lying. A stalling tactic designed to fool his father, nothing more. “How do you feel about the Nott fortune being used to prepare Muggleborns for school? Buying them wands and spellbooks?” 

“You’re lying.” William snorted, but there was a hint of something else coloring his voice. Maybe desperation. William eyed his son carefully, examining every inch of the other man's face for any hint of deception.

“I don’t lie.”

“Fine,” William threw his hands in the air, before he turned back to his entangled son. The older wizard's eyes focused back on Hermione who was slowly recovering from the curse’s after effects. He laughed gently to himself, the deep voice reverberating off the walls, he took a step towards her causing Hermione to flinch. “But there are worse things than death, you know? I wonder…” William’s voice trailed off for a second before he looked up at his son, a sickening amusement present in the older man's eyes, “Did you bother to teach her Occlumency?”

Hermione glanced up quickly at the strangled sound that left Theodore’s throat, and saw the panic that coated Theo’s eyes morph into terror as he pulled even more at his binds. William flicked his wand at his son, the bindings now gagging the younger man, who was now struggling in earnest. His dark hair was wild, and he pulled against the restraints, grunting out unrecognizable words every few moments. His terror morphed into a form of pleading, his blue eyes gazing up at his father as if trying to get the man to understand. Theo shook his head in a pleading ‘no’ in desperation, but the older man merely laughed at his son's attempts. “I was always so disappointed that you were such an...adequate Occlumens. It made discussing things with you so one dimensional. But, I think we might actually get somewhere now.  _ Imperio _ .” 

As the curse touched Hermione, she felt like her entire body had been coated in a shimmering gloss. Everything around her looked shiny and new, and she felt unbelievably serene. She gazed up at William with her wide brown eyes, her innocent face waiting for a command. “On your knees, Mudblood.” The older man commanded. Slowly her body moved, fighting her muscles and trembling hands that were still weak from the Cruciatus, wanting nothing more than to please William. Hermione lowered herself before the wizard, on her knees, her hands at her sides, still gazing up into his cold, harsh eyes. 

Somewhere deep inside her mind, Hermione screamed. Her consciousness was trapped in an iron cage, forced to watch as her body behaved in a way that she would not. She pulled at the cage-like space, trying to force herself back in control of her mind. The curse was too powerful, and every time she tried to retake command of her body, she felt another wave of serenity push her consciousness back down. 

Theo was still fighting against his bindings, but Hermione couldn’t really remember why he was tied up. In the back of her head she recognized that she knew the boy positioned just to the right of her, but she couldn’t remember why or how. “Now, Mudblood, open your mouth.” Her mouth opened slightly, “No, wider.” She did so, opening her mouth until her jaw hurt. 

Hermione’s consciousness fought again, trying to force her limbs to scoot back, to punch or kick. She felt her arms twitch a little, felt her fingers wiggle just a bit, before the next wave of tranquility forced her back into the cage. William stood before her, smiling a sick smile as he moved back towards the boy struggling beside her. 

“You see son, the only good place for a Mudblood is on her knees.” William sneered while adjusting himself on the grey cushions. “Rowle always said Hermione Granger would be the  crème de la crème of Mudbloods. Let’s see how good she is. Must be something special for you to betray the Nott line.” William grabbed Hermione by the hair forcing her to turn and face the two wizards on the couch. Theo was staring at her, still on her knees, as his father sat beside him on the couch, “Closer bitch.” She moved closer. “Now lean forward.” She did, her head was now nearly in line with William’s hips. 

Hermione knew what he wanted, so inside her mind she fought. She pulled on the restrains holding her consciousness in place, trying desperately to break the confines of the Imperious Curse. She risked a quick peak at Theo who was still tied to the edge of the couch, he was refusing to look away. He fought, hopelessly, against his restraints, never taking his eyes off of her. He was watching her. 

He always watched her. 

Theo. 

Her Theo. 

Theo needed her. 

Every ounce of her body rocked with the love she had for him, every piece of the puzzle fitting back where it belonged as the brightest witch of the age took control of her mind once again. It felt like the world around her shattered into a million pieces at the moment her mind broke free of the curse. She felt the pain of the Cruciatus, and the searing fear that rocked her body when she realized she was about to be raped. This could have happened. It still could. She chanced a glance at William who had his hand on the zipper of his trousers, and was pulling them down. She had to act fast. So she did. 

In one swift movement Hermione leaned back until her back hit the floor, and in the same movement she forced her foot out from under her bum and kicked as hard as she could in between William Nott’s thighs. William cried out after a moment, and Hermione looked back at the broken end table. Hermione smiled when she saw the piece of wood Theodore had been reaching towards. When she had first seen it, she had been so relieved that the Cruciatus had ended that her mind was too frazzled to connect Theo’s reason for needing that piece of wood. But now she could see why her Slytherin had been so desperate for the thin piece of timber. Because that slightly different color stick was her wand. She rolled across the floor, and grabbed the now familiar rowan wood hilt. Gaining her feet back under her, she sprang up and trained her wand on the still sputtering William. William had his wand trained on her now, his other hand cradling himself between his thighs. Hermione, feeling a sick sense of satisfaction, quirked her mouth in a smile. 

“Get away from him.” Hermione’s voice commanded, low and dangerous. She stared at William Nott, anger flashing in her brown eyes. This was now an even fight. 


	44. Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating)

Hermione glared at the man in front of her, her eyes a mixture of so much rage and disgust that there was a flicker of fear among his blue eyes. William Nott did not, however, back down. Instead the wizard straightened his back and tightened his grip on his wand. The fire behind Hermione licked at the back of her legs, but the slight burn was nothing compared to the pain she had just endured at the end of William’s wand, so she ignored it.

“I said get away from him.” The words left Hermione’s voice in a low command, her voice barely above a whisper but William heard her loud and clear from his position on the other side of the room. His wand twisted in his hand, his eyes never leaving the brunette. William’s mouth lifted into a slow smile. Quicker than Hermione thought possible William grabbed hold of Theodore’s hair and yanked him into a standing position, the bindings tying Theo to the couch breaking loose with a flick of William’s wand. The rest of Theodore was still covered in thick magical ropes, but now he was positioned just in front of his father, a wand poking into his pale throat, while a large hand was wrapped around his black locks.

“So, you really think that you love him?” William sneered. The hand that held onto Theo’s hair gave a sharp yank causing Theo to emit a pained grunt.

“I don’t think. I know.” Hermione replied. Her hand wrapped a little tighter around the rowan wood of her wand. Her mind was racing faster than she thought possible. How long had it been since she talked to Draco? It could have been fifteen minutes or an hour, honestly, she had lost track of time during the cruciatus. How could she get a clean shot on Theo’s father without hitting Theo? She had a sudden thought that made her bite her lip in concentration. It would be more focused, and more difficult magic than she had ever performed, and she would have to keep William distracted to pull it off. Taking a deep breath, she steadied herself, preparing to fight once again for someone she loved. “I love him as much as Alcea loved Caiden.”

William Nott’s eyebrows lowered over his eyes, burying them in anger, his wand digging deeper into Theodore’s throat. “That whore was a fool.” William scoffed, his whole body was trembling in rage at this point. “She could have chosen any pure-blooded wizard, and he would have courted her…instead she widdled her time away with that filth. She should have been proud when I chose her.”

“But she wasn’t. Was she?” Hermione goaded.

“What do you know of it?” William spat. He pulled Theodore’s hair again, another pain filled yelp echoed through the room. Hermione risked a peak up at Theodore, his eyes shone back at her coated in fear and confusion. William was seething at this point, his focus solely on her face, and not on her empty hand which was positioned just beside her hip. Focusing all her energy on a single spell she waved her hand slightly, she felt the magic build within her, but when she tried to release it nothing happened. Furrowing her brows in concentration she tried again, the magic built within her once more, like a wave about to crash over a beach, but again nothing happened, and the wave retreated into her. William’s continued rant pulled Hermione from her focus, “I could have loved that-that bitch”

“I don’t think you are capable of love.” Hermione murmured. William’s woe-is-me attitude was grating on Hermione’s last nerve. She again tried to have the wandless magic erupt from her hand, but she was having trouble focusing in the moment.

“I love Theodore.” William stated. Hermione visibly rolled her eyes and scoffed, her anger coming back in full force. How dare he! How dare he claim to love his son after torturing him for years! She felt her face flush a deep crimson, her anger making itself present in her features. She also felt herself begin to shake uncontrollably, her body pulsating in anger.

“You do not love him. You have spent your life hurting him. That is not love!” Hermione yelled, magic spouting uncontrolled from the tip of her wand in the form of tiny sparks. William grinned, seeming pleased with her inability to control her emotions.

“He is my son-“ William started, but was quickly cut off.

“He is nothing to you.” Hermione hissed, her voice wavering in her anger, “Or more accurately you are nothing to him!”

William jerked his wand from Theodore’s throat and pointed it directly at Hermione’s face. His eyes locked with hers, both the witch and the older wizard staring each other down with unwavering conviction. Hermione raised her head in defiance, her feet spreading apart to strengthen her stance, readying herself for a fight. “Filthy Mudblood, you really think you could win this fight?” William sneered at her incredulously, moving to stand a little closer, pushing Theo more to his side. Theodore stumbled a little bit, his feet still tangled up in William’s incarcerous. Theo eventually fell to the ground, William releasing him to get a better stance in preparation for his fight with Hermione.

“Harry beat Voldemort, I think I can beat a second-rate wizard like you.” Hermione dared him to argue, but his face just contorted into a snarl. Her lips quirked into a small smile at the anger emanating off of William’s body. She found immense satisfaction in throwing the fact that Voldemort was dead back in this bigot’s face. Hermione had never really wanted to taunt those who had followed Voldemort, only to have him fall to Harry in the last moments, because in the end the war had cost both sides too much. Right now, in this room with William she let the small petty part of her emerge and relished in the way William seemed to flinch at those words.

“You shouldn’t speak his name.” William growled, his teeth baring against her.

“You shouldn’t open your trap at all!” Hermione kept her gaze trained on William, even as her hand moved subtly again at her side. An exceedingly small movement, just enough to channel a single vein of wandless magic. The warm caress of her magic built within her, cresting over her chest and down her arms to where it would find its direction. The determination she felt every time she wanted to complete a spell filled her once more. She could do this. She had to do this. With one more flick of a finger she thought hard about the spell she wanted to do. A wandless, wordless _Finite Incantatem._

The small quirk of her lips turned into a full grin when the magic rushed out of her body like a breeze of cool air and connected to its target. She watched the ropes that had been wrapped around Theodore dissolve into the air out of the corner of her eye. Hermione refused to look directly into his eyes no matter how much she wanted to as she could not risk the older wizard realizing what she had done. Theodore moved slightly so that he was positioned next to the arm of one of the couches, his father was still too distracted by Hermione to notice that his son was no longer restrained.

With Theodore safe and unbound, however, the time had come. With a wave of her wand Hermione sent a _Stupefy_ directly at William Nott’s chest. She did not expect it to be that easy, but that did not stop the disappointment from creeping into her heart when William easily deflected the charm. He quickly flicked his wand, sending another spell at her in response. Hermione rushed to raise her arm, shouted out in a strong voice, “ _Protego_.” The shield erupted from her wand, its silvery barrier deflecting the jinx that had been targeting her. Hermione used the opportunity to duck behind the couch that Theo had crawled next to, using its cushioning for a barrier. She saw Theo behind the couch, having moved back there when the first spell was fired, and smiled weakly. “I told you to run.” Theo grunted, his hand holding onto his chest over a particularly deep cut.

“I told you I couldn’t leave you.” Hermione responded quickly, she then lifted herself above the couch and shot another stunning charm at William. The older wizard had taken shelter behind a wingback chair positioned on the other side of the room. Her spell landed on the wall behind him, scorching the wallpaper and leaving behind a smoking black mark.

“You’re…You’re-“ Theo rolled his eyes frustrated, giving up on what he was going to call Hermione in favor of lifting his shirt. He evaluated the cuts for a few moments, seemingly satisfied with what he saw he lowered his shirt back down gently. “You’re bloody frustrating, is what you are!” He finally declared. “You couldn’t let me be bloody noble and sacrifice myself?!” He was nearly shouting to be heard over the ruckus behind them. Curses landed against furniture and the walls in chaos behind them. The slight grin on his face wiped any thoughts that he was actually angry from her mind.

“Never!” Hermione answered primly, a small smile tugging at her lips as well. Theo leaned over and kissed her quickly on the cheek, it was sloppy and wet but it still made a warm feeling tug in the brunettes stomach. Her hair was wild now, the residual magic in the air causing her curls to puff up in static. He quickly pushed a piece of her hair out of her face, trying to tuck it behind her ear, but the stubborn curl fell back against her cheek in a show of disobedience. Like the witch they belonged to, her curls could not be controlled. 

Their private moment was interrupted when a jinx rebounded from the other end table next to them sending the shattered remains of a vase their way. Theo moved quickly, covering Hermione’s body with his own as the glass rained down around them. “He is going to fucking kill us.” Theo growled, moving slightly so Hermione could send another spell at William in order to keep him pinned down. Theo seemed hesitant to allow her to completely remove herself from underneath his broad shoulders, but eventually gave-in and gave her more room so she could maneuver and cast more complex spells.

“No, he’s not.” Hermione growled back. Theo shot her a glare, but his eyes softened considerably when he gazed at her face. She was obviously knackered. The amount of strength it had taken to survive the Cruciatus and then to fight off the effects of the Imperious were beginning to show on her face. Her eyelids were heavy and her arms felt like jelly every time she raised them to perform wand movements. That coupled with the amount of spells that she had needed to cast these past few moments just to keep William locked in place so that he wouldn’t be able to land a killing curse had left her magical core depleted. She was exhausted.

He released a heavy sigh, lowering his hand to hold onto hers tightly, “I told you to run. The Ministry-“

“Draco is going to get them.” Hermione turned back around and shot two spells back at William. Theo’s hand tightened on hers nearly crushing the bones in the iron grip.

Theo’s brows scrunched in confusion for a moment, but then it was as if a light clicked behind his eyes. He nodded his head excitedly before lowering himself into a crouched position, standing on the balls of his feet. Hermione was privately thankful that he was as smart as her, and she didn’t have to describe how she had contacted Draco. He had obviously figured it out. “Ok, so Draco is going to get them. How do we deal with _him_ until then?” Theo asked. When Hermione hesitated to answer Theo nodded to himself, a decision seemingly made. Hermione was about to ask him what he was doing when Theo rose from the couch and charged across the room, ignoring Hermione’s desperate pleas for him to stop.

With Theo ignoring her calls, she took to casting the strongest _Protego_ she could manage around the younger Slytherins body. His father cast several curses his way, but they rebounded off her shield charm. Each curse caused white flashes to erupt around the room as they bounced unhindered off the shield, and with no destination, through the space. One of them headed towards Hermione, but she remained focused on the Shield charm, allowing the curse to nick her in the arm. A deep cut formed along her shoulder, and she could feel the warm blood rushing from the wound and down to the tips of her fingers. She bit down on her tongue to prevent herself from calling out. She could _not_ be a distraction. Not when her boyfriend was about to do _something_ against his father.

No more than three seconds later Theo had reached the wingback that his father was hiding behind. Theo barely slowed his charge, launching himself though the air and over the chair, tackling his father to the ground. There was a loud grunt from both men as their bodies became a tangle of limbs rolling to the center of the floor. Theo had tackled him, like a muggle would.

Hermione stood shocked for several moments, the echoes of spells in the room replaced by fierce grunts, the sounds of fists connecting, and the crunch of bone. Hermione shook herself from her shocked state and held her wand aloft. She knew this was going to hurt, but she also knew that she really didn’t have a choice. So, without taking careful aim, she shot two stupefies at the two men wrestling on the ground. The first one connected with Theodore, and once his flailing limbs ceased to move, she was then able to land a clean hit on William.

They were not her flashiest spells, but they had done the trick and now both men were unconscious on the floor. Hermione took a moment to take a quick shuddering breath before grabbing the wand that had been knocked from William’s hand. Her shoulder ached with each of her heartbeats as she began to search the unconscious bastard. She carefully rummaged through each of his pockets until she found Theodore’s wand as well. She whispered an _incarcerous_ against William, feeling justified at using the same spell that had left his son bound and defenseless earlier. Then, she picked up the younger of the Nott’s and, using all that was left of her strength, dragged him to the edge of the room.

With both men unconscious Hermione finally allowed herself to cry-out in pain with each inch she was able to pull Nott. The cut on her arm seemed to tear open with every jerk she gave in order to bring him farther away from his father. Once she was satisfied with the distance, she propped Theodore’s head on her lap, ignoring the blood that was still trickling down her arm. She was beginning to really feel the exhaustion now. Her eyelids became heavier than she could ever remember them. She took a deep breath, clenching her teeth when the skin on her shoulder pulled once more, and whispered a quick _rennervate_. She forced herself to remain awake while she watched patiently for Theodore’s eyes to open.

“Granger?” His voice was like a beacon of hope at the end of the tunnel. She knew that everything was going to be alright. Pushing his wand into his hand Hermione was able keep her eyes open long enough for him to clasp the wooden hilt before blackness began to spot her vision. “Granger!” Theodore’s worried voice penetrated her mind followed by the soft thud of her hitting the floor. Distantly she heard Theodore scramble to hold her, but she couldn’t quite manage to pull her eyes open, even when his arms wrapped around her. “Fuck. What did I do?” She heard his broken voice, but couldn’t bring herself to comfort him. His deep voice began to murmur a quick healing spell, but she knew it barely stitched her skin together. “Fuck!” He tried to murmur the spell again, but still the flesh barely came together. The thought that the warm blood flowing down her arm felt good against her cold skin whispered through her mind.

“It's going to be alright, Granger. Draco’s at the wards now.” Hermione felt herself being picked up, her head resting on his strong shoulder. Her body was jostled in response to Theo hurrying from the room, with her body tucked safely against his own. She heard the old door swing open, seemingly of its own volition as they approached. She felt a cool breeze hit her skin, followed by the warmth that radiated from the spring sun. The last thought that floated through her mind before she was sucked under into the darkness completely unconscious was that they had made it out. They had done it…together.


	45. White Curtains

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).

The blank expanse that surrounded Hermione was comforting. The relaxation that came with not really knowing who or what you are, right when you awoke from a deep sleep. Only she wasn't awake. Hermione allowed herself to soak in the darkness, allowed it to seep into her skin and muscles. Deep down she knew she was forgetting something or  _ someone _ important, but the thought fluttered around her like a butterfly flying in a particularly violent gust of wind. She thought for just a moment that it might be nice to exist in the blackness, she knew that there was something that she was leaving behind. She was leaving behind the stress and the anxiety that had plagued her for the past year, and that was something that she could easily accept. She could just let go, and she would never have to deal with it ever again. A tight feeling began to cling to her chest...a sickness at the thought of leaving, of giving up. The confusing feeling wound its way around her middle, tightening until she could barely think. The one thought that she could cling to creeped into her mind slowly, spreading a cold feeling through her veins like ice. 

She would also be leaving behind something else. 

_ Someone  _ else. 

A pair of blue eyes filled her mind, blinking up at her sleepily in the light of the morning. A pair of strong arms, holding her in an alcove away from everyone else. A cocky grin with a singular dimple lit up by the afternoon sun scorching across the black lake. Dark curls, soft like silk, moving through her fingers after one beautiful night. 

A cheeky wink on a broom high in the air above the pitch.

Warm hands cutting through her jumper to chase away the cold of the hallway.

A chuckle, deep and throaty. 

_ His  _ strong voice calling to her through the panic.

She couldn’t accept herself if she left this behind so she pulled herself up past the darkness. She crawled through the blackness until she knew she was safe. Until she knew that she would survive. And then...she allowed herself to rest. 

* * *

Hermione awoke from the blackness to a light, cool breeze coming in from an open window. She was able to hear the soft sound of trees rustling with new leaves, and the occasional bird as it chirped happily from its perch amongst the branches. Somewhere nearby she heard the occasional murmur of voices. The whispers were low, so it was difficult to make out exactly what they were saying while she tried to chase away the sleep. Finally, she was able to decipher the words. 

“I am telling you they don’t have a chance.” The first sentence was spoken by a man. The tempo of his sentence was slow and drawing, creating a cadence that was familiar and stern. She could almost picture a smirk draped across pointy features, and a flash of white blond hair.

“Yeah they do. With the new seeker they got from spring drafting they actually stand a pretty decent chance. This is their year, I can feel it!”

“You can  _ feel  _ it?”

“Yeah, I can  _ feel  _ it.” The second voice spoke again confidently. Flashes of a familiar redhead with gangly limbs and a hot temper filled Hermione’s mind as she listened to the discussion. Of course they would be talking about Quidditch while she was lying asleep nearby. It seemed no matter how hard Hermione tried, she couldn’t stop picking up Quidditch addicts as friends. Releasing a low sigh, she hesitated to open her eyes, unwilling to interrupt the relatively amicable conversation.

“I bet you five galleons that the Chudley Cannons don’t make it past the first quarter of the tournament.” The new voice entered the conversation easily. The effect was almost instantaneous as Hermione’s shoulders relaxed the stress she had been holding even unconscious. A warm, comforting feeling slipped into her stomach causing a flutter that made her belly feel like it was housing cornish pixies. The grin that spread over her lips was slow and lazy. 

Hermione could no longer help herself. She opened her eyes in several flickering blinks and sought out the owner of the sound like a dragon searching for her prey. When her chocolate eyes found his face, profiled against the backdrop of white curtains she nearly cried in relief. His dark hair was mussed and tousled, standing up at odd ends so that it looked just like Harry’s. The pale skin around his face was clean, but he did have dark circles under his eyes and the shadow of facial hair around his chin like he hadn’t shaved in several days. She glanced down and saw that one of his hands was clinging to hers like a lifeline. As she watched, he seemed to squeeze it unconsciously, his thumb working softly across her knuckles. He was sitting closer to her head than any of the other people in the room. He currently had a smirk on his face, but it seemed weaker than normal. He looked tired. Almost as tired as she felt. Theodore. 

Taking in the rest of the area she was able to determine that she was in hospital (based on the white cotton curtains currently blocking her view from the rest of the room). On her left sat Harry and Ron. Harry was trying to actively hide a snicker, while Ron was looking flustered and red in the face. On her right-next to Theodore-sat Blaise and Draco. Blaise had his arm casually hanging off Draco’s shoulder, with Draco’s hand entwined lightly with the darker skinned wizard’s. Draco leaned into Zabini’s body, and it seemed with every single breath they moved closer together. She was happy that everything seemed to be working out with them.

All the boys in the room looked exhausted. Draco’s white oxford looked wrinkled making it obvious he had not changed in several days, and his eyelids drooped heavily over his grey eyes. Harry’s glasses had slid down low on his nose, like he was too tired to push them back to their rightful place. Ron was bearing thick dark circles under his eyes and was crouched down low in his chair. The only one who looked remotely put together was Blaise, and even he looked like he had been wearing the same clothes for at least twenty-four hours.

“They will!” Ron nearly shouted, promptly getting shushed by every other boy in the room…except for Blaise, who had noticed she was awake and was smiling at her gently. The two shared a knowing look together. The Italian smirked at her, released a deep sigh followed by a dramatic eye roll. Hermione nearly giggled but was able to stay quiet as the conversation kept on. She was proud of herself for stopping the laughter in its track, because she wasn’t quite ready for this little tiff between her friends to end.

“Put your Galleons where your mouth is!” Draco snickered. Hermione enjoyed this quiet moment where all the men in her life seemed to be getting along….well relatively along anyway. It made her remember that dream she had of a life where they all shared a dinner party together. Seeing them like this made that dream more of a reality. Blaise carefully pushed Draco’s hair off the boy’s forehead earning him a genuine smile from the blond.

“If you idiots would stop arguing about Quidditch for three seconds you might have noticed that she is awake.” Blaise prompted gently. Every head in the room swiveled to look at her so fast she suspected they might have popped their necks. There was a moment of stunned silence followed by an immediate uproar. Draco launched himself to his feet with Harry. Both boys then rushed out of the curtained sanctuary calling violently for a healer. Ron grabbed hold of one of her hands, demanding to know if she felt ok, if she was in any pain, if he had accidentally awoken her. Theo just watched her. Relief making a stark appearance on his tired face. Blaise sat back in his chair, finding enjoyment in the rush of all the other wizards in the room.

“You gave us one hell of a scare, Granger.” Theo whispered breathily, pushing her riotous curls back on her forehead. “I thought we were going to lose you, you stupid girl.” He leaned down and brushed a kiss across her cheek. Ron looked away, a deep flush making another appearance on his freckled cheeks. Hermione sighed when Theo’s lips made contact with her skin, blinking a few times to try and clear the blur from her eyes. She wasn’t sure if the blur was from exhaustion or from tears, but from the wet path down her cheek she suspected it was a mixture of both.

“You scared me too.” Hermione sniffled, grabbing his hand and holding it tightly. “What prompted you to make such a stupid decision. You could have been hit with a curse.” Theo flinched when she said that, his eyes darting quickly to her shoulder before shooting back up to her face. Hermione shifted her weight, grimacing when her shoulder moved.

“Don’t move yet, Granger. Draco should be back soon with a healer.” Blaise remarked, keeping his distance so the other two boys could continue to dote without interruption.

“You were right. I should have just trusted you and waited for Draco to get there.” Theo rushed the words out, looking increasingly angry with himself with every syllable. He looked down at the bed, avoiding her eyes, “I was stupid.”

“Yes, you were. But I would do it all over again.” Hermione gazed up at Theodore until she made eye contact with him, “I would do it all over again because I love you.” His face relaxed a little, but still the anger seemed evident in his eyes. It was clear that this would be something that they would have to work on. She would just have to convince him to stop blaming himself for every bad thing that happened to someone he loved. She knew it would take some time, but it was time she was willing to invest in him.

“I love you, too.” Theodore sighed. He leaned his head down on her forehead resting it there for a moment before pulling back and coughing slightly. Ron looked back at her, a small grin on his face. Blaise stood up from his chair, stretching his long arms over his face before scratching his ribs. The darker wizard then moved towards a back corner in the curtains so he was out of the way. He flashed Hermione a charming smile from his corner, giving her a small nod. Hermione smiled back before turning back to the other two boys. 

“Where am I?” Hermione prompted, relaxing into the bed. 

“St. Mungos.” Ron looked down at his feet for a moment, speaking low into the room. Ron had always hated coming to St. Mungos, ever since fifth year when his father had been admitted after being attacked by a horcrux. She briefly wondered how long he had been waiting for her to wake up. 

“What day is it?”

“Well, Miss Granger you have been asleep for about a week.” A healer declared, sweeping into the room like a tornado with a purpose. She quickly ran her wand over Hermione’s prone form, tutting to herself as she went. 

“A week!” Hermione nearly shot out of her bed, but two sets of strong arms locked her in place. She glared at both Ron and Theodore who both looked at each other knowingly. She got the sinking suspicion that they had discussed this plan of action prior to her waking up, knowing that the news that she had been unconscious for so long would elicit such a reaction from Hermione. Unable to fight against the two wizards as they kept her pinned to the bed, Hermione took the moment to gaze at the healer. The healer had blond hair that was wrapped into a low ponytail. Her brown eyes were so dark they looked almost black, and pierced the room with a cool confidence. She looked disapprovingly at the gentlemen currently making themselves at home in her little curtained nook.

“Yes, a week, Granger.” Draco remarked haughtily, walking back into the room with a book in hand. “Yes, we were unable to test our potions project like we were scheduled to, as you decided to take a weeklong kip and we missed our testing time. And yes, Theodore and I have already discussed with Professor Slughorn about an extension. We have also found a volunteer to fill your position as test subject, seeing as how Theodore said and I quote ‘if you even think about making Hermione take that potion, I will personally kill you’.”

Draco rolled his eyes dramatically before throwing his arm around Theodore, who was currently glaring at his best friend, and handing Hermione the book he had brought in. “But you see,” Draco continued without missing a beat, “I knew that big brain of yours wouldn’t be content hiding under that rats nest you call hair, and it especially wouldn’t be able to sit idly for the next four days while this healer pokes and prods you. So, being the wonderful friend that I am I brought you the limited edition ‘Sprigler’s Potions: Ingredients and their Properties’.” Hermione allowed her fingers to trace delicately over the leather bound book. Draco spoke casually, as if this were a book that you could purchase at any old bookstore, but she knew that it was a rare find…and an expensive find…it brought a big smile to her face.

“Who volunteered?” Hermione asked after she had blinked away the tears of joy from receiving the thoughtful gift.

“That would be yours truly.” Ron grumbled playfully, a cup of water in one hand that he offered to Hermione. She took it gratefully, the cool liquid coating her throat made her release a pleased sigh. “I will take this potion of yours. and allow you to examine my seemingly lifeless body.” Ron propped his hip against the side of her bed, smiling down at her while waiting for her to finish her cup. Once she did, he took it and placed it on the table next to the bed.

“What happened to…to your father?” Hermione peered up at Theo whose jaw tightened at the mention of his father. He huffed a couple of times before running both hands up and down his face.

“The Kiss was administered as soon as the Aurors were able to take him back to Azkaban. It was my suggestion. Mr. Parkinson and Pansy were linked to his escape through his confession under the influence of Veritaserum. Pansy is currently being held at the Ministry with her father awaiting trial.” After he had finished this explanation, Theo licked his lips anxiously before facing Hermione fully once again. “I really didn’t think she would have gone so far to hurt you.” Theo’s voice had taken on the robotic quality that meant he was Occluding, but before Hermione could prompt him to drop the walls Harry reentered the cave of curtains, Ginny and Neville hot on his heels.

The fiery redheaded witch immediately shoved her brother out of the way, ignoring his indignant cries, and wrapped her arms around Hermione. The healer made a noise of discontentment before huffing and shoving her way through the increasing number of bodies in the small space. “You are so stupid, Hermione.” Ginny growled in her ear. “I can’t believe you went toe to toe with William Nott!”

“I had help.” Hermione shrugged, shooting Theodore a quick smile. He was working on backing away from her to make room for more people to see her, but before he could get too far she snatched his hand keeping him in place. “Don’t even think of leaving.” She demanded. He nodded slowly, retaking his position in the chair beside her head. After several minutes of making sure Hermione was ok, Ginny slowly moved out of the room, kissing Harry on the cheek as she passed, causing Ron to turn a deep shade of magenta.

Ron mentioned something about contacting Mrs. Weasley about Hermione being awake, he left quietly flashing her a sweet smile as he did. Harry dropped a kiss to the top of her head before following his best friend, exiting the curtains. Neville made sure Hermione was alright too before stopping next to Draco, clearing his throat to get the blonds attention. “Hey, Seamus wanted me to ask if you two are going to finish your Alchemy project any time soon?” Neville eyed Draco critically for a moment, standing tall against the blond’s icy stare. Draco released a heavy, huffing, breath throwing his hands in the air in frustration.

“I told Finnegan I wasn’t touching it until he was able to transmute bronze into brass. Did he figure out how to do that yet?” Draco inquired roughly. When Neville shook his head Draco scoffed. “Well there's your answer Longbottom.” Neville hung his head low, looking like Draco had scolded him before shuffling out of the curtains

“Really Draco?” Hermione prompted, giving him a disappointed look. Hermione knew very well that one could not transmute bronze into brass. It wasn’t possible. Draco had sent Seamus on a wild goose chase, and Seamus was just thick enough to believe he could make dinner out of it. 

“No not really, but I have to make the Irish git sweat for a bit. I finished the project over break…I had a little help from a fairly attractive wizard.” Draco blushed a rather pretty pink, which grew into an aggressive red when Blaise sauntered up and wrapped his arms around him from behind.

“Awe, grazie amore mio.” Blaise dropped a kiss to Draco’s neck causing him to cough sheepishly. Blaise shot Hermione a lascivious wink before wrapping Draco’s hand in his darker one. Playfully he led Draco out of the room, whispering things in Italian that made Draco’s face and the back of his neck turn even more red, to the point that he looked like a mascot for Gryffindor. Hermione smiled at the two of them before turning back to Theo.

Alone together for the first time since she woke up Hermione released a breath she hadn’t realized had been stuck inside of her. She relaxed her shoulders before turning to Theodore and whispering, “Do you think...” She hesitated, taking a deep breath she began again in a small whisper, “Do you think you could read to me?”

Theo gave her a brilliant smile, before snatching the book from her hand. The walls that had been positioned behind his eyes dropped quickly, leaving behind the full force of his emotions. The amount of warmth and passion she saw in his eyes caused her breath to hitch on its way out. Theo didn’t seem to notice and leaned towards her before resting his forearms on the bed. His arms caused the crisp white sheets to wrinkle under their weight. He then gently propped the heavy tome against her hip. Theo’s voice was low and sweet, just like his answer, “Anything for you, Granger.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 2: I do not speak Italian. According to google, Blaise says "Awe, thank you, my love." In case you were curious.


	46. Goodbyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).
> 
> A/N 2: This is the final chapter...Thank you all who stuck with me since the beginning. I hope that I have given you a story to add to your favorite list, or have just helped fill a few hours of your day with joy! Without further ado here is the conclusion to Rowena's Study
> 
> Mature Content Ahead: This fanfic was rated M for a reason. Ahead are some sexually explicit scenes. Please read at your own risk

Hermione stared down at Ron's lifeless body, her breath coming in rapid pants. Their potion had, in theory, worked. Ron was now in a living death-like state. While she knew deep down that once they administered their antidote he would be right as rain, she was still anxious. What if Theo had miscalculated the runes? What if Draco had misinterpreted how much of each ingredient they would need? What if she had forgotten to check her answers once she had tested the Arithmancy equation to verify it would work? What if they had fucked up the potion?

Theo sat beside her, and gently wrapped his arm around her waist. It had been three weeks since they had fought his father, and he had come to standing by her side as often as possible, not that she was complaining. "I told you it is going to be fine, Granger." His voice, deep and low, was the only thing that brought her comfort in this moment. "It _will_ work."

Professor Slughorn and Professor McGonagall stood on either side of the room, prepared to intervene if the potion's antidote did not take effect within two minutes of administration. Draco was currently measuring out the amount that would be needed for a wizard of Ron's height and weight. Once he was confident he had measured out the correct dosage, he nodded to the two of them. Hermione murmured the equation again to herself before moving forward and opening her ginger friend's mouth. Draco carefully poured the amber liquid down Ron's throat, as Theo gently massaged his throat in order to get him to swallow the potion.

Then, Hermione started a timer and the three eighth years sat back, waiting patiently. After ten seconds Hermione began to sweat. What if they were wrong? What if Ron never woke up? How could she ever forgive herself? Twenty seconds passed. Well, she just killed one of her best friends! He would forever be locked in a coma. Never talking about the bloody Cannons again. Never telling her that she was a swot. Never talking about how hungry he was. Never-

A cough

Blue eyes fluttering open against the harsh torch light. "Blimey. That was peaceful." At the sound of his voice Hermione launched herself into the redhead. She hugged tightly to his neck, kissing him sloppily on his cheek.

"I was so worried." She managed through her rapidly beating heart.

"It only took thirty seconds to work, Granger. Have a little more faith in me." Hermione rolled her eyes at the fake look of hurt on Draco's face. The blond smiled at her before standing up and moving on to clean up the potions mess.

"Excellent work!" Slughorn called from somewhere behind them. Hermione moved off of Ron, giving him room to breath. She stood quickly, giving Theo a celebratory hug which he returned, nearly crushing her. "This is great work. Outstanding! All of you." The portly wizard moved forward, holding a clipboard in his hand. After scratching a couple of notes in the margins he returned the essay they had written regarding the theory of the potion. Hermione took a deep breath before looking down at the essay. A beautifully messy 'O' was scribbled on the top of the page. Hermione launched herself again into Theodore, this time kissing him earnestly. Theodore returned her kiss, only stopping when he heard a clearing of a throat behind them.

Professor McGonagall gave them a stern look, but a smile played at the corner of her lips. "Well done to the three of you. I will be awarding fifty points to each of your houses." The older witch then winked at Hermione before exiting the room, Professor Slughorn following after her.

"I can't believe we did it!" Hermione beamed up at her two project partners. "Thank you, Ron for letting us test it out on you." Ron shrugged, giving her a hug before mentioning - to no one's surprise - that he would be going to dinner. The three waved him off, before Hermione and Theo began helping Draco clean up their mess. Once the cauldron was properly stored away, Hermione turned to Theo and Draco.

"I don't really want to go to the Great Hall." She sighed, taking in the cold stone of the potions laboratory. The two Slytherin's nodded in agreement, standing off to the side so that they formed a weak triangle. This was one of the last class projects that they had to participate in before the end of the year. They only had a couple of weeks before N.E.W.T. testing began, and most classes were dedicating that time for revision. It was bitter sweet.

"Got somewhere else in mind?" Draco startled her from her thoughts. He slid up beside Hermione, his arm thrown around her neck.

"Actually…"

* * *

Forty minutes later the three friends sat on a familiar couch, the blue fabric rubbing pleasantly on Hermione's legs. "It's been too long since we have sat in here together." Hermione commented, leaning her head on Draco's shoulder. She gazed around the familiar study, a heavy weight sinking in her chest as she realized that soon their time in this room would come to an end. Soon they would be leaving Hogwarts, and this wonderful room, behind. Part of her was still scared that this might have all been a dream.

"Yes it has," Theo sighed. He propped his head up against her shoulder while Draco leaned his against the back of the couch. The fire in the corner of the room continued to crackle. "Want to finish studying for our N.E.W.T.'s up here? Do you think Blaise would mind?"

Draco looked down at the two of them, his eyes aloft with the adoration he felt for both his friends, and the Italian. "No, I don't think he will, as long as I return to his bed at night." Hermione felt her cheeks flair at his casual mention of sex. Draco and Theodore both erupted in laughter at her embarrassment. Hermione rolled her eyes before summoning a pale piece of parchment from her bag. She crossed her legs beneath her so that she could balance a book beneath the parchment, creating a hard surface to write on. Together the three of them drafted a study schedule for the next couple of weeks, until their N.E.W.T.'s began. Once they were finished, Hermione stared down at the color coded masterpiece with a fond sadness.

"I don't know if I am ready for this to end." She whispered. Both Slytherins wrapped her in a hug. She allowed herself to be comforted by the familiar smells of this room. The familiar warmth that flowed from the fireplace.

"Oh, Granger." Theo breathed, a soft puff of hair caressing the top of her head, "I am utterly afraid you are stuck with us." Draco nodded his agreement.

Hermione laughed gently, her face breaking into a smile so big that it hurt. "Then, so be it." She kissed Draco on the cheek before turning and kissing Theodore on the mouth. The three of them sat in Rowena's Study that night. They talked like they had at the beginning of the year, before the drama with Pansy, and William Nott had taken residence in their lives. They talked about what the future would hold for them, and how they were happy that they had found each other this year. They continued chatting until dawn broke over the trees of the Forbidden Forest. Seeing daybreak, Draco mentioned that he would need to return to Blaise before the wizard began to worry. As Draco stood at the door, his hand on the handle he turned and made eye contact with Hermione for just a second before a gentle smirk graced his pale face. "Tomorrow, Granger?" He asked gently. Hermione found her mind transported back to the first night they had ever been in the study, and couldn't help the smile that broke over her soft features.

"Yeah, I'll be here." She whispered back, her hand grabbing hold of Nott's as they stood at the door, waiting for their turn to pass through it. Hermione watched Draco go through, leaning into the wizard at her side as exhaustion began to overtake her body. She smiled gently at Nott as the door closed behind the blond, waiting for him to open the door. He gave her a nudge with his shoulder before motioning with his hand for her to go first, she opened the door feeling a pang at the thought that it was one of the last times she would be leaving the study.

* * *

Hermione took a deep breath, the heavy weight that was on her shoulders finally lifting as the door to the room swung open. They were officially done with testing. Hermione walked out of her Herbology exam, her head held high. No matter what happened, she had officially finished her schooling at Hogwarts. She pushed back the smattering of tears that had gathered at the edge of her eyes, and smiled to herself. She had done it. _They_ had done it. Her gaze drifting along the stone hallway looking for the two Slytherins who were supposed to be meeting her. Her gaze only fell on one, though, his blond hair shining brilliantly under the setting summer sun. Waving goodbye to Harry and Ron, she promised she would meet them for the end of year celebration later that night.

"Happy Birthday, Draco!" She smiled brilliantly, her white teeth practically gleaming under the last of the light as she approached the wizard. Draco turned to her, wrapping her in a big hug before holding her at arm's length.

"Hermione? Is that you? Has the evil study shrew finally relinquished her hold on you?" Hermione lightly pushed his shoulder at his joke, before shoving a single wrapped present in his hand.

"Oh ha ha, you are hilarious." Hermione rolled her eyes, turning back down the hallway, "Where is Theodore?"

"He said he was going to the Study. Not sure when he will be back." Draco waved his hand distractedly before shaking the gift in his hand.

"Knock that off." Hermione scolded, "Do you have any idea how long it took me to find that?"

"What is it?"

"Open it and find out."

"Know-it-all."

"Git."

Draco opened the present, blinking down at the package several times like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. Then, he grinned broadly. Written across the cardboard surface in bright yellow swirling letters was the following 'They bounce so high, it's like magic!' Inside the box, was 250 brightly colored bouncy balls. "You are a right mess, Granger." He laughed before quickly opening up the box and plucking a pink and purple one out of the box. "The Slytherin Common room thanks you for this." He smiled conspiratorially, before his eyes grew serious again, "Thank you." He hugged her once more, his arms holding her tightly.

"You're welcome." Hermione murmured into his chest. He released her, chatting excitedly about how he was going to show Blaise before their date.

"Come to the study first? We need to all say goodbye to the room together!" Draco nodded eagerly, before looping his arm with hers as they started towards the library.

Draco had opened up so much more now that he was with Blaise. He seemed so much freer, like nothing in the world could stop him. Hermione was happy to learn that Narcissa had accepted the news of her son's choice of partner with nothing less than proud understanding and acceptance. She had invited Blaise over for tea the next day, and from what Hermione could tell, the two were getting along famously. Blaise's family on the other hand had been less than understanding. It wasn't necessarily that Blaise had chosen a wizard as a partner, but who that wizard was. Hermione had volunteered to speak with Mrs. Zabini on Draco's behalf, but Blaise had simply told her he had been waiting for a reason to cut ties with his mother for years, and was happy to do so now. Draco had taken the news relatively hard, but after several kind words from his friends (Harry and Ron included) the blond was feeling better. Now, Blaise and Draco were searching for a flat in downtown Diagon Alley, and planned to open their own potions shop.

Hermione wandered towards the back of the library, smiling at Madam Pince, who looked at her fondly as the bushy haired witch continued her path, dragging Draco along with her. Occasionally, Hermione's hand would lift on its own accord, brushing the many worn spines of some of her favorite books. She was going to miss this part of the castle most of all. Sure, her common room had some of her most fond memories, she blushed a little remembering how Nott liked to treat her in her cushy chair, but the library had always been there for her. For better or worse.

Finally, she came to the familiar wooden door. Hermione and Draco slowed their pace, allowing it time to open for them as they approached. Hermione heard his familiar voice before he seemed to notice that the door was opening.

"-will like it?"

"Of course she will, she will love it." Hermione stared stunned at the familiar painted face of Rowena Ravenclaw. The witch was on her knees in her painting, staring down at Nott, who had his back to Hermione. Rowena was smiling broadly, her hands clasped in front of her face, before they both covered her mouth. "I am so proud of you. All of you." The witch then raised her eyes and stared gently at Hermione, "Even you two, Miss Granger and Mr. Malfoy." Hermione saw a red flush creep down Nott's neck, but quickly looked back at the painting so she wouldn't seem rude.

"Thank you so much, Professor Ravenclaw." Hermione gave the painting a watery smile. "Thank you for allowing us the use of your study." Hermione heard the _snap_ of something closing. She turned her head towards the noise, which seemed to come from Nott, but before she could see anything Draco had stepped up between them, blocking her view of Theo.

"Yes, thank you." The blond nodded in agreement. He turned to Theodore, so Hermione's view was even more blocked. She couldn't see the black box as it was tucked safely in the pocket of the taller Slytherins trousers. Then, Draco stepped back, Theo following after him so all three were lined up in front of the older witch.

"You are always more than welcome to use the study." Rowena stood slowly, squaring her shoulders and lowering her hands so that they were clasped gently in front of her. "Just because you are leaving Hogwarts does not mean that you are not more than welcome to return. I expect great things from the three of you." With that the wise witch gave them one last smile before turning to walk deeper into her painting.

"Well this is it." Draco murmured running his hand down the fabric of the old chairs.

"Yeah," Hermione breathed. She looked at her two friends, so proud of all they had done and accomplished together. "I am going to miss it." Hermione turned to the window, so she missed the glance the two boys shared. Draco cleared his throat, before giving her a quick hug.

"I have to go get ready. See you at the celebration later tonight?"

"Of course."

The blond gave Theo a quick slap on the shoulder before turning and walking through the door. The silence that filled the room was light, filled with memories and thoughts of the future. Hermione stepped up to Nott, allowing her arms to find a home around his waist. He held her just tight enough, his head cushioned on her curls as they both watched the fire dance in the evening light.

After several moments of standing there in each other's arms, Theodore used his fingers to raise her chin so that she was looking at him. With no words muttered he lowered his lips so they covered hers. The gentle kiss lasted for several moments, lazily circling her tongue with his. He released a deep, guttural groan when he was able to elicit a small whimper from her throat.

Without her realizing what was happening, Theodore backed her up to the desk at the back of the room, picking her up by the waist so that she was positioned on it before stepping between her thighs. The kiss that had begun slowly, began to become more ferocious. He nipped on her lips, and she quickly undid the buttons on his shirt before pushing it violently off of his shoulders. Ripping herself from his lips, she kissed down his chest. She paid special attention to each scar, before her fingers began to play gently with his belt. He gasped a little when her fingers touched the soft line of hair that disappeared beneath his trousers, causing her to bite her lip at the sound.

He quickly captured her mouth with his, undoing the buttons on her shirt, before following her example, and coating her chest in wet kisses. He captured a nipple through the material of her bra, causing her to release a sound akin to a choking noise. He smirked up at her, proud of himself before lightly lowering the white straps over her arms. With a swift flick of his fingers, the clasp became undone and the bra joined the growing puddle of clothes on the floor. This was followed in quick succession with her skirt, and knickers.

Theo lowered himself down on his knees. He slowly freed her of her shoes and socks, before kissing his way up one of her ankles, to her thighs. He gave her a sultry smile before lowering himself in between her thighs. He breathed in deeply, releasing a quick breath. The warm air tickled her thighs, which were already wet with her arousal. Then, using the flat of his tongue, he licked Hermione's center until she fell backwards on the desk.

Inks and papers cascaded onto the floor like rain, her hands looking for purchase anywhere until they found the sharp edge of the desk. The cool wood felt like ice against her heated skin, causing her already taught nipples to tighten even further. Hermione used her own fingers to relieve some of the tension located there, while Theodore focused on the bundle of nerves between her thighs. Every lick felt like fireworks exploding in her blood, every pinch of her fingers like lightning.

When she looked down, she saw Theo's eyes locked on her hands, seeming to find his own pleasure in what she was doing to herself. His gaze flicked up to hers, forget-me-not meeting cocoa, before Hermione began to shudder under his touch. Her moans erupted into the room, followed quickly by his name as it tumbled from her lips. He continued to lick her through her orgasm before standing up quickly, shoving his trousers, and pants violently to the ground.

Hermione couldn't help the look that she gave him. Her gaze was dark with lust, and filled with need, the like of which he had never seen. He closed his eyes quickly to regain some control, before taking himself in hand and positioning himself before her. At her quick nod of reassurance he pushed into her gently. This was only her second time, so he entered her slowly so she could adjust. Then, after several agonizingly slow moments, he started to move.

Hermione had never felt so close to anyone in her life. Not just physically, as he did fill her completely in a way she knew no other man would ever do, but mentally as well. They shared a connection that felt like it ran all the way down to her very soul. It was in this moment that she realized where the term soulmates came from, and she was so happy she had found hers. She knew that she would fight an army of dark wizards if it meant she could share moments like this with Theodore Nott.

With every thrust of his hips, she felt her very essence shifting and entwining with his. With every push of his body, he pulled her closer to the edge while also entangling them together. Her hands found purchase on his shoulders, and on his hair...anywhere she could reach to keep them together. She felt tears of happiness stinging her eyes as she moved with him, picking up her hips to meet his. The love she felt for him was driven into every shift of her hips. It was poured into every kiss of her lips on his. By the time they were both crying out in pleasure, her name gracing the air from his lips, they were covered in a fine layer of sweat. Hermione's tears were tracing down her eyes as they both slowed their rocking until finally they were still. She felt like a powerful bond had been formed between them, and smiled weakly at the thought.

Theo seemed to sense that the tears were not due to sadness and kissed them away slowly as he pulled out of her. When Hermione looked up at him, she saw his eyes shining as well. "I know, Hermione. I felt it too." He kissed her quickly, before laying down on the desk next to her. It was a tight fit, but they managed, though she felt that Theo's body was half hanging off the side. After several moments he began to chuckle, causing Hermione to glance at him in concern.

"I have wanted to do _that...here..._ since that first night we were all here." He broke out into a hearty chuckle before climbing down from the desk.

"I guess you can check that off the Hogwarts bucket list." Hermione gave him a wry grin, glancing around the room for her clothes before dressing.

"Yeah, I guess I can." He kissed her on her curls at the top of her head, buttoning his shirt as he did. He leaned back once he was done, running his hands down the back of his head sheepishly before turning to her. "Hey, Hermione-," she got the sense that he was formulating something to say in his mind so she waited patiently for him to continue. "I know that you, well that you can't go back to your parents," He flinched as he said this, but continued on in a rush, "And I know that you could stay with the Weasleys or with Potter, but I just wanted to say that you could….well, you could stay in the manor again...if you wanted. Or we could get a flat. I just mean-well...I guess I am asking if you would like to move in with me?"

Hermione rolled her eyes at him for a second, before turning to him and giving him a large kiss. His hands instinctively went to her hips, before one came up and tugged on her neck to deepen the kiss. Eventually, she pulled away and gave him a large smile. "Of course I will live with you Nott. I love you."

He smiled at her fully, his dimple finding purchase on his face as he wrapped her in a hug and spun her in a quick circle. Hermione couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. "I love you too," He breathed before kissing her again.

"What question were you asking Rowena?" Hermione asked. In the four years she had used the room she had never called the founder forth to ask her anything. She was curious as to what Theo needed help with.

"I'll tell you later." He smiled at her, grabbing her hand tightly as they both left the room, Hermione gave the space one final goodbye as they went to join the rest of their friends at the celebration. Hermione knew that no matter what happened in the future it would be alright, because they were going to accomplish great things...together.

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N 3: I will be working on another story that will be a werewolf Dramione. It may take me awhile to write it, but if you are interested I should be posting the first chapters in October sometime. Let me know below if this is something that you would be interested in!


	47. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Harry Potter or any characters/locations related to the franchise. That all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I hope you enjoy the only thing I do own...the plot. Also M rating for language and possible sexually explicit scenes (really just wanted to be safe with the rating).
> 
> A/N 2: Someone had asked about an Epilogue so here you go. The story is complete without it but...if you just HAVE to know what happened here ya go! I hope you guys enjoy it! I wrote it really quickly so please be gentle if you choose to comment.

**9 Years Later**

“Where is my Teddy Bear?” Hermione called out to the empty room, listening intently for the tell tale sign of a muffled giggle. Sooner than expected she heard it coming from the other side of the open space. Crossing through the bright room, she walked steadily towards the large bookcase. Carefully selecting the title ‘ _ Hidden Adventures _ ’ Hermione pulled it out, until she heard a very distinct  _ click _ . She smiled as the bookcase glided into a hidden pocket in the wall revealing a secret reading nook with two large chairs. 

“Where-o-where could my Teddy Bear be?” She called again.

Springing forth from behind one of the overstuffed chairs, in a flash of black wavy hair, a small five year old pronounced, “Here I am, mummy!” Hermione gave her daughter a bright smile before false-starting in a run, making the little girl giggle out loudly with a play scream. 

The girl darted back around Hermoine as quickly as she could, running back through the playroom. She jumped over toys that had been left out of their toy box. Hermione slowly gave chase so the girl had time to keep ahead. Their chase took them out of the playroom and down the halls of the old castle, until the dark haired child darted into her father's study. 

By the time Hermione caught up she was already taking shelter behind her father's tall frame. Theo grinned at Hermione, standing tall like a barrier between the two panting witches. “Really, Theodosia? Hiding behind your father is cheating, and I would expect better from my Goddaughter.” Hermione nodded in agreement with Draco’s words. The blond was sitting on a small couch, a toddler balanced on his knee, and a glass of firewhiskey in his hand. 

“Nathaniel is your favorite anyway.” Theodosia pouted, her small hands grabbing her father's trousers as she stuck her tongue out at the blond. Draco looked taken aback before standing up, and handing the toddler to Hermione. Hermione wrangled her son from the wizard, pinching the toddlers cheeks until he erupted in a symphony of laughter. 

Hermione watched the scene unfold before her, feeling a warmth press into her chest as she thought about how blessed she was. A week after the year end celebration Hermione had remembered to inquire what Theodore had asked of Rowena. He had smiled down at her, and had told her in a soft voice, “I wanted her opinion before I gave you this.” Hermione’s eyes had watered when Theo had pulled out a small black box, the simple engagement inside nothing compared to the gesture. Of course she had said yes. 

Their wedding was small, held out at the lake by Malfoy Manor. Occasionally she would look at the pictures of that afternoon, and wonder what the hell she was thinking wearing such an extravagant gown on such a hot day. Then, she would remember the look on Theo’s face when he had seen her walk down the aisle, Harry guiding her, and she would remember why she had done it. They had been married for three years before Hermione had found out she was pregnant. 

Theodosia Alcea Nott was the spitting image of her mother, with bright brown eyes and slightly too big teeth. The only things she seemed to inherit from her father was his attitude, which at five she had plenty of, and his hair-the latter of which Hermione was thankful for. 

Nathaniel Theodore Nott was not so lucky. His brown hair already quirked up at odd ends, and was bushy, but it was soft to the touch. Theo had spent hours telling Hermione how happy he was that at least one of his children had been born with her hair. She had spent hours telling him exactly how hard such curls were to manage. Nathaniel had also inherited his father's bright blue eyes, but at the tender age of two it was still too young to tell if they changed shades like his fathers did. 

“I do not like Nathaniel better,” Draco’s admonishing tone brought Hermione back to the present. “I love you both equally.” The blond bent down to the girl, giving her a raspberry on her cheek before throwing her over his shoulder. “Now,” he said, spinning her around several times, “Why don’t you go and see what Uncle Blaise is cooking? Mmm? There is a galleon in it for you!” He asked, setting her down. The little girl wobbled a second before darting off towards the doorway. 

“She is so spoiled.” Hermione scoffed, rolling her eyes before sitting down, setting her son against her side. “What did you need to talk to me about?” 

For the first time in several years, Draco actually seemed nervous. More nervous than when he had told Hermione he had planned to propose to Blaise. The Italian had beat him to the punch, proposing to the blond that very night. The fact that Draco couldn’t spend his galleons on someone else for a change had made Hermione laugh-until Draco had bought Blaise a ring as well. They had been happily married for six years. 

“I-uhh need to ask you two for a favor. Well really, I need to ask  _ you _ a favor, Hermione.” Hermione nodded, waving her hand gently indicating for him to continue. It had been years since he had called her Hermione, choosing to stick with ‘Granger’, mostly to annoy Theo who always corrected the name with ‘It’s Nott now.’

“Have you ever heard of invitro-fertilization?” Draco probed. Hermione nodded, a gentle smile coming to her face, already knowing where this conversation was going. Theo, on the other hand, had his face scrunched up in confusion. Hermione rolled her eyes, quickly explaining it to the wizard. Theo’s eyes went wide before he looked at Draco astonished. 

“You want Hermione to carry your child?” 

“Yeah,” Draco rubbed the back of his hair, “Blaise and I have discussed wanting one. I am the last of the Malfoy’s, and the Black’s only have me and Teddy. I don’t want either house to die out.” He looked ashamed, like what he was asking was something wrong. 

“Draco,” Hermione began, “There is nothing wrong with wanting a child that is your flesh and blood. ”

“I just don’t want people to think I’m doing this to better the Malfoy name...you know...since you are a muggle-born.” Draco’s voice sounded choked.

“Are you?”

“No! Of course not!” Draco shook his head violently in answer to Theo’s question. “Hermione is the only witch I would trust to carry my child.” Theo nodded in understanding, a hand coming up to clasp on his friend's shoulder. 

“It’s up to Hermione, but I think it is a wonderful idea.”

“Of course I will do it.” Hermione smiled. Draco looked slightly shocked, before a look of elation crossed his pointy features. He reached out wrapping Hermione in a tight hug before pulling back and sipping on his firewhiskey. 

“Nothing is set in stone yet, I just wanted my options clear.” Malfoy nodded before taking a long drink of his firewhiskey. Hermione opened her mouth, about to change the subject when there was a loud bang from down the hall. The three friends, and one small toddler, walked out to see what happened. 

There was smoke rolling from the kitchen. Blaise stumbled out of the room, coughing roughly, with Theodosia in his arms. “Not to worry, just a bit of accidental magic!” The Italian called, coughing again, “But...I would like to suggest we eat out tonight.”Blaise smiled, giving the worried looking Theodosia a pat on the back.

Everyone nodded their agreement, summoning their cloaks from the wall. Hermione made sure the kitchen wasn’t on fire before looking for Theodosia’s pink shoes. The girl insisted only the pink ones would do because they matched her dress. 

Theo came up behind her while Hermione was staring at her children, Theodosia in Draco’s arms and Nathaniel in Blaise’s. “We are lucky,” He whispered gently into her ear. Hermione felt a chill work its way down her spine, and smiled. She turned her head towards Theo kissing him tenderly. She murmured her agreement, before he deepened the kiss. A soft clearing of a throat brought them back to Earth, their daughter stood before them one hand on her hip. Giving an eye roll that would make her godfather happy, she motioned towards the door. 

They were lucky indeed. 


End file.
